The letter sat limp on my lap with its unopened contexts weighing me down into my seat. In Young sat beside me as we both stared down at it when she took my hand and placed it over the envelope, “Open it, Kyungsoo. What are you waiting for?”

“You open it for me.” I handed In Young the letter and she pushed it back to me, “Kyungsoo, you have to do it.”

I already knew the contexts of this memo. The denial was oozing between the seams and dripping onto my hands as I held it in my hands. I knew better than to think of the positive because the optimistic things in life rarely ever came to me. With In Young as the only exception.

With a sigh I took the top tab of the envelope and ripped it off taking out the single paper that was waiting to be read.

And it went like this:

Dear Do Kyungsoo,

We are very sorry to inform you that your admission into our school has been put onto our waiting list…

I read no further after that.

I didn’t have too.

The rest was just to add a fake cushion to those that believed the waiting list meant hope.

I already knew that it meant rejection.

In Young immediately snatched the paper from my hands and read over the same words I did but gasped at the news and stared at me as I remained indifferent.

Rejection no longer pained me like it used to. It was only a slight hit to the arm that would slowly die away as time went on.

“Kyungsoo, I’m so sorry.” She continued to look at me while I stared at the paper in her hands.

I wanted to burn it and forget that I ever even tried.

“You don’t have to be sorry.” I stood up and took the paper from her, balling it in my hands and tossing it in the trash.

Some would think I was being an right now, but I was merely taking hurt the way I normally did. In silence. In a calm matter that seemed to annoy most people than anything. I would let out my frustrations and anger another way when I wasn’t in the presence of In Young.

I went back to where she was sitting and noticed she too had stood up and was putting on her jacket, “Let’s take a walk.”

We walked together in a large park filled with running children and happy couples. To be honest, this was the last place I wanted to be.

I didn’t need the mockery of other peoples’ happiness to be rubbed in my face. I just wanted to be alone and bask in my own misery for a while. I had both my hands in my jacket pockets when I felt In Young slip her arm around mine, “Cheer up, Kyungsoo shi. Things could be a lot worse.”

“Tell me then what could be worse than what I’m feeling now.”

“You could be lying on your death bed taking your final breaths, you could be in the hospital diagnosed with cancer, and you could be like me a few months ago sitting over a toilet puking…”

“Okay, I get it.”  I stopped her when I peered over at her as she continued to smile, “What am I supposed to do? Where am I supposed to go?”

I asked her when she stopped walking and looked at me, “Kyungsoo do you believe in God?”

Where does religion have to come into this? I looked at her and saw she was looking off somewhere else, “I guess so?”

She nodded her head and directed us in another direction as she continued to talk, “Do believe that things happen for a reason? Do you believe in fate?”

“I guess so, but  what does this have to do with-“

“Let me finish and then you can ask me questions okay?” She placed her finger at me lips and laughed before she took her finger away and held my hand as we continued on our walk, “Maybe you not getting into that school is trying to tell you something. Maybe there is something out there that is better fitted for you because maybe what you think you want isn’t really want you need.”

“Huh?” I was utterly confused at the words that In Young was speaking when she stopped in front of a building and pointed at it. The building was a highly upscale school that had the words school of the arts plastered at the end of the school’s name. She pulled me inside and continued with her story, “I haven’t told my dad yet but I plan on enrolling here. I already told Kai and he’s all for it actually. So just maybe…You were meant to enroll here with me?”

I stopped her and turned her to me as I stared at the school shaking my head, “How did you possibly come to that conclusion?”

I was smiling at her when she took hold of both my hands and swung them side to side, “A little thing called fate told me.”

“And what else has this fate told you?” I asked as we walked around the campus of the school when she started to giggle.

“It’s told me a lot of things and even brought me a few pleasant surprises.”

“Oh really, and what are those?”

“Oh nothing really, just my friends...Family…And this guy…” She twirled around a bit as we continued to hold hands when I grew curious at her last ‘surprise’.

“A guy?” I said more to myself but of course In Young heard me and turned around to see my sour facial expression.

“Yes, and he’s the most precious person that I’ve ever met!” She walked closer to me and laughed, “Do you wanna know who it is?”

“Not really, I’ve had enough bad news for today.” I shook my head with a slight pout on my lips when she bursted out laughing.

I let go of her hand and stormed off in a more teasing matter when she started to call for me with a slight panicked tone to her voice, “Kyungsoo! Wait!”

I continued to walk off but slowed my pace when I felt her collide into my back and wrap her arms around me, “What? Don’t you want to go to your precious guy?”

“I already have him you pabo.” In Young let me go and turned me around as she shyly looked at me before coming up on her tippy toes to meet my face and swiftly kissed my cheek before mumbling, “It’s you stupid. I like you.”

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Sorry for not updating yesterdays T.T

My baby died...When I say that I mean my computer and I can't use it till next week TT.TT

You: But wait! Aren't you using one now?

Why yes I am but it's my parents and I don't like...My computer was completely fitted for my asian/kpop/ needs while this is just ehhhh

I want my baby back!!

haha

Also I've been watching fancams of EXO in london and the video of Lay trolling Chen and Kris haha

he is so funny haha

EXO fans are crazy and tbh came a little too close to EXO haha to me at least...Not that I don't appreciate the close ups and all but come on guys they need space too

It's like you can see up his nose O.O

OMG the dude is protecting Yeol haha

I'd do that too ^^

AHH I talk type too much hehe until next time ^^