(Rosé POV)

“CHONGAH!” I heard Lisa yell for me in her air raid siren of a voice, making me reluctantly drag myself out of bed. “Why is Jennie unnie making the tiest pancakes known to humankind?” she demanded when I opened my bedroom door to find her and Jisoo standing there, both with their arms crossed and their sunglasses on, like a couple of federal agents, if federal agents ever did investigations in their jammies.

“What?” I asked confusedly, although it came out as more of a squeak.

“It’s not the pancakes that are ty. She’s bodyrolling in the kitchen,” Jisoo clarified.

“What?” I squeaked again, more confused than ever.

“Yeah, it’s like Coyote Ugly out there, but with breakfast food,” Lisa added.

“Why are you asking me about this?” I said, feigning ignorance and grimacing uncomfortably.

“Didn’t she stay in your room last night?” Jisoo replied.

I wasn’t sure what to tell them. I didn’t really know how much of my earlier conversation with Jennie I was comfortable sharing with anyone. Not that Jisoo or Lisa were just anyone, but I was still personally reeling from the recent turn of events. It didn’t help that Jennie and I didn’t get any sleep from, um... talking, so everything still felt like a blur to me.


(Flashback)

“ everything, Roseanne. I’m not letting you go,” Jennie snarled, with my wrist gripped tightly in her hand.

I had to admit it felt really good hearing my name roll off of her tongue like that, especially considering where her tongue had been just minutes before, but I had to be rational. I had to think clearly for the both of us, since Jennie had apparently lost her marbles, and didn’t care if we both got chased out of town by a homophobic, pitchfork-wielding mob. But it was so hard to be rational with Jennie’s fiery eyes boring holes into my soul, and my knees were already weak from the seismic she had just given me. It was almost impossible to think straight, when the love of my gay life was glaring defiantly at me, ready to punch out anyone who would stand in the way of our love. I was almost afraid that anyone included me.

“Jen, c’mon...” I said weakly, trying to free my arm from her death grip. “You were right all along, okay? No good can come of us continuing down this road.”

“I was scared, and I’m sorry I screwed this whole thing up, but I’m not scared anymore, Rosie,” she insisted.

“Oh, well, how nice for you that you’re not scared anymore,” I snapped, my temper suddenly flaring. “Like the minute you’re ready for a relationship, the universe will just magically fix all our problems? We’re still in the same situation we’ve always been in. I mean, nothing has changed. What happens when hits the fan, and so many people get screwed over because of us? What about Lisa who moved all the way from Thailand, leaving her mom and dad and her home? Or Jisoo unnie, who’s much too lazy to start a new career? What about our manager unnies and oppas, and our stylists, the band, and everyone else? What about your mom and dad, and my family? Will they be okay with us being gay together? This isn’t just about us, Jennie! This affects so many other people that we care about.”

Jennie was quiet for a while, looking like she was considering the weight of my words. She looked almost defeated, when she suddenly yelled out, “Airplane oxygen mask!”

“What? Are you having a ?”

“No! What’s that thing that they say on flights when they’re outlining safety procedures? You’re supposed to secure your own oxygen mask before you can help anyone else with their mask.”

“Jen... we’re not on a plane...”

“I know that! I mean, your own needs are important too. You keep thinking of everyone else, but Rosie, we’re not hurting anyone. We’re not trying to harm anyone. I just want to be with you. I want to be happy. I want you to be happy. And no, I’m not blind to the possible consequences, but... I feel my happiness and yours are important considerations too.”

“Okay, well, let’s talk about our happiness. I don’t want to destroy my career, and I’m pretty sure you don’t want to flush all your hard work down the drain either.”

“No, of course not. I only want the best things for both of us. But I’m not asking you to make a public service announcement that you’re sleeping with me. I’m prepared to keep this lowkey for as long as we need it to be lowkey. I don’t need the world to know you’re mine. I just need to know it, and I need you to know it,” Jennie said, holding her warm hand to my cheek, making me pliable to her will, so I was like putty or something out of her ridiculous slime collection. “I love you so much, Rosie.”

“Stop saying that,” I said through grit teeth. “You think that makes my life easier? You think that makes me happy? What about our friendship, Jen? You... Jesus, you mean so much to me, and I can’t lose you. I can’t risk that. I need you so badly in my life.”

“The last thing I want is to complicate either of our lives. But here’s the thing: it already is complicated. I’m in love with you, that’s not hypothetical, it’s a fact, and I have to deal with it. I’m pretty sure you have some sort of feelings for me because you just le