9/09/19

We had PE today. I wanted to play something else, but we ended up doing basketball. She was in Team 5. I saw the PE teacher sending people to different teams. Suddenly, he skipped two students and now I was in the same team as her. I was slightly dreading it as he was about to send me to her team, but perhaps this is fate. Destiny

With basketball not being my forte, I failed to showcase my inexistent prowess in sport. There was even a point where I passed it to the wrong player and despite that, she consolidated me. In the few times that I had the ball, I passed it to her. It was not that I aimed for her, however, she was just naturally “there”. Perhaps this again is fate. Although, I must say that I did find myself running slightly behind her (not to follow her but to get in a good position). This probably isn’t fate. Seems like I’m justifying everything on fate – Amor Fati.

We had our last lesson with each other. You would expect that this would be a great way to finish the day, however, it can also be the exact opposite – all dependent on how the lesson goes.

In this room, I still sit behind her but further to the left of her (too far away to talk to each other). Unlike him. He’s sitting right behind her, the class clown. The bad guy. We did a practice question and she got the question before everyone. He, being the irritating kid, started to by saying things like “Nope, you’re wrong” and “sit down. Don’t copy me.”. She, being the polite young adult, was fine with it. In fact, she did what many people would see as symbolising love in a relationship – she smiled whilst rolling her eyes. A silent “I love you”.

They say, “nice guys finish last” and that couldn’t be more true. I’m your “nice guy” and he’s your “bad guy”. He’s even already got a girlfriend, so can he stop “flirting” with my crush!

I was able to make her laugh once. No, I made her giggle. No, I made her slightly chuckle. The teacher made an analogy using basketball to explain a concept. As one of my countless attempts at making her laugh, even just smile: I said “ahh, I was atrocious today”. It felt like euphoria when I made her “slightly chuckle”, I even smiled to myself. All my A* are worth less than making her happy.