My little sister stares at me in shock. I chuckle lowly, almost darkly. I hang my head low and play with my fingers. “I know that was an irrational thought, but like I said, it just came and went. There was just something about the way she talked about the littlest things. It was like she put a special meaning in everything. She made every little thing have a meaning to the world—to her world.” I bite my lips. “Ultimately, she put a meaning to every little thing to my world as well.”

I close my eyes and inhale a deep breath, calming my sudden tense nerves. I look back up at my sister, sheepish. My eyes suddenly widen at the sight of her. A single tear drops from my sister’s eye. “Why are you crying?” I ask, alarmed.

She shakes her head, smiling brightly at me. “This is the first time I’ve seen you so vulnerable.” She whispers. “It’s so… pretty. You’ve never talked about anyone like this before.”

“Oh please, stop being such a big baby.” I reply, laughing awkwardly.

She wipes her eyes and laughs along, except her laugh is comfortable. “So, what happened after you caught your first snowflake?”

“I remember her—“

“Excuse me, sir?”

I turn around. I instantly bow down to the nurse. “Uh, yes?”

“Visiting hours will be over in a few minutes. Please say goodbye and you’ll be able to visit her again tomorrow.” She informs me.

“Oh!” I say, standing up from the bed. I check my watch. It’s almost nine at night. “I spent my whole day with you. You should feel special.” I tell my sister.

She rolls her eyes at me. “You love hanging out with me.”

My eyes suddenly tear up at her statement. She’s right. I do love hanging out with her. What am I going to do after she’s gone? Who am I going to spend countless times talking to after she’s gone? Who am I going to bicker around with after she’s gone? Where will I go?

Noticing my sudden tears, my little sister reaches out and squeezes my hand. “Hey,” She says softly. “I’m not leaving yet.”

I blink, trying to erase the tears away. “But you’re going to anyway.”

Sadness finally flashes in her bright brown eyes. She loses her sweet smile. “But not yet. You’ve been living in the states for two years, Jay. You’re finally back, back home. I’m not leaving just when you come back home.”

My throat clogs up and I look away. Her eyes are so hard to look at. They’re so clear. It’s so easy for me to see exactly what she’s feeling through her eyes. She makes it obvious. I let out an extensive sigh. I move closer and land a soft kiss on her forehead. “I love you. Don’t leave me just yet.” I whisper brokenly.

“I love you, too, Jay. I’m not going to leave you this early.” She murmurs.

I straighten up and start making my way towards the door, her hand slipping away from mine. Just before I leave the room, she adds, “Besides, I’m not leaving until I hear the rest of your snow experience.”

~O~O~

“Hi. I’m here to see my little sister.” I tell the nurse running the reception desk. She looks up from her computer, her glasses slightly falling off the bridge of her nose.

“Last name and room number, please.” She says, hovering her hands over the keyboard.

“Park and room number 412.”

“One moment, please.” She says, typing away. “Here she is! Ms.—Oh.”

“What is it?” I ask, bending over to see the computer.

The nurse bites her lip. She avoids my eyes as she stands up slowly. She takes off her glasses and stares at me right in the eyes. Her face suddenly looks sad. “Ms. Park… She...”

I cover my gaping mouth. Time seems to slow down. I didn’t think. I just ran. I run down the hallway, ignoring the nurse’s calls for me. I burst into my sister’s room, my heart expecting to see her there. My heart expected her small, weak body on the bed, waiting for me to come back and tell her the rest of my story. My heart expected to find her looking at me with her enormous, bright brown eyes greet me along with her sweet innocent smile.

It seems that my heart expected too much.

Nothing. Everything that proved my sister’s existence was gone. Her favorite purple jacket that she would always wear wasn’t hanging on the doorknob. Her ever-present drink wasn’t on the table. Her little stuffed toy wasn’t at the foot of the bed. Her favorite blanket of her favorite boy band wasn’t carefully folded on the couch. The sound of beeping that indicated that her heart was still beating isn’t ringing in my ears.

No. The silence is much worse.

With agonizing steps, I walk closer to the bed, touching the cold bland sheets. My knees suddenly give out and my tears finally surface. Every little thing my sister loved was gone, almost as if she was never in here. I grip the bed sheets, closing my eyes. I let the tears fall. What was worse? My sister isn’t here.

“I’m so sorry, sir. It must be really rough on you.” I hear that nurse’s voice say. She places a motherly hand on my shoulder.

“How did she leave?” I whisper, my voice just barely audible.

“Hmm? Oh, well we took her out and called her guardian. And—“

“No.” I shake my head, holding back the sobs. “How did she leave?”

The nurse was quiet for a moment. She sighs. “It wasn’t a painful death, I can tell you that. She passed away in her sleep.”

I squeeze my eyes shut tighter. This isn’t happening. My little sister didn’t pass away yet. She said she wasn’t going to leave me yet. I bury my face in my hands and tightly grip my hair. She wasn’t supposed to leave me yet…