It was a new step in our relationship, one that I didn’t mind but took some time to get used to. Sometimes, he would hold me in a way that would make my body flame and that was always a cause of embarrassment.

            After we’ve both been spent, Kris brushed the hair off my forehead and grinned. “Why are you so shy?” I pointedly looked the other way. It was one thing to know without saying it out loud, but to openly acknowledge it was embarrassing. “It’s not like this is our first time, and if I recall correctly, you handled that pretty well.” 

            I slapped his arm, a little taken aback by how much I’ve changed and growled. “Stop trying to make fun of me.”

            “Make fun of you? But surely not, princess. I wouldn’t dare.”

            His hand started to wander again and I slapped it away before getting up. “My mom invited you for dinner. Do you want to come? My brother will be back from college and you get to finally meet him.”

            Kris stood and pulled on his clothes with a slightly guarded look. “Would your brother try to intimidate me?”

            I shook my head. “He’s never really cared about how I was. It’s mainly his own life and how he thinks people affect him that matters. He’ll probably see you and never talk to you throughout the day.”

            He looked slightly relieved. “Well he sounds like quite a character.”

            I wrinkled my nose. “You have no idea.”

            Dinner was interesting. Unlike what I thought, Kris completely won him over. “So you’re a history major?” Your brother, who normally looked down on humanities majors, was intrigued. “What do you plan on doing with your job?”

            Kris smiled politely. “My father was part of a special forces in China. I believe that I would like to join something similar.”

            And it was with a wide smile that my brother finally waved goodbye to Kris. The two of us walked out into the crisp March air and he looked at me. “That wasn’t so bad. I thought he was just going to say one word and that was it?”

            I grinned and shrugged. “Looks like you completely charmed him. What can I say? It’s a talent of yours.”

            Kris looked down at me with a serious expression on his face. “You’re really serious about this?”

            I was taken aback. What had sparked this sudden change in demeanor and even though I had a feeling I knew what he was asking, I still asked him, “What do you mean?”

            “The two of us. I know I haven’t been gone in a couple of months but this is never a guarantee. I don’t know when I would be leaving you, and for how long.”

            “Look, one day you’re going to have to face your father and let him know that you want no part in his plan.”      

            “If it were that simple, I would have done it by then.”

            I looked at him. “What’s wrong?”

            “I’m the only one he’s told the plan to who doesn’t agree. Do you think he’s going to allow someone against his great plans to live happily, unnoticed? He’s scared I’m going to go to the government. He’s going to keep me at his side forever or he’s going to kill me.”

            “Who don’t you go to the government? They’ll be able to give you protection and then your father would be stopped.”

            Kris was quiet. “Because the majority of the government is already on his side. I don’t know who to turn to who wouldn’t give me in.”

            We walked down aimlessly and he looked at me. “I’m serious. I don’t want to drag you in. We can’t have a stable relationship.”

            I stared at him fiercely and tried to put my emotions into words. I tried to find the words that would be able to explain to him why I wouldn’t let him go. I took a deep breath and finally told him the reason why I had been so reluctant to answer his original love confession.

            “I was in love with a family friend when I was young. He was only a few years older than me and he promised me everything. We were still kids but he showed me a magical world, and he made up stories about fairy tale places he would take me. He was the only one I’ve ever shown my drawings to besides my family, and besides you now. It was a young, puppy crush but it broke me when he moved away with no contact. But you managed to draw me in again. I’m not stupid enough to fall in love with someone who would hurt me again.”

            Kris looked at me with his mouth slightly agape. I stared back defiantly and realized that we had walked back to my house. “I’m going to drop you here. I’m sorry, I didn’t know. I just wanted you to know what you were getting into.”

            “Do you think I didn’t know already, what with all your random disappearances during the first term?”

            He smiled bashfully and kissed me gently. “I don’t want you to get hurt.”

            “Let me be the judge of that, please,” I told him firmly.

            He touched my arm and smiled. “Okay. I love you.”