I stood at the far end of the diving board my heart thumping as I took a deep breath readying myself for the jump. My coach stood down on the concrete turned away talking on the phone to her husband.

I was beginning to get impatient waiting on her, my foot tapping the diving board restlessly. My eyes dart from her figure to the end of the white board.

I take a deep breath, I didn’t need her to watch me. I let my breath out slowly before bending my knees a bit to begin my jog down the board. Once I reach the end I remember what I practiced jumping diligently off the board and into the air. I tuck my legs in and my body backward.

Only I must’ve not have jumped out as far as I thought. The back of my head slams against the end of the diving board, a ringing sound spilling into my ears, the lights are suddenly as bright as the sun, pain floods from all over my body to the back of my head.

And when my body hits the water it’s like I’m frozen. The cool liquid me in and my vision slowly starts to blur into a dark black. Was this how it would all end?

All because I was impatient?

A burning sensation comes from my chest, undoubtedly from the water that was filling my lungs.

The last thing I see as my body floats further towards the bottom of the pool was my hand that was raised up as if it was calling for help on its own.

-

My eyes snap open in my bed, my breathing coming out ragged.

“Mina, get up school starts in an hour!” My mom calls from down the hall.

I quickly sit up wiping the sweat that had formed on my forehead off. I take a couple more deep breaths trying to forget my nightmare.

I had been having it every night since that night. The night I almost died five years ago. The nightmare felt so real because t was real at one point.

To this day I haven’t been able to sit foot in the water again. My body freezes and cramps up almost immediately as soon as I touch something deeper than a foot.

I moved schools and everything. I couldn’t bare to face anyone at my old school after I quit the swim team. So I found myself at a new school once I had recovered. I also found myself compelled to go to the pool the first day of school when I got there. And since I could no longer be on the swim team myself I became their manager.

Now that I’m a senior in high school it’s my last year being able to manage the team. I would have to say goodbye at the end of this season. I was undeniably sad, I found it oddly fascinating watching the others swim. It was beautiful, and almost foreign. Since I could no longer do it myself.

“Ready?” I ask Riel. She was prepping for finals coming up later this week. So I was timing her laps.

“Yes!” She cheers.

“Go.” I click on the timer whenever she lunges forward off her start. My eyes watch her body as she glides smoothly through the water. I smile to myself at her perfect technique.

My eyes lose focus of Riel whenever a series of clapping emits around me. I glance at the coach who was cheering next to me.

He glances at me. “Taeyong just beat his record time, if he keeps this up he’ll win gold.”

I nod my eyes flitting over to said boy. He was lifting himself out of the water and onto the concrete. His eyes meet mine and I quickly look away back to Riel.

Taeyong was the best on the team and was also the most beautiful swimmer. It was like he belonged in the water, like he lived there.

He was our teams ace. Everyone loved him. Everyone either wanted to be him, be his friend, or date him. But Taeyong, despite having the looks of a model was very modest. He was quiet, kept to himself and his group of friends. Never really dated much. It seemed his only focus was being in the water.

Which I can admire about him. He was hard working and didn’t take advantage of knowing everyone loved him.

When he first came to our school everyone was iffy about him. He looked like an extremely cold person. But he quickly made friends and the rumors stopped.

Now everyone loved him.

I couldn’t help but think if everyone would love me too if the accident hadn’t of happened.

I click to stop the timer whenever Riel finishes her lap.

“You need to shave off two more seconds to beat Lee Jiyoung’s time from last years finals.” I say glancing down at the clipboard I had in my hands.

Riel huffs. “Darn it.”

“Okay guys practice time is up.” Coach yells from my side. Several of the team rushes past me bumping into me and I stumble forward a bit.

A firm grip on my arm keeps me from possibly falling into the pool. I glance at who caught me and make eye contact with Taeyong.

“Yah, be careful.” He hums, releasing his hold on me as he continues walking by me.

I let out a sigh of relief. I didn’t realize I was so close to the pool.

Coach rests a hand on my shoulder. “Mina do you know where the other stopwatch is?”

I shake my head. “I only have this one.”

He hums glancing around. “Yuta must have it. I have to leave if I tell Yuta to hand it to you if he finds it will you keep it safe?”

I nod. “Yes sir.”

-

“Mina.” Taeyong’s voice comes from behind me. What did he want?

He pulls his hand out of his shorts pocket showcasing the stopwatch coach was searching for. “Yuta gave me this to give to you.”

“Oh thank you!” I smile towards him, taking the stopwatch into my hand. I notice a pair of headphones wrapped around the strings.

“Oh my headphones.” Taeyong comments bringing his hand up to try and untangle them.

“I can get them out.” I shrug glancing up to find he’s moved right in front of me. I pause smelling the chlorine on him. He smelt like home. A home I could never go back to.

I move back to work on untangling the two things whenever Taeyong speaks up again.

“You can’t swim,” He states my eyes widening. “So why are you managing the swim team?”

My eyes meet with his shocked. How does he know?

The stopwatch falls from my hands. “Huh?”

Taeyong bends down to pick it back up. “The way you look at the water and how you avoid it makes it obvious.” I quickly take some steps backwards.

He looks back up and his eyes widen a bit. “Mina!”

On my last step backwards my foot doesn’t touch anything when I step back and my entire body starts falling backwards. Taeyong grabs my arm yanking me forward. I land with a huff on the concrete and a splash indicates he’s fallen into the water.

I quickly turn to look at him. His wet hair was matted to his forehead, his clothes sticking to him now.

“I’m so sorry! I caused this.” I bend down to look at him as he floated in the pool.

He raises an eyebrow at me seeming not too amused.

“I haven’t told anybody I can’t swim, how do you know?” I ask him, he turns away ignoring me.

“It’s hot today, isn’t it?” He changes the topic.

I sigh. “Do you not like summer?”

With his back facing me he speaks up again. “I just don’t like being sweaty, sweaty and nasty to the point my clothes stick to me. Breathing is harder since the humidity and heat too.”

“Ah, maybe that’s why you are so good at swimming then?” I shrug. “Nobody swims faster than you. And when you’re in the water it seems like you belong there, like it’s your home.”

He turns swimming to the edge of the pool where I was bent down. “Is that how I seem?”

“Yes.” I nod showcasing a small smile.

He nods and grabs my hands resting his head on them. My cheeks heat up at the gesture but I knew he didn’t mean anything by it. “I love it.” He says quietly.

He pulls away from me to hoist himself out of the pool. Water dripping off him as he does. “I’m going home, and since it’s late I’ll walk you to yours.”

“Huh? Oh no you don’t have to.” I quickly shake my hands around to disagree with him.

He pauses mid-hoist out of the pool to stare at me like a lost puppy.

I shake my head at how adorable he could be, plus I felt bad, he was soaked because of me. “Please walk me home.”

-

After buying Taeyong a popsicle because of the incident earlier we walked towards my place. He had changed out of his soaked gym clothes to his uniform so he was sweating awfully bad.

“So why can’t you swim?” He asks glancing at me.

I swallow. “I has an accident five years ago. I used to be on a swim team myself. I was practicing my high dives and one day I decided to go ahead and dive in while my coach wasn’t watching. I ended up jumping too short causing my head to bang off the diving board and to fall into the water.” I pause. “I had a concussion from hitting the board so I was sort of just frozen in the water. If my coach hadn’t of gotten off her phone call at that moment I would’ve died.”

Taeyong nods slowly. “That’s a very understandable reason as to why you can’t swim.”

I lower my gaze. “I know. Anytime I get in water past my ankles my legs cramp up and I just remember the feeling of sinking to the bottom of the pool wondering if I was going to die.”

I look away from Taeyong to sigh. “If you’ve realized it, I bet everyone else has too.”

Taeyong chuckles. “I noticed cause you’re easy to read.”

I slap my hands to my face. “It’s embarrassing!”

I shake my head. “It’s not even that I can’t swim like other people. It’s that I literally can’t swim, my legs refuse to move.” I let my hands fall to my sides. “I love that watery world so much but I’m scared of it at the same time.”

I bite my lip. “No matter how hard I try to stay away from it I find myself drawn back towards it.”

At this point we’ve arrived at my house, so we’ve stopped walking. “If you like it so much, do you want me to teach you how to swim?” He asks.

I whip my head towards him surprised.

He shrugs. “I mean like you say I’m quite good at swimming.”

I shake my head quickly. “No, I would feel like you’re mocking me then. I know how to swim I just can’t.” I turn away from him to walk closer to my house. I would never show him something so embarrassing. How I freeze up and look like an idiot.

“Mina.” I felt him rest his chin on my head, his torso pressing into my back. My heart speeds up. “Don’t be mad at me, it’s just that I thought you’d look beautiful in the water.”

Even after he’s gone I could smell his scent. Chlorine and his unique scent mixed together.

-

Riel rests her hands onto the concrete of the pool huffing and puffing. “Mina you’re so brutal, you’re killing me!”

I laugh glancing down at all of her times. “Your time this time was the best, you’ve shaved off more time.”

She smiles up at me.

“Good practice, Taeyong.” I hear coach say from behind me. I glance back to see Taeyong walking out from the locker room. He had been in the weight room until now. He usually swam after everyone left. Him and the coach would stay behind to work on his laps and times.

Taeyong’s eyes meet mine and I quickly look away. Dammit he saw me.

“You were looking at me?” Taeyong says coming up to me and I quickly pout. I was hoping I could avoid him today.

“Hey Mina!” Coach draws the two of us a part.

“Hmm?”

“Can you stay after and watch Taeyong practice? My wife is working overtime today.” Coach sheepishly asks.

I slowly nod. Why me though? I have the worst luck.

-

I click the stopwatch stopping Taeyong’s time as he rips off his swim cap and goggles. He sits them on the side of the pool resting his arms on the concrete letting his head rest on his arms staring up at me.

“What?” I question him.

“You use that a lot.” He points at my clipboard.

I nod. “Yeah.” I hold it against my chest. “The swim team works so hard so I feel like I should too. I want them to succeed since I can’t. I will do anything to help them.”

I hear him sigh before lifting himself out of the pool. He hums once he’s out. “You know everyone’s first names and cheer everyone on. The swim team is huge, you’re doing a lot for us you know.”

I did attend every meet, I cheered loudly for everyone even if they couldn’t hear me over everyone else.

“Yeah that’s true.” I note, I hadn’t thought of it that way.

“It makes me happy that you do that,” He pauses. “I’m also worried since you can’t swim but everyone knows that you’re kind and helpful so it’s okay.”

“I hear your voice clearly too, Mina.” Taeyong says glancing towards me.

He-he did? I notice his hand move up towards my hair and my cheeks heat up to another level. Why is he saying this?

I lean away from his touch. “Mina-.”

And suddenly I’m falling into the pool. My legs immediately lock up and I felt myself sinking further below the water. I was only under for half a second before Taeyong’s tugging me back up and between him and the wall of the pool.

My arms immediately wrap around his neck to keep a hold of him. If I let go I’d sink back under.

His hands rest on the side of the pool. “Mina, are you okay?”

My fingers were gripping onto him so tightly I had accidentally dug into his skin. “Ow.”

He tugs my hand off his back quickly which surprises me. “Oh.” I start to sink a bit again. My hands shake in his.

“Don’t move, I’ve got you.” Taeyong says suddenly wrapping his arms around my waist, tugging me away from the wall and into the middle of the pool. Once he stops in the middle do I notice how close we are.

I let out a shaky breath into his neck. “This is the first time in a long time I’ve been in the middle of a pool.”

I felt him pull away slightly, his hand wrapping around my foot.

He glances down at my foot in his hand. “Your legs really have locked up.” He releases my leg. “If I let go of you now...”

I quickly wrap my arms around his neck again. “No, don’t!”

“...If I do, you’ll cling to me tighter.” He hums into my neck, his hands suddenly pull my body back from him and up into the air a bit until I’m looking down into his eyes, our noses brushing against one another’s. I swallow, my hands rest on his bare chest. “Right now, you won’t be able to live without me.”

Seconds pass that felt like minutes before he speaks again. “Since you’re afraid, would you like to get out of the water?”

He pulls back slightly.

I lower my gaze staring down at the clear water rippling around us. “I want to stay like this a little longer.”

-

In the water, floating, and drifting along. That’s all it was. If Taeyong would’ve let go of me I surely would’ve died but for some reason I trusted him.

I liked him.

And from the looks of it he liked me too.

I never imagined that this would happened.

“Can you believe that finals are next week?” I overhear Riel say to Yuta.

That’s right, this will all end next week.

Suddenly Coach flings the door to the pool open, he stomps past us all, two of the swim team members behind him with their heads lowered and into his office slamming the door behind him. I look around confused. What was wrong?

“Jaehyun and Dami?” Riel speaks up. “I wonder what happened?”

“Oh, they got caught kissing in the storage room after school yesterday.” Yuta murmurs between Riel and I.

My heart thumps.

“Is that why Coach is mad?” Someone else comments. “There’s got to be more students doing it?”

Taeil, our team captain sighs. “Well, you wouldn’t know since you’re a first year.” He pauses looking at the Mark. “But during my first year , some third year students got caught well...doing stuff after school. It wasn’t kissing.”

He sighs. “As punishment the school decided to withdraw the swim team from finals.”

Yuta shakes his head. “So that’s why Coach is so mad.”

My eyes widen, I remember that now. All those students who worked their asses off to go to finals had to give up.

-

The day of finals I walk down the hall readying myself for the competition. My stopwatch slips out of my hand and clacks onto the floor. I don’t know why I had brought it in the first place, but it usually comforted me.

“You dropped this.” Taeyong’s voice comes from behind me. I glance back at him surprised to see him. He should be out with the rest of the team.

“Taeyong?” I lower my gaze.

He holds the stopwatch out for me to take back.

“You’re easy to read, you’re asking yourself ‘was that shameful?’” His gaze was dull like it usually was outside the water.

I hold the stopwatch to my chest. “This is my last meet with you guys.” I lower my gaze. “I can’t make trouble for you guys by doing something I shouldn’t.” I was graduating this year, I'd be leaving all of them behind.

His eyes seem to change and for once I couldn’t tell exactly how he was feeling. “You shouldn’t worry so much. Everything’s fine. That didn’t have any meaning,” His gaze tears away from me. “To you anyways.”

His gaze moves back to me and my hands fall to my sides. He grabs ahold of them both. “Today I’ll do my best, so like always please cheer me on.”

-

“Captain Taeil just advanced to the finals! That makes two from our school including Taeyong!” Riel cheers coming up next to me.

He was doing so well. “I’m going to go see Taeyong, okay?” Riel nods, her and Yuta following after me.

Thank god everyone is happy today.

“Oh it’s Taeyong from SM High!” Two of the managers from YG squeal as he passes by.

“Finalists please take your places.”

I freeze in place, I was too late. I couldn’t talk to him.

“Mina lets go get our seats!” Riel nudges me and I lose my balance falling into the pool.

Taeyong wasn’t there to help me this time. It was Riel and Yuta. They pull me back up on the concrete platform.

“Mina are you alright?” Yuta asks throwing his towel over my wet hair. “You really scared us!”

I cough up some of the water that went down my throat, trying to stop myself from shaking.

“Why didn’t you tell us you couldn’t swim?” Riel huffs, bending down in front of me.

What? They didn’t know? But...my eyes flicker to Taeyong who was sliding his jacket off and stepping up on the start platform.

Riel follows my gaze. “Oh Taeyong’s final race is beginning.”

Taeyong was the first to notice I couldn’t swim? He noticed that I looked out for everyone.

I stand up next to Riel to watch as Taeyong dives into the water. Our entire school and families screaming and cheering for him.

There’s no way he could hear me.

‘I can hear your voice clearly, Mina.’

-

I couldn’t end up bringing myself to cheer for him. I walk through the small crowd that was still here looking for him

Someone else notes his absence. “Hey where’s Taeyong? He’s the hero of the day?”

Was he possibly in the pool?

“Mina? Do you know..?” But I’m already around the corner.

I enter the pool room and my eyes immediately find Taeyong’s back as he floated in the middle of the pool. It was my last day here but he still had another year to swim in this pool.

He seems to notice my presence as he turns to look at me. “Mina, you didn’t cheer me on today.”

I step forward a bit to hear him more clearly.

“It wasn’t just your last.” He says, I could now place the look on his face that I couldn’t figure out earlier. It was sadness. “Like you, I was in pain this whole time too. No matter how much I swim without you here...”

I run forward falling into the pool. Hands are instantly on my waist pulling me up and out of the water. “Mina! What are you..?”

I rest my forehead on his and he stops talking. “It was awful...” not being able to call his name. “I was always suffering...” before I got closer to him.

I push forward planting my lips onto his, Taeyong lets us sink back into the water. One of his hands on my cheek the other firmly wrapped around my back.

Taeyong allowed me to be in the water again, the watery world I had missed so much. My home. I felt safe here again, even if I couldn’t swim. Taeyong was here to keep me alive.

We come up for air, breathing heavily. His hand that rested on my cheek moves a bit to where his thumb rests on my lip. Our foreheads still pressed together.

“I’m still in pain.” I murmur, my legs were so stiff and the constant reminder of drowning was still in the back of my mind.

He leans closer his lips ghosting across my lips. “Of course you are. Without me, you can’t live.”

His lips press into mine again and I feel myself sinking deeper and deeper, drowning, until I can’t breath anymore. This time around it wasn’t because of the water though, it was because of Lee Taeyong. I was drowning in him.

---

A/N: Hope you enjoyed! I have posted this once before, it's on my Vingle account (username: Halsyeon) but anyways I hope you enjoyed this!!