I could see the panic in Wendys eyes. I could tell she was really worried about Irene and the possibility of her knowing the real problem at hand.

“Ok, well calm down we don’t know for sure that she is going to know. You are completely assuming. She is probably thinking that you are just weird as right now. Which is not exactly off brand now is it? “ I explained hoping that it in fact would ease her mind.

It seemed to work a little bit as she started to nod her head in agreement.

“Yeah, you are totally right. I bet she thinks I am just being a dramatic child. That's perfect. We can stick with that.” She said while nodding vigorously.

“OK. now you finish showering and then you should head to bed. I am going to talk to Irene and see how she is.” I said in a soft tone. I looked up at her and could see she was skeptical.

“About what?” She asked.

“ I swear nothing that has to do with you. I think her and I just need to squash a few things, that's all. We can’t be acting like this for much longer especially if we plan on doing promotions.” I explained. She once again agrees rather easily. I nodded towards the shower as I took my leave from the bathroom, making sure to lock the door behind me.

I looked down the hall and could see Irene had her bedroom light on. I walked slowly towards the door. I knew I was getting myself into deep with what is next to come but we had to settle this once and for all.

I marched up to her door very confidently and knocked.

*knock knock*

There was no answer, so I knocked again.

*Knock knock*

Again no answer. I knew exactly what she was doing. She thinks she can ignore me after having her way with all those words? Not happening. So I knocked even louder.

*KNOCK KNOCK*

“YAH! GO AWAY!” She yelled from the other side.

I was not going to give her the satisfaction of knowing I left when she told me to. SO I just barged in.

“You know its not polite to ignore people when they are knocking on your door.” I huffed out as I shut the door behind me.

“The point was for you to go away. I am not interested in talking right now Joy.” She said as she turned over in her bed.

“No, we are talking now. I need you to tell me what is going on. Because something isn’t right. First you get all pushy with Wendy about being out after the accident, then you accuse her of confessing to me, then you accuse her and I of dating. So what gives?” I demand

She huffed again and turned now to face me fully but stayed silent.

I just stared at her in return. I was not going to talk or leave until she started this conversation.

“Fine, I am sorry. Nothing is wrong. I just want to make sure that you are not dating within the group. You should already know my mind won't change.” She said with an eye roll.

I thought for a second about what to say next. I knew if I spoke of what I wanted to it could go one of two ways, bad or very bad.

“Irene, are you acting out because of what happened between us the other night?” I questioned softly. I could see her eyes widen and drop in shock.

“I told you that we will NEVER speak of that again. That has nothing to do with what is going on. It doesn’t even have anything to do with Wendy and you know that. I do not ever want to hear you bring it up again. “ She spoke with such venom in her voice It was enough for me to want to cry for a second.

I couldn't answer her. My voice was gone. I could feel myself biting the tears back as I nodded in agreement.

“Ok, sorry” I said.

I couldn’t help but think about what went on the other night. I made me sad to realize she will never understand.

“I am sorry I asked you to help Wendy out. I think It would be best if I finish the job and you continue on with your schedules. I don’t think you two spending time alone together is wise right now.

I was almost offended at the assumption she was making without actually making it.

“And you think she wants to be alone with you working on her problems after all you have said to her? She no longer feels safe with you. She no longer trusts you. You sit there all high and mighty because you are the leader but you are a raging homophobe and don’t want to admit it. Stop pretending and own it if that's how you want to live your life. “ I demanded as I stood upi ready to leave the dorm.

“You wait right there!” She hollered

“NO!” I lashed out.

*KNock knock*

“Who is it?” She switched to a kind voice.

“Unnie, are you both ok? Yeri and I are just worried with all the noise” Seulgi inquired with the softest voice imaginable.

She could tell things have been heated between us for a few days now and with no end in sight I am sure she and the youngest are a bit worried.

“ I am sorry bear, we will be quieter so you two can get some sleep” She said again with a fake cherry voice.

I was so annoyed just by the sight of her right now. How she thinks its ok to just offend people and then think she has nothing to be sorry for.

“Sit” She motioned towards her chair next to the foot of her bed.

I rolled my eyes and plopped down acting like sitting in silence for my death.

“You have things you need to work on. You want to tell me why all of a sudden you are super attached to Wendy? It's been like this for a few weeks now. Actually, since that night” She mentioned it this time, not me.

“You said we can’t talk about that” I whispered out.

“Listen, I am not made about that night. I understand things got heated and when that happens, things happen we do not intend. But I told you I could look past it. So why are you all of a sudden leaning on Wendy that much more?” She questioned softer this time.

I could tell she was trying to work on this and fix what has occurred over the last few days. But how can I explain to her that I am not doing what I am doing because of ME. It really is because of Wendy.

If Irene was not so daft, she would see how Wendy feels

I knew that it wouldn't happen. I knew that she could never see how Wendy feels. Even if she did she would act like she had no clue. I had no words though. I was actua;;y unable to bring a sentence forth to continue the conversation. It made me sick to my stomach, not only for me, but for Wendy.

“I think you are Wendy should spend less alone time together to start. And once things get back to normal we can alay off the restrictions.

:I told you her and I were joking. We are just being there for each other during a hard time. There are no underlying feelings Irene and YOU should know that.” I said while shoving a finger into the air towards her.

She was shaking her head no.

“No, I do not know that. But I do know what I heard and what I saw. And now that I know Wendy is a lesbina I do feel the need to make sure everyone knows what is and is not allowed. I don’t want anyone getting things confused and messing up their feelings because they think they know how they are feeling in the heat of the moment.” She explained it but gave very little room to argue.

I had to admit, I understand but I was sad. I was sad for Wendy. I was sad for myself. I was sad Wendy thinks she is not worth anyones love because Irene.

“I am letting you know now that there is nothing you can do that will prevent me from being with someone who is my best friend. I love Wendy like family and the fact that you think either of us would ruin that just to around means you don’t actually know us at all.” I finished and got up. I didn’t even want to give her the time of day right now. My heart was feeling two kinds of heartbreak and I do not have the emotional capacity to handle both of them.

“ I am sorry Sooyoung, but we need to have boundaries.” She said her last worried as she rolled back over in her bed and faced the wall.

I was upset. I did not like the fact that I was being told I was not allowed to be alone with Wendy. Irene did not trust me. So I got back at her the only way I knew would hurt her.

“Since you are the one who will be helping Wendy out from now on I think you should know who has hurt her so badly for her to talk to me this much” I said cryptically.

She turned around and stayed on her side with her upper body leaning against her arm.

“Who?” She asked seriously.

“You” I said before walking out and shutting the door behind me.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

“You” she said as she walked out of my room.

Me? What the did I do? I questioned myself. I couldn't think of anything. Sure the bathroom incident was…..weird. But no ill intent. ANd yet all of this is completely my fault?

I sat and thought about it. I couldn't help but wonder what I did? I thought back to that night. That incident played over in my head. I still couldn’t believe it to be honest. I surprised myself with my actions. Then this happened.

You saw Wendy , then held her all after calling her a lesbian

I was a good friend. Being a good leader. I know I should not have been so harsh but then needed to know relationships cannot be tolerated.

Now you need to figure out how I upset Wendy

I nodded to myself with determination. I grabbed my pillow and walked out into the hallway and marched right up to Wendys door.

Knock

I just stood there. I was not sure how to approach the situation. The first time I didn’t knock I heard things I should not have, the second time I saw things I