saudade (it's still you)
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Yujin decided to ride her motorcycle again this time, informing Yena about it and would like to go to the school with her. And her best friend was so ecstatic to know, asking that they should meet again at the Starbucks where they met last Monday.


This time, Yujin didn’t eat breakfast—deciding to get herself some coffee instead, not really hungry or have the appetite to chew and eat something to satisfy her non-existent hunger.


She bought herself a coffee, and then another one for Sakura—the latter asked her to buy her again and as a kind friend Yujin is, she just complied, pitying her friend and even bought an energy drink at the nearby convenience store, also yogurt drinks.


The couple also bought some coffee there before they drove to school with Yujin trailing behind and Chaewon would occasionally throw a playful middle finger or finger heart at her which made the younger laugh.


Soon enough, they reached the school fast—Yujin and Yena parked their vehicles nicely beside each other and the three of them went to their usual spot, the others already there with Nako suddenly appearing out of nowhere, hair messy, clothes wrinkled, and obviously ran towards the school.


Usual morning gossips and short talks while sipping on their coffees or yogurts started and then when the bell rang, they all parted ways just like that with a promise of meeting each other again to eat lunch all together.


Yujin almost had a heart attack when Yuna suddenly appeared beside her, greeting her with her usual signature bright grin and loud voice. “Good morning, Yujin-ssi!” She chirped, and the older jolted, taking a deep breath as she felt her heart jump out of surprise. “I hope you slept well!”


Oh, she did not. She only managed to sleep for three hours because of overthinking and her rare insomnia kicking in last night. Too many thoughts that kept her wide awake.


“Fine,” She instead lied through her teeth, continuing walking towards their classroom and paid not much attention to Yuna beside her.


The younger girl then started to animatedly blabber about how excited she is for the filming, especially knowing that Yujin is one of the main leads—she also muttered about how she and Minjoo would look great together, and they will definitely get the highest mark for that project.


Yujin almost choked at that.


Classes went through smoothly but Yujin is the problem—she’s dazed throughout, the words that the professor would say would just enter her ear, pass through her brain, and then exit to the other ear. She’s distracted, zoning out and in a very deep thought.


Her seatmate, Yuna, noticed it immediately—always trying to nudge her to snap her out of it. Yujin is thankful for her small gesture but in the end, after a few minutes—she would just drown into her own thoughts again, only for Yuna to bring her back to herself again.


She never learned or understood anything from her morning classes.


Lunch came by, and the squad happily ate their food, starving but Yujin still doesn’t have the appetite to eat anything at all—she just ate three spoons of kimchi fried rice and that’s just it—she ended up picking it up and playing with her food as she stared at it, zoning out.


Hyewon and Nako fought, at whoever gets to eat the leftover and unfortunately for the both of them, Chaewon beat them up on getting the food from Yujin. The rest of their lunch was full of bickering but Yujin was still in daze.


Yena noticed it, asking her if she’s doing good and Yujin nodded, giving her friend a small smile, lying that she stayed up late watching dramas. It was just a half-lie, and as expected, they all bought it—cooing at their youngest and Hyewon even treated her another glass of her favorite iced tea.


And Yujin just found herself sitting in the classroom, trying her best to listen to the discussion but failed to do so. She grew anxious and nervous each minute passed—as the afternoon got deeper.


She didn’t even realize that hours already passed by and she’s already attending her last class of the day. She lifted her wrist up, checking the time on her watch and it’s almost four. If she’s not wrong, this class will end up on four thirty.


The professor finally bid her goodbye and Yujin was then snapped back into reality, hastily fixing her things and dumping it into her bag—literally rushing outside, not even letting Yuna finish saying her goodbye. It was rude but Yujin was just nervous.


Since the squad’s schedules every Friday didn’t really match up, they don’t usually meet up together after classes and they don’t have any plans for this day either.


After grabbing some of her things from the locker and getting her helmet, she walked towards the parking lot, settling at the corner—near her motorcycle and found that Yena’s bike was already long gone. Well, their classes ended early today. She and Chaewon probably went home already, as did Sakura and Nako.


She silently waited there, sipping on her yogurt, and watched some students appear from the school grounds, finally going home after a tiring school day—some were in a group, some were in duo and gossiping, some were alone. And for a second, Yujin was suddenly curious about their plans, are they going to go home? Maybe hang-out since it’s Friday? Who knows…


A gust of wind passed by, and Yujin shivered a bit, hugging her jacket closer to her for more warmth—winter season just barely ended so it’s still chilly, the wind is still cold but not freezing.


When she checked her watch, she saw the time was already five and Yujin hoped that Hyewon would exit on the main school gates instead of here or else, she might get interrogated.


Another batch of few students appeared from the school, walking to their own cars, bicycle, motorcycle—some walked and Hyewon didn’t appear, so it’s safe to assume that she exited at the main gate instead. After all, her friend is always the first one who rushes out of the classroom so she can go home early.


Her muscles tensed, and Yujin took a few deep breaths as she waited, kicking some lone pebbles scattered around the pavement. Biting her inner cheek as she anxiously waited.


“Yujin-unnie,” And Yujin’s heart, for a second, stopped. She immediately turned around, and a smile instantly crept up on her lips as a greeting when she spotted a very familiar face. She watched the woman who called her skip her way towards her. “Hey...”


“Hi there,” Yujin mumbled, a little too shy and awkward. “Wonyoung. It’s been a while?” She added, and the younger woman flashed a charming grin at her. Wonyoung and her are sharing the same apartment building so they kind of knew each other, and living on the same floor too. They aren’t particularly close but they are close enough to greet each other, and have a small conversation.


Wonyoung nodded in agreement, hugging her books closer to her. “Are you going home now?” She then asked instead, and Yujin shook her head at the question.


“No, I’m waiting for someone.” Truthfully, Yujin answered with a smile.


The younger woman nodded again, flashing another sweet smile. “Well, I’ll get going then! It’s nice to see you again, unnie.” She bid herself goodbye, already walking. Yujin gave her a short wave, and responded with, ‘go home safely!’.


When Wonyoung was far enough, she took a deep breath, and continued waiting for the person she was supposed to meet. And it didn’t take long because after a minute—


“Yujin,” Familiar. It was soft, melodic, but yet—deeply rasp, in a good way.


And as expected but unwelcomed, flutters filled her chest—heart inside rattling in millions of emotions. Oh, how she missed that voice… calling her name so softly like that.


Unfortunately for her, it still has the same effect on her. Intense, and annoyingly good.


Yujin froze for a bit, a little bit caught off-guard but she twisted her body to face the newcomer anyway. She was struck when she turned and realized how close they were to each other. Not that Yujin was uncomfortable in a bad way, but rather—she felt awkward. This is probably the closest distance they had after almost two years ago.


“Hey, you came,” Yujin managed to find her voice back, croaking out some few words—she tried to snap out of it, compose herself, and not malfunction.


Her expression softened, “Minjoo-unnie.” Her name rolling off Yujin’s tongue satisfyingly, she has been itching to utter that name for a while already but she couldn’t just find the courage to say it, even in her dreams.


Minjoo’s lips curved up to form a smile, a giggle was then let out. “Of course,” She responded gently, her eyes averting for a while. “And you waited.” Added by Minjoo, her voice is lower than usual—it’s more like a relieved whisper.


Forcing a smile, Yujin nodded. “I’m patient, as you can see.” She playfully replied, before shifting the topic, scratching her cheek. “Anyway, I-Uh, I’m sure you know why I want to have a chat with you,” She then started off, obviously tense, and straight to the point.


Nodding, Minjoo gave her a tight smile. “Yeah,” She shortly mumbled, her hand moving to her hair and slid her fingers down, fixing her slightly messy beige hair. And Yujin knows it’s her habit, an attractive habit that Yujin managed to catch from Minjoo herself. “That can be the only reason.”


The addition made Yujin even more awkward that she is, clearing and her eyes darted on the vending machine nearby. “Hold on, it just feels stuffy here—let me just get us some drinks.” She said, and Minjoo nodded. And like her permission was then granted, Yujin excused herself.


While waiting, Yujin took that time to take deep breaths and encourage herself not to look like a malfunctioning mess in front of Minjoo. She took the chocolate drinks from the machine, and walked back to the spot where Minjoo was—the latter was just staring at Yujin’s blue bike with a small smile on her face.


“New one?” Minjoo blurted out when the taller woman halted beside her with enough distance. Yujin glanced at her motorcycle, and slowly nodded.


“I got it last year, a present—since Duffy gave up completely after Nako crashed it on the tree,” Yujin snickered, shaking her head at the memory but it’s all good now. Duffy was her scooter that she used ever since she was in highschool.


“Does it have a name too?” The older yet shorter woman then asked innocently, genuinely curious and Yujin found herself nodding.


“Sky.” She answered softly.


Minjoo chuckled at that, and Yujin was nearly swayed—she then handed the drink to the woman. “H-Here,” She muttered, and the older woman looked at it for a bit before she reached it, grabbing it from Yujin and their hands touched for a bit. There were sparks, and the younger shrugged it off.


“It’s the only chocolate drink available there.” Yujin added, and uncapped the bottle, taking a sip and Minjoo did the same, glancing up at the taller woman with her usual small smile.


“It’s alright. Thank you for this,” The law student said with a smile and took a small sip.


There was a comfortable silence between them, the atmosphere wasn’t that heavy either—just a little bit awkward as the both of them turned away from each other, facing the parking lot as they played with the chilled bottle of the chocolate drink.


“So, uhh,” Yujin stammered, bringing her hand to her nape, rubbing it. “I just don’t want us to be awkward when the filming starts…” She murmured, chewing her lower lip.


A chuckle was then heard from Minjoo. “I already know that. But I’m not unhappy that you wanted to meet with me to discuss this stuff, knowing that… y’know. You’re being

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