I ran inside the hospital, trying to find his room. A door with number 4031, the same number was written in my phone, was there in front of me. I breathed in and out before opening the door, expecting him to be unconscious but he was there, sitting, looking out the window.

"San, you okay? What happened?" I walked close to him with a face portraying a worried look.

"Oh, Mun!" He opened his arms with a wide smile and welcomed me with a warm hug.

I hugged him back and sat on his bed, waiting for him to answer my questions, but he was all silent. One of my eyebrows lifted, "so? Are you not gonna tell me what happened to you? Or are you not answering because it's the same thing as always?"

San had been collapsing from time to time because he got too exhausted. He was never like that until some time after our parents died. He had been coming back and forth on the same hospital. I told him to do a serious check-up just in case, but he kept saying he didn't have time, he needed to practice more because his group is going to debut soon. It had been a year since that and I still had no idea when he's going to debut. The company was small and poor, I honestly didn't think there really would be a debut.

"Oh, right," he giggled. "I, uh... have been diagnosed with a disease."

Silence filled the room for a second before I broke the ice, "c'mon now, that's not funny anymore. You're just too tired again aren't you?"

"No. I'm serious this time. But hear me out, my group is going to debut this June and they only give me two years of dispensation--"

I stood up with a frown with hands gesturing him to slow down, "whoa, whoa, whoa. No. Wait a damn second. What's the disease you've been diagnosed of?" 

He was silent.

I lifted an eyebrow again, questioning his silence but it didn't seem like he would answer anytime soon. It was a long silence until I called his name in demand, "San."

Still, no answer.

"Are being serious right now--" I was about to rise my voice but San cut it.

"I really can't tell you, okay? But I will be healthy again, so will you please hear me out?"

"No, I won't. Your mind is not in its right place. It can be healed, right? Or are you hiding it because it can't?"

"Of course it can! It's just that ..if I tell you, you'd just worry about me all the time." He looked down.

Why do I feel like I'm the bad one here??

"If you don't tell me, I will think about it more."

"No, you won't. You'd give up because you can't know what it is. Listen, I'm fine, alright? I'm not suffering or dying. I'm just.. I just can't move a lot for a quite some time."

"How long is 'quite some time' exactly?" I crossed my arm.

He bit his lower lip and smiled nervously, "... about three years?"

"Three-- what kind of a freakish 'I'm okay' disease is that??"

"It's nothing dreadful, I promise. I was just too tired these past months and now I just need to rest for three years until my strength come back like normal."

"I-- ..I'm at lost of words." With disbelief, I shook my head

"Just trust me. I really need you to cover my place for a year."

My head and shoulders were defeated as I sighed. "Fine.. but what place?"

He tapped his bed. I sat on it just like what he wanted.

He patted my head and smiled, "I'm even more grateful we're identical twins now."

My eyebrows pulled each other in. "..Do you want me to switch place with you here??"

"That's kinda clever but it's honestly too idiotic, you know. What if I died on one of the stages?" he laughed at me.

I rolled my eyes, "I swear to god I'm gonna punch you when you're all fine."

He laughed again.

"Well.. since my agency gave me two years of dispensation, train yourself to be an idol and debut as a member before they really kick me out of the group." he smiled.

My mouth turned agape when I finally got the point he's trying to make.

×××

i know, awkward names. i tried. im gonna explain their names later on the story and i hope it fixes the awkwardness agdjslks

anyway, this story will be going pretty slowly, please drink your tea, and enjoy!