Luhan never meant to become a singer. He was just a foreign exchange student.

When the casting agent scouted him on the streets of Myungdong, he had thought it would be funny to audition.

But he actually made it in.

His first day as a trainee started off with a young boy with big eyes. He looked shy and scared, so Luhan decided to introduce himself first.

The boy’s name was Kyungsoo, and he turned out to be a loyal friend. Luhan could always count on him to be there for anything.

The first time Luhan realized this was when his first letter had come from home. He could no longer visit his family during vacation, and it had been months since he had last seen them. He had hidden himself in his room and had been crying for what seemed like hours when the door opened.

He had stood up hastily, wiping the tears from his cheeks, and looked up to see Kyungsoo standing in front of him.

Before Luhan could say anything, Kyungsoo had stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Luhan, pulling the elder in close. Luhan closed his eyes and allowed himself to float in Kyungsoo’s arms.

There weren’t any questions asked afterwards, not even about when Luhan finally worked up the nerve to lean forward and kiss Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo hadn’t responded, and Luhan had been left to fight the crushing sense of disappointment in his chest.

Later, Luhan would see videos of Kyungsoo with Suho, and with Kai.

Luhan would turn off his computer, pulling his knees to his chest, staring into the darkness, rocking himself to sleep, willing himself to forget.