Jimin likes to think he’s floating, he’s weightless, he can’t feel anything and he’s just floating in the air not caring where it carries him. He tries to pretend he can’t feel the bristles of the foundation brush smudging compact powder on his skin, tries to pretend he can’t feel the rough way the makeup artist applies eyeliner above his eyelashes, and tries not think about the heavy lip gloss smeared on his lips. He tries to pretend he’s not wearing a wedding suit. Because pretending is easy and pretending is always much easier than accepting the harsh reality. Yet he fails, his attempts are in vain because the reality is too cruel, too harsh for pretence to win over. Jimin fails and he fails miserably.

His father’s standing before the door that will open up to the wedding alter, reveal the place he’s dreaded for weeks. His father looks young, his grey air is pushed aside revealing his wrinkled forehead, his brown eyes look soft as if it hurts to let his son go. Jimin wants to laugh, he was never his son, why would he feel remorseful to let the ‘hindrance’ for a son go. “Before we go up there,” His father starts and Jimin expects a lecture, on how he should behave and act in the family-,

“I’m sorry. Your mother must be disappointed in me,” The man says, voice low and Jimin barely catches it. Barely. “I am sorry. I was dumb, I didn’t even let my omega son call me father,” Jimin sniffles catching the glazed eyes of his father, he wants to say something, anything but all that he can release from his mouth are broken sobs. It’s okay, he desperately wants to say yet no words utter out of the omega’s mouth. Is it really okay? He could tell his father he forgives him but has he really? He wills back his tears and grabs his father’s elbow, as if clutching onto it can help him from falling into the dark abyss of his mind, “Let’s go, papa.” He whispers meekly softly smiling which his father returns. The doors open and Jimin walks his, clutching his father’s elbow hoping he could wake up, just for once, in his mother’s arms, with her by his side, her blonde hair dropping over her face as she sleeps soundly, her fresh scent of roses that he misses. Yet he can’t wake up, he won’t wake up, it won’t be a dream.

He looks fine but he’s not really fine. He’s shaking, panicking inside, his lungs hurt as if clenching in on themselves. The expanse of his ribs feels too small, his heart beat is too fast but outside his scent is neutral, his composure is fine and he looks fine. He likes to call it art, the art of a beautiful façade. At the wedding alter stands a masked man and Jimin wants to roll his eyes, why the hell did he hide his face all these years. Jungkook holds out his hands eyes glinting under the chandelier above, “Take care of my son Jungkook. Take care of him because I never could,” His father says and tears brim Jimin’s eyes. He can’t leave like this, not like this, he doesn’t want to leave his father like this. Stopping, he nuzzles his father’s cheek placing a kiss on it before taking Jungkook’s hand who helps him up.

Jimin will never admit it but Jungkook’s scent is intoxicating and ethereal, the alpha smells of the rain with a hint of coffee and Jimin loves it though no one has to know that. “Before we start, just remove my mask from the right side only and kiss me so no one can see my face. Sorry,” Jimin nods not trusting his voice in front of the alpha whose scent is driving him crazy. Don’t worry Jimin you’re going to hate him very soon, Jimin assures himself ignoring the words that spew out of the priest’s mouth. “I do,” Jimin replies last without hesitation, what’s the point of it anyways? The only thing hesitation will bring is more hesitation. He opens the mask revealing a beautiful face. Jungkook has bright doe eyes, a cute nose and rose lips. His hair is long reaching his jawline which makes him look beautifully handsome. It’s irksome, the alpha is too handsome. He loses his eyes and presses his lips to Jungkook’s. Their kiss his short but Jimin still feels fireworks, he thinks maybe because he’s never kissed someone before due to his father’s rules. Jimin wonders if Jungkook was affected, then wants to laugh, why would someone be affected by kissing him?

The walk down the wedding alter, Jimin gets a glimpse of his family, his sisters stare at him with pure envy and respite while his brother watches him with a proud smile that makes Jimin blush. His step mother looks rather glum while his father’s eyes are bloodshot from crying. Before he can approach them Jungkook is excitedly dragging them to meet his friends earning a smile from Jimin, “This is the group of idiots I call my friends,” He says proudly earning a giggle, “Park Jimin, nice to meet you,” He holds out his hand which the five young men take turns shaking, they introduce themselves as Namjoon, Yoongi, Seokjin, Taehyung and Hoseok. Their conversation is light hearted and short mainly comprising of humiliating Jungkook in front of his husband, “You guys! I’m trying to make a good impression here!” The alpha whines and Jimin feels the vibes of an energetic kid coming through. However, he doesn’t want that impression, he knows Jungkook will change the second they step into their house.

Jimin feels too tired to dance but he still does, they don’t talk and Jimin feels himself getting lost in Jungkook’s eyes, they hold galaxies, secrets and Jimin feels the need to discover them. He snaps out of his thoughts blushing as he dips his head down not catching the smirk on Jungkook’s face. “May I call you hyung?” Jimin belatedly realises he’s older than Jungkook by two years, he nods not wanting to say anything. They get in the car once the wedding is over and the omega internally sighs in relief, his feet hurt already and he feels drowsy. He holds back a yawn not wanting to sound rude.

The mansion they were to stay in was large gifted by Jungkook’s parents as a gift for their marriage. Jimin gawked at it, how was he supposed to not get lost in this place? Just finding the entrance could be hard for the omega. “You should close your mouth pretty little dove,” Jungkook says and Jimin immediately shuts his mouth blushing furiously at the nickname, “I-I’m,” Why the hell am I so shy? Jimin wonders managing the words out, “I’m not little,” He says looking at Jungkook with intensity, “You’re just too tall,” He points an accusing towards him, lips forming into an instinctive pout earning a laugh. Jimin belatedly realises he likes the sound of it, Jungkook’s laughter, the thought makes him blush even more, “Y-yah!” Jungkook won’t stop laughing, Jimin doesn’t want him too. “Okay, alright sweet cheeks I’m too tall,” Jimin’s redder than a tomato and he hates it, hates how his heart is beating is too fast.

“I-I’m going to change!” He shouts walking past Jungkook in powerful strides eyes darting back and forth in nervousness, the alpha laughs running towards him with small steps, “Sure, let me show you your room sweetheart,” Jimin blushes again pushing him with his shoulder, “M-my name is Jimin!” Jungkook smirks, “Sure, Jimin,” Why does the way he say his name sets his heart on fire, why does it start beating faster? Jimin rolls his eyes following Jungkook inside.

By the time that they had arrived, it was late night so Jimin and Jungkook were to go to sleep. The omega was glad Jungkook hadn’t forced himself on him, he didn’t think he would be able to bear it. What Jimin found surprising was that Jungkook was respectable of his privacy he even arranged a separate room for him. Jimin had never encountered an alpha like that and to say he was astonished was an understatement, “Jimin hyung, well you see my parents asked us to accompany them for lunch tomorrow, would you like to go?” Jungkook rubbed the back of his neck nervously stammering, the site was endearing, “Y-you don’t have to-,” Jimin started giggling, Jungkook looked so endearing that it was terribly hard to stop himself, “of course I’ll go Jungkook-shhi, why would I evade a meeting with my in-laws?” Jungkook smiled, “Y-yeah, sorry, please call me Jungkook, hyung.” Jimin nodded closing the door behind him as Jungkook walked down hallways whistling with his hands in his pockets. The picture was engraved in his mind and Jimin felt he wanted to treasure it, not let it decompose in his mind.

Till late at night, Jimin painted a picture holding back his tears, he painted a picture of a man surrounded by darkness walking towards the light. When the picture was finally done, Jimin burst into tears, he cried because he imagined the person to be his father who walked away, his only source of light left in the world after the death of his mother, he walked away leaving Jimin to search blindly for something, anything in the pitch black darkness. And Jimin cried because it was true, his father was never a part of his life. He imagined falling irrevocably in love with Jungkook only for him to walk away. Because that’s what everyone did, they walked away, his mother did, his father did and Jungkook would soon. It was only a matter of time before he did.

He painted another picture, the same exact picture of Jungkook walking down the hallway. The omega hoped one day he could paint his face one day but Jimin did not want to be rude and do it without permission. Jimin drifted off to sleep with tears in his eyes, nightmares clenching his h