through the fire
take me to paradise | a kaistal collectionthrough the fire
pg, 543w
of course, behind every headline is a story
There are some things that they never tell you: unspoken rules not written in contracts, consequences not spelled out until you experience it yourself – and by then, it's usually too late. Jongin chooses to think that these circumstances make him stronger, like being refined in the hottest part of the flame. Use it to fuel him. Burn everything to ashes.
He doesn't know, however, if he was quite prepared for this inferno:
[BREAKING] EXO's Kai and f(x)'s Krystal dating!
And there it is.
Of course, behind every headline is a story. Jongin looks back now and remembers. Remembers how even the moment he had fallen for Soojung (head-over-heels and absolutely whipped), there was still this underlying fear that he was not even his own to give anymore. Remembers as they wrestled through the mess of their feelings (sweaty palms and ungraceful kisses a stark contrast to the charisma and poise everyone else sees) and untangled the hard questions to which they still have never found answers (do I allow myself to love? should we give ourselves a chance? is it even worth it?). Remembers as they decided to take a leap of faith – when exactly, he doesn't know, because Jongin knows he was long gone the second he realized that his long-time friend was someone so, so much more. That he wouldn't mind if she nagged him about his fashion choices, and that he most definitely wouldn't mind waking up next to her every morning.
When the news comes out, his first instinct is to call her, to make sure she's doing okay.
She doesn't pick up. Jongin just shuts his eyes, the knot in his stomach intensifying with each passing minute.
She picks up on his fifth call. "I just...I just need some time," she says, her voice shaking, raspy breaths harsh against his ear. He simply nods. Lets himself cry before putting on a brave face for the rest of his schedules. He's in a state of limbo, puffy eyes that can't be covered with make-up and no idea how to face the crowd. He wants to say sorry, but chokes up just thinking about it. So he says nothing.
The show must go on.
He doesn't allow himself to fully process what is going on until he sees her. There's a gap in their schedules, and Jongin pleads his manager to drive him to her place in the dead of night, being as careful as he can. When the door shuts behind them, he practically stumbles into her arms, chin resting on her head and breathing her in. Home. Rest. Soojung. Away from prying eyes and camera flashes.
They've settled on her couch with Soojung's head resting on his lap, surrounded by a pile of tear-stained tissues and junk food. "Do you regret it?" Soojung whispers, and Jongin looks down at her and wonders why it would ever be a crime to love someone as beautiful as Soojung.
"No, not for a second," Jongin says. And it's cheesy, and it doesn't really dissolve all the other problems hanging over their heads, but for them, it's enough.
Soojung reaches over to intertwine her fingers with his.
And so they hold hands, walking into the hottest part of the flame.
He doesn't know, however, if he was quite prepared for this inferno:
[BREAKING] EXO's Kai and f(x)'s Krystal dating!
And there it is.
Of course, behind every headline is a story. Jongin looks back now and remembers. Remembers how even the moment he had fallen for Soojung (head-over-heels and absolutely whipped), there was still this underlying fear that he was not even his own to give anymore. Remembers as they wrestled through the mess of their feelings (sweaty palms and ungraceful kisses a stark contrast to the charisma and poise everyone else sees) and untangled the hard questions to which they still have never found answers (do I allow myself to love? should we give ourselves a chance? is it even worth it?). Remembers as they decided to take a leap of faith – when exactly, he doesn't know, because Jongin knows he was long gone the second he realized that his long-time friend was someone so, so much more. That he wouldn't mind if she nagged him about his fashion choices, and that he most definitely wouldn't mind waking up next to her every morning.
When the news comes out, his first instinct is to call her, to make sure she's doing okay.
She doesn't pick up. Jongin just shuts his eyes, the knot in his stomach intensifying with each passing minute.
She picks up on his fifth call. "I just...I just need some time," she says, her voice shaking, raspy breaths harsh against his ear. He simply nods. Lets himself cry before putting on a brave face for the rest of his schedules. He's in a state of limbo, puffy eyes that can't be covered with make-up and no idea how to face the crowd. He wants to say sorry, but chokes up just thinking about it. So he says nothing.
The show must go on.
He doesn't allow himself to fully process what is going on until he sees her. There's a gap in their schedules, and Jongin pleads his manager to drive him to her place in the dead of night, being as careful as he can. When the door shuts behind them, he practically stumbles into her arms, chin resting on her head and breathing her in. Home. Rest. Soojung. Away from prying eyes and camera flashes.
They've settled on her couch with Soojung's head resting on his lap, surrounded by a pile of tear-stained tissues and junk food. "Do you regret it?" Soojung whispers, and Jongin looks down at her and wonders why it would ever be a crime to love someone as beautiful as Soojung.
"No, not for a second," Jongin says. And it's cheesy, and it doesn't really dissolve all the other problems hanging over their heads, but for them, it's enough.
Soojung reaches over to intertwine her fingers with his.
And so they hold hands, walking into the hottest part of the flame.
sorry for the hiatus! i also wrote another pretty long two-shot a while ago, so check it out here if you're still feeling kaistal-deprived! i promise it will make you in a good mood :) hehe
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