Love is Like a Star
Are You My Shinning Star?
Sohee’s POV
“Oppa,
I wondered how you are doing. I hope you are doing well. I don’t know why I’m writing this to you, but I just do for some reason. Do you remember our promise? I waited for you for so long, but you never showed up. You broke my heart and you probably don’t even know it. I guess I could thank you for showing me the harsh reality of life. It helped me become more cautious of love and life. I know I won’t make that mistake again. I don’t know if we were meant to be together and I don’t know if we are ever going to find out. So for now I only wish for your success and happiness.
-Sohee”
“Do you want to send? Yes or No?”
I fidget as my finger hover over the choices; will I have enough courage to send this? Exhaling the breath I was holding I clicked no and saved the message, along with all the other ones. I never had the courage to send them to him and now my phone is going to fill up with all of those messages. Those messages I will never send. “Why can’t I stop being like this,” I wondered to myself with a sigh.
Sitting up in my bed and glancing around the room I saw that everyone else was sleeping. Taking the chance I grab a light shawl and went out on the patio. I took a deep breath and look at the view; the city was so peaceful right now. There wasn’t a lot of traffic and you could see Seoul tower from here. There was a bunch of sparkling lights everywhere with the snow that made the city look like a winter wonderland, almost.
“Why is love so much like a star”, I thought to myself as I stared into the night sky.
“I can still remember that day so clearly in my head…the day when I finally found the courage to tell you what I felt, but then…will I ever be able to move on?” I paused and scolded myself, didn’t I tell myself I would not think like this anymore.
Feeling tired and defeated, I went and sat down on the patio chair. The wind blew by gently in the night as if it was reminding me of that day again. “It’s so cold, why is it so cold right now?” I wondered this to myself as I pulled my shawl closer around me to keep in the warmth. It’s like no matter what I do I just can’t lose the memories of that day, everything reminded me of him.
“Are you thinking of him again?” a voice asked from behind me as I felt someone put a glass of orange juice on the table beside me and sat down.
Someone else handed me a blanket and sat down on the other side of me. I put a smile on as I open the blanket for us.
Someone else handed me a blanket and sat down on the other side of me. I put a smile on as I open the blanket for us.
“I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to wake you guys.” I said quietly as I leaned back on the couch.
“It’s okay Sohee; we’re just worry about you.” Lim said as she handed me the glass of orange juice, which I accepted.
“Maknae is right, Mandu. We’re just worry about you. So tell us what’s on your mind.” Mimi said from the other side as she patted my head like a mom would do to a kid.
“No way.” I told Mimi as I stuck my tongue out to her. “It’s nothing, really.” I stated as I drank some orange juice.
“Mandu! You should know that you can’t hide these things from us, you face tells all.” Mimi stated as she stood so she could get a better view of my face.
I knew that one look at my face and they could tell what’s wrong with me. Taking my time to drink my orange juice I wondered if I could come up with a lie. I really wished at times like this I wished my poker face would work on them.
“Mimi Unnie!” I whined as Lim started to giggle beside me. I was playing my last card; we all knew that Mimi hated being called ‘Unnie’, she thought it made her seem old.
Mimi’s face started to turn red as I held onto Lim’s arm, no one ever wanted to get in the way of our mad alien. Everyone knew that as she will make you feel so bad you wish you were never born.
“Mandu, you better start spilling right now, I know it’s about him. You only call me that when you want me to get mad.” Mimi smiled coolly as her face return to normal.
“Sohee, what were you thinking about?” Lim asked beside me with those big puppy dog eyes of her.
Argh, I hate it when they do this to me, they won’t stop until I tell them. Taking a deep breath I told them I was thinking of him again. They nodded and smiled from time to time as they comforted me when I finished. They knew about all of this already.
“You know what I think, why are the stars so far away? It’s almost like a star can represent love. You can love it all you want but it’s always going to be out of reach, but if you’re lucky enough and you can get one. You better love it with all you got. You only get one in your life and if you don’t hold onto it then it’s gone forever. Just like a star in the sky, it’s so unreachable. I thought he was my star but he wasn’t. I don’t know think I would ever find my star. I don’t think I can…” I told them with a sad smile.
I have moved on by now but my heart is always replaying those memories in my mind, never letting me forget it. It’s not that I can’t forget him; I just can’t fall in love again. I’m scared to be hurt again. There are too many scars and memories that just won’t disappear. It’s not possible for me to fall and I don’t expect myself to ever fall back in love. I’ve closed my heart off to love.
“Mandu, you guys just weren’t meant to be if it turned out like this. You’ll find your star one day.” Mimi told me as she hugged me.
“Who need boys right now anyways, we got each other!” Lim said as she also squeezed me.
“Thanks, but can you guys please stop squeezing me; I’ll become a squish mandu soon.” I told them as I smiled.
“We will on one condition, you’ve got to promise that you’ll try to move on and get better.” Mimi said as she hugged me harder.
Lim nodded her head in agreement and also said, “You also got to go on some dates and open your heart more. How else are you going to find your star?”
“Okay, I can try, I can’t promise that I will but I can try…it’s time for me to move on.” I told them, I honestly don’t know if I would be able to but I can at least try, I thought.
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This is my first time posting up a story and everything so i hope you guys like it. Sorry if there are grammers and spelling mistakes. Please feel free to ask and comment if it don't make sense ^^
- shy_lover
EDIT: i just fixed some of the grammer mistakes and such... ^^
Here some MiSo and SoLim Pics :)
- shy_lover
EDIT: i just fixed some of the grammer mistakes and such... ^^
Here some MiSo and SoLim Pics :)
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