Chapter 12 – Your Dream, I'll Make It Mine

Seohyun’s peaceful dreams were disturbed by the loud, male voice. She didn’t recognize the voice but it sounded urgent. She didn’t want to wake up but the man seemed to really want to get her attention. When she finally opened her eyes, she jumped back immediately. There he was, the man she wished was hers, soundly sleeping in close proximity. His head was resting on hers, with his arm wrapped around her keeping her in place. It was no wonder why she felt so warm and comfortable throughout the trip.  While she was a little upset that he was trying to pull his erted tricks on her while she was asleep, she couldn’t help but smile when she remembered she spent an hour sleeping with him like that.

“Excuse me! Hey, lovebirds! This is the last stop, wake up before I ditch you guys and lock you in the bus for the night,” the same voice ordered. Seohyun finally made sense of her surroundings and realized the old bus driver was angry at them for not getting off the bus in time. With a quick nudge to Yonghwa’s ribs she startled him out of his deep sleep.

“Yah, what’s your deal? I’m trying to sleep,” he mumbled closing his eyes and turning away from her. Another jab to the ribs made him jump once more, this time with an angry expression on his face. “Oh my god, do you want to die? Let me sleep.”

“Dummy, wake up, we reached the last stop. We have to get off the bus or the driver is going to leave us locked inside here.”

“Ugh, fine,” he whined, finally getting up from the seat and walking towards the door. Seohyun followed right behind him and after a quick thank you to the driver they headed back towards home.

“Did you have fun today Seohyun? I know I did. If only there had been more hours in the day. Once we win that contest though, we can do this all the time. I know I would never get tired of that place,” Yonghwa said, letting lose a content sigh.

“Yeah, it was fun. I haven’t had that much fun in a while. Thanks for taking me there. Things have been rather boring lately, I really needed something like that to let loose,” she replied, not bothering to look at his face in fear that she would begin to blush. Too bad her efforts were of no use with the action Yonghwa took next.  She was startled by the feel of something warm gripping her had. Of course she knew what it was but she didn’t even want to bother confirming it.

“I know it’s weird, but we have to do this right don’t we?” Seohyun threw him a look that asked what he was talking about. “Well we were mistaken by a couple by who knows how many people. We entered a contest reserved for only couples. We did things that two people do on a date. We might as well finish the day with this right,” he said while pointing to their interlocked hands.

“Um, are you sure this is right? I mean, you do have a girlfriend and this feels really wrong,” she pointed out. “Ahhhhh why is he holding my hand? I want to let go but this is a dream come true. I’m sorry Ye Ji unnie, I’ve wronged you so much today, I promise I will make up for it in the future.”

“We’re just playing around right? No harm between friends,” he said with a smile on his face. “So Miss Seohyun, how did it feel to go on a date with me today?”

“First of all we didn’t go on a ‘date’. Second, it was fun, not because you were there but because I really like amusement parks.”

“Psh, liar. If only I had a coat, then I could drape it around you like they do in all the movies and dramas. It’s pretty cliché but, it would be the cherry on top,” he joked. Seohyun wished he would stop saying things like that. Sure she was completely ecstatic that this was happening, but it was wrong and sadly, wasn’t real. Those thoughts almost brought her mood down, but this was too much of a once in a lifetime opportunity for her to throw it all away.

Once they reached the gate to their apartment building, after much trouble she freed her hand from his and decided that it was finally the end to the perfect day. It was saddening to think that she would have to avoid him from now on, but she told herself she would be fine with the memories and pictures she secretly took.

“Well here we are, home sweet home. There’s only one thing left to do on our ‘date’ before we go our separate ways. We have to kiss and then your parents come out and try to kill me. I guess in your case it will be your sister Taeyeon. Quick call her out and plant a big one on me. Right here,” he said pointing to his pouted lips.

“No way, I’m not an easy girl. You aren’t getting anything out of me on the first date Jung Yonghwa. We aren’t even dating. Do you even hear yourself talk half of the time? Some of the stuff you say doesn’t even make sense. I hope you don’t pull this on other girls. You have Ye Ji unnie to think about,” she protested. Yonghwa’s goofy expression dropped on mention of Ye Ji. Normally guys would be happy to hear about their girlfriends, Seohyun thought it was strange that every time Ye Ji was mentioned, Yonghwa reacted negatively.

“It was a joke, don’t get your in a bunch. I’m not a player like you say I am. Anyways, so this is our last moment as a couple. I guess we are going to break up now?” he laughed.

Seohyun’s playful expression dropped at that moment also. Even though Yonghwa was joking, he was right. This was the end of them. She would have to see him still at school, that was unavoidable. She couldn’t remain friends with him anymore though. It would make things too hard on her, she liked him too much. Their interaction at school would only make her like him more, and she didn’t want to hurt Ye Ji’s feelings.

“Yeah,” she managed to respond in a shaky voice. “I guess this is the end. It was fun while it lasted right? I guess we should break up now. Remember Yonghwa, I’m dumping you,” she tried to finish with a joke. With a cough and a fake laugh she tried to drown out a sob, luckily Yonghwa was as dense as ever and didn’t catch her sorrow.

“Alright, I’ll be the bad guy in this. Just don’t tell anyone I cheated on you,” he teased with a wink. “At least we can still be friends right?” he said continuing the joke.

“Yeah, friends…” Seohyun began but decided to not continue speaking, or else she would risk her true feelings coming out at the moment. After a small, but comfortable, silence, it was time to bid each other farewell.  It’s not as if she was going to go somewhere far away for a long time or anything, but she was going to try to make it seem like that.

Seohyun was about to open , but was cut off by Yonghwa grabbing her arm and pulling her towards his door. She knew she couldn’t keep stalling for time, it would only make her doubt her decision more. Seohyun surprised Yonghwa when she abruptly pulled her arm back and turned her back to him.

“What are you doing? You have to come here for a second, there’s one last thing for tonight then you can go, I promise.”

“I thought we just broke up, there’s nothing to else to do in your house. You’re pulling something funny aren’t you?”

“No, the guys are in there. Even if they weren’t you already know I wouldn’t do anything like that. I’m not actually as bad as you think I am. It’s all in your head. Seriously though, there’s one more thing left for tonight.”

“Um, okay,” she hesitantly replied. “Let me just get home then. I haven’t called the girls all day and they’re probably worried that I didn’t come home at 3pm like I usually do. I’ll text you when I’m coming down.

“Alright, I’ll be waiting,” he finished with a smile before disappearing behind his door.

“You really are an idiot aren’t you Yonghwa? Here I am ready to cut off from you and you somehow manage to tie me back into contact with you. I guess that’s what I get for liking you so much.” She was thrown into deep thought on her way up the stairs to her apartment, she didn’t even realize when she entered the door. A few seconds later, a storm of running footsteps could be heard coming towards her.

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“Seo Joohyun! Where have you been young lady? We have been worried sick about you all day. What happened all day? We called you like 50 times but every time the answering machine would tell us that your phone was off,” Taeyeon scolded in a mother-like manner.

“Jeez, thanks for worrying mom,” Seohyun responded sarcastically.

“Yah, is that any way to treat people who worried about you? We only worried so much because the guys downstairs called us early in the morning to tell us you were in a car accident,” the blond grump of the house explained.

“Oh, that. I’m fine, don’t worry about me. I came out of that one without even a scratch. Although Yong oppa got a really nasty scrape on his arm and a small fracture in his wrist from saving me,” Seohyun stated with a small look of worry on her face. “He’s going to be fine though.”

Sooyoung spit out the cereal and milk that was in , while Taeyeon and Jessica seemed to choke on some of their spit upon hearing Seohyun’s explanation.

“YONG OPPA?!” Seohyun then proceeded to give herself the biggest facepalm of her life. “Damn it, did I really just call him Yong oppa? I knew I shouldn’t have called him that in that dream last night…”

“Omo, what happened, we need all the details. He must have done something huge if he got our little Seohyun to call a guy oppa,” the big eater of the house demanded.

“Well I almost got hit by a car this morning. I think I fainted for a second due to the shock I received before the accident, but it seems that Yong opp- I mean Yonghwa jumped in the way and pushed me to the ground. I don’t know how he did it but he managed to keep me from getting hurt at all and he got his hand pretty banged up. I took him to the hospital near campus since he didn’t know where to go.”

“Wow, so he risked his life for you? Oh my god, did you pay him back for his favor with you know…” Sooyoung ertedly asked, adding a little wink, eliciting a punch from the blond girl sitting next to her. “Sooyoung is that all you think about? We all knew you liked , I didn’t know it was to this extent.”

“No unnie I didn’t do anything with him. Then afterwards we went to the amusement park to cheer us up and we ended up staying there the whole day.”

“So how was it?” Taeyeon straightforwardly asked.

“Well it was alright,” Seohyun lied, unfortunately for her all that got her was three questioning stares that all knew she was bullting. “Okay okay fine, we had a lot of fun. We rode rides, we took pictures, we even entered a couples only contest,” Seohyun finished with a sparkle in her eyes.

“Seohyun, why did you do that? Isn’t he already taken? Look, I might not be your mom, but as the oldest one here it is my responsibility to keep you from doing stupid things,” Taeyeon said worriedly. “I promised your parents that I would be responsible and keep you from getting into trouble. As much as you may like him, you can’t do that sort of stuff.”

“I know,” she dejectedly agreed. “I feel terrible about it, but I can’t help it Taeyeon unnie. I really like him. I can’t tell myself to not like him because it just doesn’t work. I know you’re worried about me but I can handle this myself. I already made up my mind to not be friends with him anymore. It will be too hard for me to clearly draw the lines while he acts so good to me like he did today.”

“Are you sure you want to do that? That sure is going a little too far. If he is as good of a friend to you as you say he is, he definitely won’t agree to it. You’re a beautiful, smart, and amazing girl, I’m sure he wouldn’t want to lose a friend like that.”

“I know Taeyeon unnie, but it has to be done. I don’t want to become someone who gets in between two people who love each other. For me to avoid that, I have to do this.”

“Alright well since you’re cutting off from him completely, there will be no harm in a little ‘going away’ gift for him right? I’m sure he would gladly accept it,” Sooyoung started up again, giving her signature ert wink.

“Unnie, I feel bad for your future husband, he better have some amazing stamina or else you are going to wear that poor man out,” Seohyun joked trying to get rid of the solemn atmosphere.

“Alright, like we said we won’t get in your business but please don’t do anything without a lot of thought into it,” Taeyeon finished, reaching over to give Seohyun a hug. The sisterly moment was ruined by a noise coming from Seohyun’s purse, indicating a call from a certain someone.

“Speaking of the devil,” Sooyoung said while peeking into Seohyun’s purse. “Hello? Oh hello Yonghwa-shi. You want to talk to Seohyun? Oh, okay then I’ll make sure she will be down in two minutes. Mhmm, good night.”

“Why the heck did you just answer my phone? I was ready to cut him off for good, why did you tell him I was going down?”

“You didn’t properly say goodbye. Just go down there and finish everything up. It won’t hurt to have a conversation amongst friends. It’s not like you’re going to do anything to him. Or are you…?”

“Seohyun are you really not going to go? If you’re going to do this, you might as well do it right. Go and say bye to him. Trust me, you’ll regret not having said bye later if you are serious about this,” Taeyeon stated in an all-knowing tone.

“Fine, I’ll go. If things get worse or if I change my mind I blame all of you.”

“Why the hell am I getting blamed for this? It’s not my fault you’re taking advice from that old lady and Soo over there. If you’re going to be a homewrecker, blame it on them not me,” the ice princess yelled from across the room.

“Yah!” Sooyoung and Taeyeon both yelled. Seohyun thought it was probably a good idea to get going before she was forced to choose a side in the argument. “I’ll see you guys in a bit, I won’t be long.” Before heading out the door she heard Sooyoung asking her to ‘at least take the handcuffs’ and Jessica make another comment on how much of a homewrecker she was. It was times like those that she was glad she had such a variety of sisters to help her through her problems.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________

“Heeeeeeeeeeey, if it isn’t our favorite sister-in-law,” Minhyuk happily greeted. “Comon inside, hyung is in his room waiting for you. Don’t be too loud you guys, the walls are paper thin in these apartments.”

For a minute Seohyun wanted to ask if he had been hanging out with her sister Sooyoung. Then she realized that he lived with one of the biggest erts on the block. On her short walk to the room in the far back, she tried to figure out why in the world he had called her out to his house. After a soft knock on the door she walked in to a familiar, guitar-covered room.

“Ah, so good of you to join me your majesty. I have been waiting for your arrival, would you like anything to drink?”

“God you’re a dork. Anyways why did you call me out here tonight? It’s late, I’m tired and I want to go to sleep.” Once again she realized she was being rather cold, but if she treated Yonghwa like a friend, there was no way she was going to be able to cut off from him any time soon.

“Damn is that any way to treat your ex-boyfriend who cared for you for all these years?”

“We never dated, and I hardly count today as ‘all these years’.”

“Cranky much? Have you been hanging out with that grouchy sister of yours? Seems like it. Anyways, I called you here because of this,” he said pulling out a smashed guitar from his closet. “It looks like it’s in pretty bad shape. The car probably ran it over when I pushed you out of the way.”

“Oh my god, what will I do now? The performance is in three weeks and I barely even know how to play the basics. How am I supposed to continue practice before then if I have no guitar. More importantly, Jinwoon is going to kill me.”

“I’m sure he will understand, he seems like a reasonable guy. As for the guitar problem, I can help you out with that.” Seohyun stared at him as he walked over towards the guitar hanging above the picture of his sister.

“He isn’t… it couldn’t be…” was all she could think about at that moment. Every inch his arm moved as it reached for the guitar seemed like a mile.  Finally, after what felt like an eternity, he took the instrument off the wall and headed towards her.

“Here, I want you to have this. I never use it anymore so I think it will benefit you more than it benefits me,” he said while holding it out for her to accept. She couldn’t accept it, she knew the story behind it. It was far too special for a person like her to accept it. If anyone deserved something like this, it was Ye Ji, or at least in her mind. Seohyun couldn’t believe that of all people, she was the once receiving this from him.

“Yonghwa… I, I can’t accept this,” she stuttered. She couldn’t let him know that she knew the story behind it or else he would feel betrayed by his brothers and her. “I can get a guitar another way, there’s no need for you to give me a something like this.”

“Nah, like I said this thing is just going to sit there gathering dust, I’d rather it be with you. I hate to see something like this go to waste just mounted up on that wall. Besides, you definitely will play much better on this guitar. It was as if it was made for you,” he responded with a smile on his face. It wasn’t his usual smile. It was a smile he only showed to his sister, a smile he hadn’t used in years.

“…” Seohyun didn’t know what to say. She was trapped. She had no reason to say no other than the fact she knew the significance of that instrument for him. A gift was something she would have taken from a friend with gratitude, especially something that would help her succeed in her performance, but that was just too much.

“Do you have time? I want to talk to you about something. You can sit down if you want, it’ll be kind of long. I promise I’ll let you get to your beloved sleep soon.” He went over and grabbed the picture off his desk with a smile and shoved it in her face.

“This girl is my sister Kyeong Eun. I’m sure you guys would have been great friends if you had met,” Yonghwa began. Seohyun’s eyes proceeded to open as wide as they could. She realized he was telling her the same story that Jungshin had told her a few weeks back. It was heartbreaking the first time she heard it. She wasn’t sure if she would be able to stop herself from crying, when she was hearing the words come out of his mouth.

“She was my best friend, and I loved her a lot, probably even more than I loved my parents at the time. She was always there for me, and I was glad that she was my sister. You remind me a lot of her, you know. She would always ignore my jokes and cocky comments just like you do.”

“Why do you talk about her in the past?” Seohyun asked, feigning ignorance at the situation.

“That stupid girl decided it was a good idea to leave me a few years back,” he explained with a bittersweet smile gracing his features. “She got a spot at a prestigious music academy here in Seoul and decided to take the offer in order to further her career. She loved music and the only thing on her mind was to use that love of music in order to help our family live a better life. She was the one who introduced me to music and if it weren’t for he,r I wouldn’t have ever found my natural talent for it.”

“Oh so she left you back alone in Busan? She was just doing it to help…”

“No,” he quickly cut her off. “She left to somewhere where she would never come back from. That stupid girl left my family and me without our permission, and without even a word.” The melancholy tone in his voice was enough to make Seohyun’s eyes water. She knew she couldn’t cry, it would give it all away. She wanted to fly across that room and just wrap her arms around him for the rest of the night.

“That same night, we were walking back and she told me that she bought me a present, something I would really love. It was this old thing right here,” he continued as he gave the guitar a small tap. “This little guy named ‘Dream.’ It was my first guitar ever, it was what got me to where I am now. I can’t even bring myself to play it anymore. I’ve only ever played one song on this thing. Every other time I try, I feel like Kyeong Eun is in the room watching me play, and after one strum I just breakdown.”

“Yonghwa… you can stop now, please just stop,” Seohyun pleaded. He wasn’t crying, nor was he even putting on a sad face while he told the story. She couldn’t bear to hear more. Every breath she took, every sound she heard, each brought her one stop closer to crying her heart out.

“I know it’s too late for me to start using it. It’s just too painful to even give this old thing a strum. That’s why I want you to have it. I know you will put it to good use. I don’t want Kyeong Eun’s last memory to be painful. I know you can make every sound that comes out of that guitar a happy sound, something that will make me want to cry tears of joy, not tears of sorrow.”

“Do you really believe in me that much? I can’t take this from you? Are you out of your mind? This guitar is the last memory you have of your sister, me taking it would be like stomping all over those memories,” Seohyun protested. “If anyone deserves to have this it is Ye Ji, not me. She is the one who can truly make you happy; please, if you’re going to give it away to someone it has to be her.”

“Seohyun, I…”

“Yonghwa, I won’t back down from this. I can’t accept it, please just give it to Ye…”

“SHUT UP! Stop mentioning her,” Yonghwa yelled. Seohyun could only stare back at him with astonishment. She never thought that she would ever hear Yonghwa raise his voice at her. What confused her more was the fact that he was asking her to stop mentioning someone he should be happy to hear about.

“Stop mentioning her name. All of today you mentioned her over and over. Why do you always have to be so nice and considerate of her? Did you not hear what Ye Ji said this morning? She accused us of cheating on her. I may be her boyfriend but that doesn’t mean that I’m not allowed to have other friends. Whoever I want to give my guitar to is my business, not hers,” he angrily explained.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you would react like that. I just feel really guilty because I am trespassing in your relationship with her,” Seohyun replied, not being able to bring herself to look at him in the eyes.

“Don’t be, the relationship isn’t as good as you think it is,” he quickly responded. “Hanging out with you today I realized more and more that Ye Ji isn’t really what she’s cracked up to be. I know that sounds terrible on my part but it is how I truly feel. When I’m with you I feel happy and like there’s nothing else more important than enjoying that happiness. Ye Ji is…” he trailed off.

“Ye Ji unnie is what? Look Yonghwa, I’m flattered that you think of me as a good friend, but please let’s stop this. This conversation is steering into uncomfortable territory that I would rather not be in,” Seohyun demanded. His words would get to her eventually. Delusions would start forming in her head, and she knew it. It didn’t matter if he was just saying that out of friendship or if there was something more, but her heart wouldn’t care. As long her heart heard those words, it would only make the attraction to him stronger.

“Ever since Ye Ji came back, things haven’t been the same. I still like her, but when I really look back, she has been nothing but trouble. Kyeong Eun, my parents, and even Shin Hye always warned me about her but I was too much of a naïve teenager to take their advice. The guys all warned me before getting back together with her, but I was happy to have something from my past back into my life that wasn’t a painful memory. Sadly, the painful memories disappeared only to be replaced by a hellish present,” he continued.

Seohyun could hear her rapid heartbeat in her ears. She told herself she was hearing things, making things up that she wanted to hear. There was no way that Yonghwa was confessing to her that he wanted to leave Ye Ji. Her perception of their perfect relationship was shattered. She had to get out of there. The more and more she heard from him, the more the hope that one day she could be with him grew inside her heart.

“I don’t even know why I accepted her so fast. She left me in the worst time possible. She left me for four years, on the day that my sister died. I lost the two people in the world I cared about more than myself on the same night. Did Ye Ji bother calling me during those four years? Did Ye Ji bother hearing my grief-filled songs when I was alone during all those sleepless nights?”

“Yonghwa…” Seohyun had nothing to say. She couldn’t even think of something comforting to say to him. She felt completely useless.

“She was always a controlling person. I thought that being with her would bring me nothing but happiness. Even back then, all we ever did was things she wanted. I used to think her happiness would become mine, so i gave into doing whatever she wanted. If I ever did something she didn’t like I would be reprimanded for it and would have to beg for forgiveness.”

“But, hehe, I shouldn’t be saying these things,” Yonghwa said, trying to fake a laugh. He wiped his eyes a bit with his sleeve, and turned his attention back to the guitar. “Don’t make me go through more sappy explanations, just accept it and go.”

Seohyun took the guitar from his outstretched hand and felt a strange sense of familiarity. It didn’t feel like the guitar that Jinwoon gave her to practice with. She was grateful for Jinwoon’s gift but his guitar felt awkward and clumsy in her hands. Yonghwa’s felt just right, as if it were made for her to use. She didn’t even have to think twice about where to put her hands to play a chord, they moved there on their own as if it were a reflex. After a quick strum, she turned her eyes back to the heartbroken boy she loved.

“Thanks Yonghwa, I know this means a lot to you. Now your sister’s dream will become mine. I promise that I will put this to good use and won’t disappoint you.  I will guard this with my life, if I have to, I will die before it gets damaged,” she smiled with confidence.

“Yeah, don’t hurt it. If you do, Kyeong Eun will come back and haunt me. I know she would be happy to know that you are going to put it to good use. Remember that’s my heart you’re holding in your hands. I trust you with it from now on, so take good care of it.”

With that last statement she froze once more. Did he have to put it in that way? Every time Yonghwa opened his mouth she regretted having come back to him after finally deciding to cut all ties with him.  His words made the doubts she had in her head bigger and bigger.

“Oh, and remember there’s only three weeks left until the show, I’m sure with your talent and that special guitar you can play anything now, but… Do you even have a song picked out yet?” After seeing her shake her head in response he began to dig through a large stack of papers in his desk drawer. After a quick search he dug out a small packet and handed it to her.

“Here, this song should be enough. Since you speak English pretty well it should boost your performance score. It’s a simple song, but the fact that it’s in another language should get you brownie points. I think it will be an easy song for someone like you to master before the big day,” he explained, shoving the papers into her arms.

“What song is it? Hmm… ‘What’s Up.’ I’ve never heard the song but I guess if you say that it’s good enough I’ll try it out. I’ll look it up when I get home and get to practicing right away. Thank you so much for the guitar and the song, I won’t let you down.”

“As long as you do your best I don’t care. And don’t mention it, what are besties for?” he asked jokingly, putting his arm around her with a huge smile on his face.

“Yeah, friends…” she trailed off, thinking about how much she would hurt him after tomorrow. “We’ll thanks a ton for everything. Bye.”

“Mhm, no problem. See you at school tomorrow.”

“I hate you Jung Yonghwa. You’re such an idiot. Do you not realize what you’re doing? Every little thing you do makes me like you more,” she told herself while taking another admiring glance at the guitar. “You bad guy, you’re only making things harder for the both of us…”

Author’s Note: Another long one here for you guys. Once I get started on these things, I just can’t stop myself. They went from being 5-6 pages my first chapter now they’re up to 8-9 pages. The big day for Seohyun is coming up, be ready for it :D . Another chapter without the stupid witch we all hate, and it feels so good to have her out of the picture, unfortunately she has to come back eventually. I’m sure you will enjoy a few upcoming scenes with her however, ;P.

p.s. for those of you who don’t remember/ don’t watch YongSeo (which you should) here is the song that Yonghwa gave her to sing:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Am8eYgwJ46A

(Youtube thought it was a good idea to remove my epic quality video so I replaced it with the closes thing I found. She starts playing at around 1:05. Sorry it's ty quality and not subbed. Damn it youtube I hate chu!!!)

It was the song he asked her to sing right after he bought her a guitar for her to play and she gets it pretty well despite being busy with promotions with SNSD.