Four.
The Donee

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This place has endless routes, twists, and turns like a huge labyrinth. Of course, there’s no way out. Even if there is, it’s secured and it leads right where I began. There are security outposts at very strategic places and a lot of roaming aides wearing the same uniform as Minseok. They smile when I make eye contact with them and my expression softens almost immediately. And I don’t even know I tense up.

It’s impossible to break free from this circle. Everything will look the same. Step forward and you’re in the very same place. A step back and it’s like nothing has changed. Not even the perspective. I’m desperate to leave the illusion but not desperate enough to jump off one floor. So I take a random right to a random room.

There’s a scent that attacks my nose so stealthily that I only cover my nose a few seconds in. I don’t recognize it but it’s calming and a bit… sweet. I taste it on my mouth; that’s how strong it is. The place is warm compared to the outside. Everything is suddenly made of wood. And there’s some kind of soft music that plays and a light flow of water somewhere. I can’t see it but I can hear it. Somehow, I can taste it as well.

My tongue is a mess of unrecognizable scent when the receptionist’s smile pushes me back a little. It’s not creepy, not at all. But she’s been so still, I wouldn’t have known it’s a person if her lips didn’t stretch across.

“Hi,” she greets. “I’m sorry, did I surprise you?”

I just stare. She almost sounds like a robot but perhaps it’s just the way she talks.

“Tea?” she offers and there’s a serving plate with a ceramic teapot and a few overturned little cups on the side. They match the teapot’s makings and I wouldn’t dare touch it. “It’s chamomile.”

I frown. I don’t know what chamomile tea tastes like but I didn’t like the sound of it. “I’m good,” I say and she nods once.

“How may I help you?” She asks hands clasped over her abdomen.

“I’m just looking for something to do,” I tell her.

“Oh, you’re new!” She exclaims and loosens up her shoulders. “That makes us two. It’s my first day today,” she says and I have no idea what to tell her after that. Good thing she laughs and follows up immediately. “Would you like to try one of our facilities here at the spa?”

“This is a spa?”

“Yes, it is,” she says and hands over a pamphlet she takes from the sunken desk in front of her.

The Spa. It just says. There are various amenities in the spa. I can get a whole-body massage, a pedicure, a manicure, or have them done all at once. I can enjoy tea while I sit in the zen garden. There are yoga classes offered and a few meditation sessions throughout a day. There’s a whole bunch of things I can do here. But there’s one thing that catches my attention most. It doesn’t sound pleasing but it does pique my interest.

A sensory deprivation tank.

“What is this?” I ask the receptionist as I point at the final amenity on the brochure. The photo just shows what appears to be a pod with water and lights inside.

“It’s an isolation tank. It’s mostly used to help you through a restricted environmental stimulation therapy or REST. But basically, you just step inside the pod, float on saltwater and breathe. It’s dark and soundproof so claustrophobic donors and donees are not allowed in the tank.”

“I don’t understand.” I scratch my head. “So, you just float in there?”

“Yes, exactly. Some people sleep in the tank while others use it for meditation purposes. It’s really more about connecting to your inner self while you’re in a restricted environment.”

Connecting to your inner self. I have always thought of this as bull. I see a lot of advertisements around me about meditation classes and some other zen stuff and they all claim to help you connect with your inner self. I despise it. I absolutely do.

“Can I try it?”

“Of course! We have one free tank right now. I’ll have it prepared for you.” She says and walks out of her little area. She’s wearing flat rubber slippers and is still taller than me in those. “Follow me?” She says.

Her heels click against the wooden floor and as we take a loop around the spa, we pass by a lounge. It’s empty and I don’t really want to ask why. Much to my surprise, the loop comes to a few meters down a hallway.

“Shoes, please,” she says gesturing at a rack by the door. “Please change to one of our sterilized slip-on. Any other footwear is not allowed inside.”

I kick my shoes off almost immediately and crouch down to place it in a small box as I take the slippers inside it. “Your shoes will be sterilized while inside the box. Isn’t that cool?” She tells me and I awkwardly respond with a smile. She seems so excited about her first day on the job. After I slip in the rubber slippers, in a double door we go, leading us into a room of rooms.

There are about six rooms in total and each one of them is closed. The lights are dim in this room but there are lights on the floor to keep you from tripping. At the end of the hall is a single frosted glass door. It’s a bathroom. With showers, benches, a line of sinks, and a row of lockers.

“The third locker is yours,” she tells me. “There’s a robe inside that you can use. You must take a shower before going into the tank. While you do, we’ll have the pod prepared for you. You’re going to have to be in the tank so please don’t wear anything else under your robe.” She then bows at me before heading back out from where we came in. I think I saw a hint of pink on her cheeks as she left.

The third locker has a green light on top. As soon as I touch it with the tip of my fingers, something clicks inside and the light turns red. When I open the locker, there is a bathrobe and towel inside and small bottles labeled shampoo, conditioner, and shower gel. I take them all with me into one of the shower enclosures, also frosted.

It’s much more spacious inside than I thought. It’s not the typical shower where you just stand. There’s a space to hang the bathrobe and towel without getting them wet and a bench, too. I don’t know why there’s a bench inside but I have no reason to question it.

I take a shower, warm and quick. I have taken nice long baths before. Sometimes, I even stay too long under the water, my skin gets wrinkled. But not today. I do take my time but I enjoy every bit of it. I think it’s their shower gel. Even as I read the labels under the steamy water, my skin is soft and supple as I’ve never felt before. I didn’t know my skin could bounce back like models’ skins do in advertisements.

I rub myself dry with the towel and put on the robe. I take my clothes, towels, and leftover toiletries with me back to the locker and—

“Jesus!” I exclaimed as I almost slip while a man undoes his robe out in the open, exposing basically his whole self to me.

“Oh!” He exclaims. “God, I’m sorry! I didn’t know there’s someone else here. It’s usually just me.”

I didn’t even realize I covered my eyes until he told me to put my hand down.

“It’s okay. I’m dressed now,” he adds. “I mean, well, not completely dressed but I have coverings.”

I peek through my fingers and see him wrapped up securely in his robe.

“I’m really sorry,” he says. “I didn’t know.”

“It’s fine,” I tell him. I am not surprised I saw a dangling from his body. I have that too. I’m just surprised he has all the confidence to do all that in the open without any restrictions or inhibitions — until I came. “I was just shocked.”

“Well, me too,” he says as he goes back to tending to his lockers. “It’s usually just me in here at this time of day. Not a lot of people visit the spa at lunchtime.”

“It’s lunchtime?” I ask him as I walk to my locker, two slots away from his.

“It’s okay. They never run out of food here. I just prefer to eat later because everyone seems to eat on time here. The cafeteria is packed from noon to about a quarter past one. I don’t do well with crowds.”

I nod. I may have done something right without even knowing it. I attempt to fold my towel and hang it back on the rack where I got it from but the stranger stops me, as if in panic.

“It’s okay, they’ll get you new ones later,” he says. “You can toss used towels there.” He points at a bin and there are two towels inside. There isn’t any sign at all so I assumed it’s a trash bin.

I do as he says and puts my used towel in it.

“You can leave your clothes in your locker,” he continues. “They have it dry cleaned for you. It’s like magic. You leave dirty clothes in here and you come back and it’s fresh.” He’s raising his yellow shirt for me to see. “It smells so good.”

I dump everything in my locker and close it. “Do you always do this?”

“Maybe twice a week,” he says, still sniffing on his shirt.

“How long have you been here?” I ask him. It came almost naturally to me.

“Seven months,” he says.

I raise my eyebrow. “But the program lasts only six months.”

“Exactly,” he says.

I just stare at him as he gathers the rest of his clothes.

He smiles as he turns to me, closing his lockers gently. “Nice to meet you.” He extends a hand towards me and tilts his head, his wet hair still dripping to his robe and on the floor. “My name is Baekhyun. I’m a Donee.”

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