Chaerin's eyes were closed, she felt the morning air brushing against her cheek. She felt his arms tighten around her. 

"Release me", she murmured, leaning her head against his. 

"If I do, you'll be gone." He knew. He knew that she would take one more step and disappear before his very eyes. He needed to anchor her down and make her realize she was important, needed.

"Please, Jay. Can't you understand?" She opened her eyes, looking at him.

Jay looked back, his eyes filled with sadness. Chaerin knew it was her fault for causing it.

"I understand. I understand the feeling of being hated, judged, ridiculed and wanting to just end it all. But do you really think no one would cry over you? Do you really think that only CL matters? 2NE1 looks for CL as a leader yes but the girls looks for Chaerin as the sister they can lean on, depend on. Your family, Chaerin. Think about them too. Where has your passion gone?" He pleaded with her, his eyes searching for something but whatever it was he clearly didn't find it.

"That's true. But I am selfish, Jay. All I want is love, I crave for it. Don't you understand?" Chaerin looked at him seriously.

She waved her hands around as if to help better explain, "All of this is not enough. I need more, want more. I'm blinded by my need for love. Not even my family or my girls can compensate for that. How can I feel better when knowing when I go onstage the only people watching me are the antis. How can I feel the best when everyone sees me as the worst? Tell me. My passion?"

Chaerin laughed bitterly, "My passion has crashed and burned. Oh how I love music, dance. Oh how I love it all. But it pains me when I do it, Jay. It pains me and burns me. How can I have my passion when everyone is telling me I don't have passion for music, for dancing, for goddamn anything."

Jay looked at the girl trembling in his arm. Jay and Chaerin both knew each other for a long time, years in fact. And have bonded closer when Jay came back to Korea, as a solo. When he started visiting YG since Lydia and Mina were often there, Jay started talking to her more and there friendship was made since then. Jay understood the pain, the suffering of antis. He knew her pain, understood better than anyone else.

"Make a song with me." He whispered in her ears. And Chaerin blinked, confused.

"Did you not hear what I just said?" She said slowly, as if he was stupid.

"Yes I did. But instead of making music as CL, come to me as Chaerin. I want that raw passion. The rap filled with everything you're feeling. I want it all. I don't need the perfect, baddest CL. I want the flawed, angry Chaerin." He squeezed her tightly, smiling at her. "You'll see this will help."

"How?" Looking at him as if held all the answers.

"Baby, it's going to be a diss rap. We'll show all those motherers who we are. Who we will always be. They can't tear us down." He kissed her forehead.

She closed her eyes once more.

"Fine I will. Just this once I'll listen to you. But Jay?" Chaerin said softly.

"Yes?" He watched her, entranced by how beautiful she was as the sun hit her face softly.

"Will you stay by my side. Will you support me." She clutched his shirt tightly in her fists.

"Chaerin, I will stay by your side. I will support you. I understand what you're going through and I know you will get through this. I will be here, even when you don't want me to be." He said, his voice thick with emotion.

Chaerin nodded. Jay then lead her off the edge of the building. 

"Anyways shall I take you to your dorm? Or do you want to go the studios. I was going to visit Jiyong-ah and I think Gonzo is already with him. Heard they are making a song with Tablo Hyung." He said as they walked down the stairs of the building.

"Mm, okay." Chaerin was hoping with all her might that Teddy wouldn't be there. He was just the one person she didn't really want to see at the moment.

_______________________

A/N: Is this chapter messy? I wanted to try adding a person outside of YG. I felt that Jay Park would be fitting character, no? I want there relationship to be more than friends and less then lovers idk how to explain it but I hope you all liked it. I know you all wanted GD but idk i felt that was to cliche and expected. Anyway I didn't proof read this. It's 4:15 in the morning and asdf.

By the way the inspiration of this chapter was helped by a friend of mine so she's like a co-author?
thank you, r0cknr0lla. My chingu ~

Thank you for waiting guys! I know I take forever. Thank you for the comments, messages and wall posts! I love you guys!

Please comment and subscribe.