moonbyul was not able to sleep a wink after having come to that conclusion. she kept tossing and turning in bed, finally giving up and just lying on her back, staring at the ceiling.

she looked over to her left, the big red ‘0347’ glaring at her, as though taunting her about her lack of sleep. she tried to close her eyes, but all that kept popping up was that image of joohyun sitting on the floor after she had bumped into her, hair tousled and a confused expression on her face. even when the careless girl got bits of sauce on the side of her lips that moonbyul would for, and when joohyun would fall asleep in the break room, her hair falling all over her face, moonbyul saw nothing but beauty in the girl’s most candid moments.

joohyun did not have to try to be pretty, she just naturally was.

moonbyul got startled and sat up, placing a hand over her chest only to find her heart racing at twice the speed. i can’t like her. not when…  she trailed off. it was a pathetic attempt at convincing herself, even she would have to admit that.

moonbyul could not like her. not when she knows that deep down, she had not fully accepted the breakup that happened way too long back. a part of her still missed and loved yongsun, and an even tinier part still believes that they are still meant to be. she had gotten used to the older girl’s presence and expression of love that the past few months of living alone in her apartment felt so lonely.

they were that couple. the university’s dream couple that everyone who knew, knew.

but now yongsun was just a sun shaped hole in moonbyul’s heart that nothing seemed to be able to fill.

moonbyul let out a loud groan, frustrated at the times she cannot seem to shake off and stop its effects on. she flopped back onto her back, mindlessly staring ahead of her into nothing but darkness wondering just how messed up her life was. she never asked to fall for joohyun, much less when she was still not fully over her ex.

//

“woah, what happened to you? late night out with the couple?” chorong said upon seeing moonbyul rush through the doors of the breakroom.

the poor girl ended up falling asleep 30 minutes before her alarm rang, and slept through it, only waking up 10 minutes before she had to leave for work. she had rushed out of the house, resulting in her hair being messily combed through only with her fingers, and her barely noticeable socks were of different colours not to mention her eyes were seconds from closing shut.

she glanced at the older girl and muttered a quick, “couldn’t sleep,” continuing to rummage through her locker before she pulled out her khaki uniform to change into.

“welp, i’m about to head out, i’ll come check up on you and probably bring you food in a couple hours okay? hang in there byul!” chorong said and tossed a breakfast bar from her bag onto the bench behind the girl before stalking out the door.

moonbyul yelled a quick “see you and thank you!” and hurried into the changing rooms, pulling off her clothes in a hurry, not bothering to lock the door since there was no one in the breakroom anyway. or so she thought.

she was struggling with the top of her uniform stuck on her head when she heard a meek “um… byul?” coming from outside. moonbyul froze, and then unfroze to quickly pull the top over her head.

joohyun was standing outside the cubicle moonbyul was using, the door somehow having opened by itself since it was not locked. it was joohyun’s red cheeks and wide eyes, mouth slightly open, that told moonbyul that joohyun had seen something she was not expecting. , she saw me in my bra. moonbyul’s own cheeks flushed a similar shade of the older girl, having found herself caught in a somewhat compromising situation.

“the park’s filled with kids today, you better get out there fast byul,” joohyun rushed out, turning around and walking into the cubicle beside moonbyul’s, holding her bunny mascot outfit.

“uhhh yeahhh…”

moonbyul shut the door to her cubicle, and making sure it was locked this time, proceeded to strip her jeans she had worn.

“wait, joohyun, i thought today was your off day?” moonbyul said over the wall, trying to fill up the awkward silence that ensued after that.

“oh jisoo called in sick, and bossman told me to step in for her this morning.”

“ahh, such a hard worker, getting all that money huh?”

“nooo, it’s just the children love the bunny, and many of them come here for the bunny, i couldn’t possibly rob them of that just for me to rest today.”

the park attendant felt her heart melt hearing those words from the other girl, thinking that it was no surprise why she had fallen for the other girl, before she caught herself. she shook her head to clear those thoughts, and after changing, stepped out.

//

it was a couple of days later of locking herself in her house and only leaving for work, along with less frequent replies to joohyun did moonbyul realise that she was being absolutely pathetic. she thought about her cowardice in running away from the whole situation, and felt an overwhelming urge to change it.

… but maybe she could have one last day of doing nothing with her life and be okay with that.

she swung her legs over the edge of the bed – yes, she was still in bed, being pathetic does that to people – and stood up, stretching her hands up and letting out a big yawn.

i should get food… the fridge is empty… convenience store it is! she concluded, walking into her closet and picking out at least something presentable to wear.

to her surprise, when she swung open her front door to leave her apartment, someone was standing on the other side, hand raised in the motion of knocking on the door.

“joohyun?”

“byul… going somewhere?”

“ah yeah… i was going to the convenience store downstairs, i ran out of food and drinks.”

“oh, can i come with you?”

“umm sure, why not.”

the two of them silently made their way to the convenience store, each occasionally stealing glances at each other but both not willing to speak up about the numerous thoughts running through their minds.

“why-!”

“byul!”

they both started talking at the same time, only to stop after the first word, repeatedly signalling for the other to go first, until moonbyul gave in.

“why were you outside my house?” she asked, causing the older girl to look down, smile slightly gone.

she explained that she noticed a change in the younger girl, how moonbyul seemed to be avoiding her, and she even noticed how her responses seemed less warm, apart from being less frequent – moonbyul did not even realise this until then – so joohyun wanted to come check up on moonbyul, after asking wheein for her address.

moonbyul was caught off-guard, not expecting joohyun to pay this much attention to her, noticing things moonbyul was not even conscious of. “o-oh… um thank you for your concern, but i’ll be fine! just some stuff cropped up, but i’ll sort it out soon and be back to normal.”

joohyun gave a firm nod of the head, a serious look on her face before a small smile grew to show her support for the younger girl’s determination.

by this time, they had reached the convenience store and moonbyul being the gentlewoman that she was, held open the door for joohyun, before stepping into the store herself. she invited joohyun to stay at her place for a while - seeing that she had travelled all the way to talk to moonbyul - and told her to pick out some food and drinks for them to have at her apartment.

a couple of minutes later, the two stepped out of the store, a couple of bags filled with ramyun, biscuits and chips, and a few bottles of drinks in hand.

//

the sky outside moonbyul’s apartment was now dark and the moon was peeking out from behind the clouds as the house owner bid farewell to joohyun at her doorway, giving her a tiny hug and a grin, watching the older girl walk to the lift lobby and only closing the door when the girl disappeared behind the lift doors.

they had spent several hours chatting over movies, having ramyun for dinner.

(“i really don’t mind byul, i bought all the ingredients for my special ramyun recipe that you might want to try?” joohyun said, when moonbyul offered to order chinese take out for them both)

they had really enjoyed themselves, from what moonbyul could tell at least, by the looks of the persistent presence of the beautiful smile on joohyun’s face. she occasionally found herself just admiring the other’s facial features, wondering how there could be someone as pretty as the other girl sitting in her apartment right then. the pearls of laughter that escaped from joohyun’s lips sounded like music to her ears, and moonbyul kept trying to hear it over and over again.

so when the girl was left to a now empty apartment, hints of the fun time they just had now left as the empty ramyun pot on her table and the television now rolling credits of the last movie that played, moonbyul found loneliness hitting her especially hard. she leaned her back against the door she had just closed and slid herself down to the ground and just sat in the doorway. she thought about how the last few hours seemed to just fly by, just as how they did whenever she was texting joohyun.

the loneliness was accompanied by something, a strange fierce feeling of wanting to settle the dilemma she felt from the whole breakup till now. thus, she stood up, walking to her room after grabbing her phone that was on the table, firing a quick text to wheein and hyejin. ‘yongsun still lives at my old apartment, right?’

//

standing in front of this very door had never been this daunting. moonbyul’s palms were clammy with perspiration, legs were trembling in their place and her stomach churned at the thought of what she was about to do. her arm seemed to be as heavy as lead, but she forced herself to pull it up and finally, gave the door 3 sharp knocks. she heard no movement from inside the house, and knocked again, when she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket.

‘the password is still the same, let yourself in. i’m in the bedroom.’

she did as the text told and stepping into the apartment felt like she was entering a time machine. from keying in their anniversary date into the keypad to walking into the apartment where it seemed like time stopped flowing since the day she left. maybe i’m not the only who’s stuck in the past. she walked past the living room and the kitchen into the hallway of the rooms, stopping in front of the room all the way at the end. she lifted her hand to the doorknob, but hesitated, taking in a deep breath before grabbing onto and turning it, pushing the door inwards.

inside, she saw yongsun sitting at their – or her – desk by the window, furiously typing away at her laptop, phone unlocked on their chat by the side. she must be late for another draft submission again, moonbyul thought to herself, before she quietly announced her presence, deciding to sit down on the side of the bed, causing it to sink down from her weight, and wait for the older girl.

(she knows yongsun well enough to know that even a fire will not stop her from pausing her writing mid-paragraph. every attempt in the past, no matter how much whining, that normally would work, bribery of ddeokbokki, and even an offering of a bunch of kisses never seemed to deter the older girl from focusing on the screen in front of her, fingers moving so fast, you would wonder how she was typing everything accurately.)

maybe that was why she was so good in be- what am i thinking. she is my ex for god’s sake. moonbyul got pulled out of her very inappropriate thoughts when yongsun finally turned around, flashing the very smile that moonbyul fell for. moonbyul expected her heart to skip a beat, but to her surprise, she felt nothing.

“hey, what’s up byul? i heard from the girls that you were coming but they didn’t explain why.”

now that moonbyul was sitting there, with her ex in front of her, she did not know what to say. she knew that she wanted some sort of closure, but she did not know how. they sat there, silence taking over the room, yongsun still looking curiously at moonbyul, while moonbyul just stared at the carpet that covered the floor.

“… byul?”

“i… um…” moonbyul trailed off, hearing the start of rain falling against the window outside.

pitter patter pitter patter

“you aren’t doing fine, and so am i. i think we both need some closure,” moonbyul said, a tone of finality in her voice. it seems she struck a chord in yongsun because she could visibly see the girl in front of her freeze up.

“how…”

“nothing in the apartment has changed, the pictures of us are still on the fridge, on the wall, on that freaking desk right there that you sit at daily. heck, i’m hoping you washed this bedsheet since that day, because it’s the same one as the day i left, and coincidentally the one you were about to have with that other girl with. you can’t possibly be okay.”

with every word that moonbyul let come out of , she saw the girl’s shoulders drooping, and the defeat slowly clouding over her eyes. but moonbyul did not stop. something told her they both needed to hear this, so she kept going, pointing out things that jumped out at moonbyul that told her yongsun was not okay. by the time she was done, yongsun was no longer looking at the younger, head dropped as tears silently fell from them.

that was the first time ever since That Day that they shared an honest conversation with one another. they bore their heart to each other, expressing emotions and reminiscing on the course of their relationship, the good and bad parts. Both ending up shedding tears and sitting on the floor, in each other’s arms, the heavy sense of responsibility of how their relationship went down being lifted simultaneously for them both. it felt like the self-blame for both parties were being addressed and clarified, bringing them both to a stage of closure and peace.

despite moonbyul leaving the apartment with the conclusion of both agreeing to stay away from each other for the time being, moonbyul was sure that they would end up meeting again, somehow somewhere. they were soulmates, it just so happened that it was not in the romantic aspect.

when she got out, the sun was yet again shining in the sky, the remnant raindrops falling lightly with an amazing double rainbow stretching across the sky. she snapped a quick picture, before she stepped into the sunshine, sending it to joohyun with the caption, ‘i thought of you when i saw it, it’s comparable to your beauty’, and could not help wondering about how different she was feeling compared to the last time she was there.  

a/n: i promise the next will be the last chapter,,, i needed to give moonsun closure, to let moonbyul move on without feeling guilt, so that was the objective before the grand (very fluffy) finale :D i hope you enjoyed and please leave an upvote or a comment bc they make me more motivated to finish the last chapter