whenever kang hyewon proclaims her love for miyawaki sakura, the latter replies back with I love you too; so why the hell are they still barely more than friends?

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instagram - DEAN

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hyewon's favorite part of the day is when sakura posts something on her personal instagram account, be it a post, a story, or even a live, an entire ocean is separating them after all. it's only natural that she's spending most of her time at the application to keep tabs on her girls; text messages are too boring so instagram it is.

they have their group chat though, active and alive, but hyewon's a show-off and she likes letting the fans know that she still loves sakura-chan but she figures they already know that, judging by the amount of times she pulls the older girl into her skinship during their time as a group.

though that was the past when they were still around each other, when they were still a group. now, it's only her without the others; sure the others meet up with girls like yena and chaewon for example or the japanese line. but she can only do so much with the circumstances around her like the worldwide pandemic that's happening these days.

hyewon would have to make do with the internet; until time would let her be with her cherry blossom again, this would make do for the mean time. if only she could just sneak for a week without anyone knowing then things would be a lot easier.

she plans on changing that though.

•

her phone chimes again with that familiar notification sound, it's not like she's been using any other apps recently. hurriedly opening up her phone, a smile breaks out of her face when she sees sakura's message on her direct messages.

@39saku_chan: wyd

@hyemhyemu: nothing much, wbu?

@39saku_chan: bored outta my mind

@39saku_chan: call?

@hyemhyemu: are you missing me again miyawaki sakura?

@39saku_chan: no

@hyemhyemu: tsundere

@39saku_chan: no u

@hyemhyemu: I'll call now

hyewon calls the older girl, the ringing resonating in her ears as she patiently waits for the latter to pick up.

"hello?" sakura's voice was music to her ears, it's only been a month after their disbandment and she can't deny that she's missed the japanese already. a bit too much actually.

"sakura-chan, I miss you." hyewon croaks, missing the girl too much.

"you always say that kang-chan." 

"why not? it's true." 

"if you really miss me that much, why don't you visit me here in Japan?" sakura's voice teases her.

hyewon ponders for a moment, sure she could go to japan but how?

"you sounded like you missed me for a second there kura-chan." hyewon chuckles slightly but it turns out awkward when there's a dead silence on the other end of the call.

"I mean! of course I do miss you..." the older pauses for a moment, "the members are too busy almost all of the time..."

the korean visual could almost feel the pout of the cherry blossom even though they're miles apart. she hears a muffled sigh on her phone which causes her eyebrows to furrow.

"what's the matter my love? you can always talk to me." hyewon encourages, feeling the same sentiments as her unnie at the moment.

"you know, I'm starting to think that you're not doing anything. don't you have schedules or things to do? you're awfully almost always online whenever I text you on kakaotalk or here." sakura says with a trace of accusation in her voice, completely ignoring the endearment directed towards her.

hyewon lets out a laugh at the said tone, "you do know that I'd always put you above everything else right?" 

she hears a series of coughs after that, who knew that the great miyawaki sakura is incredibly embarrassed towards cheesy, romantic words.

"stop saying things like that kang-chan! you're going to embarrass me here." the japanese scolds while her words are still being cut off by her coughs.

"back to the original topic, what seems to be the matter these days kura-yah?" hyewon diverts the topic before she could even embarrass the girl on the call even further.

"like I said, all of you are jam-packed on schedules. even hitomi-chan and nako-chan barely visit me these days because of their work." sakura says. 

"almost all of you are also busy, the group chat is alive but we all reply like hours later since we don't have the same timings."

"but I'm not busy now?" the yangsan-born asks confusedly.

"do you ever get busy?"

hyewon smirks to herself even when there's no one around to witness it, she has another line that she can bust on her cherry blossom.

"not when it comes to you, my cherry blossom."

an audible groan was emitted by the japanese over the phone call; hyewon's trying her hardest not to laugh at sakura's reaction.

"GOD KANG-CHAN STOP!!!" sakura exclaims so loudly that hyewon has to pull her ear over to save her eardrums from the girl's piercing voice.

she waited for a few minutes before putting her phone on her ear once more, to her surprise, she hears subtle mumbling and cursing on the other line.

"hello?" she calls out curiously.

"hey kang-chan, I have something going up. I'll call you again later okay?" 

to say that she was disappointed was an understatement - truthfully, hyewon still wanted to spend her time on the phone with sakura but fate has different plans. at least she still has something to look forward to later.

"alright, take care always there kura-yah, I love you always and I'll see you soon."

the korean hears a scoff and a snort at her words before getting a reply.

"sure you do, take care too hewon-ah, I love you too. I'll be waiting for you here soon or else you can kiss your life goodbye." sakura threatens, hyewon imagines the girl bulging her eyes as if to scare the younger girl away.

saying their goodbyes once more, sakura's caller i.d. hung up but hyewon's still missing her, even after their call - like she always does this past month.

it can't be helped unfortunately, she'd just have to pray for an opportunity to open up so she could be finally go to her home away from home.

wait did she just called me hewon-ah? and did she really say I love you too?

•

some time, she sees sakura's story; it was a selfie of her - so naturally, the first thing that comes to her mind is to compliment the pink-haired beauty.

@hyemhyemu: everyday, I fall in love with you deeper.

@39saku_chan: yeah sure, hey wanna play league?

@hyemhyemu: anything for my beloved.

@39saku_chan: beloved my , I'll wait for you there.

and so hyewon finds herself playing said game with sakura for god knows how long. it's so late already that she swears all the appreciation to the heavens when she manage to wake herself up after the loading screen.

seeing the base of the enemy destroyed once again for the nth time that they finished, she sees the words 'victory' displayed on screen before clicking continue and prepares to exit the game but not before replying to the girl's messages at the game client.

sakura: wow, your teemo is seriously something else.

hyewon: meh, it's not that good

sakura: it is! god I was literally laughing irl when they were dying by your shrooms

hyewon: I'm willing to die to teemo's mushrooms if it meant saving you.

sakura: god you're really a weird one... thanks tho

hyewon: it's already 4, take a rest already kura-chan. I love you.

sakura: do the same then. 

sakura: I love you too hyewonie

sakura has logged off.

the younger girl narrows her eyes at the last message sent to her on the computer screen. normally, the japanese wasn't always showy when telling the korean she loved her but now, it's a confusing phenomenon.

but my I love you is different than her I love you. she thought sadly but there's no point in crying over spilled milk, if this is the only way she's getting the three magical words form sakura then be it; better that than nothing at all.

•

kang hyewon gets a notification telling that @39saku_chan has shared your post in their story. grinning widely, she opens her phone to see that sakura has indeed shared her post and put it on her story with a caption along the lines of 'isn't hyewonie really pretty?'.

she feels her face heat for a hot second when sees the story of her japanese friend. most of the time, it's hyewon who compliments her but to get this out of nowhere? some RKO type of sorcery probably. of course, hyewon shares it on her own story; replying with 'what is it? what do you want?' 

her phone rang again with the instagram notification and she opens it to see that the older girl has replied to her story previously with 'Expensive beef, expensive sashimi, expensive kimchijjigae and expensive potatoes.'

the visual grins to herself due to how cute that actually sounded in her head, she envisions the older girl telling her the things that she want to eat in a pouting way - though she need not to pout because hyewon's willing to give her anything she wants, that's just how it is; she messages sakura on their private messages with a teasing tone.

@hyemhyemu: you could've just straight up told me that you wanted a date

@39saku_chan: how are we even going to go on a date if we're miles apart :<

@hyemhyemu: I can teleport there :))

@39saku_chan: I WISH

@hyemhyemu: have to sell my soul to the devil tho

@39saku_chan: pls do

@hyemhyemu: you should post more often on your yt channel

@39saku_chan: as if you'd watch it

@hyemhyemu: ofc I'd watch it

@hyemhyemu: I'd be your first subscriber

@39saku_chan: oh wOw thAt's fLatteRing

@hyemhyemu: just do it okay? I love you

@39saku_chan: righttttt I love you too. gotta grab a plate now

@hyemhyemu: aight eat well. I love you (1) 

@39saku_chan: you already said that

@hyemhyemu: I'll say it a million times so that you won't forget it

@39saku_chan: god you're so CRINGEY

@39saku_chan: I'm really hungry gtg! I'll talk to you later mwa! *xoxo*

•

"are you sure that she really means it in a platonic way?" yena inquires as they wait at the front door of hyewon's apartment.

"yeah, maybe it's not that way." chaeyeon adds as she sips more of her milktea.

hyewon was wordless as she fishes out the key of her place from her pocket. she inserts it in the doorknob and twists it with a click but she remained still as she looks at the two of them in their eyes.

"believe me, she's incredibly dense." the oldest says with fake exasperation in her voice, intentionally dragging the first word of her sentence.

the dancer and the other 99-liner just shrugged to theirselves before following hyewon suit inside the place. the first thing she does is run towards her room and flailed on her bed then grabs a pillow before using it to muffle her loudest scream ever.

"god kwangbae, you're really insufferable." yena calls out from the sofa where she's currently laying down.

"just believe me this one time guys, I'll show you when we get on a video call together." 

"how can you even say that she's dense?" chaeyeon asks, milktea already shot in her trash bin.

"I don't know!" hyewon exclaims frustratingly.

"you say she also tells you I love you too and isn't that supposed to be good because you know..." chaeyeon pauses and looks at yena, "people who love each other do that?"

"I mean, friends also proclaim they love each other even though that's nothing more." hyewon drawls before taking a breath and continuing on to her rant, "heck, I get I love you's everyday from maybe yuri or yujin when we were together."

yena and chaeyeon laughs at the visual's story, missing their main vocalist and the youngest member of the Suspenderz line; they were reminiscing about their memories as a group when a phone call caught their attention. both of them checked their phones to see if it's theirs but they look up to see that it's hyewon's - the caller i.d. tells them that sakura is calling.

chaeyeon and yena run towards it at light speed and hands it over to the sulking girl frantically.

"quick, it's kura-chan." yena tells her.

suddenly, the girl on the bed is shot high and her phone's on her ear already; a smile already present on her lips.

"hello to you hewon-ah." sakura's sweet voice calls her out, sounding like sweet honey.

the two younger friends look at each other weirdly when they see hyewon's face, it was a look of immense admiration and love and admittedly, it's cute but they're so used to hyewon looking like a statue that they have the urge to puke at the precious face.

"hey there sakura-chan, I'm with best-laughter-korea and ducky." hyewon says as she raises her eyebrows at the two girls who look like they're doing imitations of someone puking.

"oohh!! can I talk to them?" sakura excitedly asks of her.

"turn on your video chat so you can see them." the younger instructs which the other did.

as soon as she opens her camera, the two girls rushed forward while screaming along the way; they were fighting on who should hold the phone. when the dust finally settled, hyewon was in the middle while her friends are beside her.

"hi sakura-chan, we miss you!!" yena shouts at the screen causing the said girl to laugh out loud on her own.

"you don't even call us kura-chan!" chaeyeon pouts.

"but I call hyewonie almost always! my battery's drained most of the time because of her." sakura explains while laughing.

the statement caused the two to turn their gaze to hyewon with a knowing look and a teasing smile. hyewon's eyes widened as the two look at her and opens to speak but she was cut off by chaeyeon's voice.

"oh really? hyewonie here is keeping you for yourself?" the feather-dancer wags her eyebrows teasingly at the cherry blossom on her screen, soon enough, yena also joins in on the teasing.

"well, hyewonie here is always free so I tend to pester her because I get away with it mosly." sakura says, mouth slightly muffed since she just bought a food.

"kwangbae lets you pester her?!? wow... she never answers to our calls or messages." yena exclaims and feeling betrayed that sakura gets the special treatment when she's the same-age as hyewon.

"well for starters, it's because I love her. unlike you, I don't love you." hyewon interrupts, taking her phone away from yena and shooting her a harmless glare.

"anyways, how are you saku-chan?" as if a soul possessed her, the visual's face turned a hundred and eighty degress and is now bright and smiley, contrast to earlier when she scowled at yena.

sakura frowns at the screen, "that's bad kang-chan, go apologize to yena-yah." 

"b-but that was a joke-" hyewon tries to explain herself to no success

"still! go apologize." sakura orders her sternly.

feeling defeat, hyewon hugs yena and whispers I love you in her ears; the action causes yena to pull back and laugh out loud due to the tickling sensation of hyewon's breath.

"there, you happy?" hyewon grunts to the girl on screen as she tries to pull yena's cheek apart.

"aw~~ are you angry at me hyewonie?" sakura coos, finding amusement at her member's sulking face.

"no, I love you." the black-haired korean says.

"you say that like a million times you know?" the japanese replies with a smile back.

"can't help it I guess." the other girl shrugs.

the two who were watching from the sidelines were stunned as they see the interaction between the korean and the japanese; they feel like they're in some sort of movie where they are the background characters.

"wow, kwangbae DOES say I love you's." yena whisper to the equally stunned dancer, only getting a bare nod as a reply.

as a result, they were wordlessly watching kang's face brighten everytime she's listening to whatever sakura's saying - but to be fair, hyewon's always had heart eyes for the foreigner, way, way back from when they even debuted together; it's actually a miracle how the older never seemed to notice this, they know because they're the bestfriends of the said people respectively.

said trio spent most of their time catching up with their japanese friend given how hard it is to contact one another due to conflicting schedules.

the sun already went down when they actually notice how long they've been talking to each other about everything. a call from yena's and chaeyeon's phones signals their time's up. they prep theirselves to leave while hyewon stays a bit longer on her phone to talk to sakura.

once they were finished, hyewon stands up and accompanies the duo out of her apartment; they notice hyewon fixated on her screen while talking to her cherry blossom in an unusually low voice.

"sakura-chan, I gotta go now. I have to drive the two to their places." she whispers, earning the attention of the two curious girls.

"take care of yourself hyewon-ah..." sakura tells her in a soft voice, "and disinfect yourself after you get home!" then the voice rises up, now sounding more like a command.

"yes I will, I love you always." hyewon intentionally lowers the last four words but her friends have hypersensitive hearing for some reason so she hears subtle chuckling from her back.

"good. now let me talk to them for a minute." the japanese orders which she automatically did.

chaeyeon and yena were busy thinking of ways to tease the korean visual when they hear their names called out by a certain japanese.

"you two, take care of yourselves alright?" she asks to which the two nodded, "see you when I see you guys. Bye!" her eyes crinkles.

"take care there kura-chan, we miss you!" chaeyeon bids her goodbyes.

"bye kura-chan, take good care of our kwangbae!" yena smirks at the surprised face.

"yah, aren't you supposed to be the ones who should do that? you're like a ride away from each other unlike me." sakura exclaims incredulously.

"JUST DO IT!!" the two roared in chorus.

suddenly, hyewon flashes in between them and pulls them towards her car by taking a tight hold on their arms. once inside, the visual checks her things to make sure she's set while also checking her friends.

"god, you two take so long to say your goodbyes." she complains as she handles the steering wheel in her left hand while she revs the engine to life.

"didn't peg you to be a jealous type, kwangbae." yena deadpans.

"don't worry kwangbae, chaekura is strictly a sister-like relationship." chaeyeon shrugs, opting to look at the moving scenery around her as they speed towards their destinations.

hyewon feels the muscle in her eye twitch ever so slightly as she mutters under her breath, "these little s."

•

hyewon woke up with a blast today, it's the day of their planned zoom call with all the girls and she couldn't be more ecstatic now that they'll be able to catch up with one another after a very long time.

the first thing she does when she opens her eyes is head towards the bathroom and wash her face then take a toothbrush early. after that, she lies down again on her bed for a bit, feeling the warmness of the comforter welcoming as the sun greeted her under rainy clouds. 

she messages sakura by sending rapid messages in order to wake her up. after more than twenty good morning my love, the said girl finally replied to her with: god kang-chan, it's only like 7 in the morning. plz let me sleep again :3

the girl supposes she could give sakura a break as they really went all out last night in the video call with her, she sends her a voice message that consists of her telling the older to take a snooze for a bit and also I love you :>>.

exactly ten minutes have elapsed by the time she sent that message when she gets a reply from the girl telling that she's up and wide awake already. smiling, hyewon left it at that and proceeded to start her day.

•

hyewon's pretty sure she's tired now, she just got back from her company building after staying for about an hour and a half and she's already feeling exhausted even though she just sat on the meeting discussing her future plans.

she's barely dragging herself to her place when she feels her phone being notified. feelingg refreshed now, her lips crack a smile when she reads the members' messages bombarding her; apparently, she's the only one not yet in the meeting and they're waiting for her.

opening her laptop, she went straight for the zoom app and enters the room that eunbi made for the group; there, she was greeted by 11 faces on the screen. ones that gave her proof that forever does exist - in the span of two and a half years.

"yah, hyewon-ah! why are you late by 5 mins?!?!" yena's voice scolded her through the screen.

"chill the out, be grateful it's not for an hour." hyewon nonchalantly says.

series of gasping and groans were what came to the korean's eardrums after she casually cursed out of nowhere; she was about to drop it and ignore them when her ears perked at the sound of yujin's voice snitching her out to sakura.

"unnie, kwangbae always curses us." yujin pouts, intentionally trudging her lower lips outward and looking overall like a kicked puppy on the camera.

"yah! kang-chan, what did I tell you about cursing our friends?" the cherry blossom's voice scolds her along the snickering and chuckling of her friends.

she puts her face on her hands and groans exaggeratedly, it seems like that every time - her friends using the one trump card they have on her because they know how she's so wrapped around the second eldest's fingers so they use it every time they can.

"all of you are unfair, ers-" hyewon glares but a text from sakura halts her from completing the sentence.

miyawaki sakura: hyewon 

miyawaki sakura: if u curse again

miyawaki sakura: i won't talk to u

kang hyewon: as if u can do that

miyawaki sakura: don't underestimate me

kang hyewon: ily and all but u don't scare me

kang hyewon: you won't do that ryt?

kang hyewon: right..?

kang hyewon: ok i'll stop

kang hyewon: sorry

miyawaki sakura: good, ilyt :3

hyewon sighs at that, knowing she really has no power over the girl bums her out sometimes but hey, she loves her so be it. she was still deep in thought when she hears her name called by her former leader.

"hyewon-ah, what's got you smiling while texting? or should I say, who?" eunbi teases while the others join.

"hyewon-unnie, I thought I'm your baby?" chaewon's voice sulks but she sees the girl smiling too.

"psshh, it's sakura-chan of course. who could even make kwangbae smile out of nowhere but her?" yena shrugs from her place.

a nervous chuckle erupted from the visual when she feels all eleven pair of eyes dart towards her, hyewon nervously gulped when she spots sakura also eyeing her curiously.

"u-uh well, I smile out of nowhere too when I talk with you guys on the phone." she reasons out, hoping that the slight tremble in her voice wasn't noticeable.

"ehh? you're definitely lying kang-chan." nako narrows her eyes on her.

"what does that even mean?" hyewon asks while rubbing her hands on her pants.

"first off, you don't even text us hyewon-unnie. I mean not on a daily basis - well, actually you do but I doubt that you smile out of nowhere when talk to us." the youngest, wonyoung, tells it in a straight face to which the others nodded in agreement.

"plus! don't think we don't see your messages to sakura-unnie when she posts it on her ig stories." minju adds, furthering screwing her over.

"yeah kwangbae, I'm sure I've heard kura-chan draining her batteries most of the time when she calls and texts you." chaeyeon adds the final straw.

then suddenly, all eyes that were on her were instantly on sakura's now, the girl just shrugging at the attention given to her.

"yeah what about it?" sakura nonchalantly asks like it was a daily question.

"you two act like a couple!" yuri exclaims.

"and...?" sakura raises her eyebrows at the ridiculous question.

gasps chorused from the girls and hyewon feels like she's going to faint on her chair; the girl she loves is so incredibly dense at some instances and this is one of them.

"wow, unnie you're really dense huh." minju facepalms on her screen.

"what's wrong with that?" sakura asks in general.

"I don't think you get what we're saying but we'll let this slide off." eunbi smiles while internally facepalming herself at the younger's obliviousness.

they continue catching up with one another, talking about sakura's graduation, chaeyeon's dance performance, minju's, yujin's, chaewon's, eunbi's respective magazine shoots, hitomi's performance as well as nako's, wonyoung's miumiu project, yuri's and hyewon's best friends issue in elle.

when it was time for them to disconnect, hyewon let them go first one by one until yena and chaeyeon were the onlyones left.

"I'm going out of country." she announces. 

strangely, the two did not look surprised at her intentions, just humming in acknowledgement - as if they knew that the visual would pull a stunt like this; hyewon takes this as a sign to press forward.

"I uhh- made a promise that I'd go to japan to visit her." she says.

"just take care there, now more than ever." the dancer reminds her while yena does the same.

"a pandemic won't stop you from visiting her huh." yena remarks to which she nodded.

they bid their goodbyes and when she's the last one on the room, she leaves and closes her laptop; opting to inform her management that she'll be visiting an important person instead of going to sleep. 

she's going to have to take a picture of sakura's face when she visits her at her hometown.

•

hyewon wakes up the next morning before the sun even breaks out the dark sky, she starts by splashing her face cold water to wake herself up. seeing how she already packed her clothes already at the chrome mallet that she'll be using, the visual just went straight to the kitchen and opened the fridge if there's anything worth cooking there.

the korean cooked egg fried-rice to the best of her abilities and was able to eat it and wash the dishes within the span of ten minutes; it's only five o'clock in the morning and her flight's not due until in the next dawn. she figures it best to just play games while she's doing nothing, it's always best to grind before the season ends.

she opens the game and queues to find a match, hyewon aces all four games and yawns when she finished playing; she notices the sun already rising at the far etched line separating the sky above and the city lights below.

she sleeps again when she feels her eyes shutting down on their own accord; she has all the day for herself after all. 

hyewon dreams of cherry blossoms and the sight of pink smiling back at her.

•