"No talk, No touch,No sleep together . I'm sorry Chansung, but you can sleep in the living room" Mom Junho's voice sounded hoarse, his eyes holding up crying and anger . Chansung and Junho stay in  silent , put their views on the ground floor up feeling very chaotic."But Mommy, he's our guest why he should -
"Junho, I think the my word is obvious enough. It's also not the my wishes, he only stayed one more night. You all right with it Chansung?" calm and gentle, but her firmness makes his guts shrunk.Junho glanced at him with deep concern, but on the other hand he’s also afraid of hurting his mother with his attitude. He knew his mother was strong enough to withstand the overwhelming anger after seeing her son ,making out with another boy. Chansung nodded slowly, he wanted to resist but could not do anything as a guest.

"Well then, you know what’s the meaning of my decision Junho. Now accompany me shopping, and you Chansung, please keep the house." Once he had completed his word to the point that can not be denied. She stood up, took her bag,followed by Junho who walked slowly behind her. Said, he did not walk but dragged his feet. He gave a gaze with regret and pain to Chansung when will close the door. Chansung gently smiled, he did not want to see him sad and Junho would get unhappy, saying quietly 'be careful'.

Chansung walk unsteadily and then lay down on the couch. Affixed her elbow on his knee to his head prop, was full, a lot of regret, sadness, anger, disappointment, pain in his heart, too suffocating. He had never felt this way as though someone was almost destroyed his dream.

There’s no another day here, he has not declared his love, he also still wants to do many things with it, but now even he could not talk, he can not touch him anymore, can not feel his warmth presence again. He squeezed his hair in exasperation, and cried aloud.
"Damn! Why I'm so stupid!" his voice choked, rising. No, I could not cry, I haven’t tried. He breathes in deeply..

He burst into the bathroom, brutally opened shower faucet and let the water poured into his copper head, flowing through his neck. Stand on one hand held him by tiles wall, Chansung was silent, his vision became blurry , he could feel the spray of water coming down to a muscular chest, hoping the coldwater cooled his popped mind.

Was on his mind now only Junho, how he could spend one night for ever in vain ?His anger began to rise to the top of his nerves, strained, and raise the body temperature. He screamed, cried aloud the name Junho, he did not care that someone would come and catch him, or someone reported to security guards to arrest him. Junho , Junho. . .

He stepped in Junho’s room , hand toweling,  drying his hair. Looking around, he smiled, just a few hours ago he and Junho making love in this place, Junho typical fragrant body still attached . He smirked again, belittle himself, now how could he be like that, it could be the last and first for him and Junho.

Quickly replace it with something dry clothes, then approached Jeonggam. Chansung  the kitten's head, he’s really getting better although still unables to walk, Jeonggam meowed softly, his face looked up at Chansung, understanding his mood.

Chansung reach his handycam was not so far from his current position, open the screen and start recording.
"Hi Jeonggam" he smiled to Jeonggam who always lifted his head as Chansung called him , he's so cute."You saw our first kiss, don’t you?" He chuckled sadly.
headed his handy cam it to another place, where Junho used to set mattress for them both. "Last night I was there with him" his smile looks painful, he lay down on the floor."Do you also watched what we do Jeonggam?" he laughs comforting himself, closing his handy cam screen. Suddenly something made him feeling very tired and sleepy, it's all right if I take a nap here? Last, tonight I will sleep in the living room, he told himself,  blurred and fell asleep in front of Jeonggam.

~

Junho carried a plate of kimchi for the last one in dining table. Weakly sit, he kept looking nervously to the door of his room. He knew Chansung asleep in there, it's already six o'clock, his mother even didn’t allow him to wake Chansung up. He sighed,eyes suddenly distracted when his mother came out of his room,followed by Chansung. His eyes were red, puffy, her hair a mess, her face looks too pale. No wonder, he had not eaten since this morning.

Junho drew a breath, they stared at each other, not moved. Fully worries, Chansung smiled , he knew good enough how Chansung always wanted to make him feel comfortable, but he could never lie to Junho. Junho unable to smiled back, his lips wont moved.
"EHM" she cleared ,voice broke their gaze.

Dinner was goes by very weird and quiet. All restricted to the food in front of them,leaving the unspoken word inside. After that she help Chansun pack up his stuff  quickly and removing it in the living room, Junho could only see theChansung luggage sadly. He would go so soon? his eyes watery, deeply inhaling to cry. And again, when their eyes met last Chansung lifting out of the room.

Junho rushed into his bedroom, then locked it quickly . He just couldn’t stand it anymore, he bumped his back , sank down on the cold bare floor, sobbing and crying very loudly. Without knowing someone out there, hear him, his hearts became so sore, very painful. Junho hugged himself, buried his head between his knees, crying harder and harder, its unstoppable, unbearable. He just did not want to lose Chansung like this, he did not want to be left again, he wanted to be with him.

Chansung pressed his fingertips, his hands trembling violently ,he bite his lower lips . It was now eleven o'clock, and he will leave at eight tomorrow morning. I have to do something. With hesitation he knocked on  Junho’s mother door.
"Yes?" his voice a little hoarse and echoed,
"It's me Chansung." Chansung swallowed hard. The door opened slowly, he saw her so messy, her eyes puffy, pink nose, lots of wrinkles here and there because of too much crying.
"Coincidence, I have to talk to you boy"

Chansung set foot into the room, his chest pounding. He sniffed. Pungent smell of strong alcohol airing the room. He was invited to sit on her bed.
"Bet you heard it" Chansung looked up, saw her playing something intoxicate liquid in a small glass. She sipped . This scene can not really explained , not at all expected it.

Chansung nodded, “Clearly”

“ing hurt me “ Chansung frowned, Junho’s mother changed too much , not even this other side of alcohol , but the words too. This must have been shocked her badly.

“I-Im sorry, mother “ Chansung stuttered, a gazed fully with anger down to his face .

“You shouldn’t “ His eyes widened , shouldn’t what ?

“ Excuse me ?”

“Shouldn’t be sorry , that’s my fault“ she sighed, gulped the limpid liquid once. “ Well, he had sacrifice his dreams for me . What kind of mother I am , letting go her son’s dreams for her sake.” She gulped down another .

“He used to cheerful person , everybody likes him, his beautiful smiling eyes. He talks much, too much until everyone had his secrets. He was so innocent , and came that day , when his dad passed away and I was so knocked down . I was so afraid of being alone, I was afraid of being left . so then, I confine him here , while his two older brother out there , reaching their dreams and fill us up with those money . “ Her voice trembled , her lips shivered . Salty droplets rolling down her puffy cheeks.

 “Well.stop being so nostalgic. Anyway , Chansung. . .”

“Yes ?” Chansung stuttered ,

“What your thought about my son . . .” Chansung swallowed hard.

“To be frank . He’s cute, beautiful, gorgeous, nice, I really love his smiling eyes, he had-

A chuckled paused his words, “ Stop spoiling my son , I mean yours” She patted her chest .

“Oh. . “ Chansung blushed .

“I love him “

“I sense it’s on your eyes “ Chansung blinked, “Pardon me for weird thing this morning, myself was too slow to work it out  “ Junho’s mother smiled.

“Just like you, I loved to see those smiling eyes . And as I wonder, as I put off my ego , I know you’ve bring it back “ Chansung smiled fully of hope,

“Is that mean ?”

“Get out. Get out my room now son, you have to sleep. “ she smiled playfully, shooing Chansung as accepting. Wha- She pulled Chansung off her bed, shoved him out . She shuckled in relief. “ Just keep his smiling eyes as always, don’t let me hear the sobs “

Chansung nodded excitedly , grabbing Junho’s room door handle .

“Whoah , not so fast . You can sleep in Seulong’s room son, a little bit messy but you won’t mind will you ?” Chansung frowned.

“But, I wanna sleep with him . This is. . . my last night . . .” He protested .

“It’s not . You’ll have plenty fine more night with him . “ She opened the door and pushed him in , shutted it tight . Chansung smiled to himself .

Thankyou Mother . Junho , I’ll see you tomorrow .

~

 Chansung stepped out of the shower. Shirtless, just draped a towel around his waist, he looked Junho’s bedroom door, haven’t wake up yet ? he smiled, I will soon build it after I finished getting dressed.

“Junho . . .” Chansung knocked slowly, smile tilted in his face. It’s 06.30 . But there isn’t cracking sound, mumbling, or answer.

“Yah . . . Junho ? “ he knocked again , feeling bad. No answer,

“Junho, what are you doing ? “ Chansung pulled the door knob gently , it’s unlocked . He paused, trailing his eyes among the empty room ,there wasn’t Junho here, only purring Jeonggam on the corner of the room . He rushed to Junho’s mother room .

“Mother , “ soon Junho’s mother opened up her door, seeing the curios Chansung .

“Whats the matter son ?”

“Did you see Junho ? his room’s empty “ Every breath take followed with fear . Junho’s mother gasped, she shook her head .

“Not again . I’ll be better checked him up “ She back off, then pulled her coat on.

"Hold on mother . Let me find him ! " Chansung sighted extremely worried.He could see her eyes glazed a glass,
"Junho often run away when he was at the end of his weariness, he could go early morning and returned late at night. "She explained, her lips trembling. Chansung nodded,
"Let me look for him.I also have some things I have not gotten around to it." Chansung smiled, put on his shoes, she smiled back at him,

"I knew I could count on you, son. Please bring Junho back, as soon as. "Chansung rushed out of the house. Actually! what did Junho think, he was acting dumb.
Chansung murmuring, thinking out loud amid the rural atmosphere that was quiet andcold in the morning. Keep going and keep going down the path, watchful, carefullylook at each side hoping Junho will soon be found. The morning air of countryside accompanied by fatigue breath choking him, better ran in the middle of broad daylight than morning that made shortness breath, he panted for breath, hads o far but no one he could find, where’s Junho?

His mind began to mess, he ran desperately, ran to high place.  Save a lot of hope there, takes thirty minutes to ride up and now he has little time left. Choked breath, sweating profusely, his temperature began to heat up, he moved as quickly as possible, stumbled, fell, and woke up, his feet barely touch the ground simultaneously.
Junho , really. Please stop mopping !

A hot, burning sensation filled up his heart. Chansung continued to run, no matter how many times he fell, his hands and feet hurt bruised tea tree twigs, didn’t bothering the morning sun shining on his nape that will make him unconscious instantly. Chansung looked up, the banyan tree is seen. He accelerated his climb up,
One, two steps.

"Junhoooooooooooooooo! "He shouted, his voice echoing in the empty space,
Gasping breath heavily, stared helplessly at the empty stone under a banyan tree.
He fell on the ground,
Junho, where are you? crawling with great effort, as would a broken leg, inhaled like acute asthma, he lay back in the stone.
"JUNHOOOO! "Once again he cried a trance, his eyes reddened, he wanted to cry,but could not.
The hope is perished, he could not anymore, there was no time left. Catch his breath back,

"Junho. . . . maybe you can hear it from your mother, or anyone. . . . but why, why cant I make you hear it from my mouth, I'm a fool. . .,"Chansung take a deep breath,
"I just want to say. . . I love you "so sad for shed a tears.

 Junho gasped. He shut his mouth, his body shaking, he had spent enough tears for last night and up this morning, but this time was unbearable, happend cry uncontrollably without making a sound, he does not want his boy behind noticed him. Chansung wiped his sweat roughly, chuckled sarcastic then rose up from his seat, he would return to Seoul.

Junho peeked from behind a banyan tree on the other hand, Chansung cluttered, his clothes stained with soil, red scraped along his hand. Chansung walked unsteadily, didn’t noticed as he stepped on a muddy soil by the drop of dew, he slipped. Junho out of hidingas his rflexes then lurking back as quickly as possible, made Chansung turned, get in there but  too late, Junho was gone from his gaze.

If I go see you now, I'll surely end up crying.

He could only stare at Chansung down, he was eager to meet him, hug him, but no,it's like saying goodbye, he would not do it, moreover to saying goodbye, Chansung’s returned to Seoul,that does not mean Junho will not see him again.

~~

Chansung got on the bus with the rest of the existing power, pulled the bag-pack containing clothes on his shoulder. He laid his weak in one of the empty chair near window. Someone tapped his shoulder,
"Hey Chansung-ah, how are you – ! WHAT”S WITH THAT FACE !?" His friend cried hysterically when Chansung turned

"Well Junsu, whether you can - WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU Chansung!?" Another friend wide-eyed kind of finding a zombie on their bus.
"Nothing, just lack of sleep" Chansung tried to smile but his lips only move one millimeter either. His friend sighed,
"Well, better be sleep Chansung we’re going to travel far enough and comfortable enough to sleep. Taecyeon, do not disturb him "A friend named Junsu dragged the others and sat before Chansung . Chansung looking at  fields on the edge of the bus parking lot,
I will miss this place. . . He pressed his forehead against the glass, at the same time, bus engines ignited, and the driver began to step on the gas pedal, the bus goes by slowly, out of the parking lot to un- asphalt road. He narrowed his eyes, focused to a familiar figure, the man looked at her,messy black hair,thin eyes,
"Junho!" Chansung bus banging on the glass, immediately wanted to get out but the bus was going too fast, shadow of Junho has lagged far behind. . .

~

.The boy opened the last box to put on his stuff . He threw his  in a soft mattress for a while, resting himself, as he opened the drawer, the rest goods to be packed. Chansung opened a drawer, pulled out several photo albums, labeled – Junho 1, Junho 2, then Junho 3, Junho 4, Junho 5, Junho 6, Junho 7. He smiled, opened one of the album.

When I recall your laughter as you turn back to look at me, 
I immediately become wanting to see you , Junho . . .

He giggled, to see the smiling boy in the photograph, his smile was so sweet combined with  crescent shape eyes, a lot of the same faces in a single album, he laughed again when he saw the figure in apron,stirring something in a pot , his smile widened when turned the next page there was a weird picture of them both ,yawning, laughing, sticking their tongue out, embracing, they seemed happy. He took another album, he found a small colored gray cat thatfallen asleep,
"Jeonggam .. I can not imagine how big you are now " he smiled playfully, frozed, when he saw the boy wrapped in a white blanket, it's amazing, he smiled bitterly at his past, shut down everything and put it in a cardboard box, reached into his drawer and find a few pieces of VCD, they have the same name as the album, Junho 1, Junho 2 - etc.

You're not the first person I took a date, hey  I have not even asked you out ! but you are my first love. . .

A few months after that day Chansung collected many girlfriends, women, all of them and did not last long,  of three months for longest, he’ll get unatraccted when they’re getting close . His last date run aground about four months ago, then decidedto ba a single- free man until now. They relly pissed him off.
He never missed a month without seeing the album or VCD ,those were comforting him besides his close friends, but the VCD and the album is doing better. He’s 23 present day, counted four years from that day. He really wanted to meet him, but alas, the circumstances are always impossible.

"Chansung ah! dont you hear Junsu's ranghis horn so loud ha! We’re waiting for you! "A man with chubby cheeks went into his room, with a rush pick up one of the cardboard box and take it out.
"Sorry Wooyoung!"
"Move on Move on! You will not make the oldman outwit , wont’t you! “the young brown-haired, angelic handsome face  lifted a large cardboard box,
"Im on my move, Nickhun" Chansung chuckled, getting up from his seat, and began hauling the goods down. They were moving out to one flat today, his father would promote them as a group of new boyband in Korea, and they must live in a flat to simplify all the activities, schedules and their relationship.

In fact he was half-hearted to do this, but what could he does? This connected to promote his photography career. Nothing harmed.

~

"Yes? Alright then, at four o'clock. You want to greet your new team?huh? "Park Jinyoung was on his phone. He pressed Loud Speaker button,
"Anneyonghasseo!" raspy voice from the other line sounded friendly and upbeat.
"Anneyonghasseo!" five responded with gusto. They will have a  new friend in team,six would waver in the end. Chansung father has been doing a hidden auditions and expedition in some areas in Korea, no one knows except the people who really have a strong desire to find out, even the announcement and registration is not announced in public.
"We will meet this afternoon! Im so eager to meet you there ! " , I’m sure he was laughing and smiling, Chansung thought.
"Yeah! But who is your name? Chansung's father did not want to tell us! "Wooyoung babbled out , Nickhun patted his head slowly.
"You should not use the word 'Chansung’s father ' dummy!" Wooyoung shut his mouth,giggled.

"You will know later, See you! Click! " he cut off the line.
"Ehehe I'm very excited! he has a y voice! whether the body is also y?" Taecyeon laugh out,
"EHM !" Junsu coughed behind the wheel.
"Whoops! Need help to hit him , Junsu -hyung? "Chansung who sat next to Taecyeon smirked.
"What the! I was joking! "Taecyeon defend himself.
~

"Hey Chansung! I bet He’s late again!" Wooyoung shouted, his hand still attached to  Playstation’s controller, there are  Nickhun next to him , wrinkled forehead, his eyes focused on the TV, very ambitious to beat Wooyoung.
"Hmm." Chansung just mumbled, his father's bad habits. He looked at the clock, he should be on his way to his friends wedding, he got photo shoot- job there.

"AAAACCKK!!"
Suddenly sound of  dropped items, knocking and screaming out of the kitchen.
"I told you not to touch it Taecyeon! It just boils! "Junsu cries could be heard up to the living room.
"They started it again,"  Nickhun muttered softly  . Chansung giggled and got up from his couch, picked up his jacket in the hanger, and draping the camera around the neck. Just he will say goodbye to his friend, when JYP butting up into the front door brought a good news.

"Hey kids!! I've brought your new member behind me! "he shouted,Chansung stunned ,Wooyoung Nickhun ignored their game and walked over, Taecyeon and Junsu out of the kitchen in a hurry.
Chansung’s view fixed on the the figure of boys behind him. Someone who is familiar,very familiar, but he has changed a bit. He several inches taller, his body now has arched muscle in some parts, slightly oval face, but his cheeks grew chubby, his hair became dark brown with cute  bangs on the front. He was wearing piercing in his left ear, the boy smiled.
His heart stopped beating, his breath caught. That smile that he always wanted to meet, face an ever-present in his mind for four years, the smile that always made ​​him laugh when he had a bad day,

That smile. . . It's him.


"Anneyonghasseo. I'm Lee Junho. Please for your help from now on, teammates "

Hi Chansung, we meet again.

Shall we begin our story now ?

FIN ~

A/N : Pheww ~~ it's done yeah it's done !

AAHH broken grammar, less vocab, miss-writing !! 

Sorry sorry sorry T - T and still, hopefully you like it ! :)

Thankyou so much for supporting me till i'm done with you comments and feedback ^ ^

Yummy comments recommended :p 

Love yaaa ~~