Chapter 17
The First Knot

                The surface of their hands grazed over each other’s softly, time and time again.  The tingt of pink on their cheeks was only turning brighter.  Their eyes wandered, shyly searching for a place of interest to focus on.  Nevertheless, the smiles on their face told it all.
            
   They were so in love.

                An innocent love that they thought would never be reciprocated.  A precious love that they never thought they
would have.   It was so much like a sweet dream they don’t want to wake up from.

                But it’s not a dream.  This was not a dream.

                This was their love ― Yoona and Seohyun’s treasure.

                Some things are best kept quiet, said by many wise persons, but there are some certain things that always need to be said.  Because you never know what the outcome may be.  And because of that, the risk should be taken.  It was a life changing moment, and the drift on that turn you made could have been bad or for the better.

                Yoona did not regret her decision.  She had crossed the finish line by taking that risk of voicing her encaged feelings to her best friend, to the one she loved so much.  Victoriously, she had won over the award, Seohyun’s heart.

                If she hadn’t already before.

                “I love you, too.”

                Three words, eight letters…erased all of the doubts.

                It was the simple conclusion to everything.  But Yoona couldn’t believe it.

                It sounded almost too perfect to be true.  Although as soon as she caught the look full of honesty within the gentle eyes staring back at her, she smiled.  It was true.

                No explanation was needed because it was all too clear.  In fact, it had always been.  Yoona was just too dense of an idiot to ever notice.  But then again, they were both fools.

                Fools in love.

                Yoona took her beloved’s hand into her own, intertwining her fingers into a perfect fit with Seohyun’s as she swing their arms back and forth.  It never felt so right holding someone’s hand as it was now.

                “I love you,” she whispered simply.

                “Me, too,” Seohyun timidly responded, no longer holding back on her part.

                Hand in hand, they walk down the school hall, joyously smiling in satisfaction as they went to topic after topic about random happenings in their life.  It was only until the first bell rang that they realize they would have to part ways to their classes.
            
    “I’ll come pick you up at lunch,” Yoona promised, hesitant on letting go of her partner’s warm hands as they stood in front of the older girl’s classroom.

                “Okay.  I’ll be waitin-”

                “Ahem…”

               The low toned cough interrupted their sweet moment as they immediately released each other’s hands in reflex and self-consciousness.

                “Don’t make Seo-sshi late because of your clinginess, Im-sshi,” their professor joked, winking to Yoona as he passed by her.

                She shivered at the crooked twitch of his eye and resumed to recover her sight with the beautiful angel in front of her.

                “I’ll see you later, unnie.”

                “Yeah.”

                Yoona watched as Seohyun skipped away as she smiled in content.

                Yes, that cute person was her girlfriend.
 

★☆★              

                
“Aish, I don’t want to do this…” The taller girl complained, tossing the papers aside as she stretched her arms above her head.

                “Yah!  Secretary Choi Sooyoung, are you expecting me to finish all of this by myself?” The older one scolded, but did not bother to nudge her friend back to work.  She, instead, continued to grumble, “All of those food I feed you, wasted.  Completely wasted.”

                “Now, now, relax.  Of course I wouldn’t leave them all to you.  I had been quite an excellent secretary and called a helper for you earlier.  She will be here soon,” Sooyoung snickered, getting up from her seat and skipped playfully to the refrigerator.

                Yuri perked an eyebrow, but continued to concentrate on the work before her, “Who?”

                “Who else?”

                “…No seriously, who?” Impatience was getting the best of her and the stress from the company’s work load was definitely not helping.

                “Your personal assistant.”

                Yuri thought for a moment, removing her eyes from the whiteness laid out on the table.  She scratched her head, glanced back at her housemate, and eventually caught the mischievous smirk attached on the girl’s face.  Of course, who else would it be other than her.

                “That’s it.  I’m firing you.”

                “Oh come on, Yuri-ah.  It wouldn’t be that bad,” Sooyoung ran back to her friend, sat down on the sofa behind the girl, and began to massage Yuri’s shoulders.

                “It wouldn’t be that bad?  Are you kidding me?” Yuri slapped off the hands on her shoulders, giving Sooyoung a strange, bewildered stare, “She confessed to me, Sooyoung!”

                “So what?” the taller girl shrugged coolly, then scoffed, “What, is it a new trend to ignore people when they just dig their guts out to honestly tell you of their feelings?  Did Jessica do that to you?”

                “N-No, I…I didn’t mean it that way,” Yuri sighed, resting the side of her face on the coffee table.  “It’s just…we’re going to be so awkward.”

                “It’s human nature, Yuri-ah.  But in reality, it’s just you.  I’m sure this is not the first time someone, or a girl for that matter, confesses to you, am I right?” Sooyoung patted her friend’s back, “Relax.  You have the whole space for yourself.  Take the time to talk to her.  Even if you like her or don’t share the same feelings, you need to tell her.  You don’t want what happened to you and Jessica to repeat again, now do you?”

                Yuri remained quiet, trapped in her thoughts and the misery of her own past.  Sooyoung’s right.  She had to give an answer regardless of what it might be.

                “I have to leave in a few minutes,” Sooyoung voice, checking her phone for any new message.

                “Where are you going?”

                “A date.”

                “With who!?” Yuri perked up in curiosity, eyes begging to know the details.

                “Lee…”

                Yuri nodded enthusiastically, drawing closer as she waited for the name.

                “Sunny.”

                The light from Yuri’s face escaped her as her tan skin turned back to what its original tone.

                “It’s a fake relationship,” Sooyoung revealed loosely, “Don’t worry too much about it.”

                “What do you mean?  Wait, why?  How?”

                “I can’t tell you the full details until…well…everything are ‘solved.’  All you need to know right now is that Sunny and I are dating,” Sooyoung vaguely explained.

                “Does she like you?”

                Sooyoung shook her head, smiling pensively.

                “How about you?”

                The taller girl hesitated, grooming back her long hair as she turned away to avoid Yuri’s suspicious, piercing stare.

                “We still have neighbors so try to be quiet.  Gag yourself if you have to.”

                Yuri tilted her head and looked at the smirking Sooyoung with a puzzled look.  She did not understand the odd and random statement that, in fact, did not even answer her previous question.

                “Don’t go into the wrong room.  And make sure you clean after yourself.  Use prote-…wait I guess you don’t need it,” Sooyoung continued, her grin growing wider along with Yuri’s eyes, “Movies tell me that when people get into ‘the mood’ they become a bit wil-”

                “Wow there!  Hold it!  What are you talking about!?” Yuri waved her arms in their air, almost attempting to cup her hand onto Sooyoung’s big mouth and maybe ‘accidentally’ land a slap.

                “You and Victoria, of course.  Hey, anything can happen.  Movies taught me that, too.”

                Yuri glared at her friend suspiciously, asking for an answer she already knew of, “What kind of movies do you watch?”

                “Educational movies,” Sooyoung smiled slyly, “Want to join?  You could learn something useful.”

                “No, thank you.”

                “Well, your choice.  I’ll be going now.”

                Sooyoung strapped on her heels and grabbed her keys spinning the chain before tossing the set into her coat’s pocket.  She turned the knob and stepped out the door, but was momentarily held back by Yuri’s words.

                “You better not hurt Sunny.”

                The tall girl hid her reaction and replied with her back turned away.

                “I won’t.”

                She closed the door then dashed off, heart heavy and mind confused.

                “Of course, I won’t…”
 

☆★☆

                “So you don’t mind?”

                Jessica shook her head, glancing into the enthusiastic eyes of her younger sibling before knocking back onto her soft pillow.

                Krystal, on the other hand, flailed her arms up high and skipped around her older sister’s room upon hearing the much appreciated approval.  She shouted her sayings of gratitude over and over, hugging and kissing Jessica before storming outside of the ice princess’ room.

                The blonde girl giggled as she listened to the dispersion of the excited cries then went back to reviewing her appointments.

                Jessica found no reason to decline Krystal’s desperate wish to have her friends over on Friday.  Ever since they moved into their new apartment, it was only twice or thrice that her younger sister had ever found the time to invite her full party to play.  As much as Jessica would love to join in on the fun, she had work to do on that noon and evening.  Unfortunately, in regards to her schedule, her personal plan of meeting Yuri was also delayed.

                The singer had already decided that she was going to go all out with her feelings face-to-face with Yuri ever since their last meeting a couple of nights past.  However, for the next week or so, Jessica’s schedule had been packed with her album promotion live performances and various other commercial offers or magazine photo shoots.  Neither her job nor her company was ever that nice to her to let her off even for just a while (with the exception of her manager who occasionally attempted to bail her out of her misery.)  Whenever Jessica did have one of those rare short breaks, Yuri would still be in the company or Jessica would be sleeping her mind off in preparations for the next hectic day.

                Nevertheless, Jessica would confess to Yuri, and she would do it as soon as possible.  If only the chance would be once again laid out in front of her from within her grasp.

                If only the chance that she had once let go would come traveling back.
 

★☆★

              
  The long hair woman sipped on her hot coffee, warming up her body as she watched the gloomy morning shining its dim light on the busy, crowded streets of Seoul.  The clouds heeded the earth’s cries and gathered together to bring their own tears at any time onto the weeping ground below them.  The young lady traced her finger on the glass window, clearing the opaqueness with half of a heart.  Only half.
              
  “Such a perfect weather for a date,” Sooyoung sarcastically remarked to herself, leaning back to observe the city in front of her.
              
  She stared at the image on the glass that mirrored her missing part and pensively smile at it.  Who would have known that this would lead to what it was now?  Who would have known that this would reopen wounds that were once disclosed?  Who would have known that she would end up feeling this way?  Anyone but her.
              
  Sooyoung had been given up on time after time again in her younger years.  She had been through a love that she knew would not last since the beginning.  She had been through hopelessness and weariness.  This love, she had no intentions to even try to land a step onto that edge of the cliff.  It was too dangerous, too risky.
              
  The young woman shook off the nailing thoughts off her head while gulping down the last bits of her lukewarm drink to sooth her mind.  It tasted like rain to her.

                “Hi, Sooyoungie.  Were you waiting long?”
              
  She looked up at the shorter girl that had just arrived, briefly scanning through the older girl’s movements with her eyes.

                Who would have known she would fall in love with this person?
              
  “Not at all, Sunny Bunny.”

                Anyone but her.
 

☆★☆

              
  The chime of the doorbell alarmed Yuri of a visitor.  The girl finished signing the paper she was working on, dropped the pen, and headed to the door in a rush.  She opened it without a second thought and was greeted by someone she should have expected.
              
  After all, she had been foretold of her appearance.  Nevertheless, preparing herself emotionally was a different case.

                “H-Hi…” Yuri uttered awkwardly.
              
  The latter beamed a smile, a smile that showed like nothing ever happened between them the night before.
              
  “Hello,” Victoria said.
              
  “…Come in.”
              
  Yuri opened the door a little wider and allowed Victoria to casually step into her home.  She noticed the girl had already taken interest in the designs and had already begun to wander around the living room with much curiosity.  Her heart was beating faster.  Being alone with Victoria, Yuri did not know what to say or what to do.  Though, it’s only natural to act that way.
              
  Before she knew it, she was admiring Victoria’s beauty.  It was only the second time that Yuri had witnessed Victoria dressed in some attire other than the formal vest and pencil skirt at the company.  Today, the older girl came casually fitted in skinny jeans, a plain white V-neck shirt, and a fashionable fur coat.  It was simple but it also portrayed a beautiful portrait that Yuri could not help but stare.
              
  “Your apartment is really nice and clean,” Victoria complimented, breaking Yuri’s mind awake.
              
  “T-Thank you,” she stuttered yet again.
              
  “Shall we get started?” Victoria asked, situating herself comfortably on the rug under the coffee table.
              
  “Um…would you like something to drink?”
              
  “Water would be fine,” Victoria answered with a smile.

                Yuri nervously looked at the ground and strutted hastily to the kitchen.  Wiping the beads of sweat on her neck, she took a deep breath before heading back with two cups of water in her hand.
              
  Why was she acting like this?  It was unfathomable to Yuri.
 

★☆★

              
  Swiftly drifting at the curb of the street, Taeyeon sped in her vehicle to her company in haste.  She was already a few minutes late for her appointed recording with Leeteuk today.  Her mind had been way too occupied to remember anything that she had planned for, much to Taeyeon’s concern.

                After parking her car in the guarded back lot of the building, Taeyeon reached for her bag and sprinted to the elevator.  Pressing its button continuously, she waited impatiently before the doors swung opened before her.  Taeyeon stepped in rush, catching some air when she found herself alone in the compacted box moving her up to her destination.  Her phone beeped its alert as she decided to retrieve it from her bag and check its notification.  A smile that was not there since her bad morning finally lit up on her face, shining brightly.
              
  “You have a recording today right?  Do your best!  I can’t wait for your special live stage!  \(^__^)/  Hwaitaeng!”

                A simple message was able to lift her spirits higher than anyone could.  It was a mystery to her, how one person could have this effect on her.  For one moment, she had forgotten her worries, but those short few seconds of bliss quickly dispersed as soon as the elevator opened its door.
              
  A crowd stood blocking the hallway, pushing and shoving each other to land their eyes on the bulletin board.  If Taeyeon wasn’t so late, she would have halted in her steps to glance over at the commotion, but at this time she could not afford to lose any other minute.
              
  She wanted that song to be done.
                
The singer rushed to the studio room, expected to see her sunbae staring at his watch and spinning in a daydream on his chair.  However there was no presence of anyone other than herself.  Taeyeon sighed in relief; maybe she wasn’t the late one.

                Placing her belongings down on a nearby seat, she immediately proceeded to pull out her music sheets.  A satisfying grin appeared on the young girl’s face.  Even now, she was proud of what she had made.

                Taeyeon’s latest composition had finally been completed with melodic scores and just the perfect, emotional lyrics that she had wanted from her work.  One would argue that a masterpiece could not be simply written overnight, but Taeyeon had done just that.  Some would reason that she had become a professional and was able to produce the music with ease, but that was not the case.  She was inspired.  Inspired from the surging feelings within her that night she had spent taking care of the person she loved and that morning being with the same person she treasured.

                Pulling out her phone once again, Taeyeon texted back a few words of gratitude to that person.  Her inspiration, her motivation, her dearest love – Hwang Miyoung.

                “Thank you so much!  I feel pumped now!”

Taeyeon’s fingers froze as she contemplated on the words she was about to typed.  Swallowing away her cowardice, Taeyeon continued on with her message.

“By the way, would you mind meeting up with me at ‘the bench’ in the park later on?  I have something important to tell you.”

                Clicking the send button, Taeyeon felt a strange sense of accomplishment.  She was finally taking her first step.

                Even if it was an assumption, she had a belief that her feelings were not unrequited.  Even if she was afraid of what might become of them both, Taeyeon wanted to tell her friend what she had been hiding.  Even if all of her efforts might be in vain and that her friendship would break, she had to go through with this: her confession.

                Tiffany needed to know.  Taeyeon needed to tell her.

                A banging from the door sounded off followed by an appearance of a panic young man and a bewildered Taeyeon who stared strangely at the other person.  The girl dropped her phone into the bag along with the dorky smile on her face, proceeding to wave at her sunbae.

                “Hi, Leeteuk-oppa.”

                “H-hello t-…there, Tae…” her sunbae replied, breathing heavily.  He hastily searched for a bottle of water and immediately digested half of its contents.  He then faced back to his hoobae again for a proper greeting, “Hi, Taeyeon.  Sorry for being late.”

                “It’s okay, but what’s wrong?” Taeyeon asked in concern, sitting next to the studio manager on the black couch.

                “Did you go inside the company by the back gates?”  He asked suddenly, and then drank the rest of the remains in the plastic container.

                “Yes.  Why?  What happened?” Taeyeon’s curiosity was further driven as she continued to question.

                “Maybe that’s why you haven’t heard anything, yet,” Leeteuk paused, grooming his beardless chin as he pondered of where to start.  He sighed and continued, “The news had been spread to the whole company ever since it was released yesterday.  People are practically blocking most of the hallways in the building and even the entrance, rumoring and discussing the ‘hot’ topic.”

                Taeyeon watched as he stressfully brushed back his hair.  She continued to wait to hear on what she had missed out.

                Leeteuk glanced at Taeyeon momentarily, leaning forward to cup his hands together and placing his chin on his knuckles.  Another sigh escaped.

                “One of our company’s artists had just received criticisms for dating someone of her own gender.”

                That was not what Taeyeon had in mind.  It was not what she had expected.  Not even close.

                “Her activities are, as of now, halted for the time being, until the whole situation dies down.  Well… if it actually does.”

And this…it did more than just shocked her.

                “If she wasn’t already a craze in the public, she definitely would be now.  I heard her girlfriend received awful treatments from the hardcore fans and even the nosy paparazzi.”

                A painful throb and a lost hope, all at once.  Like a knife that had been plunged into her heart and quickly withdrawn mercilessly while taking all of her courage along with it.  All of it, gone.

                “They’re both safe now, but internet bashing is another story.”

                Taeyeon leaned back onto the wall, bringing up her palms to cover her face in distress.  This was what she feared, and although it might not have happened to her, it would someday.  She would not be the only victim, but so would her loved one.

                “What do you think about people like ‘that’…?” Taeyeon crackled in her voice, disgusted at what she called her own kind.

                “Like what?  Homouals?”

                As much as it was the truth, that word stung her veins like a sharp needle.

                “I’m a neutral party.  They’re not,” Leeteuk pointed his thumb to the wall behind him.

                Taeyeon could say no more and only bitterly bit her lips in silence.
 

☆★☆

Victoria examined the paperwork, nodding slowly as she read the company’s data.  Her delicate fingers gently reached for a nearby pen.  She spun the tool in her hand for a while before using it to take notes on a conveniently placed notepad not too far away.  Victoria’s expression dulled for one second as her eyes landed back on the document, but lightened up again as she comprehended the meaning of black print on the page.

Yuri followed every action, not missing a single beat.

Surely, the latter should have noticed by now that the entranced black pearl had been staring at her nonstop, but yet she showed no reaction.  Partially because Victoria had been too concentrated on the assignments to care at this moment or maybe it was simply because she was enjoying the attention.  Whatever the reason was, if anyone was to be left in oblivion, it would definitely been Yuri, whose own purposes she did not understand.

                Being in Jessica’s situation, she finally understood why it was so hard for her friend to deal with being around the person whom she knew bore feelings for her.  Every word said, every action made…they were all under restraints.  She did not want to offend Victoria or hurt her in any way.  It was difficult, but something was different.

                And she knew what it was.

                Yuri didn’t understand whether or not it was Victoria’s confession that had made her think and acted the way she did, but she noticed that she had been stealing glances at the older girl more than she should.  And even thinking about her more.  It was as if she had begun to notice Victoria in a way different of what she used to.  Or rather, she had become more interested in the older girl.

                Yuri was unable to find sleep on that restless night.   The touches that she felt during her short trip to wonderland were only a dream that she wished happen, or so she thought.  Waking up to see Jessica in her arms was always something she desired, and for that one moment, she was satisfied.  However, she wasn’t satisfied enough.  She understood that she was taking advantage of the girl, even though the latter did not seem to mind, but she just couldn’t help herself.  It was the last time that she was going to ever allow herself to be that close to Jessica until she rid of all of these feelings, she swore.  But that night, Jessica was not the only person that bothered her mind.

                “How is your arm?” Victoria finally spoke in the midst of their silence.

                Yuri removed her face from the coffee table and rubbed the back of her head in embarrassment when Victoria turned to look at her.

                “I-It’s fine.  Better,” the younger girl replied, earning a content grin from the latter.

                Victoria immediately went back to the work, ending the conversation as suddenly as she started it.

                Yuri cleared as she observed her useless, daydreaming self compared to her hardworking friend, who was managing most of all her responsibilities.  Maybe a quick meal would help replenish her mind.

                “Let’s take a short break, yeah?

                “Sure…” Victoria replied, her attention was still focused on the laptop screen.

Yuri glanced at the clock on the wall and was surprised at how quick the time had passed.  They had been consecutively digging their heads into black ink for the past three hours and both deserved a time of relaxation, Yuri thought.

“I’ll go make dinner.  You can just leave it and we’ll finish it later.”

“Okay then,” Victoria minimized the windows tabs and re-arranged the scattered documents on table after having reminded the second time to go on break.

She stood up and performed flexible stretches, spreading her legs flat on the ground (each in opposite directions) and turning her body in an inhuman way with ease.

“How did you just do that…?” Yuri, who was watching the whole time, asked in awe.  She found herself admiring yet another great aspect of the older girl.  Even though she was also flexible, herself, she was impressed at what Victoria could do.

“It’s my gift,” Victoria answered simply, “just like you with your humor and fun personalities.”

Yuri giggled at Victoria’s random throw of a compliment on her, “Thanks.”

“Would you like me to help with anything?”

“No, I’m fine.  You’ve been working hard so take a rest.  Nap if you want,” Yuri replied, heading toward the kitchen and began preparing for their small, yet delicious, dinner course.

“It’s alright, but do you mind if I take a look around the house?” Victoria asked, retrieving back her earlier curiosity from the moment she stepped in the luxurious apartment.

“Feel free.”

Victoria enthusiastically hopped around, sight-seeing the spacious living room.  There was not much furniture that filled up the apartment but there was enough to display a great impression upon the onlookers.  What would catch anyone’s eyes the most were not the expensive luxuries, but were instead the simple black-framed photos sitting on the shelf in a particular order.  Well, at least to Victoria they did.

She approached the location attracting her attention and gazed interestingly at all of the photos.  Some were of Yuri and some were of Sooyoung and some were of both.  However, one stood out the most; one that was professionally taken.

The candid shot was captured when Yuri was sitting against a tree in a small garden.  The girl was in her natural appearance, with less make-up or none at all on her face, portraying a simplistic but refined beauty of a young woman maturing in her years.  It was gorgeous.

“Who took this photo for you?” Victoria asked with curiosity, pointing to the photo.

Yuri glanced over her shoulder, removing herself away from her cooking trance momentarily.  She moved back a couple of steps, squinted her eyes, and took a careful look at which one of her pictures collection did Victoria specified.  Of course, it was that one.

“My best friend in high school,” Yuri replied simply, resuming back to her work in the kitchen.

“This was so well taken.  Was it her profession?” Victoria pried on.

“It was only her hobby but she was excellent at it.  Ironically, she wasn’t that comfortable when dealing in front of the camera, but when she has it on her hands, there’s this undesirable bliss on her face.  It’s cute-…”

Yuri let her sentence fall in an awkward tone, realizing that she had said more than necessary.

“Do you have a picture of her?”

“Yea-…”

Again, a slip from the tongue.

Knowing that she would be even more suspicious if she were to flip her answer around, Yuri placed down the plates on the counter and headed to her handbag.  She reached for her wallet and pulled out the photo placed in the compact pouch.  It was their first piece of memory together, an evidence of their friendship.  That’s right; Yuri had always kept it near her, despite how much it hurt her too look back in remembrance.

Yuri handed the small picture to Victoria who curiously retrieved it in her hand.  She examined the photo with a raised eyebrow.

Victoria could have sworn she knew the other girl, but she just could not put a finger on it.

“What’s her name?”

“Sooyeon,” Yuri answered, avoiding having to speak of the girl’s stage name.

“It’s really adorable.  Why don’t you frame this?” Victoria suggested.

“That photo is too tiny to frame, don’t you think?” Yuri chuckled, stating a fact as she watched Victoria’s lips formed an ‘o.’  

“And besides, I like it better like this.”

In a small space so that no one else could see but her.  That’s what Yuri wanted.

“You look so happy,” Victoria remarked, handing back Yuri her prized possession.

“What?  I don’t look happy now?”

“No, I mean- It’s…It’s different.  Never mind,” Victoria waved off the explanation and glanced away.

                Yuri scrunched her eye brows then brought the photo in her hand back up to her view.  Victoria was right; Yuri was happy… much more than she was now.  But could she go back?  Back to that time when the smile on her face told nothing more than pure bliss?  As much as she was concerned about the future, Yuri was more for the ‘now’.  She tucked the picture back into her wallet and tossed the object back into her bag.

                She had to let go of Jessica and everything that had to do with her, even if it was something as simple as this.

                “Dinner’s ready, Victoria.”
 

★☆★

“I love you, too.”

That simple confession, even now, was enough to make Yoona’s head spin round and round.  She hadn’t expected the outcome to be exactly how she wanted it, how she always had dreamed it to be.

“I’m really glad you feel the same way, unnie.  I really am.”

She had not believed it at first, but the look in Seohyun’s eyes were not of sympathy, but was of love.  A warm, genuine love.

They did not kiss, nor did they hug afterwards.  The two girls merely held one another’s hands and smiled innocently, placing their foreheads against each other’s.  They had filled up the empty spot of each other’s life just through knowing their mutual feelings.  It was enough.

For now.

Yoona leaned against the wall of Seohyun’s classroom, waiting for the girl to be done with her rather long conversation with her professor.  She quietly observed her surroundings, glancing at all the couples that passed by her with their hands clasped tightly together.  They were so loving, so…showy.  She knew that couldn’t be the case between Seohyun and her, even if she wished so.

They could not be ‘showy’, nor could they ever be affectionate in front of this cruel, discriminating world.

Being a nation-wide known model didn’t actually help either.

“Yoona?”

The doe-eyed girl peered up at the deep voice calling out to her.  A tall, built figure stood at a short distance, waiting for her to notice him.

“Hi,” he said with a gentle smile when he realized she was finally looking at him.

“Oh, hi, Taecyeon-oppa,” Yoona greeted, “What are you doing here?”

“I’m running errands for the teachers here.  Waiting for someone?”

“Yeah.”

“Unnie!”

Yoona jumped and jolted from her spot when she felt her arm was suddenly interlaced with familiar hands.  The older girl glanced over and smiled brightly at her friend.

Or rather, her girlfriend.

“Did you wait long?” Seohyun clung on, seemingly not noticing another someone’s presence nearby.

“Not really,” Yoona shook her head, her free hand brushing away the stray strand of hair on Seohyun’s face.  She, too, seemed to have forgotten the third party.

“Hello there Seohyun-sshi,” Taecyeon spoke, making his existence known again.

Seohyun was surprised for a second but politely bowed to her upperclassman the next, “Hello, Taecyeon-sunbae.”

It would be the norm for Seohyun to walk away, but this time, she had refused to.  Instead, the younger girl only grabbed tighter onto Yoona’s arm, clutching it within her grasp as if her life depended on it.  Yoona only could hope that Taecyeon would not take notice of her blushed cheeks.

“Well I’ll be off now.  Take care, girls,” Taecyeon waved and walked off, smiling as he strutted away.

As soon as Taecyeon was far off from their sight, Seohyun let go of Yoona’s arm, much to the latter’s disappointment.

“It’s cold…” Yoona pouted, making up an excuse to be intimate with her girlfriend.

When she received no response from the younger girl, Yoona decided to latch herself on Seohyun, wrapping her arm around the girl’s shoulder as they walked together in rhythm.

“Where should we go now?”

“Shopping?”

“Sounds like a good plan.”
 

☆★☆

There was something wrong with Sooyoung, but Sunny did not know what.  Her usual grip on Sunny’s hand had been much loose than before.  There was less whining about food and more silence about nothing.  The shorter felt as though she was dragging along a balloon.  That was exactly what Sooyoung was to her right now, as light and as unresponsive.

“Are you alright?” Sunny asked in concern, worried that her friend might have gotten the winter flu.

“Yeah,” the taller one replied in short, kicking the pebble on the cemented floor.

Sooyoung’s eyes never left the ground for more than a minute ever since they started their walk.

Sunny had so many plans for today.  They were going to go to the amusement park, enjoy their time as a ‘couple’, then head to a nice restaurant, then act like a happy ‘couple.’  With this mood, even eating did not sound like a good deal sealer for them both.

                “Should I take you home?  You look tir-”

                “When are we going to be through with playing games, Sunny?”

That question and the serious look in Sooyoung’s eyes surprised her.  More than ever, it made her realize what she had done and what she had been doing to Sooyoung.  This was all just an act to her, but to the girl, surely it was not.  Nevertheless, Sunny could not let slip of what she knew to Sooyoung.  It would only hurt the latter more.

“W-We’ve gotten so far already.  Just bear with me some more, okay?” Sunny said insensitively, mounting her words with selfishness.  She knew that, but she couldn’t stop now.

“Why would you do this to her?  Wouldn’t knowing her girlfriend cheating on her would hurt her more?  Why?”

Sunny sighed.  She had never properly explained her reason to Sooyoung (although she found it odd that the latter had agreed regardless.)

“I want her to leave my side knowing I’m the bad guy.  She doesn’t love me.  She’s just obsessed with me.  Through this, I hope she understand her own feelings.”

“Did you ever take a moment to think about how insecure she would feel the next time she ‘falls in love with someone’?”

Sunny was shock at Sooyoung’s words.  The girl had never questioned her, although tonight was different.

“Why are you being like this today?”

Sooyoung scoffed, letting go of Sunny’s hand completely, almost throwing it off her own.

“No reason,” the bitter girl turned away and walked off, leaving her friend in puzzlement.

“Wait, Sooyoung!”

“Sunny?”

That familiar, haunting voice iced Sunny to her spot, her feet shaking with nervousness.

No, they’re not ready.  They’re not ready to deal with her, yet.

                “What are you doing here?  And who’s that?”

                She’s not ready, yet.

                “H-Hyomin…”

                “Who was that girl?”

                “I-” Sunny remained speechless, uttering neither explanation nor reason.  She had waited for this moment to confront Hyomin, but now, she just couldn’t do it.

                “I’m her girlfriend.”

                A firm grip grabbed on her shoulder and pulled her close.  Sunny looked up, bewildered at the giant that had come running back to save her out of the pit.  Sooyoung was just too nice, and all this time, Sunny was only hurting and using the girl.  Even now, she still was.

                “W-What?  What is this Sunny?  A-Are you cheating on me?  This is a joke right?”  Hyomin cried out, attracting attention from the gossiping bystanders.

                “She doesn’t love you,” Sooyoung stated, her hand traveling down to hold Sunny by the waist, portraying a more intimate look.  After all, she had been ‘trained’ all this time for this moment.

                “I’m sorry Hyominnie, but I can’t stay with you.  I just…I don’t feel the same way,” Sunny managed to confess, witnessing the thorns of her words piercing directly in Hyomin’s heart.  Nevertheless, this had to be done for them both.

                “Don’t call me that,” Hyomin scoffed, storming her way toward Sunny.  “You-”

Her hand swung swiftly in the air, aiming for her girlfriend’s face.  Sunny squinted her eyes closed, waiting for the harsh impact to meet with her flesh.  However, there was none.

                “Please don’t touch her.  She’s not yours anymore,” Sooyoung demanded, pushing Hyomin’s arm aside after having caught it in time.

                “Don’t interfere with us!  Who do you think you are!?” Hyomin screamed, tears already falling from her eyes.

                What being said shouldn’t have hurt Sooyoung if her relationship with Sunny was real, but it wasn’t.  She had no stand in this nor Sunny’s heart.

                “Hyomin!” Sunny hollered back, her voice screeching to end this once and for all.  After this, all would be fine, she assured herself.

                “Do you love her?  You said you don’t love me right?  Do you love this woman here?” Hyomin interrogated, desperate for an answer while wishing that this was all a joke.  A prank set up by Sunny to .  A nightmare that she would soon woke up from.  “Answer me!!”

                “I do.”

                Reality hit her hard.  A fake reality.

                “I don’t believe you.”

                “Let’s just go Sunny,” Sooyoung urged as the situation got out of hand the more they spent confronting each other on the crowded sidewalk.

                However, Sunny would not end it there.  If she was going to go through with this, it had been all the way.  She must carry this out completely.

                Tugging Sooyoung’s arms forcefully, Sunny pulled the taller girl closer to her as she wrapped her arms around the latter’s neck.  Instinctively, as they had done this once before, Sooyoung s her hand on Sunny’s back affectionately, drawing the shorter girl nearer to herself.  Breathing heavily, Sunny leaned forward as Sooyoung stood still, uncertain and in question of what to do next.  But she did not need to do anything; Sunny had it all under control.

                Although this, they had not practiced.

                The moment Sooyoung felt her lips against Sunny’s for more than just a light touch, she knew they were going too far.  But for those fifteen seconds, she did not mind it.  Even if it was faked and even if it was just for show, Sooyoung wanted this.  She might have been hallucinating it, but the kiss seemed so…’meant to be’, like it was something that should have already happened.

                Even so, when Sunny pulled away, Sooyoung understood that this, ‘their play’, had already come to an end.  The curtains were going to close soon.

                Sunny watched as Hyomin ran off, crying speechlessly.  She was certain that image would come back to haunt her for a while, but she, too, would have to let go.

                “I’m sorry,” Sunny apologized to her friend, who had muttered not a single word after what she had done.  “About the kis-”

                “Don’t worry about it.  It was just an act anyway,” Sooyoung coldly brushed it off, trampling over her own heart like the pebble she had kicked to the curb.

                “I’ll take you home.  You need some rest.”

                “Was it wrong for me to do that?” Sunny’s tears were also threatening to fall, sympathy overwhelming her emotions.

                Sooyoung glanced up at the now dark sky.  The clouds had stopped their chatter to listen to the earthlings’ stories, deciding not to share their own sorrow as tonight already had enough.  The curious onlookers had already dispersed, moving back to dealing with their lives.  Nevertheless, Sooyoung’s heart remained in the same state, weary and heavy.

                “It’s better than pretending to hide what you really feel.”
 

★☆★

                “We’re done!!”

                Yuri allowed her body to fall back into the ground as she punched her fists in the air celebrating the successful teamwork.

                “Thanks Victoria.  I’m sorry you had to do most of the work.  I’ll ask my dad to pay you extra for this week’s salary,” Yuri giggled, patting Victoria’s back to comment the girl for her part in their accomplishment.

                “No need to.  I’m just glad I could help,” Victoria humbly refused.

                Yuri pondered for a few minutes.  ‘There had to be some way I could repay Victoria,’ Yuri thought.

                “I’ll head home no-”

                “I got it!”

                A loud snap of the fingers and an erupted sound from Yuri stunned Victoria, who, without warning, was suddenly pulled out the door along with the excited black pearl.

                “Follow me!”
 

---

                “Like it?”

                “Hmm, it’s really good!” Victoria savored the spicy taste traveling in and down .

She hadn’t been able to eat ddukbokki ever since arriving in Korea a couple of weeks ago.  Coincidentally, Yuri had decided this would be her mini present to the older girl, which turned out to be perfectly just what she needed.

“Thank you.  It’s really delicious,” Victoria expressed her gratitude, finishing what was her third serving cup from the streets’ food stall.

“You’re welcome,” Yuri beamed, satisfied that Victoria was content with what she received.

They walked in silence, observing the early Christmas lights shining from shop after shop.  Soon, they ended up at the deserted garden that Yuri had once taken Victoria to upon request.  It was still peaceful as ever, just like the first time she remember it.

But when was the first time?

“You don’t remember me, do you, Yuri?”

Yuri gazed over at Victoria, confused at the girl’s question.

“What do you mean by that?”

Victoria giggled, hopping around the grass field.

“We met before when we were kids.”

The bewildered reaction on Yuri’s face told Victoria that the memory still hadn’t come back to the girl.

“You saved me from a few boys who bullied me right here nine years ago.”

Yuri tried to recall, going back to what happened seasons before.  Then a special occasion reminded her unlocked part of the unforgotten parts of her memories.

“Nine years ago… that was the time that I ran away from home because my dad wanted to introduce me to the daughter of ‘boring’ people, as I always had called them.”

“That was also the day where I waited for the ‘arrogant’ princess to come and meet me but she never came.”

Yuri waited for both sides of the story to interconnect and immediately reacted upon it once she realized that meeting Victoria at the party was not ‘a new encounter’ but was a ‘faithful reunion.’

“The world is so small…”

“Don’t you think it just meant to be?”

Victoria stepped closer, taking Yuri’s hands into hers.  Yuri didn’t retreat or budge and only stared at their intertwined fingers.

“It may be hard to believe but I always liked you then.  You’re always so playful, laughing things off with a smile and infecting others with your joy.  I really love that about you.”

Victoria tip-toed on her feet and landed a second kiss on Yuri’s cheek — soft, quick, and gentle.

  This time, Yuri was neither shock or responsive; she only gazed into Victoria’s eyes and tried to find truth in them.

“Will you give me a chance?  Go out with me?”

Yuri had to let everything go.  Even to the most difficult things.

“We can work things out together.”
 

☆★☆

                “What did you say?”

                Despite waiting in the cold, excitement from meeting up with her loved one consumed her heart and lit a smile to her face.  She knew it was going to be something special.  She knew something was up.

                But what had actually happened and the hurtful words that were being said were not what Tiffany had hoped.  Not what she had expected.

                “We can’t see each other anymore.”

                They were doing fine.  They were going smoothly.  They were heading toward the right direction.

                “Why?”

                Why now?  Why all of the sudden would Taeyeon say something like this to her?  It was worse than a nightmare, because right now, she was not waking despite how much it was hurting and how pain was being inflicted.

                “I- We can’t see each other anymore.”

                “Give me a reason, Taeyeon.”

                She didn’t think it would happen.  Definitely, she could see that Taeyeon was insecure, but as obvious as looking through glass could ever be, Taeyeon’s feelings for her was stronger than her insecurities.  So was Tiffany’s.  She had already made her first move and she was ready.  Now, she was only pushed further away by the person who she thought loved her just as she did.

“Because the world is not perfect.  Not everything we want will go the way we wanted.”

“I don’t get what you mean.”

                “You don’t have to.”

                “Taey-…”

                Tiffany wanted to let Taeyeon know that they would be fine, pulling through together.  Although it did not look like anything she say could reach to Taeyeon at the moment.  The girl was bewitched by the dark side of reality.

                “…I’ll give you time.  Maybe you’re just… I’ll leave you alone.”

                Tiffany turned to leave, but was caught back by the tone of Taeyeon’s voice.

                “I’m serious, Tiffany.”
                
“No, you’re not.”

                “I want it this way.”

                “You don’t.  Stop lying to yourself.”

                It was all a lie, Tiffany told herself.  All was a lie.

“Tiffany, how do you feel about me?”

It was the first time Taeyeon had asked her straightforwardly, but of course, they both already understood each other enough to see how the other felt.

But neither side could see clearly enough to fully comprehend.

                “I thought you would already know.”

                “Then tell me what is it that you think I know.”

                “Feelings are not as easily spoken into words as you think, Taeyeon.”

                “You can’t say it, can you?”

                “Neither can you.”

                The first knot had already been tied.
 

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