5:44AM.

She thought she had been quiet enough but apparently not, because the first thing she saw when she walked through the lounge room door was Seulgi rubbing her eyes and yawning and saying: ‘Hey.’

‘Hey.’

‘What’s that?’

Irene glanced down at the letter and folded it away and shrugged. ‘Nothing,’ she mumbled. ‘Just some dumb piece of paper. When did you wake up?’

‘Like, literally just now.’

Irene nodded. Seulgi motioned for her to sit by the window again and she did. It was not quite light outside yet and they could hear people shifting about downstairs and occasionally a cough or footsteps or Yeri shouting and then silence again. Seulgi leant her head on Irene’s shoulder and took her hand gently.

‘What?’ Irene said.

‘What what. I didn’t say anything.’

‘I know, but—’

‘I just wanna stay like this for a while. Is that okay?’

Irene turned to her and brushed a hair out of her face and smiled. ‘Yeah,’ she said.

‘Irene.’

‘What?’

‘When we get out of here, do you wanna go for a meal?’

‘That was my idea.’

‘Yeah, but…’

‘Not immediately.’

‘No.’

‘I need to sleep.’

‘I meant just in general.’

‘Then yeah,’ Irene said. ‘A meal sounds good.’

‘But you’re paying.’

‘Why?’

‘You make more money than me. And about eight hours ago you said I was a possible suspect in an ongoing murder investigation. That’s a bit insulting, really.’

‘I was just refusing to take any possible leads off the table.’

‘Yeah yeah.’

‘I mean it. All I was doing was making sure that—’

‘Irene.’

‘What?’

Seulgi smiled and leant her head on Irene’s shoulder again. ‘Shut up,’ she said softly. ‘Let me get my beauty sleep.’

When Yeri found them it had just gone six in the morning and a thin and pink newborn sun was coming up in the east like a crimson maw and there was the narrowest stylus of golden sunlight squared through the windows in knives that shifted across the room like sentient things with the slow crowning of the day. Yeri took one look at them there, Seulgi asleep again and snoring softly against Irene’s shoulder, Irene in and out of sleep herself, and cleared . They looked like two strange pink angels, leptosomic by the far window and haloed as they were in the coronation of new sunlight behind them. Irene rubbed her eyes and looked at her.

‘Is now a bad time?’ Yeri said.

‘No. What time is it?’

‘Like, six twenty. Lisa’s back. And she’s brought guests.’

‘Guests?’

‘The five-o.’

‘Oh,’ Irene said. ‘Where are they?’

‘Downstairs. Figured I’d just come up and tell you. They’re probably gonna want to question you. Both of you.’

‘Yeah. Have they questioned you?’

‘Not yet. Think they’re busy slapping a pair of handcuffs on Sooyoung and Rosie.’

‘Right.’

Yeri was quiet. There was an awkwardness to her that felt alien and it unnerved Irene a slight. And then she even smiled.

‘What?’

‘Man,’ Yeri said, ‘you two are cute. Kinda making me jealous. Just a little.’

‘Well, I’m a lucky woman. But it hasn’t always been cute or straightforward. Trust me. And I’m sure you’ll find someone one day. You’re, what, twenty? Twenty-one? Got your whole life ahead of you. Don’t worry about that right now. Live your life. Meet new people, date who you like, stuff like that. That’s what university is for – discovering yourself. You just have to—’

‘Spare me the relationship guru , yeah? It was just an offhanded compliment. Jesus, next you’ll be calling out my star signs and reading my palms.’

‘Sorry.’

Yeri stuffed her hands in her pockets. As if for once in her life she had no idea what to say. She made a whistling sound with her lips and eventually settled on, ‘What a day, huh?’

‘Yeah. That’s a good way to sum it up.’

‘Actually, let me sum it up properly. Sum up everyone down there. Sooyoung’s a serial murderer and also a psychopath, which I feel is still something we’ve overlooked. The whole psychopath bit, that is. I mean, she poisoned the ing stew, Irene. She could’ve easily killed every single person in that room, and I was first in the queue. I was, like, half a second from a mouthful of cyanide chowder and a one-way trip to Palookaville. And if I’m going to go out young, I’m making sure it’s with hookers and blow. Plenty of blow. Not choking to death on a piece of poisoned chicken. But whatever, I guess. What’s done is done. And then there’s Rosie, an attempted murderer. And Mr Jae is also an attempted murderer – well, was, the poor bastard. Wheein went back on her business promise to Mr Jae and betrayed him, forcing him into this position in the first place and potentially threatening to put him out of a job. Jennie is a kleptomaniac thief who was entirely willing to steal from a possibly senile seventy-year-old man. Lisa did…what, exactly?’

‘Nothing. Well, apart from thinking she’s smarter than she is.’

‘Okay, so she’s the only innocent one?’

‘What about Mr Jang? And Jisoo?’

‘Oh. Yeah. To be honest with you I genuinely forgot about them. No offence to them or anything, of course. Well, I guess they’re both out of a job now, so… to be them, I suppose.’

‘And Wendy too.’

‘Yeah, but I kinda grouped her in with you and Seulgi. Like a sort of deal.’

‘Please don’t say it like that.’

‘Oh, I didn’t mean—’ she saw the smile on Irene’s face and said, ‘Whatever.’

‘And you,’ Irene said.

‘What?’

‘You’re innocent too.’

‘Of course. I’m just an , but that’s not a crime, is it?’

‘No. It’s not.’

‘Well, there you go, then. Honestly, though, you did good. I’m the last person to give compliments to anyone, but you did good. I don’t think the rest of us idiots would have been able to solve it without you. But then I guess we would’ve just waited for the police to investigate it, so the end result is the same anyway. But hey, this was more fun. So…yeah. Good work.’

‘It was nothing,’ Irene said. ‘You don’t have to anywhere near as smart as some people think for this job. Trust me on that one. Fifty percent of it is finding things through sheer luck and the other fifty percent is tricking people into revealing the things that you don’t find. Things that they probably shouldn’t admit. And a lot of that involves lying. Like tonight, for example.’

‘What did you lie about?’

‘The will, for starters.’

‘What?’

‘I talked about all the people that are in Mr Kim’s will – Jennie and Jisoo being the two notable ones. Rosie being missing from it, giving her motive, thinking she was about to be out of a job and knowing she had no financial compensation in sight without Mr Jae’s assistance.’

‘Yeah.’

‘That was the first lie. None of their names were on it. In fact, there was only one name on the whole will and it wasn’t any of those three. I honestly don’t even know if he was going to fire her at all. Maybe that termination notice in his study room drawer was blank for a reason. Maybe it really was for Jennie. Maybe it was for nobody, just a spare lying around for whatever reason. I don’t know. But it was right there when I read that none of them were on the will that I started putting the pieces together. It’s all about connecting the dots. If Rosie were on the will, I think that would’ve given her less motive, not more, because of the slayer rule and because it would have been too obvious. And when I saw that her name wasn’t on there, and I remembered the blonde hair in the study, it all clicked into place. But I couldn’t just come out and say that.’

‘Why not?’ Yeri said.

‘It’s about reading people,’ said Irene. ‘I said she was on the will, lied to her, pushed her as hard as I thought I could. Got her to talk without putting her on the defensive. I managed to confirm that she knew nothing about the will by lying to her and gauging her response to that lie, to see if she noticed it at all, or made any indication that she knew I was lying. See, it’s all about that part right there – about pushing people. About judging people’s tolerances, their body language, how comfortable they are, things like that. Like I said, it’s not about being smart at all. It’s about being in the right place at the right time and paying attention to your surroundings.’

Yeri groaned.

‘What?’

‘Please,’ she said, ‘don’t give me that humble pie bull. If there’s one thing I hate worse than people who are too cocky, it’s people who are too humble. Makes me physically ill just listening to it.’

‘Alright. But I was just—’

‘Yeah, I get it. I’ll see you downstairs.’

‘Yeri.’

She turned back, mild annoyance on her face.

‘There’s one thing I can’t get out of my head. One thing that’s still bugging me.’

‘I’m sure you’re gonna tell me in incredible detail now, aren’t you?’

Irene smiled. ‘You know, your standoffishness is kind of endearing.’

‘God, please don’t get sappy on me all of a sudden.’

‘I wasn’t going to.’

‘Go on, then. What’s the thing bugging you?’

‘Why did he actually invite us along?’ Irene said. ‘I feel like we’ve all just glossed over the fact that this…well, it isn’t normal. I mean, I don’t think it is. What do each of us have in common? I’m a P.I, Seulgi’s an artist, Wheein’s an investor, Lisa’s about to become CEO. Wendy was a journalist and an author. Well, still is, I suppose. Why did he invite us all? It certainly wasn’t for business. I can’t wrap my head around that. And it’s not just that, either. All the stuff he kept saying. “Where there’s a will, there’s a way.” Leaving his will in that box for someone to find. Putting all those documents in his safe. Stuff like that. As if he was doing things on purpose. As if he wanted me to find it. Like a breadcrumb trail for me. Did he know about me and Seulgi, too? Is that why he invited me along? Or was it a distraction? Surely he knew he was going to die.’

Yeri laughed.

‘What?’

‘You can’t see the forest for the trees.’

‘What?’

‘I think this is what the good folks in the literary world call a “red herring.”’

‘I don’t follow.’

‘Listen,’ Yeri said, ‘my granduncle was…eclectic. He did things his own way. I might’ve been estranged but I wasn’t stupid. The will thing is just one of those riddles he liked. He gave them to me all the time, like a big kid or something. Wanted me to figure things out. The documents were in his safe because, well…that’s where documents belong. This whole dinner is just one of those things. Yeah, we’re all misfits and yeah it doesn’t add up but, hey, sometimes things don’t add up. I feel like you’re so obsessed with the idea that everything and everyone has to have a mystery to it that you’re convinced my granduncle was plotting some huge conspiracy or something. Or like he planned his own death. Some crazy like that. Maybe that’s why Seulgi was so angry at you earlier. You can’t see what’s right there to see. You’re missing the simple.’

‘Which is?’

‘He was a strange old man that wanted to invite a bunch of people to dinner.’

‘Explain Seulgi, then.’

‘I guess he just liked her artwork and wanted to say thank you.’

‘Liked it enough to sell it.’

‘What?’

‘I don’t think he was going to say thank you. Or buy any more artwork. I didn’t see her paintings in his room upstairs.’

Yeri laughed again. ‘Oh,’ she said. ‘Well I guess he didn’t like it that much, then. But yeah, the general point stands. Maybe he just wanted to be nice. Same with Wendy. He didn’t like her writing and he was gonna kick her from her publishing contract but he still understood that she was a journalist and let her work on a piece on him and wanted to invite her along for something to eat. Yeah he was a bit of a sometimes but he had a lot of empathy, did my granduncle. A lot of empathy. I know, I know – rich people aren’t people. Down with the system. But still. He kept people close to him. I don’t think there’s any bigger thing you’re missing.’

‘Do you really believe that?’

‘Do you not?’

Irene smiled and shrugged. ‘After today, I’m not sure what I believe,’ she said. She hesitated again. As if unsure of whether or not it would be wise to tell the truth to Yeri when even Seulgi was not aware of it. But something compelled her to continue, if only for the sake of clarity. She took the folded letter out of her pocket and held it up and said: ‘I found this.’

‘What is it?’

‘It’s a letter from Mr Kim. I found it upstairs in his collection room earlier. Something had been bugging me all day and I just knew I had to figure out what it was. And then I found this, and it explained it all.’

‘Explained all what?’

‘All of this – everything that happened – it was his plan.’

Yeri laughed. ‘What?’ she said.

Irene unfolded the letter and began reading. She read the first two paragraphs without looking up. When she finally paused long enough to look at Yeri in the doorway Yeri hadn’t moved or reacted at all. Irene continued.

 ‘Anyway, I’ve rambled enough. I deem this my greatest achievement, unless by some minor miracle I am still alive and my judgement of everybody I have invited along today – yourself and Seulgi notwithstanding – is entirely incorrect. But I don’t think it will be. Will it? Peace out, bro. P.S. Tell—’

‘Tell Yeri she’s the best grandniece ever,’ Yeri said.

‘Yeah, exactly that. Wait, what? How the did you—’

‘Know what he’d written?’

‘Yeah.’

Yeri laughed again. ‘C’mon,’ she said.

‘What?’

‘You don’t actually think he wrote that, do you? You think he wrote, “Peace out, bro,” at the bottom of it? Or wrote a whole crazy letter explaining that he orchestrated his own death? Or that he wrote “Tell Yeri she’s the best grandniece ever?”’

Irene was silent.

‘I wrote it.’

‘What?’

Yeri took a fountain pen from her pocket and waved it about nonchalantly. ‘Stole it from Wheein’s drawer when we raided her room earlier,’ she said. ‘It’s a beauty, this one. Took a few cursive classes in high school and figured I’d put them to good use, so I wrote that bad boy.’

Irene was silent again. Any possible thing to say felt unsuitable and so she settled eventually on: ‘What?’

‘Yeah, I wrote it about an hour ago while you were busy babysitting your girlfriend up here and stashed it in my granduncle’s collection room upstairs. Figured you were so pigeonholed into thinking that there had to be some great mystery that you’d go snooping through his belongings looking for the lost treasure of ing El Dorado or something. And lo and behold, ya did.’

‘I—’

‘Sorry for making you think he was some supergenius mastermind or whatever. That was a bit ed up of me, I guess. And I dunno if he had brain swelling. I made that part up too, for dramatic effect.’

‘What if I hadn’t have found it?’

‘Then I’d have just gone upstairs and torn it up, I guess. Didn’t really think that far ahead. Just thought it’d be a cool prank, you know?’

‘So this…’

‘Fake, yeah. I wrote it.’

‘But why?’

Yeri laughed. ‘You sound like I’ve just killed your cat or something,’ she said. And when she realised that wasn’t a sufficient answer she folded her arms and leant against the doorfame and said, ‘Look, all day long you’ve been caught up in this crazy idea that everything has to have, like, sixteen different meanings to it. And I don’t just mean about the killing and whatever, I mean with it all. With Seulgi, too. Far be it from me to a ing relationship counsellor or to into your , but yeah. I figured I’d teach you a lesson.’

‘What lesson is that, then?’

‘Well, the moral of the story is this: sometimes, things are just as they seem. People, too. Not everyone is a murderer, and not everything is two-faced. Stop being so goddamn cynical all the time. Yeah?’

‘I—’

‘Capeesh?’

Irene smiled. ‘Capeesh,’ she said.  And then, quieter, momentarily defeated, almost fearful of the answer: ‘Why are you actually here?’

‘What?’

‘The whole “there’s no deeper motive” sort of explains us, as hard as it might be to believe right now. Even explains Seulgi, I suppose. And Wendy. Mr Kim just wanted to invite a bunch of people. But why did you come along today?’

‘Is this a philosophical question, or a real one?’

‘A real one.’

‘My granduncle invited me,’ she said. ‘Told me to stay a couple nights. Played a lot of snakes and ladders, tried to teach me some life lessons about maturing and understanding what’s right and what’s not and how to get ahead in life. Told me he reminded me of him at my age. Told me to look after my health first and foremost. Told me that eggs were the best cheap source of protein because scrambled egg takes like three minutes to prepare and you can buy them thirty at a time for six thousand won. Told me that oatmeal is the best breakfast because it’s slow release carbs and will keep you feeling full for half the day, and that it’s even better with peanut butter and cinnamon. Told me the best way to save money at university is to buy a slow cooker and prepare a week’s worth of meals in one go and freeze them all as portions. Told me that boys only want one thing and that’s to get in your pants, and they’ll do anything – anything – to get that. Told me to always skip my lectures but never skip my seminars because they secretly take attendance for them and report it back to your faculty of education. Told me that you should always tape a plastic bag over the smoke alarm when you’re lighting a joint to stop it from going off. Told me that the best place to hide your stash is inside an air freshener because it hides that super strong weed smell. Asked me about the little side hustle I’d got working at one of the gift shops on campus. Asked me if I’d found anyone I was interested in. Asked if I could bring her here for dinner sometime so he could meet her. Asked what I wanted for my birthday. Asked what I wanted to do with my life once I’d finished my degree. That’s about it. The more I think about it the more I realise that the reason he quietly cut off my university funding was because he knew I’d gotten that little job on the side and he really did want me to fend for myself. He wanted me to be independent, because he saw himself in me and he saw potential and he believed in what I could become. It wasn’t him hating me or growing sick of me or anything. It’s taken all the crazy that happened today for me to realise that if anything it’s the opposite of that. I promise.’

Irene nodded. The expression on Yeri’s face seemed to change very suddenly to a solemn sort of sadness. ‘I mean it,’ she said. ‘That’s literally it. There’s no grand conspiracy or plot or anything, much as you’d probably like there to be. Just a lonely old man trying to reconnect with his grandniece. The only real family he had left.’

‘I’m sorry about what happened.’

For a moment Yeri looked fit to cry. ‘Yeah,’ she said. ‘Me too. I’m gonna miss him, the crazy old fool. I’m gonna miss him an awful lot.’

‘Hey, Yeri.’

She turned back from the door again. Seulgi had not stirred at all and now Irene was almost smiling.

‘What?’ Yeri said.

‘You know what I said about the will? About lying?’

‘Sure.’

‘About there actually only being one name on it?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Well,’ Irene said with a grin, and said no more.