Yejin’s hand trembles as she sits there waiting for her blind date.  Until now she can’t believe that her mother was able to make this happen.  She is grateful yet resentful of this whole scenario. She had just broken up with boyfriend of 3 years. He said that he doesn’t love her anymore, that’s it.  No other explanation.  One minute she has a boyfriend whom she loves and then the next minute, he doesn’t love her anymore.  It’s only been a month since he left her, she is still in shock and still looking for answer. Is it me? Did I change? Did I make him fall out of love? What did I do?

Because of these, she’s usually by herself, staring in blank spaces, thinking, blaming herself.

She tapped her handphone to look at the time, its 6:45 pm, they’re meeting at 7pm. She purposely went there early because she was so nervous.  Is it still a blind date even if you already know who you’re meeting? She has always been a fan of BTS though she is a silent ARMY. And yes, her bias is Kim Seokjin. Before she met her boyfriend, her room was full of posters and albums of BTS.  But since her boyfriend thinks its childish, she took them down and just keeps the BT21 merchs.

Her mom is classmates with Seokjin’s mother in elementary and recently they had just had a reunion.  They were close friends until they got separated in college.  Her mom then went to city outskirt where she found a job and had family.  It’s been almost 5 years now since they relocated in Seoul since her father was reassigned and she also found a job.

“Excuse me” said the waiter, “would like some water?”

She looked at her water goblin and found that it was empty already, she must’ve been really nervous. tends of feel dry whenever she’s nervous or anxious.

“Yes please.”

As the waiter pour some water, she asked. “I would like to place order already if it’s possible.”

“Yes, of course” he said. “Are you dining alone Ma’am?”

“No, but I will order for him” she said. “We’ll have 2 sets your full course dinner set, that’s with the rib eye steak, right?” Though Jin’s mother arranged this meeting and pick out the restaurant, fortunately this is her favorite restaurant, so she is familiar with the menu.  She also recalls that Jin loves steaks.

“Yes Ma’am, I’ll have it ready.”

“Thank you, kindly serve it as soon as my friend arrives.” She asked politely.

Even though she is excited to meet her bias, she knew that this might be a nuisance to him.  And as person in his position who didn’t need to have a blind date, she can imagine how inconvenience this might be for him. So she thought that she will keep to herself, make this date a fast as possible and get the hell out of here.

She glanced at the reception and she saw him. Him, the Kim Seokjin himself, in the flesh. Her heart is beating so fast and so loud she’s thought it will jump out of her chest. Oh no, I can’t do this, she thought, she stood up and decided to go but its too late already. She took a seat and just focused on her phone.

She didn’t have the courage to lift her face up, she can feel that he is staring at her. It makes her feel so uncomfortable. Like he is seeing her , her face feels warm, oh no, am in blushing? No, no, no.

She responded to him as short as possible she feels that her voice might crack in any moment. When he said that we should order, she just told him that she already did, and their dinner arrived as is being served by the waiter. She can’t even taste the food, there was a soup, she just ate it didn’t even feel that its hot, then the salad and the steak.  She just continuously cut and chew the food and when her plate is empty, she just stood up and said goodbye.

She slowly walked toward the door and her knee felt week, then she suddenly remembers that he needs his number as a proof to her mother that she went that she had to convince her that it went well.  She planned to text him for a couple of times then just tell her mother that it’s not working out.

She turn around, she looked at him it seems that he is surprised when I just left.

“I’m sorry, but I need to get your number” she timidly said. “Our mothers would ask questions about this, and if you don’t want to be bothered any more by it, it’s better if we exchanged numbers and just pretend to have a good date.  Then after some time, we’ll just tell them that we are just not into each other.”

His eyes widen a little, surprised maybe, but then pick up my phone and keyed in his number, he even dialed it so that my number will register on his phone.  I heard his phone vibrated from his pocket.

“I also got your number” he said.

Picked up my phone and left.