!ÁChapter 3- Math class

Your P.O.V

I have math class now, but I don't want to go. I don't like Mr.Kim, he's mean, he's not what I think he is, I'm going to forget about him. I can't believe I wasted all these years of my life thinking about him, it's like he just showed his true colours. I'm going to stop crying, I don't care, he's not ideal, he's not my prince.

I wipe my tears and hastily get my books for math class, I'm already a few minutes late. I run to the classroom and knock on the classroom door, "Come in." I hear him say. I pull open the door and keep my head down low, disallowing my face to be exposed. 

"I just marked the roll, and you are late." Mr Kim states. I nod, you don't have to tell me, it's not like I don't know, tell me something new. "Joesonghamnida." I manage to quietly say, attempting to place my on my seat in the corner of the classroom. I can see him eyeing the roll with those mesmerising eyes of his, "Han Ka Eun right?" He asks. 

I nod. "Make sure you're not late, and I also hope you don't fall asleep in this class either. I will be checking your work at the end of the period so you better have achieved something decent." He sternly states. I can hear the students in the background whispering at each other and giggling under their breaths. I can't believe he would put me on the spot like that, scaring me once was enough and now he's humiliating me further. 

"Everyone, be quiet. I shouldn't be asking you to be quiet, I expected more from third year students. If you don't want to learn this period, you may go outside, I'm not here to force you into learning, school isn't for everyone, in fact I can already tell that some of you here aren't fit to obtain a good education." He moistens his lips and turns around, before writing the title on the board. 

We are all silenced. 

That last line of his was incredibly harsh, if I fail anything in this class or do bad, he will probably destroy us. Is this is alter ego? I don't remember him ever being this bad... my boyfriend... where is your character that I fell in love with? We made brief eye contact years ago, but I wonder if he still remembers?

"Lee Na Yeong, so if I place this value across to this side, what do I do next?" 

She stares at him as he fixes his eyes on her, they look cold, they look mean, they look scary. I stare at Na Yeong, she's a very pretty girl, and she hangs out with the so called 'popular' people of the school but sometimes when I see her, she still looks lonely. I don't even know why since she's so gorgeous, but maybe people don't like her. 

People don't like me either, but then again, I don't mind, as long as he's there.... no, he's different now. 

Poor girl, poor Na Young, she's being victimised by this handsome cruel teacher. "Joesonghamnida, I really don't know." The only reason why Mr. Kim put her on the spot is because he caught her whispering to her friends beside her. "Maybe if you listened, you'll understand. Who wants to assist her?" 

No one raises their hands. 

No one moves.

No one makes a sound. 

"I'm disappointed, my admiration for Mr. Gong is high, he's a great teacher, but I feel sorry for him. I don't understand how a great teacher would somehow have a pile of students who don't understand any content." He says. 

No, it's because everyone is intimidated by you. 

"So, no one at all?" He asks. He shifts his eyes across the classroom, waiting for someone to raise their hand. He has high expectations of us, if someone doesn't raise their hand to answer Na Young's initial question, he will probably judge our class intensely, and truth is, everyone around me aren't stupid either. Teachers shouldn't judge their students, and this man in front of me isn't my Kim sunbae, I'm sure I have mistaken from someone else.

I miraculously raise my hand as everyone turns to look at me. 

"Han Ka Eun, so what's your answer?" He intimidatingly says. I cough a bit and clear my throat, preparing myself to answer. My lips slightly part and I look around the classroom, the students aren't snickering at me like they usually do, but they look fearful with a tint of anticipation and faith in their eyes. 

"You just..." I pause, everyone is relying on me, and I'm not as shy as I was four years ago, but it doesn't mean I enjoy speaking out loud either. 

"Why did you stop?" Mr. Kim asks. I ignore him and immediately say my answer, "Substitute the previous values and factorise to solve." He smiles and his lips again, I don't know how many times he has done that, but his smile, it's so...I don't know, I'm attracted to it. 

"Thank you, Han Ka Eun. Now class, I believe none of you really understand the concepts to this method, so I will run through a few more examples." He says before turning back to the white board and scribbling down more numbers. His voice is clear, his voice is loud, his voice is easy to understand. I look around me and everyone seems to have brightened up after his clear explanation has solved all their queries. 

"I will now be setting exercises to complete. We have fourty minutes before the period ends, and you must complete at least four questions. In each question there are ten equations, the standard teacher's study plan states to do every second equation, but I want you to do all." 

I hear the class gasp. "This is the most basic thing in this topic, so you should be able to do it. I will be coming around to assist those in need, so raise your hand if you require my help. Get started, no one is leaving. I don't care if you need to attend next class, because it is your fault for not completing your work, not mine." 

Everyone nods and quickly opens their books, it's sad because I don't think anyone in this class likes Mr. Kim. It's his first day here but why is he leaving such a bad impression on the students? It's even worse for me. 

He sits at his desk peacefully and opens his laptop, probably planning this week's lessons. I unconsciously look at him, his hair colour never changed, it's still black as ever, but his hair isn't as long, but his side bangs and fringe is really thick. He definitely looks more mature, his fashion sense... he's wearing a suit buttoned up with a light blue dress shirt and red-washed tie. He stretches and turns to the side, I didn't notice this before because his bangs are so thick near his ears, but he's got ear piercings, he's wearinng three black studs in one ear but I can't see the other. 

Isn't he setting a bad example? Why does he have so many? Are male teachers even allowed to wear all these earrings in this school? Even so, he still looks really neat and tidy, and somewhat sophisticated. 

I still don't know his first name. 

Suddenly, he gets up from his seat and begins walking around the classroom with his hands in his pocket. The room is so quiet because of his scary aura, you can probably hear a pin drop, but at this instant the room is filled with the sound of Mr. Kim's foot steps. I look up for a bit to see him glancing at everyones' work in front of them. He places his finger on top of Na Young's page, "This is wrong." 

Everyone glances her direction. Mr Kim swallows and moistens his lips for the three hundredth time this period and glares at the whole class, "Focus on your own work, stop minding other people's business, remember what I said about not completing the set tasks." 

With that, everyone immediately fixes their eyes back onto their paper. Mr Kim signals Na Young to follow him, she picks up her chair and walks to the teacher's desk where there is more space. She looks frightened. I hear a couple of pages turning as Mr Kim decides to talk, except he's not raising his voice like he does all the time, but instead he's nearly whispering but in a gentle way. 

That side of him is back, the one I prefer. 

Ten minutes later, I hear Na Young's voice, she is thanking Mr. Kim before going back to her seat. Why does she look so happy this time? 

I stare at my paper, just one more question to go and I'm finished. I try to do the sub-questions as fast as I can, I'm not sure how long I can stay focused, attentive and awake anymore, I need to rest, but I may or may not get in trouble... actually I probably will. 

Just ten minutes left of class, I'm finished. Mr Kim isn't setting super high expectations, he's right, the equations aren't that difficult and neither does it take a long time to do one. I stretch as the joint of my arms crack, the room is still quiet as ever but no one dares to look towards the direction of the noise. No one will dare to divide their attention, not after what he said at least. 

I turn to the back of my book filled with doodles that I usually do in class when I'm bored. I feel like giggling at the things I drew, except I might get into immense trouble for making noise. I look at Mr Kim, he's sitting at his desk, completely oblivious to everything right now since he's so immersed into his own work. I pick up my mechanical pencil and start writing a list of things. 

MY YOUNGWOONG
My youngwoong (hero) is handsome, 
He is also gorgeous,
I love his smile,
And how those crooked bottom teeth of his looks,
It's not a set of perfect teeth but it's beautiful on him. 
He's caring, he's nice, he's friendly, he's silly, he's understanding. 
He isn't scary, 
I love his hair, and how it falls down on his face,
So silky, so soft. 
I miss him!

I look at my sheet of paper, I don't even know how I came up with that but that's a poem describing the youngwoong I have been seeking, and the youngwoong I have been thinking about for all these years. The youngwoong I will never forget. 

I feel a presence in front of me, my head is still low and my face is still concealed by my hair and thick frames. I glance around the classroom to see all students staring at me for some odd reason. I lift my head up slightly to see a pair of legs standing there in front of me, I look up a little more to see his suit. Mr Kim's teaching attire. 

"Han Ka Eun, I believe this is a math class so I shouldn't be seeing huge amounts of writing. Hand it over now." 

"Kim seong-sangnim I-" He interrupts me, "You have three choices. One, I'm contacting your parents." 
What? I already finished all my math exercises, "Two, you tear out that page and hand it to me, I may or may not read it out loud to the class." I stare at him apologetically and he smirks, "Or three, you read it out loud to the class." 

No! My parents are extremely strict and even if they are always not at home, if a teacher contacts them about my behaviour or academic record, when they come back home they will only be scolding me and we won't even have a proper conversation like normal family relationships, they're already distant enough. The third option isn't even an option because I would rather die. 

The second option... no! Mr Kim can't read this, he'll think I'm retarded! He said he may or may not read it out loud to the class, but will he? He's mean, but he still shows sides of 'him', my sunbae from years ago. 

"So, what is your option?" 

I trust him. I tear out the page and hand it over to him. He smirks and walks to the front where his desk is, "Students, are you ready to hear a nice piece of writing from a girl who is procrastinating in my class?" 

No way... no...just...