Title: Do You Remember? -Luhan-

Genre: Angst

Other notes: Thanks to nrfzhfd for helping me writting this.

Hey Kyungmi, do you still remember me? I am the one that defended you against those mean jocks at school. I was the one who chased you when you ran to the back of the school because the cheerleaders mocked your hair. I was the one who comforted you and held you in my arms until the school hour’s end. Do you remember me now?

Good. Do you remember that moment when you confessed to me? You just ran after you said those three words, because you were afraid that I didn’t return the feelings. Silly girl. I loved you since the day you accidentally spilled orange juice on my shirt when we were at preschool. You were 5 back then, and I was 6. Your eyes were wide open as you apologized a million of times.

I still remember your face, you know. You have big and glassy doe-like eyes, like mine. I guess that is why our friends labeled us the deer couple. It was so cute watching you hide you face in your hands in embarrassment. They like teasing me about you, about your hair, about your thick glasses, and even about the fact that you most probably love Math more than me. But I just laughed it off, saying that I love you the way you are.

Do you remember when Suho’s little sister tried to use a curler on your hair? You squealed and jumped off the chair. She was mad, but she got over it when you apologized and explained that you would rather stay yourself. I like that. I like that you wanted to stay yourself. I don’t want you to change. Not ever.

Do you remember our first kiss? It was on our first date at the Han River. You looked so beautiful that night. Suho’s little sister was right in lending you that cute dress. It wasn’t too revealing, it wasn’t too closed up like the usual ones you would wear. It was just perfect. You look dazzling in that dress. Your lips felt nice and soft when I landed mine on them. You were so shy that time when we broke it. You were hiding your face in my hair the whole time.

Do you remember our 100^th day kiss? It was sweet, just like you. It tasted like strawberries. Maybe it was because I stole it from your mouth. You were mad, but you still love me. I like kissing you. Your lips are so soft; it makes me longing for it when I wasn’t with you. You are so stingy in giving kisses to me; it was always me who’s giving it. But the 100^th day kiss was special. Why? Because you were the one who initiated it. It felt so special. All the fireworks inside me exploded.

Do you remember our double date with Sehun? He had this beautiful girl with him. You felt like you are not worthy for me when you saw Sehun dating someone as equally beautiful as he is. I smiled in amusement. You are perfect for me. In fact, I think I was not worthy for you. You were so perfect. Sehun’s girlfriend complimented your pretty face, but you denied it. She keeps on insisting it until you caved in, just to make her happy. You did make her happy. She was jumping up and down and insisted on treating you ice cream. You finally made a friend.

Do you remember that day when I got beaten up by the jocks because I was standing up for you when they were making jokes about you? I was so mad I lost it. I punched the biggest, making his nose bleed. His friends backed up for him and started punching me. Well Kyungmi, it’s pretty easy that 6 against 1, I lost badly. It’s a good thing Kai was passing by. He beat the other jocks for me and took me to the park and called you. When you came, you were so shocked seeing my bleeding face. You scolded me for fighting with the jocks but you still treated my wounds. You stayed with me in my house for about a week, just to make sure I eat properly and someone treated my wounds every day. You were so caring.

Do you remember that time when I had that call when my aunt said that my sick father died? It was the first time you saw me cry. I was so mad; I broke anything in my way. Even Kai and Sehun could calm me. But when you touched my shoulder and brought me into a hug, it felt so calming. So I stopped breaking things and cried in your arms. You cried with me and gently my back. You said it was okay. You said that he looks at me from above. You calmed me, it was a miracle.

Do you remember that time when I proposed to you? You were so shocked. Your doe-like eyes went wide. I chuckled at the funny sight, but I was serious. I love you, and I want to be with you forever, never leaving your side. I kneeled for about 3 minutes, waiting for you to relieve from your shock. You shyly smiled as you nodded slowly. I quickly stood up and put the ring on for you. You smiled happily through your tears as I hugged you.

Do you remember our wedding day? You looked so beautiful wearing that long wedding gown. Your face looks pretty, as if you were shining. You weren’t wearing your glasses that day. Suho’s little sister finally made you take it off and wear contacts instead. You were shaking when your father handed your hand to mine. I gripped it tight and whispered it’s going to be okay. You smiled to me, that one angelic smile that turns my knees to jelly. When the priest said it was time for us to kiss, I cupped your smiling face and kissed you softly. The audience behind us stood up and clapped. I felt so happy.

Do you remember our first night? You cooked me kimchi spaghetti, the one that Kyungsoo used to make. I guess you learned something from him, because it tastes so good. We watched a movie, Titanic. I put on the subtitles, since I wasn’t fluent in English like you are. You wiped your tears when Jack let go of Rose, you wiped your tears when Jack died. After the movie ended, you wiped your tears and smiled at me. I kissed those tears away for you. After that I gently kiss your lips. Then we went to bed, me cuddling you and humming your favorite tune until you fell asleep. Your face is so pretty when you sleep. You look like an angel.

So you remember… Do you remember, my dear Kyungmi, when you fainted when you went down the stairs, and then tumbled to the end of the stairs. I was so worried when I got to the hospital after the call that our neighbor made. You know what the doctor told me? You had a brain tumor. A serious one, it cannot be cure anymore. I cried, Kyungmi. I cried so hard that the doctor placed a hand on my shoulder, saying, ‘son, it would be better that you don’t cry. It would be better that you go out there with a smile and spend the rest of her 6 months life to the fullest,’

And guess what, Kyungmi? I did.

I took you to every place you want. L.A, New York, Philippines, and even Canada. You were so happy, it hurts me to know that you only have a day left.

That last day, we went to a secret place I know. Do you remember the koi pond with all the grass around it? You were so happy. We laid there on the grass, staring at the sky in silence. I intertwined my hands with yours, my heart heavy because I know you’ll leave in any second from now.

And you did. You breath suddenly turned ragged. You gripped my hands tightly as I hugged you. You said it hurts, it hurts so bad.

Kyungmi, it hurts me even more, do you know that? It hurts me even more seeing you suffer. At last, you breathed out your last breath. I cried after your soul left. It hurts so badly, Kyungmi.

Hey Kyungmi, do you know that I am now sitting next to your grave? I am sitting next to it, humming your favorite song right now.

I miss you Kyungmi. I miss you very much.

I love you too. Very much.

I love you, Kyungmi.