“Close your eyes…”, Nana said, patiently putting some make up around Seungho’s eyes, finishing the last details for his mummy costume.

“You look y.”, she played, messing his hair up before wrapping more bandages around his head.

“Look at the mirror. Such a hot mummy!! Hahahahaa”, Nana laughed at how silly she could be. “What do you think?”, she asked, showing her boyfriend’s reflection in the mirror, expecting a compliment for her hard work.

“I hope doctor Kim won’t have any problems with me going as a mummy.”, Seungho said, ignoring  his girlfriends words.

“Doctor Kim?!”, she closed her expression. “I spent the whole day making up your costume and you say ‘Doctor Kim’?!”, she shouted.

“Well,i…”, Seungho replied, dumbfounded by Nana’a reaction.

“Well, you WHAT?”, she said bitterly, taking her coat from the bed and putting her make-up stuff back in her bag.

She walked to the living room, ready to leave.                                        

Nana was tired. It’s not that she didn’t love Seungho, it was just that she was tired of being taken for granted. She’d work hard every day to make him feel better about his disorders and stuff, but it felt like he was just taking it.

“Love is giving more than taking. You must give to take.”, she was told.

Thinking now, if Seungho wasn’t giving and just taking… maybe he didn’t love Nana. Maybe he was just comfortable with their situation.

“Nana! Please, that’s not it.”, Seungho came after her, it was difficult to walk with the thin wood and bandages she had put to make his legs stuck straight to make his costume more real.

“That’s not what?”, Nana had teary eyes. She was done with that. “I’m so tired!”, she cried. “I’ve been loving you, taking care of you and even fearing for you!”, she shouted. “But all you care about is doctor Kim!”, she yelled, tears falling from her eyes.

Seungho was speechless. He hated to see her crying for anything, let alone when he knew it was his fault.

He felt his heart aching. It felt like he had a thousand knives entering his heart, painfully cutting every inch of it.

“I didn’t mean to… “, he tried to speak but she didn’t let him.

“Save it!”, she said nervously. “I don’t wanna hear it.”, she completed.

“Nana, please!”, Seungho said softly, sadness evident in his voice. He was afraid. Like he hadn’t been in a long time.

Afraid of losing Nana for being insensitive about her feelings. Afraid of being lonely without her. Afraid of her leaving him.

And what was hurting him the most was the fact that it was all his fault. If Nana decided to leave him now and to never come back, it would be because Seungho hadn’t given her enough value. He took her for granted, not taking care of the love she fed for him.

“Love is a giving thing.”, he was told.

But he didn’t listen, did he?

When Seungho left his family’s house to enter a cooking school in Seul he had told his mother he’d find a nice girl and show off for his cousins. He’d take care of her, make her happy and he’d even marry her if they loved each other that much.

Right now he could only see how much of a bastard he was. Such a selfish man, just like his father, who had left the family to “find his treasure in life”, leaving a disappointed woman and the young Seunho behind. Some years later his mother had fallen in love again. A gentle man, with a big heart and a lot of love to give.

Seungho should had thought better. Seungho should had thought more about Nana, just like she thought about him.

He felt his heart aching again. The thought of becoming like his father and losing Nana because he didn’t take care of her was the worst pain he had felt since those bees.

“Nana, i…”, he tried again.

“SHUT IT!”, she yelled, crying hard. “I’m just… I’m done with it!! Ask Doctor Kim to come and live with you, spending her time and love to hear you say how much you care for other woman’s opinion more than to hers!”, she cried louder, her face red as a tomato, her tears washing her face.

“But i…”, Seungho whispered, he couldn’t speak. He was frozen. He was afraid. Afraid of being in the dark again, because without Nana that’s where he would be. In the dark, with nothing but his own fears to devour him.

Nana was destroyed.  Her heart was bleeding. It wasn’t just jealousy. She felt underrated, used and unvalued. 

She left the building, almost falling in the dark stairs, and took the blue car she had rent for her own vehicle being to the mechanic for  a check-up.

“Please, stay.”, Seungho finally said, his brain still not processing the fact Nana wasn’t there anymore.

Minutes had passed, maybe hours, and Seungho was still there, in the room, in the same position he was when Nana walked out the door.

He heard a scream, a female voice coming from the dark outside of his apartment. It was dangerous outside. It was late and it was almost Halloween. There would be people wanting to trick others everywhere.

Seungho moved his legs with difficulty. He took his wallet and cell phone and headed outside, following Nana’s steps, leaving the building to go after her.

He called doctor Kim to tell her he wasn’t going to the Halloween party she had prepared and, when he was about to call one of his mates to ask for a ride, his cell phone rang. It was Nana’s number.

“Nana?”, he yelled, expecting to hear from her that she was fine.

“I’m sorry… are you Teddy Bear Seungho?”, asked a male voice.

“Teddy Bear Sengho”, that’s his name on Nana’s agenda.

“Y-yes.”, was all he managed to say.

“I’m calling because there was an accident, a car crash, close to the park and Im Jinah was involved.”, said the man. “I called to the last number she had called… are you a relative or something?”, the man asked.

Seungho couldn’t breathe. His heart stopped beating and he felt his body getting heavier.

“Where… where is she?”, he finally asked, trying not to panic.

Seungho took a cab and headed to the park. He found the police officer who had found Nana, she was also still there, half conscious inside the blue damaged car.

“I’m so sorry!”, he cried, getting close to her, but not touching her. “I’m really sorry.. please, Nana… please, forgive me. Don’t leave me. I love you!”, his tears falling desperately.

Nana couldn’t say anything, she had no voice. She cried silently. She didn’t think it was his fault. She was a bit hurt because of him but it wasn’t his fault that she got involved in a car accident.

“I…”, she tried to say but it was painful to speak. She bit her lower lip to stop a curse from coming out. Seungho didn’t like when she cursed.

“Don’t say anything. You’ll be fine, I promise. I’ll take care of you, Nana. Just…. Just  don’t leave me alone. Please, don’t leave me…”, Seungho said fast, crying his soul out.

“I love you.”, Nana mouthed to him before slowly closing her red and puffy eyes.

“No,no,no,no…. please, Nana…” ,Seungho was desperate.

The ambulance arrived and the paramedics took Nana from the car, hurrying to the nearest hospital.

“She’ll be fine.”, they said, but Seungho didn’t believe until he saw Nana happily eating her chocolate pudim from the window grass.

He’d have to work hard to have her heart again.