< Jonghyun’s POV >

I had always believed that I’m the happiest man in the world to have a girl I’ve been loving so much living under the same roof with me. We’ve been dating since our university day and been going through storm and rain together. As my family is living in other city, I can say that she isn’t just a girlfriend but also my family and the closest friend I have here in Seoul. For these 6 years and almost reaching to our 7years to be together, I’ve always been happy. I’ve been working so hard because I want to give her the best life. I’ve been looking forward to the day that I finally believed that I could propose her.

However, everything wasn’t going as I planned. My happiness couldn’t last forever. She has been changing and finally she asked me to break up. That day, she bravely walked out from my life without even a little hesitation.

-----/////-----

[ Throw back ] ~4 months ago~

“Y/N, I’ll go to pick you up from work today. I’m sorry that I’ve been so busy and couldn’t pick you up lately. Let’s go to have dinner at our favorite Italian restaurant after work!”

“Ah… today? I’m sorry, Jonghyun. I don’t think I can make it. I’m going to join a welcome party for new staff. You’ll be surprised if you know who he is. He is Minhyun, my childhood friend who I used to tell you before. He got hired by my company and we’re in the same team now. I’m so happy. Finally, I can see someone I’ve been missing so much.”

She excitedly told me. I could see happiness on his face but I felt upset somehow when she said she’s happy to finally be able to see someone she has missed so much.

I’ve never met that man who named “Minhyun” but Y/N likes mentioning about him to me so much since our university day. I’ve never told her but sometimes I feel so bored and uncomfortable when it comes to our serious moment and she still has to mention about him. Now they’re working together. I don’t want to think too much but I can’t help not to worry.

-----

One day, my boss called me to meet. He offered me a new higher position but I’ve to move to New York for 2 years. I rejected it right away because I really can’t live a day without my girlfriend. I decided not to tell her about this because I didn’t want her to feel sorry for being the reason that I would reject this rare opportunity. I didn’t feel regret but I felt sad to lose the chance. I wish I could tell her and got comforted but I really shouldn’t say it.

-----

Lately, she was busy talking with that close friend a lot. I knew he’s new to Seoul but she was just giving time to that man too much and didn’t notice my sadness at all.

“Yes sure, I’ll guide you around here. You don’t have to worry much. Contact me anytime if you have anything. Please don’t hesitate! I’ve plenty time for you, Minhyunnie.”

Y/N was happily talking on phone with that guy and it was almost mid-night now. Tonight, I couldn’t fall asleep as I felt so sad and stressed about work. Maybe just a kiss or cheerful word from her would help me but she didn’t pay attention to me at all. Finally, I decided to approach her first. I slowly wrapped my hand over her waist and landed my noses on her shoulder then rolled up to her neck, hoping she would pay attention to me and gave a satisfied response to me back. But she didn’t react anything at all. She was still on her phone, ignoring my purpose. I didn’t want to give up just yet so I held her tighter while my noses were rolling on her cheek. Then I finally reached her lips but she suddenly pushed my chest to make a space from me.

“Jonghyun-ah, I’m still on phone. Please wait a little bit!” she denied me and looked so worried if the guy she was talking to would hear us. She left the room immediately, left me confused and upset. I just wanted to be comforted by her. She has never ignored me like this before but since that guy came into her life again, she started changing. That was the first time I felt so upset with her.

-----

NEXT DAY

“Y/N, can you tie for me? Having you tie for me, I’m gonna have a good luck at work today.”

I shouted for her from the room. I wanted to cheer our morning by some sweet moments as well as to cheer myself from the last night disappointment.

“I’m sorry, Jonghyun-ah! I’m busy with cooking. Please do it by yourself today!”

She replied from the kitchen. I knew she was busy with her cooking but normally she would just leave everything and comes to me if I ask for her. I tried not to think too much and acted to her as normal. I finished dressing up my work suit then went out for breakfast.

“I’m sorry for not going to tie for you. I’m in rush today and I needed to finish cooking for you fast. I have to dress up and go now. Please have breakfast by yourself!” -Y/N-

“In rush, why? Is there any urgent work? You’re not going to eat with me?” I worriedly asked.

“It’s Minhyun. He has to do presentation in meeting today but he’s not ready yet so I want to go to work early to help him to practice. Don’t worry about me!”

She shocked me in the early morning after heard that her rush was all for that man. She quickly rushed to room and dressed up then left without even said “have a nice day at work” to me. I was upset and a bit pissed off. It looked like he’s so important to her that she has to care everything for him.

-----

This whole month, I started having a lot of stress and pressure at work. After I rejected the offer, my boss seemed to be very upset with me and he started putting a lot of pressure to me. There were a lot of work to do and it really needed me to do overtime work but I didn’t want to be late at home anymore. I’ve been late a lot already recently. I didn’t want to miss picking up her at work and having dinner with her anymore so I didn’t do overtime work.

One evening, I called her telling her I would go to pick her up from work and cook dinner at home together but she quickly rejected me. She said it’s Minhyun’s birthday and needed to celebrate it with him. I was very upset to hear like why does it have to be that Minhyun again? Anyway, I tried to understand her and came back home first.

After joining the birthday party, she came back home a bit late. I was waiting for her at living room and got so shocked to see she was heavily drunk for the first time. She couldn’t even walk properly.

“Y/N, why are you so drunk like this? You’re a weak drinker. You shouldn’t have drunk this much.”

I quickly went to her, showing her how I was worried and mad to see her in this state for the first time.

“I’m sorry, Jonghyun. I was too excited to be able to celebrate my best friend’s birthday with him after a long time. Please don’t mind me!” she replied with very drunken behavior.

I carried her to bed and helped to wash her body. She was so drunk and completely lost her consciousness. She slept soundly. I couldn’t sleep as I was worried about her condition and at the same time I was so upset. I took her phone to check. Her call histories were full of that guy’s name as well as her SNS chat. She even added him as her favorite contact. I frowned with doubt. This disturbed my trust on her a lot.

“What kind of best friend is this? Are they really just friend?” this was the question I kept asking myself for full night.

-----

NEXT DAY

It’s weekend so we didn’t have to go to work. Y/N was still sleeping due to her drunkenness last night. I woke up first to cook for her.

A moment later she woke up and walked to me at the kitchen with guilty facial expression.

“Jonghyun! I’m sorry. Maybe I was too drunk last night. Did I disturb your sleep? I know you’ve been busy at work. I shouldn’t have drunk too much and made you take care of me at late night like that. I’m really sorry.” she worriedly apologized as she seemed to remember how drunk she was last night.

“It’s fine. We’re sweetheart. I’ve to take care of you like that. I was just shocked to see you drunken like that for the first time. Please don’t drink too much next time because you’re a weak drinker. How are you feeling now?” I tried to hold my upset because my worries for her was bigger than anything else.

“I’m fine now. Let’s me help you prepare for the breakfast!” -Y/N-

…..

We spent a full day at home. She was on her phone talking with somebody again, maybe there was nobody besides that Minhyun. It was like 3hours straight on the phone already but she hasn’t finished it yet. I was waiting for her to end the call soon as I wanted to ask her out but she didn’t look like she would finish it soon so I decided to have a drive all by myself. I was so stressed that day. I left home but she didn’t even bother to ask where I was going.

I spent 3 hours on drive without destination then I went to a pub to have a drink. I was a little bit drunk. I went back home and Y/N already fell asleep. That night I really needed her as my stress was too much to handle. I wanted her body to comfort me. So I hugged and kissed her and it made her awake. She pushed me from her immediately.

“Jonghyun! Stop it! Don’t do this when you’re drunk. Please go to take shower and sleep!” she looked so pissed off and mad.

“I… Y/N, I really need you tonight. I know you don’t like it when I drink but I’m not drunk. Please don’t refuse me! I really need you.” I tried to express how much I needed her by approaching her again. I held her shoulders and tried to attack her lips again.

“Kim Jonghyun, stop it! I hate it when you’re drunk. I used to tell you right that I don’t want to make love with you when you’re drunk. You really need to stop it. Don’t make me angry!” she volume up her voice to me and looked madder. I felt guilty so I released my hands from holding her shoulders.

“I’m sorry. I’ll go to take shower. Please go back to sleep! I’m sorry to wake you up at this hour.” I apologized to her then went to take shower. She looked really pissed off with me. It scared me a little, to be honest. I didn’t really understand why she would react that mad to me. I was hurt, I was upset. I spent quite long time crying in the shower.

-----

NEXT DAY

Next day, I woke up with a heavy headache. It wasn’t because of my drunkenness. It was because I was crying too much last night. I opened my eyes and she was already out of bed. A moment later, she left the shower.

“You woke up now? Good-morning, Jonghyun! How are you feeling now?” she sat on the bed next to me and worriedly touched my forehead.

“I guess I’m fine. I’m sorry to make you get mad last night. It won’t happen again.” I sadly apologized again. I still felt guilty to do what she hates. She gave me a smile and patted my face then gave me a quick kiss on my lips. I couldn’t control my feeling. She has just finished the bath and came out with just a towel on her body and especially cutely treated me like this, I didn’t hesitate to lay her on the bed and kissed her. I didn’t know if it was what she really wanted too or just didn’t want to upset me again but she didn’t refuse. We kissed and hugged like we have always done every time. I almost forgot all the stress and upset I’ve been containing lately. She was treating me on bed like she has always done.

“We rarely do this in the morning, right? This is so exciting me. Let’s spend the whole morning on bed together!” I paused my kiss on her a second just to express how excited I was feeling right now but she suddenly changed her facial expression. I frowned.

“Hmm… I’m afraid we can’t. I actually got a hang out with Minhyun today. Look, he’s new to Seoul so I want to guide him around. Let’s finish it quick because it’s almost time to go!” she upset me again. I was really pissed off and almost exploded my anger to her. I didn’t really expect it.

“Y/N, do you even feel like doing this with me right now? Do you agree to make love with me now because you need to leave me alone for the whole day? What are you thinking?” I couldn’t hold my anger. I shouted at her.

“What are you even saying? Can’t I just spend some times with my friend? You’re too narrow hearted. He is a good friend of me and needs help so I can’t ignore him. Please understand!” she shouted at me back.

“Fine! I got it now. You can go! No need to waste time with me.” I didn’t want to argue anymore so I left to bathroom. When I finished bathing, she already left.

I spent a full day all by myself at home, being stressed, upset and angry. But I still kept telling myself that they’re just friends and she helps him because he really needed it. I also felt regret to shout at her so I decided to say sorry when she’s back.

Finally, she came back. I was waiting for her at living room. I was scared to talk with her at first as I was afraid if she’s still angry with me.

“I’m home. Have you eaten already? Why do you look so unwell? Are you sick?” she rushed to me and touched my forehead.

“I’m fine, baby. I just feel regret to shout at you this morning. I was a bit childish. Can you forgive me?” I tried to express my apology. She patted my face and gave me a soft smile, looked like she already forgot about it.

“It’s fine. I was a bit tough to you this morning too. Please forgive me!” she said then hugged me. I hugged her back. We finally made up and I felt so relieved. For these 6 years, I’ve been trying myself not to upset or make her angry because I love her so much.

-----

From that day, I tried to be open minded. Maybe only one month she would stop needing to care for him and spend time with him anymore. However, the more I tried to give her freedom the more obvious she was. She started talking on phone at night a lot and mostly she would talk inside living room like she didn’t want me to know what she was talking about. Until one day I couldn’t clam myself anymore. I went to her inside the living room while she was still talking on phone.

“Y/N, are you going to spend time with him all day long? Day time you work with him and night time you keep talking on phone with him. How about me? Aren’t you going to care about me anymore?” I said to her loudly as I wanted that guy could hear too. She looked shocked and quickly ended the call.

“Jonghyun, what happened? Why are you like this? you’re not this narrow hearted before. We’re talking about work? Are you jealous? Don’t be jealous without proper reason like this! Fine! I’ve ended the call. Let’s go to bed!” she said then grabbed my hand to enter our bedroom back. I remained silent. Maybe I was doubting too much. I felt guilty again. I should have held my anger.

“Please don’t be jealous! He’s just my friend. We only talked about work earlier. He has a lot of new things to learn. Please understand! I’m sorry if I made you upset.” she noticed my silence so she patted my back and showed her worries for me.

“Can we make love tonight? You’ve refused me very often lately. I really miss it.” I tried to ask her again.

“Okay! But it’s my ovulate date so you have to use protection.”

I went to find it then realized I already ran out of it.

“Y/N, I already ran out of it. Can we just make love without it once?”

“No, you know it’s my ovulate date. If you don’t have it then let’s sleep!”

“But I…”

“No but, Jonghyun-ah, I can be pregnant. We’ve not married yet. Don’t be careless! Let’s sleep! We have work tomorrow.”

“Fine!”

When it came to her ovulate date, she was always careful. She never allowed me to make love with her without wearing protection but the problem is I can see how she looked so worried more than any other time.

-----

New week came. She refused to let me take and pick up her at work again. She said she was going to her friend’s house to cook him his favorite food. She said it has been a while already and he missed her cooked food. I was shocked and unhappy at first but again I didn’t want to make her upset so I agreed to let her go.

That night, I felt really uncomfortable. I couldn’t stop thinking what they’d do alone at home. I kept praying that she would come back home soon.

She came back home at 10PM.

“Jonghyun, aren’t you sleeping yet? Are you waiting for me?”

“Yes, I’m worried about you.”

“Stupid boy, I’m not a kid anymore. Let’s go to our bedroom!”

We went to our bedroom.

Suddenly her phone rang and it was that guy.

“Hello, Minhyunnie! Yes I’ve just arrived. Oh I forgot my jacket at your place? Ah I’m so clumsy. Please take it for me at company. I’m gonna take bath and sleep now. Good-night!”

She was talking on phone with that guy happily again and her conversation got me shocked. She didn’t say anything to me. She went straight to bathroom. I doubted and hurt alone. I went to take out her phone from her bag and accidentally dropped out something that got me shocked. It was . I was almost crazy like why she had it. I clenched my fist with anger. I waited for her to come out from bathroom impatiently.

“Jonghyun, I thought you were sleeping already.”

She came out with her bathrobe and was wiping her wet hair with a small towel. I stood up and showed the to her.

“Tell me, why do you have this? What the hell were you doing at your friend’s house, Y/N?” I angrily shouted at her.

“What are you saying, Jonghyun? I bought it for you. You said you ran out of it last night. What are you thinking I was doing at Minhyun’s house?”

“Really? But you even forgot your jacket at his place. Are you really sure that you’ve not done anything with him?”

“Kim Jonghyun, you’re too much. I really bought it for you. You can see it’s still full. I’ve not used it. You stupid boy, you’re hurting me now. We’ve been dating for 6years. How could you not trust me?” she volume up her voice as he eyes turning red, likely to drop the tears soon. I checked the and it was really full. I felt guilty. I realized I was too moody again.

“I’m sorry. I was …..”

“It’s enough. Let’s sleep! I’m sleepy now.”

She looked so upset with me. She finished the argument by asking to sleep. I felt really bad for myself.

“I’m sorry. I love you, baby!”

She was sleeping by turning her back to me. I laid next to her, kissing on her right shoulder, covered blanket for her then slept hugging her.

-----

From that day, I decided to stop judging her too fast and without evidences. I decided to keep my doubt inside my heart and tried my best to let her do what she wanted. I just hoped everything would turn to be normal after a while.

-----

After one month that that guy came to work in Seoul, my childhood friend Jennie who is a daughter of my company’s chairman came to train at the company for 3months. Her father asked me to take care of her during her training period. As she is my good friend, I’m glad to accept the order. It’s really a good feeling after not seeing your childhood friend for a long time. I spent most of the time with her, like teaching the work, guiding her around Seoul, taking her for meal and sending her home. I finally understood that it must be the feeling that Y/N had for her good friend, Minhyun too. But the difference was I didn’t tell her about Jennie and how I was spending time with her because I didn’t want my girlfriend to get jealous with me like I used to do for her and Minhyun.

I started tying up with work even more and couldn’t escape from doing overtime work. Sometimes I had to work till late night and sometimes I had to have dinner with close partners. I confessed I didn’t have time much for Y/N lately. I had to leave in the early morning to go to pick Jennie as she didn’t have driving license in South Korea and refused to have a driver. I thought it was just 3 months so I would do it for her. We really spent time a lot and as we have childhood bond, we sometimes acted really close even in public. People didn’t know us may think we’re a couple.

One morning, I was attacked by a shock news. Some reporters stalked us and took some photos of us together then they made an article, saying we’re dating. I was so pissed off that day. All staffs, my friends and just everybody asked me about that news if it’s true whenever I met them. It made me bored to get the same question and needed to give the same explanation that it wasn’t true. Jennie got the same trouble as her American boyfriend called her and they argued because of that news. I was so tired of receiving the phone call that day but there was one person didn’t even bother to send me a message. Y/N didn’t call nor message me. To be honest, I couldn’t help not to get upset. At least she should be jealous and called me once she heard about the news. I was sure she knew about it. Yet she didn’t react anything at all.

That night I went to drink and came home very late. She was waiting for me and finally asked me about that news but I thought it was just too late. She should have reacted faster, like if she loves me, she should insist to know since the morning.

Due to my upset and stress, I was a bit rough to her. I coldly ignored her. When she kept talking a lot, I shouted at her then I left to bathroom. I spent like one hour in the bathroom to cry out my pain and when I came out, she already slept so I wasn’t able to explain anything to her.

-----

NEXT DAY

Normally, I would give her a kiss on forehead in the morning but since I was rejected to make love with her for like one month already, I dared not to have any skin ship with her that much. I was afraid I would make her more uncomfortable. I went to toilet. When I left toilet, I saw her was holding my phone. Someone was calling me. I knew it was Jennie and I was afraid Y/N felt doubt with me so I took the phone from her and went to talk in living room.

I was in rush that morning because Jennie needed to go to check up at hospital. So I didn’t have time to explain to Y/N about the news again. I left without having breakfast with her. My girlfriend is very open-hearted girl so I was sure she didn’t mind it.

-----

Day by day, I became busier so I didn’t make time to explain about that news to Y/N at all. I was so busy with my own work and needed to teach Jennie. Jennie was very new to this business world so I had to teach her a lot. I had to spend even the time I was at home talking and chatting with her. Actually, 3 months wasn’t enough. She had to go back to America and took care of her father’s business there so I decided to try my best to teach her as much as I could.

I had shared my relationship to Jennie also told her about how our love life became uncomfortable after that guy came to her life again. Jennie told that I should ask her to get married before everything went worse than this. So I decided to ask her to get married on her upcoming birthday.

From that day, I kept talking with Jennie about how I should propose and how I should arrange it. Jennie was really helpful and gave me many good ideas. She told me to make it as surprised proposal so I followed her.

-----

One weekend, Y/N and I went on shopping at a mall. I made her walk pass wedding cloth corner with me and waited to see her reaction. I was really happy when she looked so excited and happy to see those wedding dresses. But due to my plan to make her surprised, I tried to ignore her excitement. I quickly dragged her to leave from there and headed back to parking lot. I was chatting with Jennie that time and told her about my girlfriend’s reaction. Jennie said she obviously wanted to get married. That time I wanted to buy the dress that my girlfriend got excited to see for her. I was afraid that it was sold out if I was late so I lied to her that I got an urgent work to do and couldn’t send her back home. I left her to go home all by herself. To be honest, I was so sorry that time. She was full of plastic bags in her hands but I decided to apologize to her after I succeed my plan to propose her. I went inside the mall again and bought the dress.

-----

I knew our s*x life was a bit rough. I was like we have been living together for almost 2 years and I was going to propose her soon so I didn’t want us to prevent from having baby anymore. But she never lets me touch her without using protection so some nights I felt so upset and just turned back to her for whole night to hide my upset from her.

“Please understand, Jonghyun! Though it’s not my ovulate date, we really can’t do it without protection. What if I’m pregnant? I don’t want a baby now. I mean we’re not a married couple yet.”

“Fine! I won’t do it. Just sleep!”

-----

When her birthday was coming, I was planning my proposal perfectly. My plan was to make her upset with me for forgetting her birthday and acted like I didn’t care about it and when she came back dorm at night, I would surprise her a birthday celebration along with proposal. I also bought a ring to propose her.

It was a night before her birthday, she asked if I would spend time with her on her birthday for the whole day like every year or not but I pretended to forget and lied that I didn’t ask for permission at work. She looked so upset and she was sobbing for the whole night. I felt so bad to see my beloved girl in pain like this but I tried to endure.

-----

NEXT DAY

Finally, her birthday came. I pretended to go to work and ignored not even to say happy birthday to her. I was trying to make her upset so when I revealed the truth, she would be so surprised. I left home and went to buy things to decorate for her birthday also her favorite flavored cake. I was very excited that day as finally tonight I was going to propose her and we would get married soon.

Unfortunately, everything wasn’t going as plan. She came home very late and her phone couldn’t be contacted. I was so pissed off and my feeling was already turning blue when it was over 12AM already.

When she arrived so late and especially with drunkenness like that, my anger was exploded immediately.

“Where have you gone and you know what time is it now?”

“I was drinking with my friend. The cake? Were you waiting for me? Jonghyun, I didn’t know you were waiting for me. I thought you’re tied up with your work till late night like every day so…..”

“Yes I was waiting for you but you were having fun with your close friend. It’s over 12AM now and not your birthday anymore so no need to celebrate.” I said then furiously threw away the cake.

“Jonghyun, I’m sorry. If I had known you were waiting, I would come back home early.” she burst out crying.

“I don’t need your excuse. I’ve had enough. Now come here!”

 As my anger and doubt with her had raised so high, I grabbed her hand violently to go to our bedroom.

“Jonghyun, let go of me! It’s hurt.”

I threw her to the bed.

“Jonghyun-ah, what are you trying to do?” she worriedly asked.

“I’m going to do like what we have been doing for years. Why do you look so worried? Am I not allowed to make love with you anymore?”

After shouting at her, I roughly kissed her lips but she kept escaping and pushing me.

“Why? Why are you fighting? I can’t sleep with you anymore, right?”

“No, it’s just we should talk first and I’m a bit drunk. I’m not feeling well. I don’t feel like doing this tonight. I’m sorry.” she kept finding excuse and it really hurt me so bad.

“Have you just slept with someone else before come here already? That’s why you’re denying me.”

I was already teary with a great disappointment.

“Please don’t judge me like that! It’s fine if you want to do this with me tonight. I’m not denying anymore.”

She finally stopped fighting and returned the kiss and hug to me. Maybe she was afraid I thought she was really seeing someone else???

This time I decided to test her. I wanted to know how she would react if I didn’t use protection with her.

“Jonghyun, aren’t you going to use the protection? I can be pregnant, Jonghyun. It’s my ovulation date. Please use it!”

As expected, she was so worried about being pregnant with me. I tried to ignore and forced her to have the first night without protection with me.

“Jonghyun-ah, please… Jonghyun….”

She kept crying and begging me. I actually felt so hurt, looked like she really hated to have a baby with me.

Spending her special day until late night with that guy, coming back home late and being drunk so bad and refusing to make love with me again and again….. all of these made me believe that my doubt was turning to be true.

-----

NEXT DAY

I woke up and felt guilty to have forced her last night. I was a bit rough and sensitive on her. But what got me shocked the most was she was packing her suitcase.

“What are you doing? Why are you packing your clothes?”

“I want to stay away from you for a while. There have been many things happened between us lately so I want sometimes to think.” she replied with her eyes were full of tears.

“Think? Do you want to break up with me? Were you angry because I forced you to sleep with me last night? We’ve been doing like this for years already, why can’t I do it with you anymore?” I was shocked. I couldn’t hold my madness. I shouted at her again. I held her shoulders tight, asking her.

“Let me go for a few days! I really need time. I’m so complicated right now. Let’s talk again when I come back with a better feeling.” she begged me while her tears kept falling. I felt so complicated but I also understood that I was a bit too much to her late night so I released her. I was lost so I stood still and remained silent. She grabbed her suitcase then left. I couldn’t control my tears. I kept bawling for hours after she left. I knew I was too much but she shouldn’t have left me like this.

-----

Since she left, I was living like in hell. I didn’t know if she would come back after that short time she said. I drank every day and I even asked permission from work. I found out she left to her hometown, Busan and that guy also went there. I almost went crazy to hear. That time, it was really obvious that they’re in relationship and she left me for that guy.

It has been one week. I didn’t go to work. I didn’t eat. I didn’t go out. I locked myself in my room drinking. One night, Jennie was worried about me as I messaged her, I wanted to die. She came to my dorm and consoled me. She told me to wait until Y/N came back and had a clear talk with her before judging she was in relationship. I decided to follow Jennie.

The next day, I found out Y/N already came back to Seoul but she didn’t come back home. I started stalking her and I found out she was staying in that guy’s place. They came to work together and went back home together. They looked so happy to be together and like a couple. That moment, I lost all trust on her. I didn’t disturb her. I didn’t enter to ask her right away as I was so afraid to hear the answer I was doubting.

-----

After a few days, I got a call from her to meet at a Café. I was feeling unwell since the way she was talking on phone with me. I was curious what kind the appointment is it. I felt scared rather than being happy to meet her after a while.

-----

[ Inside a Café ]

I arrived at our appointment place first. I was impatiently waiting for her. I was planning to say sorry and asked her to make-up. I still thought I had a chance as we’ve been in relationship for years already. However, my hope was lost again. When she arrived, I almost got heart-attack. That guy, Minhyun came with her. They were heading to me with very firm facial expression. My tension and fear were raising up. We became so awkward with each other and remained silent for a while until I started the conversation first.

“I know you’ve come back from Busan for a few days already but why don’t you come back home?”

“Home? There isn’t my home anymore. By the way, I called you today because I want to ask you to break up. Let’s break up! You should know the reason already so I don’t have to say it anymore! Kim Jonghyun, thanks for almost 7 years relationship! You’ve taught me a lot so far. Thank you so much!”

She straightforwardly asked for a break-up. I was too shocked that I didn’t even know what I should react or which word I should say especially when she said I should know the reason already. So they’ve been dating behind my back???

“You should understand more than anybody else. Well, I think I’ve made everything clear now. I gotta go! I wish you all the best. Let’s not see each other anymore! Even we run into each other by chance, let’s pretend not to know each other! Good-bye, the boy that I used to love!”

She bravely said all those words out with even a little hesitation. She finished her word then stood up intending to leave. She didn’t wait for my reply. I wanted to ask to have a private talk with her but that guy suddenly held her and they walked to leave the Café. I felt lost. I was powerless and I really didn’t know what to do with this. She didn’t even wait to hear if I agreed to break up or not. She was just impatient to finish with me and started with new relationship with that guy freely.

I kept facing down silently inside the Café as my tears started rolling down. I knew I’m a man and I shouldn’t cry in public but breaking up with the love of my life like this, I really couldn’t help not to cry. After a while, I could collect my power back a little. I decided to run after her and asked for a private talk. I quickly ran out from the Café and was intending to follow her. But when I saw they were walking, holding each other and she didn’t bother to turn back, I decided to give up. I let her go.

“Y/N, you’re not even turning back to have a look at me? you chose him and left me so he must be important and special for you. I wish you would be happier with him than being with me. Thanks for these 6 years! Good-bye, my beloved one!”

----- End of Jonghyun’s POV -----