Pacing back and forth in her old room, Mina clutched her tail with both her hands, partly to prevent herself from tripping, but mostly because she just needed to hold on to something. She knew what she had done was foolish, and she had let her emotions get the better of her. The desire was new, something Mina had never experienced before. Granted, her previous owners were so terrible that all she could wish for was to get out of there. Not once did she ever feel jealous or possessive of her human. Not until Chaeyoung, obviously. And despite how embarrassed she was feeling, she found not an ounce of regret within herself. Chaeyoung was hers, and other hybrids should know that. Still feeling Sana’s foul scent at the back of her nose, she huffed before burying her face into the pillow. Sadly, this bed didn’t have Chaeyoung’s scent in it. But she’s too embarrassed to go out.

There’s no way she would let that dog hybrid anywhere near Chaeyoung again.

She also couldn’t help thinking how good it felt to have Chaeyoung beneath her. She had never been in that position, where she could take control and not be scared to death of being beaten if anything went wrong. It’s not only about how empowered she felt, but also how secure she was around Chaeyoung. And how good Chaeyoung’s body felt against her. It scared her how much she hadn’t wanted to stop, and how much she wanted to do more than scenting Chaeyoung. It’s the carnal desire that she used to despise, the one that made her body react when the previous owners forced themselves on her. She loathed herself for being half animal, having such desire that easily took over her right mind.

The human girl was so nice, so pure, and Mina’s tainted mind was going to ruin everything.

Hiding herself beneath the blanket, she tried to push the intrusive thoughts about her past out of her mind. Eventually, she settled on the one thought that wasn’t destructive. The fact that Chaeyoung hadn’t pushed her away meant the human girl wasn’t repulsed by the action. Maybe she should give both of them time and space to cool off and then things would go back to normal.

***

Chaeyoung sighed for umpteen times as she tossed and turned in her bed. It wasn’t until now did she realise how much her body had gotten used to sleeping beside Mina. It’s not like she hated sleeping, what she hated was the sleep latency and the nightmares that came in the middle of the night. She had tried all the methods her therapist suggested, but none of those worked really well. And surely none of them could compare to having Mina beside her.

As she turned to lie on her side, her gaze was captured by the layer of blankets, her hideout. She didn’t use it as much compared to before, and she knew by now that those blankets couldn’t soothe her as quickly and effectively as Mina, who was definitely avoiding her. She knew where Mina was and how easy it was to reach out to her. Then again, the fear of getting rejected prevented her from jumping out of bed and rushing to the hybrid’s room. Mina was avoiding her after all.

Chaeyoung squeezed her eyes shut thinking about the previous event on the couch. Despite how hard she tried, she couldn’t forget how good Mina’s body felt on top of her. The hybrid was strong, Chaeyoung could feel it, when she was trapped between Mina’s thighs and her hands were pinned on top of her head. An involuntary shiver ran through her when she reminisced Mina’s hot breath on her skin, and the way the tongue brushed that spot on her neck. She tilted her head back while her quivering finger brushed that patch of skin and slowly travelled up to rest on her lips. Suddenly, her eyes snapped open as she jolted up from her bed. She was by Mina, a cat hybrid!

To be honest, Chaeyoung wasn’t a stranger to kissing people, having fooled around with a few girls in her high school years. She was pretty famous for her art skill. But it was short-lived. After the accident, it was hard to get herself to feel anything other than anger and grief, let alone…this.

And not that she had anything against hybrids, no. It’s just she and Mina just became more open and friendly with each other recently. Rushing into that sort of relationship so quickly wouldn’t be a good thing. Not to mention she didn’t know what Mina felt about all of this. All she knew was that the cat was becoming protective of her, and Mina had simply shown her claim. It was a reasonable action because they were living together now. And Mina, as her cat, had every right to do that. Cats were territorial creatures, she had learned from documentaries, and action like this was important, and expected. Not that she expected Mina to be on top of her. It just came with this claiming/scent marking or whatever it was, like products with terms and conditions. But then, what did the kissing had anything to do with Mina scent-marking her? Chaeyoung ought to do more research on cat hybrids.

She groaned, running her hands through her short hair. She knew sleep wouldn’t come to her that night. Now she had let her mind wander, no, speed to a trainwreck, she must find something to distract herself. Tiptoeing downstairs, she really hoped Mina was asleep. Nothing on the TV could distract her from her thoughts, and she couldn’t do stress cooking. It’s too much noise. Sighing, she diverted her look to the window but the only thing she could see was the dimmed streetlight that could only illuminate a pool of snow gathered around its pole. Looking back down to her clothes, a pair of pyjamas and a long fluffy robe tied loosely by an outer belt, she crossed out the option of going for a walk. Her hand fiddled the end of her sleeve before tapping impatiently on the sofa, desperately finding something to do. Her eyes rested on a notepad on the table and the pen clasped on its side. She had put it there so she could write down the to-dos and shopping list. Now, with a million thoughts running through her mind, she needed a channel to vent.

Chaeyoung had never been praised for her skill with words. She didn’t have much communication problems, at least before the accident, but she’d rather keep silent when she didn’t have to do otherwise. Her thoughts were always flying around in her head, in many different shapes and forms, and it was difficult to gather them and forge them into the same boring repeated letters. There’s only so many letters in the alphabet and the dictionary. But arts, on the other hand, was her forte. Chaeyoung has always loved painting, with colourful, flowing twists and turns, without a care about social norms and how to make people understand her words. Not all could understand her drawing, and that’s fine, as long as they didn’t make her explain to her in words. They didn’t have to understand her drawing to appreciate it.

Tragically, her arts, in some way, was the indirect cause of the loss of her family and Chaeyoung was left broken ever since. But her hand could only be retained for so long. Ever since the incident in the living room, where she was so enthralled that her hand picked up a pen to capture Mina's beauty, the urge of drawing again had come around often in her mind. It wasn't because she missed picking up the brushes or the process of drawing. No, what urged her was her need to capture the moment, to express and sort out whatever strange sensations that bubbled inside her whenever she's with Mina. She wanted to capture how Mina made her feel when the hybrid was lying on the sofa, head on her lap, and how silly Mina looked when she wrinkled her nose smelling something unpleasant. The more she paid attention to little things Mina did, the messier her head would feel, and Chaeyoung wanted to draw to take that off her mind. Arts was her way of venting.

She stared at the notepad and the pen again.

It wouldn't hurt to pick up a pen, would it?

There were just a few scribbles at first, some lines here and there. It didn't have to have any specific shape or mean anything. But her mind couldn't steer clear of Mina even with the tiniest . This spiral reminded her of Mina's tail when it curled around her body. These connecting dots were the tiny moles on Mina's face. This was the curve of the hybrid's smile while that was the curve of her body - Chaeyoung blushed and scolded herself at the thought of it. These pointy triangles were Mina's fluffy ears that were so soft to the touch. Then it turned to something more abstract, like the rays of light when Mina first smiled at her, the twinkle and pureness of snow when it rested on Mina's hair and shoulders. Or the fuzzy tingling when she combed her hand through the hybrid's hair when the latter purred at the pampering.

Before she knew it, bits and pieces of Mina and herself appeared on the notepad, pages after pages, her ghost of the past temporarily forgotten.

Little hearts and stars surrounded the shapes were just random doodles.

Mina knew Chaeyoung wasn't asleep. Time stretched out agonisingly and the day passed slowly