Made this chapter while playing 2NE1's I Love You on repeat.

Chapter 11 : I Love You.

Yoona.

“Sit down, Yoong.” He asked me to sit, and I did. Tears brimmed in my eyes. Those tears were going to fall anytime soon.

Seunghyun sat next to me, and tapped his broad shoulder. “Just let it out.”

And when I heard his words, tears started to fall from my eyes.  I buried my face on his shoulder and cried so hard.

It was just like the old days, when he—the cold guy—calmed me—the talkative woman—with his silence and comfort. He usually just tapped his shoulder, let me lean on it and let me cry as much as I want. In the past, he just soothed me, rubbed my back or kissed my forehead to calm me down. No words at all. But those were enough for me. His actions always succeed to calm me down.

Today, there were 2 reasons for my tears. The first one was my argument with Jiyong before. Of course, we had arguments before, but this was the worst. Maybe I was being sensitive, I didn’t know. But it quickly disappeared when I spend time with Yoojung and Seunghyun—we just walking around the hospital and talking with Yoojung. When I heard Yoojung’s mother’s words, it somehow broke me apart. She reminded us how we suppose to have a 3 year old son.

xxx

I remembered it clearly, the day when my period was late for a week and half already. It happened at our 8th month as spouses. We decided to wait a year or so until we are ready for add another member in our family, and holy God, my late period scared the out of me.

That day, I bought several test packs and went home nervously after work.

To cut the story short, I did the tests, and while waiting for the results, I questioned myself ‘Am I ready? Am I ready to responsible for another life beside mine and Seunghyun’s? Are we ready to start a family?’

And when the results came out, I screamed in my head, ‘We have to be ready!’ because all the results showed that… I was indeed pregnant.

When I told him the great news, his reaction was… amazing.

“Hey Oppa,” we were snuggling in bed when I told him the news. Seunghyun, who had worked in hospital for 14 hours that day, just replied me with a simple hum. But he hugged me tighter. “I'm pregnant.”

His half closed eyes were wide opened in lightning speed, and he stared at me in shock. “Yoong, are you kidding me?”

He looked really shocked. “No, Oppa.” I said as I kissed his lips quickly. I looked straight in his eyes, looking for his further reaction.

But what I saw was his stiffened body, opened mouth, and shocked expression. He didn’t seem happy at all. Me, who was very sensitive because of pregnancy, quickly assumed that my pregnancy wasn’t supposed to happen.

I did assume that he wasn’t happy about my pregnancy.

Because… yeah. We are both busy, will we have time for kids?

“Oppa, are you mad?” I asked sadly. In spite of the sudden and unplanned pregnancy, I must admit that I was really happy.

He shook his head and got up from the bed. “Mad? Are you kidding me?” He helped me up and carried me in his strong arms. “I'M SO HAPPY, YOONA! I'M GOING TO BE A FATHER!” He said happily as he swung my body in his arms. I giggled and showered kisses all over his face.

“Kiddo, we’re waiting for you.” He said as he put me down on the bed. His warm hands rubbed my lower stomach. “Be healthy and grow nicely in Mommy’s tummy, will you?”

My pregnancy was a smooth one. Well, beside those annoying morning sickness—even though Seunghyun is a doctor himself, he was very terrified and worried about my morning sickness. He said, it scared the of him out—, weird cravings—he DID be patient with my weird cravings in the middle of the night. There was one time when I craved Egg Benedict at 3 a.m. and he made (forced is a more suitable word, perhaps) Hyeyoon-unnie make it for me for the sake of my happiness, and the very unbearable mood swings.

Our families were also overjoyed with the news of our pregnancy. Our parents were really excited to have another grandchild. Our nieces and nephews were dancing in happiness to welcome another playmate. Our siblings… well... They scared us with ‘how tired parenting is’ and etc, but we couldn’t be afraid. We were expecting one, so, why have to be afraid before experiencing yourself?

He also never missed my check ups. Of course, we didn’t go to Jaejoong-oppa—a senior of mine in high school and Seunghyun’s good friend who is gynecologist (OH GOD, IT WILL BE SO FREAKING AWKWARD!)—and went to other gynecologist.

There was a memory I really treasured during my pregnancy called his brightest smile.

Really, I never saw his brightest smile before the day we figured out the baby’s gender—okay, he did smile before, but that day, I saw his BRIGHTEST smile.

The baby was boy. And he was perfectly healthy.

We were very grateful that the baby was healthy and the fact that the baby was boy was overwhelming news for us. Seunghyun never said that, but he always wanted a son. I knew it since the early weeks of my pregnancy.

But at the 6th month of my pregnancy, that freaking accident took our baby away from us.

“Where are you?” Seunghyun called me in the middle of the night. His voice sounded so worried. I was on my way back to the office with Jieun, Seungri and Yeeun—Seungri’s secretary. “It’s late already. Just go home.”

I laughed. My watch just moved to the number of 10, and I never thought that 10 p.m. is late. “Come on Oppa. It’s just 10 p.m. It’s not late.”

“But you’re pregnant Yoong. You can’t over work yourself.”

“I’m not.” Jieun and Yeeun glanced at me who was sitting at the backseat. They looked at me with envy. “Don’t worry. Besides, I have Jieun, Seungri and Yeeun who can help me whenever I need their help.”

“Still…”

“Don’t worry.” I caressed my baby bump lovingly as I spoke to him. “Now I’m on my way back to the office to take my bag, then I’ll go straight to home. Okay?”

“Just go home safely, okay? Somehow I have uneasy feeling tonight.”

“Aigoo, don’t worrying me too much.” Seungri—who was driving—stuck his tongue out in disgust to me. I ignored his mocking and kept talking to Seunghyun. “I love you. Don’t be worry, okay?”

“Okay…” Seunghyun said in the other line of the phone.

But before I could hang up the phone, there was a car coming straight to ours. Seungri quickly hit the brake, but it didn’t help.

The last thing I knew, Seungri was trying so hard to stop the car, Jieun and Yeeun were screaming, and I lost the grip of my cell phone. I instantly hugged myself—specifically, around my swollen belly, trying to protect my baby.

The sound of my fallen cell phone also told Seunghyun that was something happened with me.

“Yoong? Can you hear me? Yoong?” He began to frantically screaming in the other line of the phone. “YOONG! WHAT HAPPENED? YOONG! ANSWER ME!”

But I didn’t answer his call.

Yeah, that was the story of how we lost our baby. That freaking car accident just ruined everything.

And the driver who crashed our car—did I tell you already he was DRUNK when the accident happen?—got his deserved punishment. But being the over protective husband Seunghyun was, he didn’t satisfied with the court’s decision. But he couldn’t do anything. He had his family connection, but his father—a high rank military officer—didn’t let him to punish the driver even more.

Luckily, beside the car, there was no real damage done. Seungri broke his left leg, Jieun and Yeeun got bruised and stitch all over, but they were fine. None of them lost their consciousness when that accident happened.

But I did.

I opened my eyes slowly. My eyes felt really heavy. And the first sound I heard was a familiar voice in my ears. The deep and husky voice of a man I love. “Yoona-ah?”

“Seunghyun-oppa?” He was the first person I saw when I opened my eyes. His eyes showed great amount of worry. His hands grabbed my hand gently—like I was a glass doll that can be broken anytime soon.