Chapter 14
Only Look at Me



“How is she?”

Sooyoung placed her plate of spaghetti back down on the counter table and paid all her attention to Yuri, who had just walked out of her room with a rather gloomy expression on her face.

“She’s sleeping. Her condition is getting better but she won’t be able to walk around as much today,” Yuri replied in concern for her cousin, considering how the girl was down with a fever from soaking in the rain.

“So, what really happened last night?” Sooyoung asked, tapping her fork lightly against her half empty dish. Picking up the plate again, Sooyoung helped herself with a couple of mouthfuls as she listened attentively to what she hoped would be an explanation from her roommate.

“A lot of not-so-good stuff. I’ll tell you later tonight. Right now I’m running late and I got to go the company to arrange some appointments for next week,” Yuri replied simply, wrapping her business coat over her shoulders while strapping on her heels at the front door in a rush. “Since it’s your day off today, take care of Yoona.”

“W-Waitmf, Yuri!” Shouting out in gibberish, she quickly swallowed her food and ran to the closed door. Sooyoung quickly opened it in panic and looked swiftly down the hallway of both sides. Yuri was already gone like the wind.

Sighing, Sooyoung stumbled back inside the house and picked up her phone. Just then, Sooyoung sensed a bit of hesitation seeping in and was reluctant to press on with the call to her friend.

‘That idiot is going to worry if I call her… Maybe I’ll stay hom-’

A message alert from her phone abruptly interrupted Sooyoung’s contemplation. She glanced at the screen then opened the message blindly with a click of a finger. 

“Yah! Sooyoungie! You better not forget our ‘appointment’! I’ll be waiting for you with those delicious meal tickets in hand.”

The second she realized who it was from, Sooyoung’s eyes widened as her memory was kicked back into her brain.

Today was the day of her first supposedly first ‘practice’ date with Sunny, whom she promised that she would help out. In other words, Sooyoung would not be able to be home to take care of Yuri’s cousin like she was supposed to.

Sooyoung paced around the living room, drawing squares and circles with her steps as she was in frantic on what to do. She did not want to leave Yoona unattended with such a high fever nor did she want to break her promise with Sunny and ended up losing that tempting free dinner.

Glancing around the room, she searched for anything that would help her think. Just then, at the right moment when help was called for, a certain someone’s brown book bag lying on the sofa caught her sight as an imaginary light bulb flashed above her head.

Invading one’s belongings was like invading one’s personal space, but in case of emergency, Sooyoung could care less. She pulled out Yoona’s pink phone from the girl’s handbag and searched through the contact list for a specific name.

‘It got to be in here somewhe- Oh! Wait, this is a nickname right…? This should be it. Doesn’t hurt giving it a try.’

Sooyoung placed her finger over the call button and without a second thought, pressed the dial symbol.

To her surprise, the other line picked up the second the signal was retrieved.

“You’re Yoona’s friend right? This is Yuri’s roommate, Sooyoung. Can I ask you for a favor?”

★☆★

“I like to dominate at times, too, you know?”

“What did she mean by that…?”

Tiffany’s whisper had been repeated in Taeyeon’s head over and over like a playing record. It tended to mess with her mind every time she was reminded of the night before. She never expected the date. She never expected Tiffany’s words. And most of all, being pushed to the wall and almost being kissed by the person she have a major crush on were definitely something far off the limits of her expectations.

However, just like the movie, nothing further than a tease happened. Tiffany had withdrawn herself away from Taeyeon before the girl could reciprocate in any way with the courage she had just managed to build up. Just one more second then Taeyeon would have pulled Tiffany closer to her and whisper to the girl she loves with the utmost truth that she had been restraining herself not to let her friend know. It had always been like this since the moment they met; all it took was just one more movement of the second hand for everything to be different. Only then would there be no regrets and no mistakes to worry over.

Everything that Tiffany had done to Taeyeon up until now had always got the older girl to over think inquisitively. Why did Tiffany even called her out so late at night for a date? Why did Tiffany make up excuses just to hold her hand? And why did Tiffany almost kissed her but pulled away just as soon as she pushed her against the wall? She questioned why did one thing after another even happened the way it did but never did she received an answer for any of her doubts and wonders. The reason was simple: she never dared to ask. 

Taeyeon desperately wanted to confront the girl in question and asked for the truth behind all of Tiffany’s actions, but she was too afraid. She was too scared to know that answer might not have been what she wanted to hear. She was too frightened to know of the truth and how Tiffany might not even love her the way she does to Tiffany… and how maybe she was just playing around.

And because of all these fears in her heart, Taeyeon continued to suffer from oblivion of doubts and stress. 

‘Maybe this is for the best,’ Taeyeon thought while playing with the headphones on the table mindlessly.

She fidgeted in her chair, spinning round and round until dizziness hit her. She slouched down on her comfortable chair and looked up at the blinding lights. After a few seconds of retrieving a headache from her thoughtless actions, Taeyeon crossed her arms together and closed her eyes. 

‘If only the thoughts of her would go away…’

Taeyeon knew she was asking the possible that had been made impossible by her love for Tiffany. Right now, all she could do was let her thinking flow naturally.

Taeyeon was never the type to steal someone’s girlfriend away. She would rather let herself be in pain time and time again then choosing to break in between a peaceful relationship of the one she loves so dearly. She never wished to see Tiffany cry because of anything she would do, but the feeling was just as much as she wanted Tiffany to be hers.

She craved for Tiffany in so many ways of every minute that she was awake. However, Taeyeon would rather choose to not think of it…if she had a choice. She did not want to turn her love into something similar to what others would call ‘lust’.

Taeyeon never hated Jaejoong either. She just despise the fact how he had met Tiffany much earlier than she did. Taeyeon had a belief that her one-week love with Tiffany could never compete with what the two years of dating that Jaejoong and the girl she loves had built up. Not that she was confident that she had enough charisma to win over such a beautiful angel if the gap was not so great, but Taeyeon was pretty certain she would have some sort of chance in having Tiffany know how she really feels about the girl. 

Now, she couldn’t even speak of it.

“Taeyeon? Are you here?”

Taeyeon jumped off from her chair and hastily approached the studio door, which had been impatiently knocked by the person behind it. She was a bit surprised to see who it was that had stumbled by.

“Oh, hi, Jessica. Did you need something?” Taeyeon asked, opening the door wider as she welcomed her dongsaeng inside.

“Are you ready for tonight?” 

Taeyeon took in a deep breather before answering, “Yeah. You?”

“Feels quite about right but not so much at the same time. Want to do one more run through?”

“Sure. Let me set up the music.”

With a few clicks on the computer, the studio room was soon surrounded with a soft and gentle beat of the piano through the high definition audio players across the walls. On TaeYeon’s cue, two angelic voices soon joined in, remedying the atmosphere. 
However, half way through the song, Taeyeon halted the music and turned to Jessica with a worried expression on her face.

“You’re a bit off key. Is there something wrong?”

Jessica slumped down on a nearby chair, her sullen expression obvious to the eye. 

“I’m nervous, Taeyeon. She’s going to come to see me tonight,” Jessica explained, bringing up her palms, cuffing her face, as her heart tensed up at the thought.

“She?” 

“Yuri.”

Jessica replied without much thought, having forgotten that she had not yet Taeyeon the whole story of her love life and who the person in question was. The moment she had remember it, though, it was a tad too late as the name had already slipped out of her tongue.

“So the charming idiot is Yuri? You…like her…?”

Taeyeon stared at Jessica with her eyebrow slightly raised and Jessica returned the look with wide opened. Even though she was about to knock it off as a joke, the blonde girl placed her lips together and merely smiled… eventually admitting to the truth shamelessly.

“I’m in love with her.”

Jessica never had the intention to hide it from Taeyeon and there was also no reason to. It was rather fair for her sunbae if she let the girl know since Jessica already knew of the latter’s love interest quite well like the back of her hand. In addition, she understood clearly of the way Taeyeon worked. The girl would never unnecessarily spoil any secrets to anyone if the other party wished it not.

“I got to say I’m a bit shock. No wonder you kept asking me how she was doing,” Taeyeon stated, followed by a soft laugh. “How long has it been?”

“More than a year, but I think it actually started around high school days.”

“So I’m guessing Yuri’s high school crush is…you…?”

Jessica nodded in reply as a pensive smile spread across her lips. She had never regret anything more than the fact that she had not told the one she loved how she felt the moment the same feeling had hit her.

“You knew?”

“Yeah...”

“I think you still have a chance,” Taeyeon encouraged Jessica, smiling with a hopefully assurance, “I might not know much since Yuri and I haven’t really had any deep conversations for so long, but, as far as I know, she is not dating anyone at the moment. You told me before, there are things that are best left unsaid but there also confessions that one must made in order not to lose the person they love, right? I think this is one of those occasions where you need to step up and say what you need to.”

“Thanks, Taeyeon. I feel much better now,” Jessica gave the older girl a heartwarming smile, one which she would not be able to form if it was not for her friend’s comforting words.

“Talking to you somehow help me gain myself some confidence as well. Let’s go through one more practice, then, shall we?”

“Hey, Taeyeon?”

“Yeah?”

“About Tiffany…”

Taeyeon’s smile dropped slightly as she eyed the floor. She inwardly sighed and lifted her head up to face Jessica again. “I’ll tell her sooner or later. Just not now. It’s not the right time, yet.”

‘She knows already, Taeyeon. Just tell her that you’re feeling for her is not just ‘like’ or mere admiration. These two frustrate me, but I promise myself I cannot interfere with their business or anyone for that matter. I have my own to deal with anyways…fighting, Kim Taeyeon!’

Jessica made a mental note to herself as she rid of the temptation of spoiling anything she knew about the whole situation to Taeyeon. Pumping her fist into the air, she exclaimed loudly with determined eyes, “Alright then. Let’s just concentrate on the show and give it our all tonight!”

Taeyeon nodded in agreement and reset the music as the track began to replay once again.

Even if they had smiled, even if they had said everything was okay, and even if they really were for that one moment, both Jessica and Taeyeon could not deny the fact that their troubling hearts had not stopped trembling. 

☆★☆

One assignment done after another…it was as if this had been prolonged to what had been hours. A decent mountain-full of paperwork stacked neatly on the right side of Victoria’s small desk was challenged by twice the size of another on her left side. That was the unfinished bunch.

She could have easily rejected the task and threw a tantrum at those whom she called ‘co-workers’ when they had, in their form of bullying the newbie, pushed aside all their own work to her. She was naïve to think that even one among the group would be merciful enough to understand the limits of harshness that she was receiving, but that was nowhere near the case. However, none of them had directly laid a finger on her or injured her in any way…except maybe a couple of those ‘accidental’ coffee spills on her uniform or, worse, on completed reports, or even the ‘coincidental’ rolled-out-of-stock tissue paper across the all the stalls. (Now, truthfully speaking, she was kind of forming a trauma against going to the restrooms at her company.) 

Have she told this to the higher-ups? No, and that was not because of her softness. She had the will and the potential to throw back everything at the ones who had ‘purposely’ hurt her, but that would only lead to the worst and cause too much of a scene. She also had the power to file a law suit against each and every single person who had bothered her, but that was far from necessary. Everything could have stopped and she would be at peace again if she had sent in a report regarding this issue to her boss, who was, as the matter of fact, her friend, Kwon Yuri. 

She could have, but she didn’t. 

Victoria did not want to worry Yuri in any way and stress the girl out even more than she already was. She understood that Yuri was on the steps of becoming a CEO in just a few of years and any tiny, little issue could affect her boss greatly. Rumors about them lurking around together after company hours had been recently added onto the list of worries. If it was as ‘friends’ then Victoria wouldn’t have to really bother much on the problem, but others had been going around spouting a little spice into the extras and added unnecessary details that was far from the truth. In any case, if Yuri was to defend her now, it might lead to a chance of ruining the girl’s reputation of ‘taking-sides’. And once again, Victoria did not want that to happen.

Shuffling through papers, Victoria was relieved to have finally accomplished with checking and reviewing the second set of reports, although, unfortunately, there were still three left to go. All of the work she had done for the past week exceeded the requirements by far of which she was asked to handle. Her salary could and should have been higher than what it was now, but there was no point in that. Despite wishing to live independently without her father’s support, there was always some sort of backup she would magically find in her bank account. Even if Victoria knew the source of it all, she also comprehended the fact that there was no way to stop her father’s stubbornness. 

One would ask why she would choose to continue to work here at the Kwon Enterprise when she had other choices for the future ahead of her. Her reasons were simple. Firstly, she wanted to live life like a normal citizen, experiencing a daily routine of an average adult you would find around Seoul, and that would include working for half of the time. Secondly, Victoria did mention that she would wish for a chance when she could be completely independent of her family’s wealth and carried out things on her own while actually earning what would fill her wallet, and this was just that. Thirdly? As much as she wished this was not one of her reasons, it was practically impossible to lie to herself that it was, in fact, part of why she had stayed ‘till now.

“Why are you still here, Victoria?”

She glanced up at the husky voice of the person who had specifically addressed her name and realized the rather short distance between her and that individual. Dark brown eyes, chocolate colored hair, evenly tan skin…and of course a charming smile. The person was none other than Victoria’s boss, friend and…

…her third reason, Kwon Yuri.

“Oh, hello there, Yuri-sshi,” Victoria bowed her head respectfully, having the true purpose of hiding her flustered face.

Yuri smiled softly with a raised eyebrow and pointed to the time on the computer screen as she said, “It’s already 5:00PM, and so work time is over. That means no honorific is needed, and plus, we’re technically alone.”

Victoria scanned around her surroundings and not a single soul was in the office except for Yuri and her.

‘They really left me here… That means we’re…we’re alone…’

The older girl’s heart was abruptly tightened as butterflies invaded her vulnerable self. She didn’t know when it started but now, every time Yuri was close to her, Victoria could sensed something tugging at the edge of her heart.

Even the thought of the younger girl could have such effects.

“Let me help you.” 

Yuri began picking up several pieces of paper and flipping through a couple of packets, examining them carefully. Her eyes twitched slightly as her head tilted to one side in puzzlement. She grabbed up another packet, and another. Something wasn’t right.

“N-No, it’s okay.” 

“No, seriously, let me help you. These are not even your work load. This one was assigned to Park-sshi…and this to Jong-sshi…and this one as well …Why do you have these?”

Victoria remained silent, going through a process of speed thinking so that she could avoid answering the question.

Truthfully, Yuri was frustrated at the sight of Victoria overworking herself. She knew of bits and pieces (but not all) of the nonsense bullying that was occurring recently ever since Victoria was hired. And part of it, she knew it was partially her fault as well. If there was to be any evidence that she could used to backfire against all of pathetic acts then she would have done so already. Unfortunately, there was none as of yet.

“It’s okay. Don’t you have business to attend to later? I heard you’re going to your…your…”

“My what?” 

Yuri stared at Victoria strangely as they girl was unable to get her words together.

“Your wife’s performance.”

It was silent for a moment, but that quietness did not maintain for long as Yuri ended up bursting in her own spree of giggles because of shock and just mere disbelief.

“W-Who told you that?”

“Sooyoung-sshi,” Victoria answered, giving Yuri a bewildered look.

‘That idiot shikshin…’ 

Yuri shook her head at what her close friend pulled behind her back.

“Don’t take Sooyoung too seriously. It’s clearly a joke, although I seriously thought you would supposedly already know that. Yes, I’m going to a music show later, but she’s just a friend of mine,” Yuri clarified, partially wishing that part of it was not the truth.

“A girlfriend?”

“A friend. Are you trying to tease me now, Victoria?”

Victoria chuckled under her breath at the sight of Yuri’s child-like pout in the girl’s reaction to Victoria’s simple curiosity.

“A friend of mine invited me to go as well but I feel like finishing this up. They are all important paperwork needed to be handed your father tomorrow anyway.” 

“Are you sure you’re going to be fine?” Yuri asked again, concern with Victoria’s condition.

Victoria nodded in assurance, even though the look in Yuri’s eyes still held doubts.

“Well, the building doesn’t close up until late at night so the custodian won’t be going around any time soon. Just don’t stress yourself out okay?” The younger girl reminded her fellow employee and friend. Yuri then strapped on her bag and picked up any of her other belongings as she was ready to go. She turned to Victoria one last time before leaving for the door, “Take care.”

“You, too. Have fun,” Victoria waved her hand while smiling cheerfully to Yuri, who soon disappeared behind the walls.

Victoria’s smiled started to fade as she slumped down onto her chair and soon cuffed her face in her own embarrassment. She could feel a sense of security around Yuri and it was almost as if there was no barrier between them. Yuri’s words were gentle and they made her comfortable despite the troubles she had received upon entering the company. She had hid from Yuri that countless of accidents had happened to her because she didn’t want to worry the girl. Victoria wanted to do the best, even if it meant that she was only doing it to satisfy Yuri.

The older girl let out a sigh as she glared at the discouraging pile of whiteness and blank ink on her desk. She swung her head side to side and made a mental note to herself not to be pressure by the load.

There was one other thing she hid from Kwon Yuri, and Victoria still had no courage or maybe even the intention of letting the girl know. 

But maybe she would really tell her when the time is right.

★☆★

Throwing her blanket aside, Yoona abruptly shot up from her bed, breathing heavily. 

‘That nightmare…’

Yoona sighed hopelessly. It wasn’t just any horrible dream…it was a flashback. Something that had already happened.

Glancing around her surroundings, she noticed that it was not her room. However, Yoona did recognize the familiar set structure of the furniture ware as something she had seen before.

“I’m in Yuri-unnie’s room…”

Bringing her palm to her forehead, she realized that there was a cold therapy pack strapped around her head. Pulling it off its Velcro, Yoona tossed the belt aside and kicked back anything that was firing more heat to her body’s temperature. She swiped through the surface of her neck and knew that she had been sweating excessively from head to toe. Breathing unevenly, Yoona sat against the bed frame and winced at the pain that she was suddenly feeling. A headache was disturbing her mind, a high fever was weakening her body, and numbed muscles were limiting her movements. 

But the nightmare had done much worse.

She huffed out a sarcastic laugh in her own sympathy at the pathetic fool that she had caused herself to become.

‘That’s what you get, procrastinator Im Yoona.’

Yoona thought, partially cursing herself at how everything had ended up the way it did.

The images of last night were still fresh in her memory, and part of Yoona hoped that the rain had caused some miraculous amnesia that could help her forget. Apparently it did not, and now Yoona was struck with regret deeper than anything she had felt. 

She was only a few minutes late.

Being a coward that she was, Yoona could not even approach Seohyun, take her hands and run away like the main character in some heroic movie. All she did that night was watch from afar, soaked herself in the rain, and clenched her fists while hiding the tears that were camouflaged by the dripping droplets falling on her face.

‘Pathetic.’

She felt as if her role as the main character had been cast aside. Maybe she never was one to begin with. Maybe Yoona was just an outcast. Maybe she was just the ‘best friend’ in the movies, destined to never get, in this case, the girl. Her faith would have been better if she had never fallen for someone of the same . She would have been much better off just being nothing more than friends with Seohyun.

That was what Yoona had persuaded herself.

Yoona crawled back under the blanket, blocking out all of the negative thinking, while attempting to bring in some of those optimistic thought that would somehow help liven her up.

‘When I wake up from this nap, I’ll be a new Im Yoona. A Yoona where I would be happy again. A smiling Yoona who would be there to support Hyunnie. A Yoona who will have given up on all her feelings. A Yoona before she met Seo Joo Hyun.’

She was through hurt. She was through with longing. She was through with watching.

Yoona closed her eyes and let everything just slip away.

However, what had prevented her from doing so were the disturbing doorbell chimes following her attempt of retrieving back to the more peaceful side of her dreamland.

Throwing the blanket over her head, Yoona cuffed her ears with her hand, but the ringing continued. Tossing the comforter forward, Yoona glanced at the digits on the digital clock placed on the night table next to the bed. 9:30AM, it read.

‘Yuri-unnie should have left for work already. Is Sooyoung-unnie not home…?’

The door bell noise soon turned into loud banging against the wooden door. With no one in the house but her there left to answer, Yoona tiredly got up from the bed and sloppily nudge her feet toward the apartment’s entrance. Twisting the golden knob, she opened the door.

“Did you forget somethi-…”

A momentary silence intruded the room as the resident and her visitor exchanged undecipherable stares. 

The hurt was back. 

The pain was back. 

The reality was back.

“Joo Hyun…”

Yoona wished she hadn’t waked up, because even now, her nightmare had continued. Only just worse.

☆★☆

“Stop treating me like some sort of disease and just relax yourself. It’s not like it’s the first time you let a girl hold your hand now is it?” The shorter of the two girls began to playfully banter the other.

“Look, I’ve dated a couple of people but none of them were girls so how do you expect me to relax when I’m not even used to it!?” She exclaimed, drawing a bit of attention from walking bystanders gazing over the pair.

“Then get used to it! Just be normal. Nothing is going to be different from a date between girls and a date between a guy and a girl. Besides, I’m going to be the guy in the relationship, so chill out,” The older, but shorter, girl bellowed back, ignoring the unwanted stares aiming their way.

“Yeah I can get used to that…if only you were the taller one, dwarf.”

“Yah! Can you knock that word off your vocabulary!?” 

Sunny swung off Sooyoung’s hand from her grasp and slapped the girl’s back roughly. They might not be real lovers, but both Sooyoung and Sunny’s actions were similar to a pair of newlyweds. 

The tall girl flinched in pain and rubbed her soon-to-be-bruised back at the harshness of the contact.

“Dwarf,” Sooyoung scoffed, hiding a smile behind her tease as she watched her little friend stomping ahead of her in a frustrated manner.

“You’re such a child. No wonder why you still don’t have a boyfriend,” Sunny belittled, sticking her tongue to her side while poking the edge of out of habit from built anger.

“Yah! I’m not a child! Just letting you know but I can be a better girlfriend than you can! One who doesn’t lie and cheat!” Sooyoung pouted with her eyebrows crunches together. She was starting to wonder how she even dragged herself into this worthless and pointless competition of nothing. 

“Oh, really now?”

Sunny halted from her steps and turned herself to face Sooyoung, questioning in sarcastically mocking tone. An impish smile lurked onto the girl’s face as she approached her friend in slightly heavy steps. Sooyoung felt the urge to take a few steps backward, gulping the lump in when she sensed an almost intense aura coming her way.

“Why don’t you show me then?”

What Sooyoung had expected of what Sunny would do next to her was far from what she had been actually pulled into.

Sunny had taken her by the collar and forcefully tugged Sooyoung closer while possessively wrapping her arms around the girl’s neck. The irregularity of Sooyoung’s heartbeat, once again, had started beating its way out of control. 

Sooyoung was close enough to be able to get a whiff of the strawberry fragrance of Sunny’s scented lip gloss and it was making her thoughts unbalanced. She had never been this near in proximity to a girl before, and Sooyoung hated even more that she had eventually fallen into admittance that Sunny was really an attractive girl.

Not knowing where to place her eyes at, Sooyoung averted her sight, glancing side by side at anything but straight at Sunny. Rather than being worried about the spectators they had gained themselves, Sooyoung was more bothered on how she speechless on what to even say.

‘How should I respond to this…? Ask her to back away? But I…’

More than anything she had hated up until now, Sooyoung despised it most when she couldn’t deny how much she did not want Sunny to let go.

“The look in your eyes…” Sunny started, her breathing brushed by Sooyoung’s skin.

“W-What?” Sooyoung asked, directing her eyes slightly to the side.

“It’s almost as if you actually like me.”

With that being said, Sooyoung quickly pushed Sunny off, making the shorter girl stumbled a bit before she managed to balance herself on her heels. The blush lines on Sooyoung’s face had already been leveled to its maximum and they couldn’t get any redder than it already was for a normal human being.

“This is perfect! I’m sure Hyomin would be convinced!” Sunny clasped her hands together in excitement and hopped around the tall girl.

“What’s next after hand-holding?” Sooyoung cleared , quickly changing the topic while maintaining her composure in the meantime. Sooyoung was being more cautious about everything she did, including her choice of words and the way she acted, and it was starting to bother her. She disliked it…just like all of the emerging feelings that she currently had for the girl in front of her.

“Speaking. We need to change our ways of talking to each other. It’s not loving at all,” Sunny replied, reading off her notes in her little notepad that she had pulled out from her back pocket.

“Aren’t we doing things a bit out of order, then?” Sooyoung questioned, peeking at the scribbles on the line notepad, but had failed to read any details for Sunny had quickly closed the item and tugged it back into her jeans pocket.

“Either way we have to get you prepared,” her shorter friend mumbled, inwardly sighing. Just thinking about dealing with a grumbling shikshin in the future had already afflicted a headache to the small girl’s brain.

“Why only me? Prepare for what? What about you?” 

“I’m pretty sure you’ll have difficulties when we get to the last thing that we need to do. Now let’s get to practice!” 

Sunny took the tall girl’s hand and squeezed it in hers while starting to speed off into their planned destination behind the metal gates. It was a place of bustling noises, kids crying and laughing in practically every corner, pretty lights dangling across the fields, couples hooking arms and expressing their love, and last but not least, delicious food stations…a lot of it.

Whatever the ‘last thing’ was, Sooyoung was convinced that it would not go smoothly or that she would have any easy time dealing with such. However, those concerns, as of now, were in the back of her mind as watered with the sight of the lovers of her life.

Maybe she wasn’t pay attention…maybe it was too much of a shock…but Sooyoung did not even try to deny what her friend had told her. However, realization of suspicion had chosen to hit Sunny’s mind instead.

‘Choi Sooyoung…you don’t actually like me…do you?’

“Yah! Sunny Bunny! Let’s eat!”

“I’m coming!”

‘Maybe I’m just imagining things.’

☆☆☆

“Hey, are you going to come and hear me sing?”

Jessica languidly rolled herself up in her friend’s comforter, wrapping herself away from the cold as she poked her head out, playing a turtle impersonation game. It was a Saturday afternoon and Jessica was bored of her mind. With nothing to do, she had insisted that she wanted to drop by Yuri’s house because her sister was out of the town with her parents to some place she did not wish to go to and her cousin was on a family trip. Her childhood friend, Tiffany, had also left Jessica for the girl’s boyfriend on one of those rare dates that Tiffany highly anticipated since forever. She had no one else left to entertain her other than her best friend, Kwon Yuri. However, due to the lack of expectance of her friend’s visit, Yuri had been spending her time finishing up a novel for the past twenty-two minutes Jessica was in her room. Yuri had no intention of laying the book down since it was what she had planned on her schedule, being the punctual person that she was.

Secretly, though, the book itself was just a help of distraction.

“You asked me this the third time already. Yes I will. Of course, I will,” Yuri answered, for the third time, flattening Jessica’s cheeks with her hands while puffing out the engulfed air when the girl pouted at her. She turned back around and resumed to her reading, flipping through the pages without paying much attention.

It was a few days until Jessica’s performance at a small concert her choir school officials had held. Jessica was chosen to sing a solo and it was her first time ever standing on stage in front of a large crowd of family, friends, and strangers. She was nervous, but it was not something she couldn’t do. 

“Will you be able to find me among the crowd?” Yuri asked, a smile curving on her lips playfully.

Jessica wrapped her arms around Yuri’s neck loosely and peeked upon what the girl was concentrating on. Yuri swallowed thin air as she gripped on the edge of her shirt when Jessica thoughtlessly breathed warmly into her neck. She maintained her posture and stayed still as possible to not make the slightest movement. It was only until boredom soon hit Jessica as the girl laid her back on the cushion again and decided that she would just stare blankly at the white ceiling. Yuri quietly let out a sigh of relief as she tried to rid her mind of everything else, going back to reading at what were just now a messed of symbols to her.

“I promise you that I will absolutely not date anyone until I tell you how I feel!”

“It’s a promise, right? I’ll wait for your response.”

“It’s a promise.”

It had been a month since Yuri had last told her best friend, or at least managed to slip a big a hint enough for the girl to understand, that she was in love with her. It had been a month of no reply, no progress, and no answer. It had been a month of ‘everything-back-to-normal’, and Yuri hated it, but even so, she had to respect their promise.

“No matter where you are, I’ll find you. And don’t you dare hide from me because I can magically tell if I can’t sense your presence around,” Jessica replied to Yuri’s question, playing with Yuri’s hair while she was at it.

Yuri ignored any physical contact she was feeling from Jessica and acted normal as if nothing was happening. It was already hard enough to restrain any of her occurring temptation.

“‘Magically’, or so you said. Are we talking fantasy now, princess?”

“My world is a fantasy when you are around, Prince Kwon,” Jessica whispered with a wide grin on her face, one which Yuri could not see.

“The ones with good endings right?”

“The one with the happy-ever-after ending.”

Yuri closed her book and set it aside once she was ‘finished’ (or pretending to, at least) with the novel. Staring at the cover of the fiction on the ground, she murmured under her breath words of truth, “But that’s a fantasy. It forever will be.”

“I wish it was our reality.”

“Did you say something?”

“I said I’ll be able to spot you no matter what. But I want your eyes be on me and focus on me only. You got that?” Jessica uttered, quickly reverting back to their original topic.

“Are you hitting on me? That’s something you’d only say to your boyfriend or husband.”

“You’re my Kwon-seobang, so be quiet and deal with it.”

Yuri leaned her head back on the bed and relaxed her mind as she gazed thoughtfully at the blank whiteness of her ceiling even if it bore her no interest. 

“C-Can you give me some time Yuri? I’m not prepared to hear you say t-those words, yet. I… I promise you I’ll tell you my feelings when I’m ready. I’m not really sure right now, and I don’t want to hurt you.”

Jessica’s words reran in her head, causing her to become even more impatient than she already was. What was even more frustrating that Jessica could touch and hug her like nothing was ever said that day while Yuri was put under a restraint of unable to do anything to the girl in return. And it hurt her even more to see the unchanged interactions between Jessica and Donghae…like nothing she had said to girl really mattered in any way.

“Sooyeon…what am I really to you?”

Silence.

Yuri glanced back to witness her icy sleeping beauty drifting off to wonderland. Smiling, Yuri played around jokingly as she poked Jessica’s cheeks with a touch of her finger. She watched as the older girl slightly twitched and shuffled around in the comforter but yet, her eyes were unmoving.

Yuri brought up her hands and lightly the strands of Jessica’s ruffled hair. It was the only time she could touch her princess.

“I love you, Sooyeon.”

Despite what Jessica had told her, she could not hold it in much longer. Her feelings were needed to be express before they explode in her mind. After saying the words she so badly wanted to speak, Yuri let her head rest and soon fell into her own world of the rabbit’s hole.

Being oblivious that Yuri was, she did not know that Jessica had felt every slightest physical contact that the girl had made and heard every word that was being spoken.
Jessica, without making a single sound in fear of waking her prince up, watched silently and admired the girl’s beauty without being able to touch her. This was the time where Jessica could not lay a finger on Yuri.

Being afraid of Yuri hearing what she had to say, Jessica kept her thought to herself and repeated those three words within a place where Yuri could not reach.

‘I love you, too, Yuri.’

★★★

That was a year ago, and Jessica wished she could have say what she needed to then. If she had, then she wouldn’t have to lose Yuri like this. 

Yuri was at the tip of her finger and there was no effort required to just simply reach for the girl she loves. Every time Yuri would take a step forward, she would take three steps backward, ignoring what her heart had desperately cried out for. Jessica comprehended it all well that Yuri could have easily been hers without her needing to even try. As the matter of fact, Yuri was hers; Jessica just never officially claimed the girl.

Unfortunately, something had always held her back from saying those three words that Yuri yearned to hear. She knew Yuri was being serious about wanting to start a relationship, but Jessica had thought about other worldly things that could be the worst of consequences later in life. Their friends, their families…society… but did all of that matter? Jessica came to understand that none, in fact, should be, or could be, of any interference to her happiness. To their happiness. Even if any of them was to be a hardship to their relationship, they will come to accept it as part of life just like any other problem they had to face every day. 

She realized that a tad too late.

Pulling out her phone upon being notified of an incoming message, she opened the text newly received from Tiffany. 

“Do your best, okay, Jessie! Give it your all out there! Don’t you dare hold Taeyeon’s hands or you will know torture when you come back home! Fighting, Jessie!” 

‘Is this supposed to be more of an encouragement or a threat?’

Scanning through the words on the screen, a glittering smile slid on her face as she happily resumed to her preparations for the performance.

On a side note, the message had further read:

“P.S. I ran into your Yuri. Prince charming is here, princess. Just thought I let you know v(^__^)”

★☆★

“Joo Hyun…”

“Yoona-unnie! Are you alright?!” 

Before Yoona could respond as to why or how her best friend had suddenly ended up appearing in front of her cousin’s residence, the girl was trailed back into the living room. Seohyun began her examination of Yoona’s condition from head to toe with a worried expression glued to her face. Her best friend took her by the shoulder and slightly spun her around, lifting up the girl’s pajamas sleeves and checking for any signs of injuries.

If she was fine when she got up from the bed, she was absolutely not fine now with Seohyun obliviously touching her all over the place. Tensed up and somewhat uncomfortable, Yoona lightly shoved her friend away from her.

“Hey, Hyunnie, I’m fine so-”

“I was so worried about you.”

Yoona took a short glance at her friend, and she was sure her heart came to a momentary pause. What could break her more than her beautiful angel shedding tears in front of her?

But then again…the fault was hers.

“You always pick up my phone calls within twenty minutes span or at least text back, but you did not even pick up even one single call yesterday. I came to your house and your dad said you haven’t been home the whole night. I was restless in thinking that something bad might have happened to you. Please, don’t do that again!”

Yoona watched as Seohyun swiping off the tears from her face, helplessly trying to stop them from falling. Yoona held back the tempting force on her arms, and stood doing nothing further to comfort the girl. She had managed maintain a fair distance between them, and she wasn’t going to break it now. 

“I’m sorry…” was all she could say. 

She remained motionless and speechless. Her reason for ignoring all of those desperate calls and texts she had been receiving was not something she could merely blurt out to Seohyun. And even if Yoona did choose say those three words she had refrained from speaking of, a word of apology will never be enough to tie their tangled threads back together once the confession had been voiced.

That was what she was afraid of.

“You should go home. I’ll be fine,” Yoona lied, reluctantly taking a few steps back.

Seohyun wiped her face clean of her tears and put on a reassuring smile. “I want to stay here until you get better,” she persisted, already setting her bag aside on the sofa and heading toward the kitchen. 

The younger girl rolled up her sleeves and then went off to scan the cabinets. She searched for specific ingredients and items and neatly placed them on the counter one by one.

“What are you doing?” Yoona questioned, observing her friend from the distance as her muscles pain had forbid her to walk forward any farther. 

“I’m making you food. You can’t cook for yourself with your current condition. Besides, Yuri-unnie and Sooyoung-unnie won’t be home until later,” Seohyun replied while setting the pot on the heated stove in her midst of preparing the meal.

“You don’t have to. I can cook for myself.”

Eyebrow furrowed and expression darkened, Seohyun dropped the supplies in her hands and stomped toward the bewildered Yoona. The older girl swallowed the lump that had been caught in while taking a few small steps backward. At times like this, it was appropriate for Yoona to say that she was truthfully frightened of what her friend could do to her with just a look in the eyes.

After only a few seconds of their wordless staring contest, Yoona lowered her head in defeat and subdued to her best friend’s wishes, “I-I got it. Do what you like…”

“Good.” A smile of victory flashed on Seohyun’s face as a result. 

Supporting Yoona by the arms, Seohyun carefully led her best friend back to the room for some rest.

Yoona climbed onto the bed compliantly as Seohyun brought the comforter over her.

“Now, get some sleep and I’ll wake you up later.”

“Hyunnie?”

“Hmm?”

“Thank you.”

Seohyun returned the appreciation with a gentle curve of her lips.

The younger girl then closed the door behind her and strolled back to the kitchen.

Her smile faded.

☆★☆

Waiting impatiently outside the locked doors of the concert hall, fans used the remaining minutes until the show started to chat leisurely about their fandom to each other. Some were looking proudly at their custom designs boards crafted to cheer on specific idols of their liking and others were practicing fan chants quietly in separate groups. The crowd’s whispers died down and eventually came to a momentary halt when a tall and tan lady around her twenties, dressed in black leather and a pair of wayfarers, walked casually down the pathway. Many eyes landed onto their new attraction, whispering among each other in question of her identity.
The girl paid no mind to the looks she was retrieving and approached the crowd to confirm what she needed to.

“Is the entrance straight ahead?”

The fans nodded in affirmation and earned themselves a grateful smile. Their curious eyes continued to trail toward the young lady as she continued to her way to the gates.

Not caring much about all the attention on her, the girl took off her shades and walked up to the staff members guarding the gate.

“I’m sorry, miss, but the show doesn’t start until 6:15PM. I ask that you please wait patiently in this line,” one of the staff members informed, stopping the girl from going any further.

“Yes, I know, but a friend of mine had handed me this ticket. I believe that I get to go in before the show begins, or so I was told,” the young girl replied, pulling out the special pass from her purse.

“This is indeed a VIP ticket. May I have your name, miss?” 

“Kwon Yuri.”

The whispers around her soon turned into a mess of loud rumoring voices upon eavesdropping on her name.

“Oh, you’re Jessica-sshi’s friend! I apologize. Please, come right in,” the staff member bowed politely to the person before him and quickly asked his partner to strap off the hook blocking the doorway.

“Thank you,” Yuri expressed her gratitude before handing her ticket to the young man.

“You should keep that, miss. It includes a backstage pass that enable to you to tour around here after the show is done. Just present it to our other staff members and they will let you in,” the staff explained.

Yuri merely nodded in acknowledgement and held onto the small piece of paper while walking through the doors which had been opened for her.

She took a careful observation at the stage and at all the tired, hardworking staff members helping out with the preparations before the show. There were also other special guests already seated in their proper seating in the three front rows. Apparently, Yuri was unable to recognize anyone she knew among the crowd, but it was not like she was searching for anyone in particular. Unfortunately, no artists were spotted around the area, including the ones she wished to see.

‘Maybe they’re getting ready.’

Yuri took small steps toward her seat as she examined the ticket in her hand.

‘Backstage, huh? I guess it’s not a VIP ticket for nothi-’ 

A rough collision had clashed onto Yuri’s back without warning as the tall girl find it hard to maintain her balance from toppling on her killer heels.

“I-I’m sorry! Are you alri-”

“It’s okay. Are you fin-”

A short silence broke in between the two girls standing before each other. They stood in front of the other with agape mouths and slowly widening eyes. 

After all, it had been one year since they had last seen each other.

“Y-Yuri!?”
“Tiffany!”

A tackling embrace was necessary on Tiffany’s half, as she the older girl leaped on Yuri with arms tightly squeezing the taller girl in her grasp. Yuri returned the hug, patting her friend’s back with a warm smile on her face.

Tiffany held onto Yuri’s hands even if she had let go and observed the girl from head to toe, “My gosh, you’re so gorgeous! I’m jealous.”

“Aren’t I always?” Yuri asked jokingly, earning herself a light punch on her shoulder, “I’m kidding. You’re really beautiful, too. How have you been, Tiffany?”

“Healthy and well,” Tiffany replied, winking her eye smile.

“I see you still have that charisma in you.”

“Oh, of course,” Tiffany giggled, her eyes forming crescent moons once again. “How about you? Doing fine?”

“Tired from dealing with problematical happenings at work, but I’m learning to sort things out slowly.”

“Ahhs. Under training to become a CEO soon aren’t you?” 

Yuri tilted her head as her eye brows furrowed. “How did you know?”

“Girl, you’re all over the news. Plus, I went to your family’s welcome-home party but I couldn’t find you to say hi.”

“Oh, I see. Well, I’m really sorry for not informing you about the party. I lost your phone number and contact, but I’m glad you came,” Yuri apologized, rubbing the back of her head as she made short bows to her friend. “By the way, who told you about it?”

“Your cousin and her friend, Seohyun, invited Jessica and I to your party. We were afraid that we’re somewhat intruding, but I’m glad to know that we were welcomed.”

Tiffany purposely threw in some emphasis, specifically on a certain name, and secretly observed Yuri for any change of expression. But unfortunately to her, there was none. 

Or at least…none was visible to Tiffany’s eyes.

“That makes more sense now,” Yuri nodded a couple of times while averting Tiffany’s intense stare as she directed her change her view to the stage in front of them. She furtively buried her left hand into her leather jacket’s pocket, curling her fingers as she gripped onto the fabric. Her name somehow always managed to cast an anxiety disorder onto Yuri, whether she wanted it or not.

“So, did you come here to see Jessica?” The tan girl turned to her friend in question, sounding out her name as if it was no trouble for the girl to speak of it.

“I’m also here for TaeYeon.”

“You two seem rather close. Did you two know each other before the party?”

“We are close. And no, we met each other at the party,” Tiffany answered, accentuating on her relationship with their mutual friend. “So, what about you? Who did you came here to see?”

“Same as you.”

“Shall we get to our seats then?”

Tiffany skipped ahead with Yuri casually strolling along. The tan girl took another quick look at her surroundings. It had been one year since she had last been to a concert and being at this place brought back a nostalgic emotion to her.

‘I have another chance at hearing her live again,’ Yuri beamed, reminiscing the last time she had heard the angelic voice casting its remedy among the crowd.

“Yuri-unnie?”

A voice similar to that of her angel, although carrying a deeper tone in contrast, called out to her name. Alerted, Yuri turned to her side to face, yet, another close friend she had not seen in months.

“Krystal? Soojung? Is that…Is that really you?”

“Yuri-unnie!” 

Getting up from her seat in haste, the young girl impatiently dashed through the row (practically jumping over some of its occupants) and threw her arms over her older friend.

“You’ve grown a lot kid,” Yuri remarked, slightly ruffling the little girl’s hair with her arm positioned awkwardly since the girl was much taller than the last time they had met.

“Unnie, I’m not a kid anymore,” Krystal pouted, scrunching up her nose.

It was a habit that had reminded Yuri of the girl’s older sister.

Clearing , Tiffany hoped to have gained some attention back to her when she was suddenly ignored by the sweet reunion.

“Oh, hi, Tiffany-unnie!” Krystal waved to the other girl standing beside Yuri, smiling cheerfully.

“Hello there, Krys. How did you get in so early? And this is the VIP seating…” Tiffany gave the younger girl a short hug before voicing her question in wonder.

“The staff remembered me as Jessica’s lil’ sis, so I got the privilege to be in here early. He also said there were extra VIP seats today so we get to sit here,” Krystal replied, laughing proudly at her title. 

“Wait, so you didn’t get a VIP pass, Krystal?” Yuri questioned, being confused with the situation before her.

“There’s only one given per artist, and I believe Jessica gave it to one of her friends didn’t she?”

“Yup, she did,” Tiffany answered in behalf of the dazed out Yuri, whom she had taken careful notice of.

Yuri gripped onto the ticket in her hand as she realized that, even after so long, she still held some sort of importance to Jessica’s heart. That, itself, was simple enough to make her happy.

“By the way, I want to introduce you to my friends, Yuri-unnie!” Krystal turned back to her row seating and presented to the older girl her little group. “This is Amber, Sulli, and Luna.”

Two of the three girls bowed politely, while the more Americanized one smiled and waved as the older ones returned the courtesy with their own form of greetings.

“It’s sad that one of our other friend wasn’t able to come with us today…” Krystal mumbled under her breath as her three friends nodded in response. “Anyhow, would you like to sit here with us?” Krystal invited, moving her bag out of the non-occupied seat.

Tiffany and Yuri glanced at each other before coming in terms of agreement.

“We’d love to.”

☆☆☆

“Hyun, I really like you. Will you go out with me?”

It had come all too unexpectedly when her childhood friend had confessed to her later that night after their family gathering. Standing at the same place of where he had last told her of his feelings two years ago while being under the umbrella which had shielded them from the rain, Yonghwa placed his hands on Seohyun’s shoulders and softly placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. Though, she did nothing but remained immobilized from her spot.

There were too many things going on in her mind at that moment that had prevented her to react in any other way but respond straightforwardly to his confession.

“Oppa, I’m sorry but I don’t feel the same way.”

“You can give me a chance. Please, let me show you that I can be the one for you,” Yonghwa pleaded, grabbing Seohyun’s hand tightly into his own. 

She had considered the thought long ago, but that was before she met Yoona. It was before her heart had fallen for her best friend so deep that it would require much effort to climb back up. Seohyun eyed the floor, drawing her thoughts imaginatively on the cracks of the tiles. In her mind, she was standing before a fork road, splitting in two ways leading toward two consequences heading forward onto two different futures. 

One, she could reject him and stayed true to her feelings while clinging onto her love secretly, despite knowing that eventually she would have to let go of it sooner or later.

Two, she could accept Yonghwa’s confession and give him a chance, which, if they do work out, the two could lead a happy life together. 

She looked back up at him as his eyes had never left hers. He was waiting patiently for her answer, while being intimidated by the sound of heavy rain drops plopping on the surface of their umbrella one after another, filling their silence. 

Hope… Seohyun was afraid of destroying it, because she understood the feeling of living with a broken one.

★★★

“Hey Taeyeon, Jessica-sshi, you two are up next. Be ready and head out in this direction when the emcee introduces you two. Do your best out there!” 

Taeyeon nodded upon hearing her manager’s reminder and kind encouragement while Jessica continued to space out in her own little world, silently running the lyrics through her head. 

“Hey, we’re up next,” Taeyeon informed her partner, giving the dazed princess a light tap on the shoulder.

“Oh. Okay.”

Viewing behind the curtains at the energetic crowd that were awaiting for the next appearances, Taeyeon and Jessica shook with nervousness as they held tightly onto each other’s hands. Indeed, this was not their first time performing live in front of many, including fans and a few of those haters among the audience, but that was not at all the reason for their hasty beating hearts.

Taeyeon crept behind Jessica in wonder of what was catching the girl’s attention so much that she had not once looked away from it ever since they were finished with their dressing.

“What are you looking at?” 

“Them.”

Jessica pointed specifically to the front seats as Taeyeon trailed her eyes from the girl’s protruded finger to their subject of attention.

They unconsciously swallowed the lump in their throats the moment both their eyes had landed on the ones they were searching for among the bustling crowd. There it was again, performers’ worst fear: nervousness.

They had chosen to sing a duet for these very reasons: to be beside one another, to comfort each other, and to say that everything will be fine. Together, they would have the courage to sing out loud those emotions within their hearts even if the rest of the audience were oblivious to their intentions behind the lyrics. Of course, the song was only meant for the ones it was delivered to, and as long as Yuri and Tiffany were there to listen, then all was well.

“Hey, what is Tiffany holding up?” Jessica asked curiously, poking the girl beside her while pointing to the hyperactive, eye-smiling queen in the third row.

“Some kind of large, pink paper…?” Taeyeon replied, tip-toeing on her heels while hunching over Jessica (who was not that much taller than her). “I think it said my name…”

“Your very special nickname you mean. TaeTae, with a heart shape drawing.” A mischievous smile spread across Jessica’s lips. She then playfully elbowed Taeyeon, in which the other girl grunted in the pain from the rather violent contact.

“What was that for?” Taeyeon glared strangely at her dongsaeng while rubbing her bruised waist.

“Since when have you guys been that close as to even exchange nicknames? I noticed how you called her ‘Fany’.”

“I-It’s just easier to say…”

Tapping the tip of index finger against her chin, Jessica puckered her lips in amusement, and soon smirked when a devilish plan slipped across her mind. She had always been waiting for a day to get back at her best friend for all the not-so-funny teases the girl had pulled off on her, and now was her chance. Of course, her best friend’s much undesirable name was going to be the key to her scheme.

“You know, she’d like it a lot of if you call her by ‘Miyoung’.”

Taeyeon tilted her head slightly; the name did not bring any relevance in regards to Tiffany as far she knew. 

“Miyoung? Why’s that?”

“That’s her Korean name. She absolutely loves it when people call her that,” Jessica playfully deluded, much to Taeyeon’s obliviousness. She thought throwing some implied emphasis there and then along the statement would help further with her plan. Her…not-so-nice plan. “But don’t tell her I told you so.”

“Oh, I see. Hwang Miyoung…okay, I’ll keep that in mind! Thanks, Jessica!” 

Jessica glanced at Taeyeon, now feeling regretful at her no-one-is-definitely-going-to-be-hurt-by-this prank. She then mumbled an apology under her breathe, just in case if anything harmful would happen to her sunbae.

“Has she always been this beautiful?” Taeyeon whispered, not directing the question to any one in particular. In fact, it was a mere accident the words had slipped from .

“Looks like someone is Fany-fan,” the blonde girl snickered (partially because of her own random play of word) while sending several light nudges of the elbow to the older girl’s arm.

Taeyeon fought back the wide grin escaping to her lips but failed to hide the blush on her cheeks, in which her friend had already taken notice of and was prepared to for it.

Though their small chat soon ended as the emcee’s words rang attention to their minds.

“The next performance is about a sweet unrequited love that cannot be spoken as it was buried in the deep. And up next is ‘Can You Hear Me?’, a special duet brought to you by the composer, Kim Taeyeon, herself, with the feature of a new singer into the music industry, Jung Jessica!”

This was it.

“You ready?” Taeyeon turned to ask her dongsaeng, tightening the grip on their hands to sooth both of their worries.

Taking a deep breather, Jessica nodded, and together they stepped on the platform with linked hands seeking assurance.

The moment their eyes managed situated to the lights that had blinded their vision, their hearts were filled with warmth. 

‘She’s really here,’ so they both thought.

The melody started, their cue was on, and the show continued.

★☆★

“Say ahh…” 

Yoona furrowed her eyebrow and glared at the congee-filled served in front of her. She sent a look at Seohyun, who simply nodded at her friend’s unvoiced question and was patiently waiting for the girl to heed her simple order. The sick girl reverted her attention back down on the metal piece, which had not moved from where she last seen it, and huffed out a sigh. With much reluctance, Yoona opened and abided to her best friend’s command, to which the other girl beamed at her obedience. She couldn’t help but felt like a dependent child useless of doing anything without the help of others. However, that was what all sick men had to go through, and she was no exception. Though, she couldn’t be gladder that she even had someone to care for her.

“How is it?” Seohyun asked, scooping another mouthful from the bowl.

Yoona quickly swallowed the heated food down before throwing up two thumbs-up in indication of her satisfaction. 

“Excellent.”

“You better not be lying to me because you have to finish this either way, good or bad,” Seohyun noted, continuing to feed the ‘help-in-need-.’

“I’m not lying; it really is good,” Yoona replied, gulping down another spoon-full. “But do you really have to do this? I mean I’m perfectly fine to do this by mysel-”

“No!”

“B-”

“No buts!”

“I-”

Seohyun shoved another portion to Yoona, silencing the girl immediately. Knowing the uselessness of her pestering, Yoona complied and just swallowed the food that had been served to .

“Just eat. You’re not allowed to do any physical activity, and that will also include eating by yourself,” Seohyun persisted.

“Does that mean you’re going to be here the whole night?”

“If I have to, then yes.”

Yoona rolled her eyes while allowing her palm to meet with her face. “That’s ridiculous, Hyunnie. It’s a Saturday, so you need some time off yourself. Your head has been focusing too much on those self-improvement books.”

“You’re the ridiculous one, unnie. How did you even get sick anyway? A high fever, too. I texted you about how it’s going to rain at night, and even told you to bring an umbrella if you were going anywhere. But wait, you didn’t check any of my text. Too bad for you.”

Yoona could tell that Seohyun was still bearing a grudge on her for not replying to any of the girl’s sent messages. She immediately made a mental note in her mind to be careful about not to anger her best friend, for she was not the type to easily let things go and would somehow later cleverly use them against her.

“Besides, I am resting. Just not alone.”

“You have Yonghwa-sshi, don’t you?” Yoona munched hard on the congee in as if they were crackers, while jealousy continued to build itself in her speech.

“I’m much more comfortable with you, unnie.”

Yoona glanced at Seohyun’s neutral expression and permitted a satisfying smile to escape from her lips. She really liked what she had heard. However, she pushed it further.

“Yonghwa could keep you in much better company than me, a sick weakling who is not even allowed to be self-fed.”

“Don’t worry, unnie. I will always be with you when you need me.”

“But I-”

The older girl held her tongue along with the words almost slipping from her lips unwillingly.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

Seohyun let it be and stood up from the bed when she had finished feeding Yoona the last bit of the girl’s meal.

“Hopefully you’ll recover before Monday, but for now, rest,” Seohyun demanded, dropping the spoon in the bowl and picking it up.

“Thank you, Hyunnie,” Yoona said with a warm smile, expressing gratitude for Seohyun’s much appreciated kindness.

“No problem.” 

Yoona watched as Seohyun flashed a sincere smile at her before heading out the door of the bedroom. The older girl huffed out a sigh as she used the time alone to review on her actions while her friend was in the kitchen washing the dishes (most of which belonged to Sooyoung).

She knocked back her head and gently leaned it against the soft cushion of the pillow. Yoona had to say she was doing quite a ‘great’ job on holding back from what she really wanted to say and any confessions that should have really been made. However, how long she would be able to continue doing so was of uncertainty. 

Because, moments like these, Yoona felt as if her love for her friend was growing to endless boundaries.

“Is it too greedy to say I always need you by my side?”

The clanking and the sound of splashing water had already stopped in the kitchen, much to Yoona’s unawareness. And further to her obliviousness, Yoona’s voiced thoughts had been heard not only by her alone. 

☆★☆

Yuri held on tightly to the armrest upon hearing Taeyeon and Jessica’s names being called in announcement. Yuri peeked slightly to her left upon noticing the shuffling movements of the seat beside her. Tiffany was already waving excitedly her placard dedicated to Taeyeon back and forth as her eye-smile continued to radiate even if the spotlight was not shone on her. Yuri was certain that there was something much more going on between Tiffany and Taeyeon, but her train of suspicious thoughts was immediately pushed aside when the speakers started to give its way to the melody and the crowd behind her began to hustle with wild cheers.

Yuri watched in awe as her two friends walked up on stage in simple but gorgeous outfits. Even without the lighting on the stage, Yuri was sure that they would shine nonetheless.

Soundtrack 01: Can You Hear Me?
(A/N: Instrumental doesn't distract your reading as much, but if you want the original, you can search that up and listen while you read this part. Taeyeon's parts are in blue, Jessica's parts are in purple, and duets are in pink.)

Even though it hurts but a little, tears form.
My heart screams out
if I pass in front of you, beside you.
You were my whole world.
I want only you.
But I can’t breathe when I’m in front of you.

The first note of the song trailed into the air, and Taeyeon brought the microphone closer to her. Voicing the lyrics from her heart, she brought the crowd to silence as they listened to the heavenly sounds.

The lyrics were deep, just as she expected of her friend’s spectacular skills of hitting on her listener’s emotions. And Yuri was no exception, as it had hit her hard enough to have recalled her time of the past ― memories of Jessica. 

No, to be precise, they were memories with Jessica.

Important moments that she refused to let go no matter how much it hurt her to hold on. They were more than just merely precious to her, because, truly, they were what kept her going.

As if you weren’t my destiny…
As if this was just a fleeting moment…
Next to you, who just let me go easily,
I go closer to you step by step,
Although I cannot move at all


Upon hearing the voice of her beloved one of her life, Yuri was brought even further to the past… 
…to the times when awkwardness ceased to exist between them…
…to the times when it was normal for them to exchange touches and stares…
…to the times when the word ‘love’ meant nothing more than a friendly term to them both.

Back then, Yuri didn’t know of the special affection she had for her best friend. Everything seemed normal to her…to them.

However, the moment she befriended Jessica, Yuri knew that the girl would be more than just another person filling an empty space in her life.

She knew Jessica was more than just a ‘someone’.

☆☆☆

You make me restless, you make me cry
like a fool, like a child.
I want to just laugh it off instead.
The closer I get to you,
although I get more scared,
I guess I cannot stop this love.

“Hey give me that!” 

Struggling for the camera in her best friend’s possession, Yuri shuffled left and right, forward and backward, but still continued to fail time after time. After several non-successful attempts to corner the older girl when she desperately tried to snatch the item away, Yuri shook her head and eventually gave in as she resumed putting on her shirt. 

Even if they were at her house and no other resident was around except for Jessica and herself, running around only with ed pants and loose-hanging shirt was still rather embarrassing. Though, she was the only one that was feeling that way, as Jessica was having no problem with witnessing the troubled Yuri chasing after her and was, in fact, enjoying herself. After all, she was not the victim to her own threatening pranks.

However, the only real reason she had decided to step back and let the girl do what she wished was because of the unknown pressuring heat surging within her body whenever she succeeded in trapping Jessica in her arms for that split second. 

‘Maybe it’s the heat,’ she would falsely persuade herself.

Why is it just my love that is late?
Why is it just my love that is hard?
Although I’m right in front of you, although I’m right beside you…
You were my whole world.
I see only you.
But when I’m in front of you, I always look away.

“What are you planning to do with my half- pictures? Stare at them before you sleep?” Yuri pretended to cover up her nervousness of what Jessica could pull off with a playful front.

The chocolate hair girl continued buttoned up her shirt, facing her back to the smirking blonde, who was still stubbornly snapping random pictures with that camera of hers. 

Yuri was getting ready to her job interview but was encountered by Jessica’s sudden appearance at her doorstep. Of course, she did not hear a word about it or was even aware of such until the older girl had been easily permitted entrance by none other than Yuri’s carefree mother, whom held a special trust for the blonde. Unfortunately, Yuri was still in the process of changing into her business attire when Jessica had invaded her and freely barged into the dressing room without warning. Before she could react with any questions of inquisition, Jessica had already taken advantage of the tool in her hand with her as the subject to its lens.

Truthfully, she was quite abashed about Jessica watching her change, despite the older girl claiming of the fact that the latter should have nothing to worry over since they were the ‘best of friends.’ 

‘I really shouldn’t have given that to her…’

Yuri sighed, regretting her choice of gift to the blonde prankster.

“I’m just using what you give to me wisely. These photos will be useful in the future,” Jessica snickered, “that is, if you decide to cheat on me.” 

“We’re not dating, Sica. Why would we when I’m y, popular, beautiful and you’re little, creepy, and erted,” Yuri mocked jokingly.

As if you were my very last.
As if it were my very last moment.
Next to you, who just let me go so easily,
I go closer to you again step by step,
Although I cannot move at all.

“But I know that’s what you love about me. I’m Kwon-seobang’s little, erted creeper,” Jessica replied nonchalantly, viewing back on her shots of perfection.

A small smile appeared on Yuri’s lips.

“True that.”

After succeeded of putting her shirt on peacefully, Yuri removed her eyes from the walls. Staring it for a prolong period of time was starting to give her the peeves.

“Yuri.”

“Hmm?”

The blonde approached the younger girl and, without warning, started ing the girl’s shirt. Yuri froze instantly as her hands wandered to the walls behind her as if grasping for support. Her breathing grew short, her head was spinning, and her ears were red. Nothing was normal anymore.

At that moment, her only instinctive desire was to wrap her arms against Jessica’s waist. As to why, she did not understand.

“You missed a button. What’s happening to you? You’re usually not this clumsy.”

As much as she wanted to answer that all-knowingly, Yuri, herself, did not know the reason.

★★★

You make me restless, you make me cry,
like a fool, like a child.
I want to just laugh it off instead.
The closer I get to you,
although I get more scared,
I guess I cannot stop this love.

Deep down, Yuri knew she was a coward for not accepting her own feelings. Every step she took was only to go backward. Those steps would start to become wider, and eventually…she ran, with head nodded in defeat.
However, it didn’t took Yuri long to come crawling back to where she belonged.

☆☆☆

“Are you afraid of what would happen when we grow up?” Jessica wondered, examining the photographs she had taken of her and Yuri.

“No, not really. Are you?” 

“Yeah.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know what the future might hold for me. I don’t know who will be there, who has left, and who will have changed.”

Jessica was speaking of reality, a saddening truth that they would have to soon bear with in acceptance.

A short silence intruded their peace as both girls took time to contemplate about the time ahead of them. The possibilities that would be given to them as choices are uncountable as well as the paths they would choose to walk through. To think that their days until graduation were shortening was something that had hoped for had suddenly become something that they were reluctant to see an ending to.

If even from a long distance,
I could look upon you.
That’s what you call love.


“Yuri, I want you to be part of my future.”

The younger one quickly turned to look at the blonde, eyes widening as her cheeks deepened in a pinkish tone of color.

“Are you proposing to me?”

“I’m serious, Yuri. I have a hunch that something is going to separate us. Just thinking about it I-”

“Sica, remember that even if I can’t be part of your future, I am always part of your memories. That is just as important.”

Even if those words were meant to comfort Jessica, Yuri was clear as to why she had decided to say them. She meant them mostly for herself; the words were to assure her own awareness of the days ahead even if it was only for a fleeting moment.

★★★ 

If perhaps this yearning, this longing,
when it sounds, when it touches,
please just act like you didn’t know.
Although the closer I get to you, the more scared I get
I guess I cannot stop this love.

However, what both of them had feared of the future had eventually become their present. Their relationship was no longer what it was before they had moved toward two different paths. 

Everything had changed the minute Yuri had fell in love. Everything had changed when she aborted on that airplane. Everything had changed in just a year.

“Sica…even if you get accepted or rejected, you know for sure that you’ll always have a shoulder to lean on and ears to listen to your stories. I will always be there for you. I love you.”

“Yeah… I know. Thank you, Kwon Seobang.”

Nothing was the same any more.

Now, ‘casual’ friends were not even the right term to define them both, and even if Yuri’s hope still remained, it had already been broken. It had become tattered pieces that would take a miracle to heal.

Still, she could not stop this love.

===========================

SORRY READERS D: I'm back now \(^__^; ) You can all safely put down your weapons and cast them aside ha...haha...
Truthfully, I was lazy. I'm not going to make excuses for that except for the fact that I have been losing inspirations until recently.
I can't assure you when will be the next time I update but I can assure you it won't be another month (^__^ll) School already started for me OTL
My plans and the sequence I had planned for this had changed drastically so expect some surprises later on.
From now on, I will also be adding in 'soundtracks' to enhance your reading hehe 
See you guys again 'soon'~
-June