I’m as much a slave of your emotions as I am of mine.

I feel like I’ve just been doused with boiling water as the harsh realization slaps me in the face. I’ve been foolish. I’m an idiot. I gave you all you ever wanted without ever expecting anything in return. I did everything for you. I don’t know why it took me so long to grasp our situation. I’ve been so daft. How come it never dawned on me that you were never going to give yourself to me fully? You were never capable of giving anyone yourself fully. It was always a part of your allure that I failed to realize until a few minutes ago.

I was your slave:  Your loyal servant. I didn’t give a hoot about others’ opinions about me. I treated you like a princess. I no longer cared about others. When you cried, I did everything to put a smile on your face. I did every funny thing I could think of, even if I looked idiotic as hell. When you felt insecure, I whispered all the sweetest quotes I searched on the net specifically for you. When you had a craving, I’d scourge all the convenient stores in the city just for that one particular flavour you took a liking too. I was fully devoted to you, devoted to the point that I lost sight of myself.

You were an ice princess. I mistook your hard exterior as a façade. Little did I know that mask was already you skin. Your crude nature and crass comments went through one ear and went out the other. I was certain there was warmth buried deep within you. There were moments when I felt a kind spirit within you. It was simply an illusion. I fooled myself into believing there was a hidden goodness within you. How stupid I was.

Now I sit in this dingy coffee shop lamenting on the months I’ve wasted. As the coffee enters my system and I drown in the music, I mull over what went between us. I did not know I was trying to change you. Forgive me. I was blinded by my love for you. How I fell for you is still a complete mystery to me. I’d be struggling to attain that knowledge if I wanted to know. Thinking about it now, I wouldn’t want to know anymore. Some things are better left untouched. As they say, ignorance is bliss.

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A/N: Sorry for this short update. I felt down. Just so you know, this is a spur-of-the-moment entry.

I'm currently working on Laundrylady and possibly Kid next.

Readers, have you ever fallen in love? I'm just curious. (For clarification: I'm not in love. I just want to know if you have) You can choose to answer this question or not. All your replies are appreciated. Thank you for reading.