Chapter 11

There were so many paintings in Sakura's workshop. But they were all covered with white cloths. This is the first time I entered her workshop. She let me watch her work and I was so impressed. She looked different when she was working, even more beautiful if that's even possible.

She was painting the whole canvas in front of her with bright red; while I stood behind her and then pace around. I walked closer to a huge canvas covered with cloth, tempted to take a peek. I glanced at Sakura and noticed that she was still concentrating on her piece. Slowly, I lifted the cloth and saw something black. I realized it was a huge painting of someone.

When I try to peek more to see who it was, someone grabbed my hand, stopping me from doing so.

It was Sakura.

She smiled and pulled my hands away from the painting.

"I've told you not to peek on my unfinished paintings," she warned, but with a smile.

"I'm sorry Kkura, it's too tempting. Are all these unfinished?" I asked, pointing at others in the room.

She smiled.

"I want to put them in my exhibition one day. I'll give you a special invite and you'll get to see all of them."

"Aww, I have to wait until then?"

"Well, you have to wait. Trust me, my artworks are worth the wait," she replied with a chuckle.

I looked at her who was grinning proudly like a little girl.


It's that smile that had me captured so helplessly in love.

It's not just her smile, it's her whole existence.

I fell in love with every little detail about her,

her voice,

her pair of round eyes,

the way she tucked her hair behind her adorable ears,

the sound of her laugh..


I could go on and on and on.


I noticed she was staring at me with creased eyebrows, something she did when she's curious.

Even her eyebrows are attractive to me.


"Eunbi, is everything okay?" she suddenly asked.

"Hmm? I'm okay…"

"But…" she moved closer to me and gently cupped my face.

I froze as her hand touched my skin.

"But, why are you crying?" she asked tenderly.

I was startled, "Crying? I'm not-

I paused when I realized that my cheeks were wet. I cried without realizing.

"What's the matter?" she asked.

I looked at her without saying anything. I could tell that she was worried about me.

"Eunbi, why-

"Kkura…”

"Yes?"

"I'm sorry I can't afford to buy you a diamond ring."

She seemed shocked when I said that.

I took her hands from my cheeks and held it in my hands.

"I work as a photographer and… was recently been demoted."

"I took trains and buses every day because I don't have a car."

"I borrow Yena's clothes to attend parties because I don't even have a nice dress."

"Eunbi, why are you saying all this?" She asked, uncomfortable.

"If Irene is a Titanic, then I'm just a small fisherman’s boat.. no, maybe just a raft." I continued, ignoring her question.

"I don't have anything fancy to offer you, but… there is one thing that doesn't cost money I can give."

"My love."

"Too bad there are no tools in this world that could measure how great is my love for you." I said with a chuckle.

"If it could be measured in money then you are the richest person in this world. If it could be measured with time then… it's more than forever."

I looked at her as tears were b in her eyes. I held her hands tightly as if she would disappear if I let go.

"Eunbi, I love you," she said.

I forced a smile, "But I'm not the only one you love."

She gulped.

"And it's not fair for me," I added.

I looked down and stared at our hands as if it's the last time we will ever hold hands.

 

Slowly, I let it go.


She was shocked when I let go of her hands and took a step away from her.

"Eunbi, I-I just need some time to sort out my feelings. You know that I'm not playing with your emotions," she said desperately.

"Eunbi, I really mean it when I said I love you," she added.

I nodded, “I know.”

"But, who do you truly love?" I asked.
She looked at me, unable to answer.

"That's why I've decided to give you all the time you need to think and sort out everything."
 

"Eunbi.."

I nodded and mustered every ounce of energy in me to say it.

"Kkura, let's stop seeing each other."

It was so hard saying those words, I felt like I just let go of a part of myself.

I looked at her, expecting a response but to my surprise she just kept mum. She agreed.

Suddenly, it felt hard to breathe.

She looked down and tears rolled down her cheeks.

My heart sunk seeing her shedding tears. It's too painful as if my heart was being torn apart into pieces.

I turned around, unable to watch it any longer.
 

"If it's me in your heart… you can come back anytime."
 

"Come back to this person who truly loves you."

"I will be waiting for you."

"Always."

I lift my foot one by one, making my steps to the door. It felt so hard to move, to leave her side.


I was hoping that she would stop me.

Yell at me and tell me how stupid I am.

Embrace me from behind and don't let me