“I like you, Ms. Tiffany. I really like you, to the extent it drives me crazy.”

Emotional yet firm words from the teenager stopped Tiffany from walking further and she stood frozen at her spot, awestruck not only at the sudden confession but also the way her heart immediately reacted by beating faster and louder. She felt as if she was brought back to 20 years ago when Erika confessed to her in front of the whole college at the talent show.

So the feelings have been mutual all long, both from me and Taeyeon...?

She realized at that time that she was so doomed.

Then, she felt the presence of Taeyeon close at her back.

“Everyday, I think of what you might be doing, I look forward to the times I come to your home for study, I feel delighted when I see you, I get tingly when you touch me or smile at me, and my heart hurts whenever you meet that man from your studio. And I know. I also know I'm not supposed to, but I only keep falling harder everyday. Tell me, Ms. Tiffany, what should I do?”

Her voice shook at the end which Tiffany sensed that she was holding back from crying. And to admit, it hurt her as well.

She gulped hard, trying to ignore the loud hammering in her chest and turned to face the girl.

“You don't know what you're talking about, Taeyeon,” she slowly spoke, staring into teary eyes of the girl, “you're a 15-years-old and not really at the age yet to be able to distinguish if you ‘like' or merely ‘get infatuated’ over someone.”

“I-I'm not 15,” the student retorted, “I'm turning 16 next month.”

The older woman subtly rolled her eyes, “Ok, 16, but what makes the difference anyway? At your age, people tend to go through this stage where they develop some kind of crush on someone who are nice and kind to them. You know what, I also had a huge crush on my school teacher during high school and I naturally got over it after some time. That's it. It’ll be the same for you,” she paused and looked up to the dark sky when she felt droplets of rain started falling on her hands, “now come inside first, Taeyeon, it's gonna rain.”

She attempted to turn and leave but stopped by a desperate clutch on the sleeve of her jacket.

“What if I don't....” the girl said and looked straight into her eyes where Tiffany noticed tears already fallen down her plump cheeks, “what if I don't get over it? I told you I’m only falling deeper and harder as each day passes. So what if I don't...I can't get over it like you said?”

The rain started pouring heavily and started soaking the both of them, but neither of them could move.

“Then you should try harder to move on anyway,” the American-Korean woman spoke after a few moments of silence apart from the sobs from the girl, “because this is wrong and you know that.” She almost felt like giving in to the girl's pair of pleading eyes.

She pulled back her arm from the girl's hold and turned away to leave with her back facing Taeyeon, not wanting to let the girl see her own watery eyes.

“Why is it wrong?” she heard the erupted cry of the teenager from her back, “Just what is so wrong? Gender? ? Isn't sincere hearts from the two people enough? What else is so important?”

Tiffany’a fingers balled into tight fists and tears began to fall although she tried so hard to fight back, as similar memories from her long past rewound in her head.

November 2002

“Now let go of me,” Tiffany yanked her hands away from the pull and attempted to leave, but was pulled back again in a face-to-face position with the girl she just rejected to date.

“Do you mean it?” the senior college student bored her eyes into hers, as if looking for confirmation, “Do you really not have any feelings for me? Am I just imagining things? Look straight into my eyes and tell me honestly, Tiffany.”

“I...I...” the confessed girl hesitated, unable to give a proper reason and instead felt choked up in frustration and sadness, “we can't, Erika. This is impossible. You know why.”

“What is impossible? Your religion, right? I'm not Christian so I might not know a lot but no religion denies pure love between two individuals, Tiffany. Our feelings are mutual, and that's what matters the most. What else would be the issue? And your family, right, it will be hard and it will take time. But we can give it a try together. This is the U.S. so I’m sure they'll eventually get to understand and accept even if not yet now. We can work this out together, Tiffany. Let's give ‘us' a try please.”

Tiffany blinked as she briefly wiped her tears with the back of her hand and softly spoke, enough for the girl at her back to hear, “Some things just aren't meant to happen, Taeyeon. What will not work, will not work.”

With that, she walked away, leaving the girl standing and crying under the rain.

Both in anticipation and nervousness, Tiffany pushed open the unlocked door to her daughter's bedroom a little, just to find the girl studying alone at her table.

“Oh, umma, you’re back,” said Yeri as she noticed her mom's presence at the door.

“Yeah, sorry if I disturbed you studying.”

“Nah, not at all.”

“And,” the woman pondered for a second but continued, “Taeyeon didn't come today too?”

Since that night of confession, it had been four days that Taeyeon stopped showing up at her house. It was the last time Tiffany saw her, and she couldn't help but feel worried and anxious for her absence. Yeri tried to call her friend as well but the girl even turned her phone off completely and they only got informed by her parents that she fell sick and had to rest at home, which of course included being absent to school. Tiffany had to admit that she couldn't get used to not seeing the girl at home even if she tried to deny the feeling.

“Yup,” Yeri replied, discouraged, “actually tod