cloud collapse
telescope: seeing the edge of a galaxy through an upside-down lens
telescope: seeing the edge of a galaxy through an upside-down lens
one city, divided. two people in love.
∞
Yongsun: If you’d asked me when I was four what the sun and the stars looked like, I would’ve stared at you as if you were some strange other-worldly creature, wondering why you’d ask such a silly question. Then I would’ve pointed at the flickering ceiling light above the kitchen; that was my sun and stars, that was the light in my life for a very long time.
But that all changed when I went above and glimpsed a new world and met someone who would become my world. But then nothing happens at the proper time; things are either too early or too late. And so I watched my world flash and break into pieces. And then everything went dark.
Moonbyul: I can hear the sound of my heart opening and closing, like a machine. It doesn’t beat anymore, I reckon it stopped doing that a long time ago. And every time I close my eyes, I see a video of a woman — a memory — playing. It’s like it’s trying to tell me something.
So, with a heavy heart, I walk through my days with little idea of who I am or where I am. It’s like I’m on some foreign planet with somebody else’s memories playing in my head. And the only thing I know with certainty is that I’m not where I’m supposed to be. This isn’t my world, my universe, my galaxy…
.
.
.
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the city state of Lutetia is a nasty place. the city state of Lutetia is a beautiful place. it all depends on who you ask.
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Yongsun: Don’t ask me who I am, you don’t deserve to know me personally. I’ve been through hell and back, and I don’t need you sitting on my back looking down at me with your scrutinising eyes as I fight for the survival of my world. I do what I must to survive. Don’t you dare judge me.
Moonbyul: I know my name is Moon Byulyi. And I mustn’t ever forget it.
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Kim Yongsun is four years old when her world suddenly goes dark. the electricity to the apartment building that her family lives in has been cut. she grips her mother’s hand out of fear and asks if the sky is falling down.
«everything’ll be fine, Yongsun, you’ll see.» Yongsun’s mother coos while she gently her daughter’s hair.
Yongsun sits on the couch with her mother while her father and Yonghee (Yongsun’s older sister) try to get the standby generator to work. Yongsun’s father is a robust man with greying hair and a warm smile. Yonghee is a small child with a passion for fixing things and has already proven herself quite handy with a screwdriver and wrench.
after two hours of sitting in complete darkness, the kitchen light turns on, and Yongsun looks up at the small lightbulb wondering if the stars in the sky flicker the same way the kitchen lightbulb does.
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Moon Byulyi is born in a pristine white hospital room surrounded by bright, blinding light and shiny medical equipments. a year later, Moon Seulgi is born. the two Moon siblings grow up together on the top floor of a high-rise apartment that overlooks Lutetia and all its corporate buildings with shimmering neon logos.
their parents are very busy and influential; Moonbyul’s father is an acclaimed architect, Moonbyul’s mother is the secretary of a successful corporation called SEQUENCE, which specialises in enhancing the biological human body. on those rare occasions when Moonbyul and Seulgi’s parents are home, Moonbyul and Seulgi compete for their parents’ attention, showing off their latest accomplishments and achievements from school.
Seulgi shows off her scientific awards. Moonbyul shows off her sport trophies.
by the time that Moonbyul and Seulgi are ten and nine years old, their parents realise that their children are ‘highly gifted’, and thus decide to enrol them in the most prestigious and expensive school in Lutetia, the Academy.
Seulgi has a sharp mind and fits in perfectly at the Academy, winning award after award. Moonbyul, on the other hand, sticks out like a sore thumb. she doesn’t know what she wants in life and finds the Academy intimidating and mind-numbingly scary. she dreads all her classes, she fears her lecturers and tutors. Moonbyul feels so dismayed about her education that she nearly flings herself from the roof of the Academy when she is fourteen.
Moonbyul peers over the edge, looking down at a haze of neon. scared, she takes a step back. then another and another, until all the city lights disappear behind the edge of the railing.
she looks up at the sky, seeing nothing but a dark tapestry that stretches on for miles and miles — it’s endless, almost infinite. Moonbyul closes her eyes and lets out a relieved sigh.
.
here’s the special thing about the city state of Lutetia: it is a physically divided city — there is an above and a below.
a concrete pavement separates the wealthy, who live above, from the less fortunate, who live below; a place ridden with crime and poverty.
above is a place for people like Moon Byulyi. below is a place for people like Kim Yongsun.
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Yonghee tries to leave home when she is sixteen years old because she believes her family will be better off without her.
«where are you going?» Yongsun, who is only ten years old, asks as she tiredly rubs her eyes.
Yonghee stops in her tracks by the doorway and slowly turns around. she drops her shoulder bag when she sees Yongsun standing in the narrow hallway, using an old oversized t-shirt as a nightgown. Yonghee opens but then quickly shuts it and shakes her head.
she realises that, whatever she may say, Yongsun will not understand or comprehend the complexity and utter desperation of the situation. Yonghee looks down at the ground, full of shame. her hands ball into fists, she bites down on her tongue as she struggles to walk away — away from family, away from home.
Yonghee takes a shuddering breath and looks at the door with hope, desperately clinging to the idea that if she manages to escape this place and climb through the cracks to the lavish city looming above, then she will have a better chance at life.
standing at the end of the hallway, Yongsun yawns and rubs her eyes again. she thinks Yonghee looks terribly sad, so she tells her to hurry back from whatever escapade she is going on.
Yonghee gasps, placing a shaking hand over as she tries to fight back the tears. what she wants to say is come with me, instead she whispers I’m sorry.
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Moonbyul leaves the Academy just before she turns eighteen.
«why must you torment us so!» her father yells as he paces back and forth in their high-rise apartment, pulling at his jet black hair.
«we pay for your education and you show us your gratitude by throwing it all away!» his voice is like venom; Moonbyul can feel it breaking through her skin and infecting her blood.
Moonbyul looks down at the ground, avoiding eye contact with her father, all the while she can feel her mother’s prying eyes on her, slowly peeling away all her insecurities and secrets.
Moonbyul feels stark and vulnerable, and shivers under her parents’ glare. she lowers her gaze as she runs a hand through her hair, wanting to disappear. when she looks up at her mother, seeking some comfort, she receives nothing but a look full of pity.
«do you detest us?» her father asks, voice brittle and on the verge of breaking. Moonbyul remains silent. out of sheer disgust, her father storms out of the apartment. her mother stays behind, but says nothing.
Moonbyul has always thought of her mother as a ghost: she had never truly been around while Moonbyul was growing up, but those rare embraces and fleeting forehead kisses during her adolescence were enough for Moonbyul to want her mother’s approval and acceptance.
so whenever Moonbyul finds herself struggling to keep up with an ever-changing reality, memories of her mother come back to haunt her and take her to an empty childhood.
with graceful steps, Moonbyul’s mother goes towards Moonbyul, and when she’s close enough, she places a hand on her daughter’s shoulder. with a whisper, she tells Moonbyul not to fret: her future is still secure and she can work for SEQUENCE as a security guard.
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Yongsun waits and waits and waits and waits.
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years pass and Yongsun wishes time would just stand still.
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her father is getting older and his body is weakening. her mother is slowly dying from a wicked disease.
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when Yongsun is sixteen years old, she stops waiting and becomes the breadwinner.
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her father is in denial about Yonghee leaving while her mother is in pain at the loss of a child. Yongsun tries her best to keep the family together; desperately trying to pay off her parents’ debts, providing for them, caring for them, paying rent and finding work wherever she can, all of which is not easy when you’re only a teenager.
she works part-time at her father’s car repair shop and is fascinated by the different cars that are towed in: they’re old, outdated models but certainly not out of fashion, it seems. when the cars leave the garage, they’re sleek, intimidating, eye-catching, and they always let out a furious rumble when the engine revs, shaking Yongsun’s bones to her core.
Yongsun also works part-time at a small shop that sells outdated electronics. she is in charge of rebooting old computer system
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