I looked out the window having sudden interest on the sceneries outside. It’s raining hard and I really found the rain, trees and leaves interesting than what my Physics teacher’s talking about.

I watched the nearest tree outside our classroom window. The leaves never fell off even though the rain was pouting heavily. They hold tight to their branches knowing that if they ever loosen their grip, their lives will gradually end the moment they gave up.

I admired those leaves; they faced many obstacles and difficulties... Heavy rains and winds, but they tried their best to be strong and not to fall off.

I sighed.

I should have learned a thing or two from those leaves. I should have held to him and never let go. But I was such a weakling and a fool. I was having my own dimension when I felt someone nudged at my side. I looked at my seatmate, who was my best friend. She was looking at me with concern; I smiled at her indicating that I was fine.

“Were you thinking of him again?” she whispered to me as low as her voice can be, we didn’t want to be caught talking to class.

“I was not.” I simply lied to her. I looked away and turned my gaze outside.

I didn’t like lying to her but I didn’t like her to know that I was sulking because of that guy again. But I think I was really a bad liar because she always saw through my lies and knew what I really felt even though I had my expressionless face flaunting in front of her. She can just read me like an open book. I can never hide anything from her.

“If you said so.” I heard her whispered.

I, of course, knew that she just said that without even believing the words I said.

After that she didn’t talk to me and listened to the whole discussion. I was thankful that she hasn’t asked another question related to what I felt towards him.

After a few moments, the bell rang, indicating that the class was finally over and it was time for their lunch break.

I closed my book that I doesn’t paid attention to, grabbed my other things and carefully stuffed those in my bag.

My best friend hooked her arm on my other arm as we excited the classroom. She lightly tugged me towards the school’s cafeteria.

“Sohee, walk faster. We need to go there fast or we will have a hard time finding a table or worse the delicious food will be gone.”

I shook my head. “We will not run out of food so slow down a bit, Sunmi.”

We talked while we walked slowly towards the cafeteria. She was blabbing about some gossips animatedly. I was listening to her and gave her answers as ‘Oh, really?’ ‘Omo!’ ‘When did that happen?’ ‘Uh-huh.’ and some sorts of short replies just so she knew that I was listening to her. I knew she was just doing all of those to help me wandered my thoughts on something else other than the obvious one. And I really, really appreciated what she was doing. It kinda helped, to be very honest. Even though it was only for a few minutes but at least, he was out of my mind.

As we arrived at the cafeteria, there were many people and the line for ordering the food was long already.

We got a table from the far corner of the cafeteria where we usually seat. I told her what I wanted to eat and she went to the line to order our food.

I got my phone as I wanted to play a game while waiting for her to come back. I had slide the screen and typed the password, it was his birthday. My wallpaper greeted me, it was our picture together. I was looking straight at the camera and had a sweet smile while he was not. He had his arm around my shoulder, pulling me closely to him as he planted a kiss to my cheek.

Pathetic wasn’t I? I should have tried forgetting him instead of holding onto our memories. I should change my password and wallpaper. Seeing our photos won’t exactly be good for me since I will only remember him and end hurting myself.

So for that I decided to change my wallpaper but not my password. Then I returned my phone inside my bag; dismissing my earlier idea to play a game.

I was looking on no one in particular when I heard a name that caught my attention. The whole cafeteria that was already buzzing became silent when five guys decided to present their mere presence in the cafeteria.

Girls suddenly became more cognizant. They straighten their uniforms, checked themselves on their hand mirrors, reapplied lip glosses, and fixed their hairs to make them more presentable and prettier just in case one of the godly handsome guys might land their eyes to some lucky girls.

“Oh my! They are eating here again.”

“Oppas are so perfect. I might faint.”

“Jaejoong oppa is so handsome.”

“Yunho oppa is so freaking y!”

“Yoochun oppa, can you be my boyfriend?”

“What should we do? Junsu oppa is so cute.”

“No way! Changmin oppa is cuter.”

“We are so lucky to have such handsome guys here in our school.”

I heard those whispers near me.

It was an everyday site here. Whenever the girls saw the five or even one of them, girls were crazily tried their best to get their attention; they were trying to be close to them, literally. It was a major commotion to be honest. There were quite pushing just to have a glance and be closer to the five sinfully gorgeous guys here in our academy. But they kept it quiet as possible.

It was also scary from the bystanders and sane ones point of views. It was like predators trying to get their prey as quietly as possible. But of course they never dared pushed, pulled or even touched the five guys; they still had a little bit of sanity and decency to leave enough space for them to walk comfortably.

I just stared at them while they were walking to their table that not too far from me. That table was specially theirs; even though they rarely eat here in the cafeteria they had their spot of course. Nobody sit there but them.

When they were on their table, Yoochun looked and smiled at me. He was a good friend and he was the closest one to me when his hyung and I were still in good terms. I smiled back and gave him a slight nod.

I turned to look at the guy beside Yoochun; I was startled because he was looking directly at me with his beautiful brown orbs. I didn’t know what he was thinking at that moment because he had a poker face and his eyes; the stare he was giving was as cold as an ice, I can’t see any emotion there.

“Jae.” I whispered still looking at him.

He was the first one who looked away and broke our little staring moment.  I smiled bitterly. What do I expected, that he’ll smiled at me even though for a second? I should never expect so much from him.

Sigh. All I can do at that moment was to sigh.  It was a good thing that Sumni already arrived with our food so I had a companion to talk to. Or so I thought it was a good thing.

“I saw it.” It was she said when she just got seated.

“You saw what?” I played as if I didn’t know what she was talking about.

“Your little staring moment with Mr. Popular Kim. Jae. Joong.”

“Did you really need to emphasize his name?” I propped both of elbows on the table and rested my cheeks on both of my palms. “And Sunmi-ah, I told you to not say his name anymore.”

“Jaejoong, Jaejoong, Jaejoong, Jaejoong, Jaejoong, Jaejoong.”

I glared at her. “Yah!!! Really, Sunmi? Are you that bored? How could you repeat his name couple of times?” If she was not my best friend, I really, really, kicked her a long time ago. How could she? Aish jinjja.

“You don’t want to hear his name but he’s been running, floating and wandering in your mind the whole day. Don’t even try to deny it, Sohee; I’m your best friend and I knew you like the back of my hands.”

I kept silent because what she have said were true.

“You’re hurting yourself, why can’t you just move on? Forget him and start anew. There are so many boys out there that will love you more than he did. Look at him right now,” she turned around and nodded at his direction, “Just look at him, Sohee.”

I did. He was with his friends happily talking to each other. He had a smile plastered to his face looking all cheery.

“Seems like he had move on or he was just a good actor. But the point is, he’s not jammed to the past and he’s not drowning in the ocean full of sadness just because you two broke up. At least he’s trying to be happy. If he can be like that, why can’t you? It was not entirely your fault why things happened, if he really loved you he wouldn’t done that.”

I was walking my way back home and what my best friend said keeps replaying on my mind. She had a point. She really had. Why can’t I just forget him and move on? It’s not the end of the world if he’s not here beside me, was it? But it’s easier said than done. I swear, I was trying hard to do that but he was stuck in my heart and mind. I needed time… everything heals at the right time. But I couldn’t help but think that if I had listened to him and be courageous enough, would he still be mine?

I opened the door of my apartment and my little puppy greeted me. “Arang, did you miss me?” I lifted her and proceeded to my room. “I had a boring day at school…”

Arang was his gift on our 100^th day together. I still remembered that day with him

“Oppa, where are you dragging me at this time of the day? What if someone will see us together? This is not that far to our school.” It just been an hour since our classes ended and time like this there were still many students roaming around the street. Even though we were not wearing our school’s uniforms, anyone from our school will know who he was. And they’ll be dead curious of who was beside him and holding his hands like couples does.

“Why are you so scared to be seen with me?” Was that hurt I heard on his voice? “Aren’t you proud that you have a handsome boyfriend like me?” He half-jokingly asked.

Tsk.  Why do I have a narcissist as a boyfriend?

“It’s our 100 days together, just for today forget about everything. Don’t think about other people. Let’s just enjoy this day together.”

“Fine. Since you dragged me here, why not enjoy myself with my handsome boyfriend, right?”

“That’s right!”

“So my handsome boyfriend, where in Seoul are you planning to take me for our special day?” We’ve been walking for some time now and at this time there’s really lots of people here, not that I’m complaining but does he planned to make the whole CheongDam-Dong, his own fashion runway? “Do you have any plan, Jae? We’ve been walking for a while now.”

“Babe, don’t be impatient. Of course, I have a plan for us today. But walking is a good exercise so we’ll just walk for a while plus I got to show you to everyone.” He raised our intertwined hands. “Since we can’t do this at school, at least here I can freely hold your hand and be a normal couple not in that secret relationship.”

“I’m not a thing you have to show around, Jae.” I knew that was not he meant but he sounded like he owns me and had the entire right to show me to everyone.

“Of course babe, you’re not a thing I own. How can I own you when it’s the other way around? You know you hold my heart babe.” he lovingly said to me.

“Jae baby, you’re dae to the bak in fluttering my heart. Your heart is safe with me, I chained it already so it won’t go anywhere without me. But stop being so cheesy it’s giving me chills.” What did I do in my past life that I so deserved to have him in my life? I probably have saved a country.

He grinned and pinched my cheek, “I know you love it when I say sweet things to you.”

Who wouldn’t? Tell me who wouldn’t love to hear those words from the one they love? When he was telling me how important I was to him or how I held his heart, it was like angels were singing right through my ears.

We entered a café, Coffee Cojjee to have our light snack. There were many people since the café was famous and its owner was a famous artist, Hero from TVXQ. We seated to the far corner of the café where there was a vacant table.

After some time, we went to Banpo Hangang Park to see the show at Banpo Bridge Rainbow Fountain. The fountain was famous for its dancing, rainbow-colored jets of water in the air in synchronization with music. There were many couples like us waiting for the show to start; we seated on the grass, my head on his shoulder while his arm was around me, we patiently waited for the show to start.

The next day he texted me early in the morning telling me to check my door, I did; I found a puppy in a basket on my doorstep with an accompanied letter to it.

A smile appeared to my lips while I slightly shook my head, Jaejoong oppa is such a sweet talker.

I carefully carried the basket inside my apartment.  I stared at the sleeping puppy inside, thinking what I should name her; “From now on, your name is Arang.”  I saw the box he was talking about; I opened it and saw a bracelet inside. Its chains were heart shaped and there was a heart that was slightly big than the others, it had small diamonds in it. It was so beautiful and looking at it, I can already tell that it’s not cheap. “Babo Jaejoong! He really don’t have to give me this, a cheap one will do. But it’s really pretty.”