Kris

Just my luck. If being her neighbor wasn’t bad enough, I had to be her desk mate as well. I didn’t believe in fate, but now, I was certain that it existed. And that it wanted me to suffer, slowly and painfully until I eventually became crazy. At this rate, it wouldn’t take long at all.

I stared pointedly straight ahead, ignoring all her attempts at introductions and conversations. I could feel the burning gaze of her eyes, but I didn't back down. I couldn't back down.

Come on Kris, remember Mei Ting. She suffered and you didn’t do anything to help her. Once was more than enough pain to last a lifetime. I can’t lose someone precious to me again. I can’t be useless, again.

A piece of paper suddenly flew in my field of vision and landed gracefully on top of my notebook. I looked to my right, face already hardened, ready to attack.

All my defenses fell as I met her eyes, mesmerized in their depth and beauty. It couldn’t be possible, their likeness to Mei’s, but here I was, falling into her gaze. My eyes traveled lower, noticing a small scar on her right cheek. I cocked my head, mind whirling as I followed its faded line. I felt my hand reaching out, acting on its own accord, fingers twitching slightly in an attempt to obtain contact.

Her smile faltered as she registered my actions, recoiling back into her chair, as if she were afraid of the sudden intensity I displayed. I felt my eyes watering the more I looked into her eyes. It can’t be possible. It’s not possible.

As quickly as the note flew to me, her body whipped around to face back forward, concentrating once more on the work before her. She didn’t look at me for the rest of the day. 

As for me, I slipped the piece of paper under the desk, reading it under the safe covering of the table. With each word, I could feel the coldness disappearing, withering away under an unknown source of heat. My heart clenched, constricting tightly in my chest. It was painful , almost, being able to feel after so many months of numbness, of dark nothingness. But that was the beauty of it.

Yoo Nara

Relief washed over me as the bell rang, signaling the end of the school day. The past few hours had been in a sense, unbearable. I could see Kris watching me from the corner or his eye, brow furrowed in either frustration or pain. His gaze had unnerved me, his eyes penetrating my own, as if he were staring deeply into my soul. 

That was the thing that scared me the most. I didn’t want people to know about my problems. It was easier that way, for them and for me.

Slinging my bag over my shoulder, I attempted to bolt out of the classroom before he could catch me again. I thought I had succeeded too, until I felt a warm hand grasp lightly on my shoulder, pulling me to their own body and tucking me under their arm.

I looked back cautiously, heart divided. A large part of me threatened to scream for help, afraid of the person I would find behind me. Even so, I felt butterflies rising up, from my stomach into my throat at the close contact.

Peeking out below my bangs, I let out a small gasp, surprised to find Chansik holding me lightly, as if I were the most fragile thing in the world. 

He smiled brightly, causing my heart to beat wildly out of its normal range. For a moment, I was horrified that he too, could feel the embarrassingly fast speed.

“Nara-ah, since you got the highest grade on that last math test, do you think you could tutor me sometime?”

I pouted, confused at his request. “A tutor? But didn’t you hear the teacher say you got the next highest sc-“

“Great! Meet me by the park in an hour, alright? I’ll be waiting for you!”

If aegyo could kill, I had probably died already three or four time throughout the whole conversation. Chansik wanted me to tutor him? Nowadays, some things really made no sense.

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Walking home, the beating of my heart never slowed and the places on my arm ad shoulder that his fingers had touched felt raw and hot. My mind was a mess; thoughts jumbling into one another, everything becoming incomprehensible.

What had gotten into him? He was obviously lying about the tutor; he was one of the smartest guys in the entire class! If it wasn’t that, what else could it be? A date? I shook my head, clearing the possibility. Yeah right, like that was it. 

Still, I felt myself unconsciously smiling at the thought. Chansik was, after all, a pretty good guy. Way too good if you asked me. He didn’t deserve someone this damaged.

I was so immersed in my own world that by the time I looked up, I was already at my house. Pulling out the keys, I attempted to open the door, only to find a bright blue sticky note on the window.

STOP.

Written in big blockish letters, I tilted my head curiously. Was this from Kris? I turned around back towards the direction of his house, still contemplating the strangeness of it all. My earlier note was gone, and now, so was the rock. I guess he really meant what he wrote.

I chucked at his foolishness. Maybe his actions in class were meant to scare me off. Like his weird behavior and a missing rock was going to stop me. I was more dedicated than he thought.

Bounding across the street again, I arrived before his front door, notebook and pen ready in hand.

STOP.

I smirked. Two sticky notes with the same message? I had to applaud his effort, but honestly, I didn’t see the harm in what I was doing. He seemed lonely, and the only thing I wanted to be was his friend. 

 But I obeyed his request and stopped writing small notes. Instead, I confidently knocked on his door, each pound resounding through the empty street.

The door opened almost suddenly, his angry face blocking the crack, shielding the rays of light that tried to stream past his body.

I thought I told you to stop,” he growled harshly, practically tearing my head off with his words.

“So you want to be friends?” I asked, ignoring his rash statement. What was he even so angry for? I was just being friendly!

“Friends?” He ran a hand through his messy hair, sighing at the mere thought. “Sorry, but we can’t be friends. Not now, not later, not ever. You probably wouldn’t even understand if I told you why.”

“Try me.”

He sighed again, louder this time, rubbing his bloodshot eyes tiredly.

“Fine. We’ll be friends if it makes you stop pestering me with your constant notes. But you can’t ever get attached. You can't follow me, or even talk to me. You can’t run to me with your problems. You can’t complain about your life because I won’t care.”

With that, he his heel and disappeared within the comfort of his home, not even sparing a single glance at me.

I smiled to myself, proud to have finally cracked the angry boy with only the smallest output of effort. Even with all those conditions, I was sure that it would only be a matter of time before those came tumbling down as well. Either way, we were going to be the greatest friends ever, I would make sure of that.

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Finally updated! I've got so many ideas jumbling around in my head but it's so hard to actually put it into a coherent storyline OTL

Thanks for reading ~