To Hear It Again

 

 

 

              "Aren't you going to say anything?"

 

              Taeyeon had been looking down the entire time, her blonde hair falling over her dark eyes. But she slowly met her gaze at what she just asked.

              Tiffany fought the urge to stand up and walk over to Taeyeon because it slightly alarmed her at what she saw.

              That expression was something Tiffany had never seen before on Taeyeon.

 

              Or maybe once.

              When they were watching a crappy romantic film that ended up in causing pain and eventually...

 

              That time, Taeyeon turned to her with such hopeful and yet sad eyes that made her chest ache. She had asked softly, "Let's not be like that, ever."

 

              Tiffany could feel her eyes sting.

              Of all the memories that could resurface, it had to be that.

 

              "What do you want me to say? What do you want to hear?"

 

              Tiffany shook her head, not wanting to entertain those types of questions from her, especially when she could easily feel Taeyeon's effort to keep herself level-headed.

             

              Both of them were hurting.

              But Taeyeon was also angry.

 

              Who wouldn't be?

              Tiffany asked for them to go separate paths, or in her words earlier:

 

              "I think, we should break up."

 

              Not really subtle.

              But she thought that it was all for the best.

              For the two of them...for Taeyeon.

 

              She knew that Taeyeon hated talking about sensitive topics, topics that hurt her or render her helpless.

              So Tiffany gave it to her straight.

 

              She also knew that Taeyeon hated seeing her cry.

              So Tiffany held herself in check as a last favor to her, before they 'break-up.'

 

              "If you want me to say 'okay, we're over,' then--then..."

 

              Taeyeon's shoulders suddenly shook.

 

              "Where did this come from, Tiffany? What did I do?"

 

              "Please, don't ask me that," she almost pleaded, her hand tightly clenched on the armrest of the couch.

 

              "I just had a tiring day and then you greet me with this?" Taeyeon asked again through gritted teeth, her eyes glistening. "What kind of reaction do you want to get? Tell me, damn it!"

 

              Tiffany noticed how Taeyeon’s lower lip was trembling.

              She had to look away. She was not used to seeing Taeyeon like that.

 

              She couldn’t remember the last time she saw her laugh either.

 

 

              And that was what hurt her the most.

 

              Taeyeon was no longer happy with her.

 

 

              With one wish in mind, Tiffany asked the one question that could either save the both of them... or completely end everything.

 

 

              "Tell me how I make you feel."

 

 

* * *

 

 

              She felt like a scheming wart-free witch, or a pink ogre with an eye-smile.

 

              Tiffany forced her eye-smiles amid an aching head, a terrible flu and a sore throat. She knew Taeyeon wouldn’t be able to refuse her with that.

              She demanded a lot of things, from damp cloth patted on her forehead every now and then or hands to continuously rub comforting patterns on her back, to clear soups being fed to her even to the last spoonful, or drinking juice made from fruits that were not in season.

              And Tiffany proved her method effective once more as Taeyeon moved about to change the bed sheets, the mattress and her clothes.

              It was not an effortless endeavor though, especially when Tiffany's limbs felt sore and weak. Taeyeon had to help her into a pair of clean pajamas.

 

              Tiffany was having an equally hard time sitting still on the cold floor, even though Taeyeon wrapped a thick blanket around her to keep her warm. So she decided on becoming a pain in return, to salve herself in her unwanted moments of 'vulnerability.' Tiffany threw a hissy fit along with crumpled balls of tissue, and gave out threats under her breath.

 

              "Do it right."

              "Don't you dare miss a wrinkle."

              "Can't this get any slower?"

 

              But still, when she was back on the bed, finally tucked in, Taeyeon was beaming at her as she sat on her bedside, patting her hands.

              Tiffany squinted at her through watery eyes. “Are you making fun of me?”

 

              “Yes, you ugly red-nosed slob on the bed.”

 

              Tiffany couldn’t help but tear up at what Taeyeon just called her.

 

              She was having the most unforgiving flu her body could ever handle.

              Her clothes, sticking uncomfortably on her back.

              Her sore throat forced her to talk and shout less.

              The meds were making her woozy, like her brain was swimming inside her aching head.

              Her 'red' nose was still runny and boxes of tissue from their stack were almost gone.

              She felt sensitive to everything that was being said about her.

              And Taeyeon was plainly being mean.

 

              Tiffany weakly pried her hands away from Taeyeon’s and grabbed her blanket to cover her face.

              Taeyeon chuckled, amused.

 

              “Do you hate me this much now?" Tiffany shouted hoarsely through the fabric. "I know I’ve been a whiny, demanding monster to you but do you need to call me that?”

 

              She heard Taeyeon laugh softly as she felt her lay beside her on the bed.

 

              “Stay away from me!”

 

              “Come on, let me see you.”

 

              “After what you just called me?”

 

              But Taeyeon easily managed to pull the blanket aside to show half of her face.

 

              Tiffany's eyes widened at the proximity of Taeyeon's face on hers.

              They were almost sharing one pillow.

 

              Taeyeon was intently staring at her. Unblinking. Unwavering.

              Tiffany almost leaned closer, as a response.

 

              But she snapped out of her trance and closed her eyes in her last attempt to avoid Taeyeon. Then, Tiffany felt fingers her pale and sullen cheeks.

 

              “Do you know how much you make me happy?” Taeyeon whispered, unclenching her hands from their grip on the blanket before taking them to her lips.

 

              Taeyeon gave butterfly kisses to her knuckles.

 

              Tiffany's eyes fluttered open and saw a sincerely-smiling and glowing Taeyeon.

 

              The sight sent shivers down her spine.

 

              Amidst the lump forming in that didn't have anything to do with her flu, Tiffany offered the best eye-smile she could muster while trying to blink away the sensitivity and petty doubts she felt earlier.

 

              Taeyeon was also blinking away, returning her smile just as apologetically, her chin dimples showing. "Now, I hope you do."

 

              Tiffany sniffed.

 

 

              "What else does our Tiffany want?"

 

              "Just stay here. Don't go anywhere..."

 

 

 

* * *

 

 

 

              The apartment was still.

              The droning of the AC welcomed her.

 

              Taeyeon tiredly got out of her blazer and placed it on the couch, along with her shoulder bag. She just had a drink with their good friend Sunny, but they made her go home earlier, seeing that she could barely open her eyes.

 

              Tiffany was already asleep.

              Taeyeon saw the faint glow of the bedside lamp through the crack of their bedroom door as she dragged her way to the kitchen.

 

              Before she reached the counter, her heels abruptly came in contact with something soft. She looked down and black beady eyes stared up at her.

 

              A new pair of fluffy white rabbit bedroom slippers were intentionally placed on the floor for her to see.

 

              Taeyeon broke into a weary but open grin. She immediately stepped out of her heels and into the slippers. Her smile grew wider as she felt the softness of material covering her feet. She wiggled her toes inside and swung her arms about.

 

              She stopped halfway as she caught sight of a pink Post-it note stuck on the thermos on top of the counter. Taeyeon sat on the counter stool and read Tiffany's neat handwriting.

 

             Bought tea, chamomile.

 

              She smiled at the pink heart drawn at the corner. She looked at her favorite mug beside the thermos. The tea bag was in it.

 

              It warmed her instantly.

              And she wasn't even having a drink yet.

 

              Taeyeon carefully folded the note from Tiffany before she slipped it inside her pocket. Then, she stood up and put the tea bag and thermos away. She planned on having it the following morning.

 

              Leaving her heels by the counter, she walked to their bedroom using her new bedroom slippers, occasionally stopping in her tracks to wiggle her toes inside.

 

             

              With her heart beating, she went to her side of the bed and joined Tiffany.

 

              She came home tired.

              Late.

              Again.

 

              Taeyeon wrapped her arms around Tiffany's waist.

              She felt sorry.

 

              Tiffany moaned softly as she stirred awake.

 

              Taeyeon buried her face in Tiffany's dark wavy locks in greeting.

 

              “You had a drink with Sunny again?” Tiffany asked huskily.

 

              “Just a little…”

 

              Tiffany leaned closer in her embrace as Taeyeon sighed onto the back of her neck.

 

              “What gave me away?” Taeyeon couldn't help but ask.

 

              “You smell like a crowded bar on a Friday night, mixed with Sunny’s sweet perfume.”

 

              “Oh," came her reaction. Taeyeon could feel her eyelids getting heavier. She relaxed more into the warmth.

 

              “Take a shower first before you sleep.”

 

              “I’m too tired.” Taeyeon snuggled closer, purposely breathing on the back of Tiffany's neck.

              She took in how the other shivered.

 

              “I’ll dry your hair for you,” Tiffany offered, running her hands over Taeyeon's forearms.

 

              "Tempting, but no."

 

               “Come on, you can rest better after a good shower.” Tiffany nudged her shoulder on Taeyeon's. “I don't care much about how you smell right now but you’ll get uncomfortable later, you’ll see.”

 

              “Are you nagging right now?”

 

              “Yes, I am.”

 

              Taeyeon smiled to herself, slowly giving in to slumber.

 

              “You hate it?” Tiffany asked.

 

 

              She held her closer as a reply.

 

 

* * *

 

 

              It hurt to recall them.

              Tiffany wondered if it hurt Taeyeon back to hear them all.

 

              "You no longer talk to me about what's going on with you," she said. She was standing, closer to where Taeyeon was. "And when we do have the chance to, you space out or stay silent."

 

              For it hurt to utter them from a distance...

 

              "For a few months, Taeyeon, I haven't seen you laugh or smile whenever you're with me."

 

              ... and let the words reverberate through the walls of the room.

 

              "You made me feel like I was alone in this."

 

              So she just chose to say them up close. Softly.

 

              "So tell me, please, right now."

 

              Taeyeon retreated to the wall and leaned back for support.

              Tiffany stepped closer, in alarm, as an automatic response.

 

              Taeyeon flinched at her sudden movement. She opened to talk again... but no words came out. Instead, she buried her face onto her hands and let out a pained groan. She weakly slid down on the cold floor, her shoulders shaking.

 

              Tiffany kneeled down beside her. She wanted to reach a hand out to wipe the wet streaks on Taeyeon's cheeks but... she needed this. She wouldn't stay for someone who didn't want her back.

              No matter how she still--

 

              "Don't do this."

 

              Taeyeon choked through mounting sobs. "Things are--things are not going smoothly like before. Work was... We're barely... just barely."

 

              Without looking up, in a low trembling voice, and with her heart exposed for Tiffany.

 

              "Don't leave," Taeyeon asked...pleaded. "You're the only remaining reason I'm still bearing it all."

 

              Tiffany's hand went up to and stifled a cry.

              Taeyeon was openly--

 

              "I'll learn to laugh and smile more. Through all of these, I--I will..."

 

              Taeyeon finally looked up, meeting her eyes with equally misty ones. Unblinking. Unwavering. Trying.

 

              "You don't know how much, how much you make me happy."

 

 

              Tiffany smiled through the lump in .

 

              She had heard what she wanted to hear.

              It was a start. A new start.

 

              She offered the best eye-smile she could muster while trying to blink away the hurt and doubts she felt. Then she offered her arms for Taeyeon to come back into.

 

 

              "Let's do better this time," she whispered against Taeyeon's temple. "I'll stay, Taeyeon-ah."

 

              Over and over.

 

              "I'm staying."

 

 

 

 

---END---

 

 

 

 

 

A/N:

My first one-shot.

And that was Taeny in the middle of breaking up, hahaha... That was my premise, btw.

Thank you for reading!

 

If I don’t have that much update on my main fic, you can probably find me here… It’s actually becoming a habit, writing shorts in between NSNOE.

 

Oh well... Please do comment since I'm open to constructive criticisms and such.

 

Thanks again for reading~!