The wedding reception is the most fun Sana has had in a long time. Celebrating her best friends’ love with good food, expensive champagne and a nice DJ is all a girl could ask for. It feels great having all the girls together again in a formal event, and Sana is surprised to find that even Jackson fit well within their dynamic. After he showed her his robot dancing moves, she decided he’s not so bad after all.  

She and Jihyo don’t get another moment alone after their dance, but they stay close by as they hang out with their friends, and it’s incredible how much difference it makes to just have her there. Even if they’re not directly interacting, just feeling Jihyo’s presence around her is enough to make Sana feel more at ease. There are still many things unsaid between the two of them, but they both decide it’s best to put those things on hold and enjoy the party. It’s Mina and Jeongyeon’s day, after all, and they’re here to celebrate.

The sun is almost rising when Jihyo announces she’s heading back to her room so she can get some sleep before her mid-afternoon flight. She gestures for Jackson to come with her, but he shoots Sana a strange look and tells Jihyo he’s hanging back for a little while and will meet her later on.

Sana takes the hint, following Jihyo as she walks away. She thinks they’re going to Jihyo’s room, but instead, they find themselves sitting by a tree on the outside of the Hostel, the sky above them coloured in a mix of dark and light that seems to fit them perfectly. It’s a really beautiful place to say goodbye.

“Sana, I…” Jihyo starts as soon as she’s settled. There’s barely a foot of distance between them, sitting close enough that their legs touch. She breathes out her words while looking at Sana’s hands instead of her eyes. “I don’t even know what to say.”

“I do.” Sana gently places her hand on the side of Jihyo’s cheek, lifting her head up slightly so she could meet her gaze. Whatever reservations Sana has faded away as she looks at this beautiful girl who even after everything still makes her feel like her heart is about to leap out of her chest. Sana knows exactly what she wants, and maybe it’s selfish of her to say it, but she’ll never forgive herself if she lets Jihyo go without saying it. “Stay.”

Jihyo’s eyes widen and opens as if she’s about to say something, but Sana’s not finished.

“I know things will never go back to the way they were, and I don’t want them too. These past seven days made it very clear that you’re not the same person anymore, and I wanna get to know the person you’ve become, Jihyo, I want that more than anything. I’ll always want you in my life, in whatever way makes sense for us. And I think you want that too, so stay. This is your home.”

Jihyo smiles, but the tears in her eyes tell Sana she’s about to say no. Sana feels herself deflating, and she’s about to just walk away when Jihyo tugs at her hand to get her attention.

“Can I show you something?” She pleads, gesturing for Sana to sit back down.

Sana complies, watching as Jihyo grabs her phone from her dark clutch bag and opens up a photo for Sana to see. There are too many faces, most of them looking not much older than seventeen, and it’s hard for her to make out exactly who is who, but she spots Jihyo on the far right corner and recognizes the boy standing next to her as Jackson. She shoots Jihyo a quizzical look, waiting for her to explain.

“We took this picture last Friendsgiving at the community centre. It was a pretty amazing day.” Jihyo zooms in one of the faces, a solemn short-haired blonde woman looking to be about 30. “This is Carol, she’s been running the place for five years now and she’s...amazing. She taught me so much this past couple of years, you have no idea. She can be really scary at first but once you get to know her you realize she has the biggest heart ever.”

“I think I’d like her.” Sana grins. “She sounds a lot like someone I know.”

Jihyo blushes, turning back to her phone and showing Sana another face, this time a tall, muscular man with a scruffy beard and a large, goofy smile. “That’s Steve, my therapist. He’s a very busy guy, but he volunteers there every Thursday to give free sessions of the kids who need him most.”

“That’s your therapist?” Sana feigns disbelief. “He looks like a swimsuit model!”

“I know, right?” Jihyo laughs. “He’s a big fan of that whole healthy body, healthy mind philosophy. He makes me go on walks and eat lettuce, it’s awful.”

Sana rolls her eyes. “Well, thank god someone got you to stop living purely off pizza and cheap beer!”

“I still love pizza and cheap beer, thank you very much.” Jihyo elbows her teasingly before proceeding to the next face, a young girl with dyed green hair sporting a large baby bump. “That’s Cassie, she’s one of the kids that come there regularly. Her family wasn’t too happy when she decided to keep the baby, but we were there for her and things have smoothed over since. We’re helping her with getting her GED and she’s looking up some kid-friendly colleges she can apply to. She had her little girl a couple of months ago, cutest baby ever. Cassie named her after Carol. Everyone always names the babies after Carol.”

“You sound a little bit jealous.”

“I just think Jihyo is a really strong name and should be considered more often.” She jokes, ḿoving on to a slightly younger, strikingly skinny light-haired girl. “This is Eliza. Her birth family is… complicated. Her mother struggles with heroin addiction and Ellie ended up following the same path. Thankfully she’s been placed in a really nice foster family and she is doing a lot better now. She got her 1-year sobriety chip last month, Carol and I both came to the ceremony. Ellie was so proud.”

“Wow, Jihyo…” Sana is at loss for words. “That’s amazing.”

Jihyo just nods, her fingers zooming in on a short boy with dark curly-haired. “Don’t tell anybody, but this one, Theo… he’s my favourite, he’s just the bravest person I’ve ever met. He’s fifteen and he came out as trans about a year ago. His family was not supportive, but we helped him gather some resources to help educate them and they’ve been slowly coming around.  I’m usually the one who accompanies him to his doctor’s appointments, and a few weeks ago he finally started hormone therapy. You should’ve seen him, he was glowing .”

Sana notices that Jihyo, too, seems like she’s glowing as she talks about these kids she’s clearly so connected to, and it makes her look so beautiful Sana feels her own heart skipping a beat. She thinks of the Jihyo from three and a half years ago and she’s so happy to know that broken 18-year-old girl was not only able to build herself back up but also found the strength to dedicate her life to helping other kids do the same. It’s incredible. She is incredible.

“These kids, most of them don’t have a lot of people that they can trust, but they trust me. I can’t leave them, I can’t leave my life in Busan behind. No matter how much I want to.”

It still hurts, but Sana understands now. Jihyo might have grown up in Seoul, but this new version of her belongs in Busan and it’s painful but it’s also beautiful.

“I’m so proud of you, Jihyo.” Sana breathes out, and while it’s a complete truth it feels like it’s not enough to encompass what she’s feeling. She never knew it was possible to feel so fulfilled while hearing about someone else’s accomplishments, to be so happy to see someone else’s happiness. Maybe that’s what love is all about.

“You are?” Jihyo’s voice trembles with a mixture of hope and insecurity, her eyes uncertain.

“Of course I am!” Sana cups the girl’s face with both her hands, trying to make sure that Jihyo understands the full depth of her words. “Of course I wanted you to stay here with me...but I get it. And I couldn’t possibly be more proud of the person you’ve become.”

Later on, when Jihyo catches her flight to Busan and Sana comes back to her empty apartment, she knows it will hurt like hell, but as she looks at Jihyo right now she can’t even feel the pain. Sana is glad Jihyo found her place, even if it’s on the other side of the country.

(Their happy ending may not be like Mina and Jeongyeon’s, but it’s as happy of an ending they could get).

She knows they’re just postponing the inevitable, but Jihyo accepts Sana’s offer to drive them to the airport nonetheless. She and Jackson say goodbye to her old friends, and her heart feels heavy as she slides her suitcase into Sana’s trunk. Leaving Seoul is a lot harder than she thought it would be.

Returning to Busan is the right thing to do, she has no doubt about it, but the past week reminded her of how great it feels to be around her old friends and from now on she will probably miss them a lot more than she did before. Even worse, those seven days also confirmed something that deep down she always suspected: Sana is the love of her life, plain and simple. No matter how much they grow apart, no matter how much they both change, Sana will always be the love of her life. There’s no one else in this world as beautiful, as understanding, as wholly and completely good. She is a bright spot of light in a world that’s mostly dark and Jihyo loves her so much she almost considers throwing her entire life away just so she can be close to her.

 Almost.

They mostly make small talk on the long ride to the airport, trying to distract themselves from their impending goodbye. Sana tells Jihyo and Jackson stories from her college life, her new friends, her new apartment, all of the things she’s been up to over the past couple of years. She doesn’t mention Eunha directly, but Jihyo thinks about her anyway. Would they get back together now that Jihyo will no longer be in the way? The mere idea of it makes her stomach turn, but she knows she has no right to be jealous, especially not after Sana put herself out there and asked her to stay and Jihyo turned her down. She just wants Sana to be happy, and if Eunha can make that happen, then Jihyo is all for it.

(Thinking about it still leaves a bitter taste in , though).

There’s barely half an hour left before their plane takes off when they get there, so their goodbyes have to be quick. Jihyo tells herself it’s probably better this way.

Sana gives Jackson what seems to be a genuine hug, and Jihyo is happy to see those two getting along. She understands why Sana didn’t like Jackson very much at first, but if they had a chance to get to know each other better she’s sure they would be good friends. They’re her two favourite people in the world, after all. 

Before letting go, Sana whispers something in his ear that Jihyo can’t really make out and even though she really wants to ask she decides it’s better not to. Once they’re done Jackson excuses himself and enters the boarding area, allowing for Jihyo and Sana to say their farewells in private.

They stare at each other silently for a moment, their shared look saying so many things they wouldn’t dare to speak aloud. Jihyo notices Sana is close to crying so she pushes her own tears down, trying to be strong for both of their sakes.

“I’m really sorry this has to end so soon.” Jihyo breathes out quietly, holding both of Sana’s hands tightly. “I had a really good time, coming back here.”

“I can’t believe it, I mean… the first couple of days felt like years and then the rest went by so fast.”

Jihyo nods, knowing exactly what she means. The moment the two of them started actually talking to each other, time began to fly by. “I wish we hadn’t wasted so much time, in the beginning, ignoring each other.”

“I think we needed that time, though… to readjust.” It’s not clear if Sana is talking about their awkward first couple of days or about the three and a half years that came before that. Jihyo knows she’s right regardless. They weren’t good for each other before she left.

(Could they be good for each other now? They’ll probably never know).

“Jihyo, can I… can I ask you something?” Sana looks so vulnerable right now there’s no way Jihyo would ever say no to anything she wanted.

“Of course.”

“Promise me this time will be different.” Her tears start falling down her cheeks now, but her voice is firm and decisive. “Promise me you won’t disappear again. You don’t have to come to visit every other weekend or whatever but maybe send us a few texts like once a month or so? Just so we know how you’re doing?”

Jihyo can’t keep herself together while watching Sana look so absolutely heartbroken, so she wraps her arms around her as tightly as she possibly can, pressing her lips to Sana’s ear as she whispers her response. “I promise, okay? If you ever want to talk to me, I’ll just be a phone call away.”

“I always want to talk to you, Jihyo.”

Sana starts to pull away from their embrace but stops halfway, letting her eyes linger on Jihyo’s lips while there’s barely an inch of distance between them. For a second it’s like gravity decides to stop working completely and Jihyo feels drawn to Sana in the same natural way she’s usually drawn to the ground beneath her, but she comes to her senses before things go any further.

“We shouldn’t…” She’s so close to Sana’s face she can feel the other girl’s breathing. “It’s only going to make this harder.”

Sana lets out the saddest, tiniest laugh. “I don’t think it can get any harder, Jihyo.”

“Well…” It’s incredible that even in a moment like this Sana still manages to make her smile. “I guess you have a good point.”

She gives in, pressing their lips together ever so delicately. Their kiss barely lasts a second, and Jihyo is sure she couldn’t have handled any longer than that without falling apart completely. Sana’s lips are exactly as soft as she remembers and they taste like cherry lip balm and happiness. Jihyo buries her fingers into the back of Sana’s hair as it happens, and it takes her every last fiber of strength not to take it any further.

“Take care of yourself, okay?” Sana pleads as they separate, hands still cupping Jihyo’s cheeks.

“Of course.” Jihyo gently tucks away a loose strand of Sana’s hair so she can get a better view of her eyes. “And you take care of yourself, too.”

There’s so much more they want to say, but they hear the voice from the intercom announcing it’s the last call for Jihyo’s flight. Their time is up.

“Call me when you get there. Please.” Is the last thing Sana says before Jihyo turns around to leave.

“I will. I promise.” It’s a promise Jihyo intends to keep. She is never going to let herself hurt Sana ever again.

Jihyo walks away without looking back, knowing very well that if she does she might never make it to her flight, so she clutches the handle of her suitcase tightly and keeps her head up as she walks through airport security. Only when she finally catches up with Jackson she lets go, burying her face in his chest and finally allowing her sobs to come out.

“You did great this week, Hyo .” He whispers as he holds her. “Steve is gonna be proud.”

(Why does doing the right thing have to hurt so much?)