Jongin was sitting against Kyungsoo’s door outside his apartment sobbing quietly to himself. The couple next door was actually having a fight this time with the taller boy trying to actually the shorter one because he was drunk, but the shorter could only cry silent tears and pleading for the taller to stop. 

 

The beautiful girl had a crisis and the lesbian couple took her to the hospital, one of them spent the night with the girl. The short boy on the third floor slept with a girl he didn’t actually like and found out that he is in love with the beautiful girl above Kyungsoo’s apartment. 

 

 The father of the small family left without a second glace back to his wife and child, but the kid saw him and he cried himself to sleep. The brunet guy at his class actually confessed to the small one and it went really well, at that time they made love feeling like they are in heaven.

 

 The “us against the world” couple wasn’t really ok but the tall one was trying to calm the small one who cried crystal tears and he resulted to make love to him all night long. The girl sited behind Kyungsoo in class made the best portrait of him and hanged it on the wall facing her bed and also took a very important decision. 

 

The famous girl asked her boyfriend to break up because she was confused and Jongdae. Jongdae was dreaming about Kyungsoo and all the things he wanted them to be.

 

Christmas holidays passed really smooth and fast to Kyungsoo’s and Jongdae’s liking. They grew closer and did a lot of things together. Kyungsoo indeed didn’t see Jongin during the break.

 

It was the last night of their break and they were sitting to Jongdae’s apartment at the balcony drinking hot chocolate. Kyungsoo had all the objections in the world to stay out because it was cold outside and it was snowing and for God’s sake the temperature was -10 degrees, what normal person would like to stay outside with such a cold weather, but Jongdae had him agree or to Kyungsoo ’s point of view, forced him to stay out with him.

Kyungsoo couldn’t lie to himself, it was indeed beautiful outside. 

 

Snow falling slowly covering the trees and the top of the houses, small cute snowflakes dancing in the soft wind under the street lights, people walking fast to get home, breaths coming in pieces creating something to Kyungsoo looked like smoke, hot breath against cold wind vanishing in a mix of physic and Kyungsoo ’s fantasy.

 

 Kyungsoo could even detect a happy family at the opposite apartment, the kids were chasing each other and the parents were watching TV. It was beautiful but not so beautiful to make him change his mind. 

 

“Ha-ha” Jongdae ’s laugh broke the silence, Kyungsoo looked at him with a questioning expression. Jongdae was sitting beside him wearing only a jacket, cigarette on his one hand, snowflakes falling on his cigarette unconsciously going to their death, the light and the hit from it cutting on the peaceful atmosphere like knife, he would occasionally create circular shapes with smoke, Kyungsoo tried too with his breathe but he failed miserably. 

 

“You look cute” Jongdae said, a matter of factly tone to his voice “With all those jackets and blankets on you and the scarfs and that winter beanie on you head” he smiled warmly at him and Kyungsoo felt his temperature raising, the blood going to his cheeks making them a little flushed. 

 

“Tha-Thank you” he said shyly looking down and that was where Kyungsoo lost it. Jongdae dragged him and made him sit on his lap wrapping his hands around him. 

 

“Is it better now?” he asked softly and Kyungsoo blushed deep and nodded happy that the other boy couldn’t see his face through all the clothing. 

 

They spend most of the night like this, not really saying anything, staying in comfortable silence and watching how beautiful Seoul was at a snowing winter night like this, Kyungsoo daydreaming and Jongdae smoking his a cigarette.  

 

The next morning Kyungsoo ran for his class with all his might because he overslept. Walking to the cafeteria to find Jongdae he noticed somethings where different. The brunet tall boy was holding the shorter boy’s hand and they seemed really happy.

 

 Kyungsoo felt somehow happy himself at the view. The shorter guy spotted Kyungsoo and run to him stopping him before enter the cafeteria “Hey” he called and Kyungsoo turned back to look at him “Hey Are you – “ the boy stopped to catch his breath “Are you Kyungsoo?” he straighten looking at him with a wide smile. Kyungsoo nodded taken aback by this. 

 

“I’m Byun Beakhyun, and that tall guy over there is Park Chanyeol” the boy introduced himself extent a hand for Kyungsoo to shake and so Kyungsoo did “I’m Do Kyungsoo” he smiled. It was the first time someone actually talked to him to this university and from all the people around him those two were the last expected to. 

 

“I go for lunch my friend is waiting for me” Kyungsoo said half apologetically “May we come with you?” Kyungsoo nodded a bit too happy for his liking and Beakhyun gave a small chuckle.

 

On the table Jongdae was sitting waiting patiently for Kyungsoo when he saw him entering with two people holding hands looking a bit comical because the one was too tall and the other enough short around Kyungsoo ’s height, and Kyungsoo wasn’t the tallest man in the world not even normal, but he felt happy that he found new friends. They sat all together talking and laughing and after their classes finished they waved their goodbyes. 

 

Jongdae and Kyungsoo found out that Chanyeol and Beakhyun were a couple about three weeks now and that Chanyeol was taking this stupid class of economics only to stay near Beakhyun because in reality Chanyeol was majoring on Physics. But they were afraid to say it as they didn’t know how the two of them will react to this matter. The both didn’t mind a bit to have a gay couple with them the world could judge them as it wants, they would be there for them as friends.

 

They were sitting at the cafeteria one day when Beakhyun looked hard at Kyungsoo, Beakhyun ’s eyes seemed like he tried to collect his thoughts,

 

 “Hey Kyungsoo, there is that girl at our class, her name is No Eyoung, she is sitting behind you” Kyungsoo nodded signal for Beakhyun to go on “She is drawing beautifully you know, I don’t even know why she takes economics” he chuckled a little at the thought of Chanyeol taking this class only because of him.

 

“We have talked some times and she asked me if I could talk to you since we are friends now” he paused seemed to be thinking something “She wants to hmm – no. She asked me if I could ask you if you could go after class to the café near the university. She has something to tell you” Jongdae stiffed at those words knowing exactly what the girl wanted, he had seen her and she was indeed cute and beautiful and would make a matching couple with Kyungsoo but he half hoped that Kyungsoo would say no because after all there was something between them that no one could deny. 

 

“Okay” Kyungsoo answered with mouth full of food which made Chanyeol to crack up laughing making the whole room to look at him and Beakhyun facepalmed at his boyfriend’s stupidness. 

 

Indeed Kyungsoo went to the café and found the girl. It was easy to spot her. She was sitting at the back near the window and had a sketch book and a pencil on her hands, looking outside the window she seemed like she was drawing something. 

 

She was petite and small wearing a pink cute dress and a ribbon around the waist and her black hair was just above her chest falling in beautiful curls. She was stunning he couldn’t lie. Kyungsoo startled the poor girl but she laughed a little nodding for him to sit. They drunk bubble tea and hot chocolate and she ate a piece of cheese cake too. 

 

Kyungsoo learned a lot of things about her, that she liked to draw that she takes the economy class because she actually likes it, that she made a painting of Kyungsoo which she wanted to give it to him as Christmas present but then it hit her that she didn’t know his address, this one seemed sweet to Kyungsoo even though Eyoung thought he would be creeped out.

 

 

But she didn’t tell him that she had a load of painting of him back to her home. Kyungsoo learned that it took a lot of courage for Eyoung to talk to him and that she has a crush on him but he shouldn’t be afraid of it because she doesn’t actually confess to him and that Kyungsoo is something out of her league and probably he has a beautiful girlfriend and Kyungsoo being Kyungsoo said that he has no one but indeed is in love with someone and he befriend Eyoung. 

 

Kyungsoo also let her know that to his opinion she is way out of his league and she deserves someone as beautiful and kind as she is. And that part was true too. 

Weeks were passing by and the five of them were sitting together at the cafeteria going to movies, for dinner even to each other’s places for sleep over, play video games, watch dramas. 

 

  They found out that Chanyeol and Beakhyun could be pretty idiots and funny persons and that Beakhyun was the one keeping Chanyeol on track but also that Chanyeol was pretty serious and a smart person when the situation was calling for it. Jongdae said they are like Dumb and dumber. 

 

They found out that Eyoung was a pretty funny person and could be a very social and outgoing one once you knew her, that she liked video games and almost never lost to them something that was getting on Chanyeol often and had small fights about how Eyoung could kick his at any game without much effort but they all laughed in the end. 

 

They all found out how Kyungsoo could cook really delicious things and they went picnics at Sunday’s with Kyungsoo cook for them and Eyoung drawing them being stupid and later give them the painting. 

 

Jongdae was feeling happy for Kyungsoo. They found out that Kyungsoo and Jongdae are much intimated with each other for just friends and they all knew there was something more but no one dared to utter a word. If the two didn’t want to talk about it they weren’t in the place to do it for them. Eyoung though wanted from the depths of her heart for Kyungsoo and Jongdae to be together.

 

It wasn’t until April that it hit on Kyungsoo one day that he hadn’t see Jongin since the incident at Christmas. He maybe gave the cold shoulder on Jongin because he felt weird to be around him but he deeply cared about the boy and so he went and knocked on his door. And knocked. And knocked. But no one came out ,no noise came from the apartment and about two hours or so Jongdae found him outside Jongin ’s door 

 

“He is not here, he is still at his parents” Kyungsoo looked at him “This or he knows how to hide himself good enough”. 

 

Kyungsoo felt uneasy like it was his fault. Jongdae took him to his apartment and they sat on the balcony. He made hot tea for them and Kyungsoo thanked him with a small smile. Kyungsoo took a sip from his tea and Jongdae light up his cigarette. 

 

Jongdae watched Kyungsoo ’s every move. How his lips curved around the side of the cup and how his tongue his upper lip after he drank. Jongdae really wanted to claim those lips as his but if Kyungsoo wasn’t ready for any reason he would wait. He could wait an eternity. 

 

They sat there with Kyungsoo on Jongdae ’s lap. Jongdae hugging him softly, resting his chin at the crook of Kyungsoo ’s neck watching the city. 

 

 

“It’s getting warmer. Summer is just above the hills” said Kyungsoo and Jongdae nodded. 

 

“You know Kyungsoo”. 

 

“Huh?” Jongdae paused for a moment like he was trying to track his thoughts and say the right words.

 

 “Do you know why Jongin hasn’t return?” Kyungsoo shook his head “No, but I have a feeling it’s my fault”

 

 “It kind of is in a way” Jongdae said softly and Kyungsoo tensed up. Jongdae rub the small of his back to make him relax and when Kyungsoo was back to normal he light a cigarette and put Kyungsoo back to his chair both crossing their legs to the small table in front of them. 

 

 

“You know, Jongin. How to say it. Jongin is a heartbroken child” he took a sip from his cigarette making circles with the smoke he left from his mouth 

 

“Jongin is in love with you and I bet is like years now. And you, giving him the cold shoulder don’t help him a bit. He doesn’t know what to do for you to like him at least a little and I’m sure it hurts him too much.” 

 

Kyungsoo stared nowhere in particular, not being able to face Jongdae but that didn’t bother him to go on “Do you remember the Christmas incident?” Kyungsoo nodded signal for Jongdae to go on. 

 

“This was his break down. He couldn’t take it anymore I guess. I don’t know if he will come back but when he is back, try not to talk to him, If you can stay as far from him as possible. Jongin seemed to be crying that night and I bet it’s not the only night he did so. He seemed broken to no end. If he comes back the last thing he wants is to face you. I know you care about him in a weird way because;  you avoid him but if you really care then don’t go near him. Let him find himself” Kyungsoo nodded; there wasn’t anything he could say, the words were stuck at his tongue and couldn’t leave his mouth. 

 

 

 

It was May and the five of them were sitting at the cafeteria laughing at something Chanyeol said and Jongdae was holding Kyungsoo ’s hand under the table when the doors opened and a flushed guy ran inside, Kyungsoo knew this guy he was the feminine one, screaming for some Oh Sehun that he is a ing liar and he doesn't want to see him again in his life because apparently the guy named Sehun ed behind his back with a girl named Chaerin, and that Kris told him the whole truth, and running outside of the cafeteria with the tall guy who was always with him , Sehun his name they learned, running behind him screaming for Luhan to listen to him, which led Kyungsoo on thinking that the small feminine guy was Luhan and the tall thin one was Sehun, also to Kyungsoo the only familiar name was Kris because he was the boyfriend of the famous girl, talking about he hadn’t see them together in a long time. 

 

“They broke up” said in a matter of factly Jongdae taking a sip from his cigarette. It was like reading his thought which kind of creeped out Kyungsoo who looked at him with a confused expression. 

 

“Nana and Kris broke up” “Nana” Kyungsoo whispered “Nana is the famous girl. She broke up with Kris” Jongdae said, his grip on his cigarette harden for some reason.

 

“Oh~!” was the only thing Kyungsoo said feeling somehow sad for the two.

 

 “Which doesn’t seem like Kris is a bit sad about it, looks like he wanted for that to happen since he laid his eyes on that Luhan boy filling him with lies” said suddenly Beakhyun. 

 

“What do you mean?” Chanyeol questioned him right before Kyungsoo can open his mouth to ask the same thing. 

 

“You see – “ Eyoung started “It isn’t a secret that Kris is a big womanizer and not only a womanizer” Eyoung gave emphasis to the word woman 

 

“He would everything to his liking being girl or boy”she finished 

 

“That’s right, and it’s a common knowledge that those two were an “us against the world” couple and I can say Sehun had it hard with Luhan” said Beakhyun and the rest of them looked at him with questioning eyes 

 

“What guys? Didn’t you know they were a couple?”.

 

“That we knew” said Jongdae, and Kyungsoo felt like an idiot being the only one who didn’t know anything 

 

“Oh~ I get it. I mean Sehun was too in love with Luhan to even look at anything around him except him”. 

 

“Oh~” said Eyoung thinking about it and nod. “And what about Nana?” Kyungsoo asked curiosity written all over his face . 

 

“Oh! Nana? I don’t really know but I haven’t see her in the cafeteria or with her best friend in a long time. She usually sits alone at the big tree in the backyard” 

 

“Oh~” Kyungsoo said but that didn’t really answered his question.

 

Curiosity took the best of him and he decided to find Nana and learned what happened. Kyungsoo was amazed by himself but he found that he wanted to help those people. Walking to the backyard he found Sehun pleading and hugging a crying mess that should be Luhan, Kyungsoo couldn’t make out exactly from where he was standing. 

 

“I didn’t do it Luhan you have to believe me.  I never looked at anyone else since I found you more even to Chaerin” Kyungsoo make out that Sehun was crying and he found himself feeling sad for the two. 

 

“I’ll talk to them” heard a familiar voice behind him and two arms wrapping around his waist Jongdae ’s head resting on his shoulder. Kyungsoo smiled at him and ran to the backyard.

 

Jongdae indeed talked to the two of them told them that probably Kris had his eyes on Luhan, and who would blame him Luhan was a stunning person inside and outside, beauty out of this universe and an easy target on top of all. Jongdae found out, but the two of them were too blind seeing at each other to care about anyone else. 

 

Luhan apologized to Sehun and Jongdae asked them if they wanted to sit with them at the cafeteria. They entered the room with Luhan hide behind Sehun being embarrassed and Sehun holding on him for dear life.

 

In the meantime Kyungsoo indeed found Nana crying her eyes out. He slowly sat near her not knowing what to say, he had thought a lot about it but now he was there words were meaningless so he just stayed there in silence. 

 

That was until Nana break it “My real name is Im Jinah” he said between deep breaths 

 

“I made it Nana because it’s easier for people to remember me like that” Kyungsoo didn’t say a word 

 

“I hate the blond on my hair and I actually hate “Nana” I want to be Jinah again. I thought that maybe being popular would soothe some of my pain away but it’s all fake, once I go back at home nothing has changed.”

 

 She tried hard to keep herself together taking deep breaths “Actually you are the first to come here, and I don’t even know why I’m letting you all these but. But I feel I need to say it to someone, and you seem a pretty good listener” Kyungsoo didn’t say anything the whole time trying to avoid eye contact because it would be awkward; he listened to Nana and how she was confused of the feelings for her best friend and how she confessed to her but she started avoiding her, Chaerin later learned Kyungsoo was Nana’s friend. 

 

He learned about Kris and how he cheated on Nana many times and but the last time at Christmas Nana broke and she asked him to break up. Kyungsoo gave her a tissue and wiped her tears. 

 

Kyungsoo took her to their table where he found Chanyeol moving his hands animatedly in the air and saying one of his stories, Beakhyun facepalming for what should be the up tenth time Jongdae actually laughing at Chanyeol ’s story, Eyoung eating her food trying to avoid Chanyeol’ s hands, Luhan chuckling at Chanyeol with puffy eyes, Kyungsoo thought should be from all the tears he shed before and Sehun hold him around his waist with his one hand, like he would lose him if he doesn’t hold him, and eating with his other, giving a look to Beakhyun something between “I kind of know how that feels” ,“Don’t worry he is actually funny” and “How can you put up with him”.

 

Later they all learned about Nana and what happened but no one learned about everything because that was only for Kyungsoo to know and the world to never learn. They also learn about the straggles that Luhan had back in China, oh yes they learned he was Chinese too, and that coming to Korea didn’t make it better and that was until he found Sehun, who run away from home because he apparently hated everyone for reasons no one dared to ask because only Luhan had the right to know, and then was that they became inseparable and that was 5 years ago and it was indeed them against the world.

Summer was around the corner and Kyungsoo still hadn’t see Jongin. 

 

They were discussing about what to do for the summer break. 

 

Nana changed her hair to flame red something she always liked and now everyone was calling her Jinah, she also bought Eyoung a tone of new clothes because she claimed Eyoung should be in style. Beakhyun said that he was planning to go to his grandparents for the summer and Chanyeol said he’ll go too. 

 

Jinah said she’ll take Eyoung to camping near the beach because Eyoung loved the sea but she wasn’t able to go since she was young. Eyoung and Jinah really built a good friendship. Sehun and Luhan said they haven’t thought about it but one thing was sure that they would spend summer away from Seoul. This left Kyungsoo and Jongdae alone for the summer which Jongdae didn’t mind at all.

 

It was the first days of June and they sat at Jongdae ’s balcony hugging and watching the town. Kyungsoo thought that the balcony thing kind of became a habit for them. 

 

“What do you want to do at summer break, you know it’s just around the corner we need to prepare for that” Kyungsoo turn and looked at him with questioning eyes 

 

“We?” Jongdae smiled at the question like it was the most obvious thing on the world that they’ll spend the break together. 

 

“Of course we. Aren’t we going to spend the break together?” Kyungsoo ’s heart skipped a bit, maybe it was the opportunity to be with Jongdae finally, he nodded 

 

“Good, so what do you want to do?” Kyungsoo thought a little and then answered “I haven’t think of anything you know.” 

 

“It’s ok . I have think of a lot of things to do.” Jongdae smiled one of the smiles that could leave Kyungsoo breathless 

 

“We can go camping, or we can go to a travel around the countryside. Or we can go to my summer house near the sea. Do you like the sea Kyungsoo?” Kyungsoo ’s eyes shined more than the stars at the mention of the sea. Kyungsoo loved the sea. 

 

“Yes I like it” he said a little too much happiness in his voice and Jongdae smiled to him and smiled a little wider to himself 

 

“Okay then we will go there”. 

 

They sat in silence until Kyungsoo broke it “Jongin isn’t back yet” he said looking worried 

 

“And he probably won’t come back. At least not anytime soon” said Jongdae and Kyungsoo ’s face fell a little 

 

“There are a lot of things you don’t know Kyungsoo, things you may never cared to learn” Kyungsoo looked at him like a child who asks for answers. 

 

Jongdae left a deep sigh, he lighted up a cigarette, took a few sips and start explain things to Kyungsoo “I told you about Jongin right” and Kyungsoo nodded even though it wasn’t a question “The couple near you – “

 

“Couple?” Kyungsoo asked taken aback by the word couple “Yes they are couple they aren’t roommates”  

 

“Oh! I see”.

 

“Their names is Cho Kyuhyun and Lee Sungmin, age 24 and 26 each” Kyungsoo 's lips formed in an “O” shape “Kyuhyun is the tall one and Sungmin the short blond one” Kyungsoo nodded he had see them both Sungmin the most but he never talked to him 

 

“Did you ever wonder what are the noises you hear from time to time at nights?” 

 

Kyungsoo thought a little before answer him “Are they fighting?”

 

“No they are not.”

 

“Then?”

 

“They’re just having , getting wild at it” Kyungsoo blushed at the thought. “Have you wonder why the noses stopped all of the sudden?” Jongdae asked and Kyungsoo blushed a little before answering 

 

“At the beginning I thought they stopped fighting but… Did they stop having ?”

 

“No”

 

“Then what happened?”

 

“At Christmas night happened a lot of things I learned about them from time to time, you didn’t because you never actually asked, and that was the main reason you were alone all these years” Kyungsoo felt bad about what Jongdae told him. 

 

It was the truth thought.

 

“Kyuhyun returned home drunk and that night they actually had a fight, he tried to Sungmin. The next morning he left, Sungmin hasn’t go out of his home since then. He’s been left alone and he had gave up everything for Kyuhyun.” 

 

Kyungsoo felt sadder about it “Don’t be sad though, Sungmin is a strong person he’ll put himself back together and he will go on but maybe he’ll take him sometime to do so. You don’t throw 6 years in the trash like that”. 

 

“I see” was all Kyungsoo could say.

 

“The girl above you; her name is Tiffany she is 23 years old” 

 

“I know her, she is beautiful” Kyungsoo said blushing a little by thinking he had a small crush on her. 

 

“Beauty can’t give you life though”

 

“What do you mean?” Kyungsoo didn’t really know if he wanted to how at this point but he still asked anyway.

 

“She is sick, and she’ll die, she hasn’t got more than three years to live”. Kyungsoo felt his heart drop to his stomach. 

 

“She tried to talk to you sometimes but you ran away”. 

 

Kyungsoo lost his words “I was – I had a crush on her that time around and I was shy” Jongdae smiled at the thought “She is in love with the short boy 3 floors beneath you. Minseok his name he is 22 years old” 

 

“Oh~”

 

“She is not going to tell him though since she’s going to die there is not point” he went one “She had a crisis at Christmas the couple of girls right beneath your apartment took her to hospital” he took a deep breath “She went many times to the hospital after that day, more than normal. The girls are always by her side since that day”. 

 

Kyungsoo looked sad and he wanted to curl into a ball and disappear from the world.

 

 “The girls are a lesbian couple that ran away from their families, Jungah and Jooyeon their names 26 and 25 each”. 

 

“They looked like good friends” said Kyungsoo thinking about the girls, they were beautiful and really looked like friends. 

 

“That is because they had a difficult past. They taught how to disguise themselves to look like friends” Jongdae answered him

 

“The boy who lives beneath you, his name is Jongdae. He is I –. He likes to spend his time with a small boy with big eyes who doesn’t know a lot of things about the world named Kyungsoo” Kyungsoo smiled at what Jongdae said and moved closer and Jongdae hugged him. 

 

Sleep took over Kyungsoo, head resting on Jongdae’s shoulder. Jongdae took him to his bed not wanting to wake him up. 

 

Kyungsoo never learned why Jongdae told him all of this but something inside him changed. 

 

The next morning Kyungsoo woke up to the smell of eggs, bacon and rice. 

 

He slowly opened his eyes taking in his surroundings and he felt surprise not waking up on his bed but he assumed that he should have fall asleep and Jongdae didn’t want to wake him up. 

 

They eat talk and spent the day together.