Wendy thought her day couldn’t get worse.

It started just like a normal day would: she woke up and went to class, had lunch after class and got to her part time job at the campus café. Only to encounter a familiar face staring her when she was changing to her work clothes. The familiar burning in the back of her neck made Wendy sigh and just hope for the best, she really didn’t want to discuss her romantic life with the person who was staring at her. Especially with the person staring at her.

“Sooyoung, what is it?” She calmly addressed her workmate while tying her apron, facing the mirror in her locker.

“You know,” Joy began moving slowly towards Wendy, hands behind her back and staring the ground. “… in another occasion I would certainly tell you to not call me Sooyoung, as I always do,” She stopped beside Wendy and laid back on the locker adjacent to Wendy’s. “…. but I won’t do that today because you look like someone ran you over with a truck. Twice.”

Wendy predicted this. She couldn’t fake her feelings to Joy. She was very smart and perceptive of these things. Especially when it was feelings stuff. She had been very downcast since that day in Seulgi’s house. She had been avoiding Seulgi the best she could without hurting her best friend’s feelings. She needed time to figure out what she had to do before, and she couldn’t end a life time friendship just because she was being impulsive. Wendy felt bad but she knew she had to this, it was the best variable she could think of.

“Look… Joy, I’m really not in the mood to talk about this. It’s very complicated and I need to do some thinking by myself.” She looked at Joy apologetically and turned to close her locker to start her shift. Wendy pulled the door open just for it to be closed by Joy. She stood tall by the closed door, staring down at Wendy.

“Seung— Wendy. Come on, you’ve been like this for weeks. You can’t seriously think it’s going the right way. Have you tried talking to her at least? She might be very understandable, she seems like a reasonable girl,” Joy offered, seemed a little bit too desperate for Wendy’s confort.

“What do you have to do with this? I already said I don’t need help.” She reached out to the doorknob, but Joy caught her hand and took it between hers.

“I know you need help. You just don’t want to ask for it,” Joy looked at their hands and sighed. “I’m your friend you , of course it’s my business too! I worry about you and your gay-for-my-childhood-friend heart.”

Wendy gave Joy a weak side smile and turned her face to the floor. It was getting harder not to cry every second. Joy was a good friend and she managed to upset her too. “Sorry, I’m just very—"

“Confused, I know. And it’s okay, I got you,” Then she felt her shoulders being caught by warm and suddenly she was pressed against Joy’s chest. “You’re sad and acting very strange, I just want to help. You’re my friend, I don’t want to see you like that. How about we talk about this after we close up?”

Joy gently pushed Wendy from her to look at her. She gave her a big smile, encouraging Wendy to smile too. Joy managed to somewhat bring a lot more happiness into her life, giving her confidence and acting like a sturdy pillar for Wendy to lean on. She was just starting to realize how big Joy’s impact in her life was.

“Yeah, that sounds good,” Said Wendy, trying not to tear up over the sudden act of affection.

She could now rest at ease, knowing that she won’t be alone to decide such big things in her life, like how she would confess her love to Seulgi without messing everything up.

Wendy got to her dorm just before rain started to pour. Thankfully she had enough groceries to cook a decent dinner, going out to grocery shopping was not an option right now. She thought just some greens with simple dressing, some rice and some meat would compensate the amount of trash she had consumed over the week. Living alone was hard.

She thought back to her conversation with Sooyoung and couldn't help but worrying a little bit. Were her feelings that apparent? She tried to shake off the thoughts and started prepping her vegetables and greens when her phone ringed. It was a message from Seulgi.

ddeulgi aka dumb bear

wannie, can we meet?

like right now

i miss you a lot and i want to talk to you

Wendy froze at the last message. What does Seulgi want to talk about? She didn’t do nothing wrong. Except partially ignoring her best friend for a long period of time, but other than that, she was innocent.

She decided not to reply. Maybe Seulgi would think she had late classes or late-night study sessions. She put her phone down with a heavy heart, felling guilty for not answering Seulgi when she used to answer her pronto. Wendy tried to focus her attention on her cooking, trying not to let the guilt consume her. As she cooked, she reminisced about all the times the shared with Seulgi. All the times her best friend acted like her girlfriend and all the times she wished Seulgi was her girlfriend. Wendy felt somewhat greedy for wishing that amazing and loved-by-everyone Seulgi would be her girlfriend. Since high school she felt like she was betraying Seulgi’s confidence by liking her, and even now in college almost and adult, she would feel guilty.

She let her mind wander back through her memories and soon enough she was done cooking her dinner. Work had been exhausting and classes are no good, but a good meal would cheer her up. Night time never felt so cozy, with a steamy bowl of rice and fresh vegetables in front of her, while it poured outside. Wendy forgot her previous feelings while enjoying her food and the mood she was enveloped in.

Wendy had a few bites of her food when someone knocked on her door. It wasn’t late, but it was late enough for her to have guests over. She went over to her door and opened. She didn’t process the identity of the person before her immediately, just stood staring at them trying to think of anything to say.

“Hi.” Seulgi said in a weak and nasal voice. She was drenched from head to toe, he bangs stuck to her forehead, water droplets falling from her chin. “You didn’t answer me, so I thought I’d drop by.” A meek smile escaped her lips, as if she was embarrassed of what she was doing.

“Hi,” Wendy scanned her once again and looked at her face. “You’re soaked, Seulgi, what were you thinking?” She took Seulgi’s hand and dragged her in her apartament.

“I needed to talk to you, and you wouldn’t answer so I came here. It started to rain when I was walking, and I didn’t have an umbrella with me so...” Seulgi elaborated on her story.

Wendy could only be mad at her. She was risking getting sick just because she thought she had to talk to Wendy tonight. “You dumb bear… you never learn. Come on, go take a hot shower, I’ll lend you some clothes and make you some tea. You can’t get sick because of me, I’ll never forgive myself.” She started guiding Seulgi towards her bathroom, but she felt resistance.

“No, I have to tell you something.” Seulgi stood firm and looked at Wendy confidently.

“You can tell me after you take a shower, you’re drenched! You’re gonna get sick, Seul—.” Wendy motioned towards her bathroom once more but was denied once again.

“Wendy, just let me talk okay?” Seulgi interrupted her with a calm yet firm voice and looked at her with pleading eyes. Wendy knew this look; Seulgi was nervous. Droplets of water were falling from her clothes and Wendy knew Seulgi wasn’t shaking because she was cold.

“Okay, so… I broke up with Jeongin,” Wendy was ready to say something but Seulgi cut her short. “I’m fine, he’s fine. It was a mutual decision. But what I really wanted to say is that I noticed.” She stopped looking at Wendy and stared at the floor. “I noticed, and I’m sorry it took so long.” Wendy wasn’t sure she understood what her best friend was confessing, but every time she tried to ask something Seulgi would ask her to just listen to her.

“I’m sorry it took so long for me to notice, really. I guess I needed time to let that sink in. My relationship with Jeongin was awesome. He is a good guy, a good kisser, he treated me very well, my family liked him. But you didn’t like him. I know you didn’t and even though that bothered me, I never gave it much thought. It was up until recently, when you started to avoid me that I traced back my steps and realized what I’ve missed.”

At this point, Wendy knew what was going on. But she had nowhere to run and Seulgi had figured out her secret crush. Seulgi wouldn’t want to be friends with her, it was all over.

Her nervousness was noticed by Seulgi, who came up to her and held her hands, tightly.

“Hey, it’s okay, just listen to me. I’m not over yet.” Seulgi reassured her resumed her speech while she caressed the back of Wendy’s hands.

“I realized I didn’t like Jeongin. Something was missing, and my mind would always go back to that one person who was with me since forever. Again, I’m sorry for noticing it so late, but I’m here now.” She grasped Wendy’s hands tighter. “I love you. I think I always have, I just didn’t notice it.” She looked Wendy straight in the eyes. “I love you, and I think you love me too.”

Wendy stood speechless, she could swear all her blood had been drained from her body. She felt light headed and that was not good, at all.

“Seulgi… I….” She was shocked and trying to think of something to say.

“It’s okay, it’s a lot to process and I dumped it all over you at once, maybe I should’ve told it in parts, and maybe I’m assuming a lot of stuff now, and since I’m an oblivious person I—” Seulgi’s rambling was cut short by Wendy’s voice.

“Seulgi, I love you too. I always have, but I figured it out earlier.”  Wendy grasped Seulgi’s face and stared at it for a second, heart full of emotions. She leaned forward, looking at Seulgi’s lips, she felt warmth in her chest and that weird feeling she’s been feeling since high school. But this time, it was different. Seulgi closed their distance and Wendy could swear she heard fireworks. Seulgi’s lips were soft as she imagined, and she tasted like pineapple chapstick. Wendy’s lightheadedness appeared once again as Seulgi put her hands on Wendy’s waist for a more comfortable position.

They broke the kiss and stared at each other smiling. Wendy felt something weird, and this time it wasn’t because of Seulgi or the kiss they just shared.

“Ah, yes, of course. I got wet.” Wendy said after patting her clothes to check their humidity. After realizing what she had said, she quickly looked back at Seulgi. “Don’t make puns. Not yet, I don’t think I’m ready.”

Seulgi let a laugh escape, eyes turning into crescents and Wendy was sure that was the most beautiful human being she knew.

“Sorry, I had to make it feel like a true first kiss. You know, like in the movies,” Wendy wasn’t sure she meant by that but continued to listen. “And sorry I got you wet, it wasn’t my intention.” She finished wiggling her eyebrows playfully.

“Shut up, you stupid bear! I swear to god…” She smacked Seulgi’s arm with a smile from ear to ear. She couldn’t believe it happened.

“I may be a stupid bear but now you’re the stupid bear’s girlfriend.” Wendy smiled at that and placed a soft peck on Seulgi’s lips.

“Yeah, I’d love that.” And with that, her dinner that was long forgotten, had been resumed when Seulgi was properly dressed and warm. The new girlfriends spent their first night together, sharing their stories and Wendy felt like she just won the lottery. Her feelings from earlier were washed away by Seulgi’s sweet and gentle actions.  

Maybe it wasn’t so bad to be in love with your best friend. Wendy had said her most precious words to the most precious human she knew, and she heard the same words from her. Seulgi’s “I love you” would be her most treasured words for a long time.