Jinki couldn't sleep at all. 

It had been the third straight night of being intimate with Kibum and he was starting to worry that the younger man would grow accustomed to falling asleep in his arms. The younger man seemed so content snuggling up to his chest and almost didn't move the entire night. Jinki wasn't really comfortable with this setup but it was better than having Kibum whine at him for making him transfer to his own bed in the middle of the night.  

The older man thought that he could get Taemin out of his mind but as each day passed, the memory of him only grew stronger. The thing that got him the most was that smile... That sweet smile that made him feel like he was more than just a piece of garbage on the side of the road. He really couldn't explain how Taemin could give him a brand new lease on life with such a small gesture. It was almost wearing him down, starting to make him believe that he could have so much more than what he had. 

Now that he was finally feeling better, he lies awake thinking of his options. Hornet was about to give him a big job--one that paid even more than the one he just got stabbed for. It would allow them the chance to move out of this dump and have the semblance of a better life. He liked the idea of having more, but he also hated what he would have to give up in return. 

Joining The Nest for this job meant no turning back. He would forever be beholden to a life in the shadows and on the run, but at the same time, the promise of exacting revenge was also becoming more and more attractive as the days went by.

The older man knew well that Kibum was doing everything in his power to distract him from what he had been planning to do but Jinki knew that there was only one thing that could get him to change his mind. 

Taemin's smile sparked something inside of him that made him long for something more.

Jinki carefully gets up from Kibum's embrace and walked to the shower. 

He had to see him one more time.

*****

The next shift at work was awkward, to say the least.

Minho had been extra attentive to Taemin, seeming to get him anything and everything he needed--sometimes even before asking for it. The young man had to admit that it was nice to have someone take care of him like that. He felt important to Minho, which he absolutely was. But at the same time, he was nagged by the feeling that he was deceiving him. He had fun that night but no matter how he tried to convince himself, that was all it was. There really wasn't a reason to take it further.

The problem was, the older man was on cloud nine. Minho thought that that night they spent together would never come, and that it happening was some sort of sign. Jonghyun had always warned him to keep a part for himself because Taemin didn't seem to feel the same way that he did. But after last night, Minho was convinced that there was something there. Taemin had finally given him a green light, and Minho was certainly going to give it his best try.

"Can I take you home?" the older man asks, as Taemin prepares his bag to leave.

The younger man tries to ignore his requests for as long as he can, but Minho kept standing there and staring at him. He exhales loudly as he turns to him to answer.

"I can go home on my own. Thanks," he replies, taking his bag and heading out the door.

The young man quickly files out of the station with Minho right behind him. "Taemin. Hold on," he says, tapping the young man's shoulder to turn him around. "Why are you avoiding me? The other night... I just thought..."

"I'm really tired... I'm not up for round two right now."

"That's not what I meant," he says, growing increasingly frustrated. "We never got to talk about it. I just wanted to talk."

Taemin turns to completely face the older man, with an exasperated look on his face. "Okay... What is it?"

"N-Now?" Minho says, looking around at the empty street. "Okay... Taemin... It really meant something to me," he says. The look he had on his face made Taemin feel like he was the worst person in the world. There was so much hope in Minho's eyes and he hated himself for having to be the one to crush it. 

"Look, hyung... It was fun, but..." 

"But..." Minho whispers, running his hands through his hair. This really wasn't going as well as he had hoped. His heart was breaking into a million pieces at the rejection he was receiving. He takes a deep breath and closes his eyes. Taemin could feel the hurt radiate off him. "Why do I keep doing this to myself?"

The younger man hated hurting Minho this way, but he felt like his hands were tied. The realization of just how much pain he is causing his friend makes Taemin sick to his stomach. Maybe he really has become this monster who just used people and threw them to the side.

"I'm sorry, I really am--" Taemin stops as a familiar silhouette catches his eye. In a heartbeat, he realizes who is waiting for him just outside the door of the station. 

Jinki.

The older man stands there, leaning on a tree and dragging on a cigarette. He was watching the two with an intense glare in his eye, not even minding that he was interrupting such a sensitive moment. He flicks the stick away with his wrist and stands upright to call attention to himself. 

Minho notices too and stops dead in his tracks. His heart falls to his stomach as he realizes that Jinki is vying for the same thing he was. 

Taemin looks back at Minho and sees how much Jinki's being there is affecting him. "Is this why, Taemin? Is he the reason?"

The young man doesn't know how to answer. He was as surprised as Minho was, but he couldn't deny that seeing Jinki standing there made his heart skip a beat. Taemin throws Jinki a soft look that Minho doesn't recognize. It broke his heart to see with his own two eyes that Taemin was indeed capable of affection--just not for him.

He walks away without another word, leaving the young man standing there feeling like a complete jerk. Even if he wanted to run after his friend, he wouldn't even know what to say. Taemin decides to let him walk away. He'd deal with Minho later. Right now, his attention is captured by the man waiting in front of him. 

He looked gorgeous standing there under the morning sunlight. 

Jinki steps forward, never breaking his stare. 

"A-are you okay? Are you healing well? I can take you inside if you need help with anything," Taemin says, almost intimidated by the older man's strong presence. There was a look in his eye that made him feel like he was on a mission.

"I came to see you," he says.

Taemin standing there, looking at him was the thing that Jinki needed the most. Standing before Taemin like this made him feel like he could be a better man--better than what he was now. Better than this shell of a person who only lived for money and revenge. 

He turns to walk away and throws his hopes into the wind. He knew it more now than he did five seconds ago. Despite everything that he is feeling in this moment, Taemin was too good for him. 

"W-wait," the younger man says, stepping closer to him. "Your name... I've been thinking about your name since the last time you were here. It's beautiful. Thank you for telling me."

"You've been thinking about me?"

Taemin looks down on the pavement, embarrased that he may have let on a bit too much. There was no point in hiding it now.

"I have," he answers, still too scared to look Jinki in the eye.

"So have I."

*****

Minho rushes back to the station in a huff. He is suddenly ransacking his things, looking for the one thing that could save Taemin from that man. 

All this time, he had thought that Taemin just wasn't interested in him. He could stand the cold shoulders and the brush-offs if it were just as simple as that. To realize that Taemin was being lured by someone else was a whole different thing altogether. He couldn't stand the thought of the love of his life being in someone else's arms, let alone that person being somebody like Jinki. 

"What's wrong, man?" Jonghyun asks, a look of concern washing over his face. Minho ignores him and continues to throw his things around all over the room. "Hey. Talk to me. What's wrong?"

"He's not good enough," he says, through his clenched jaw. "He's not good enough for Taemin."

Jonghyun is confused and looks around at the mess he is making. "Minho, who's not good enough?"

"Onew, or whatever the hell his name is!" Minho finally finds what he is looking for and opens his phone.

If there was anyone that had the right to be with Taemin, it was definitely him. He was an upstanding citizen with a successful career. He could provide the young man with a stable home, and not to mention--he was completely in love for a long time. No one knows Taemin like he does. They were supposed to be the perfect match.

"Taemin is supposed to be with me."

He finds what he is looking for: the directions to Jinki's home. 

*****

Kibum is roused by the bright sunlight hitting his eyes. He sleepily drags his arm around the bed to look for Jinki but he finds that he is alone. He had no way of telling where Jinki had run off to, but the younger man thinks nothing of it. He was just probably out buying another pack of cigarettes. He moves away from the sunlight and tries to fall back asleep, eager for some rest.

The past couple of days had been rough on him. 

Jinki had been keen on making it up to him and of course the young man was glad to give in. It had been a long time since Jinki had shown that much interest in him, and it gave Kibum a lot of hope. Maybe Jinki had finally snapped out of it and realized what they had was something special. 

He falls back asleep with a smile on his face, comforted by the thought of being finally being loved in return--when he hears an urgent knock on the door. 

"Just a second," he says, his voice still raspy. The young man stumbles out of bed as he puts his boxers back on. "Did you forget your key again? Jinki, what am I going to do with you? I already put it by the door so you won't forget but you still do."

He opens the door wide open and is surprised by the person standing on the other side of it. "You're not Jinki."

"Can I talk to you?"

It was Minho, and he looked like hell. The younger man didn't even wait for an invitation to come inside as he barged through the door. 

"What are you doing here, Minho?" Key says, annoyed at the intrusion.

The paramedic wastes no time in letting Key in on what was happening. "He's not here, right?"

"No he isn't, Sherlock," Key says, becoming more and more worried.

"Then you won't care when I tell you that he was at the station, waiting for Taemin?"

The older man scoffs as he heads back to the door to show Minho the way out. "Don't be ridiculous. You don't know him like I do. He waits for no one. You and I both just need some sleep, so if you don't mind..." 

"Okay. If you don't believe me, then where is he now?"

Kibum falters as he hates to admit that he really doesn't have the slightest idea where Jinki could be. "He's probably buying beer and cigarettes. Minho, really. I'm too tired for this crap..."

"He was at the station. He and Taemin left together. They're together now." 

All the color drains from Kibum's face as he realizes that Minho is being completely serious. 

"Stop being so naive, Key. I know you see it too," Minho says, the defeat in his voice scaring Kibum. "Help me," he says. "Help me, or I guarantee you we will lose them both."

*****

"This is it," Taemin says as he opens the door to his apartment. It felt strange to bring someone he barely knew back to his place but then again, there was something completely different about Jinki. He had every reason to be afraid but Taemin felt safe in his presence. 

"Come in... I wasn't really expecting company." The young man was hurriedly trying to tidy up as he walked along the room, being slowly followed in by Jinki.

He stared at the many pictures on the wall of what he assumed were friends and family. It made him smile to have suddenly have access into Taemin's world, when a few moments ago, all he knew about him was his disarming smile. 

"These are cute..." he says, holding up a picture of Taemin and his Dad at graduation. 

A blush comes over the young man's face as he suddenly becomes shy. "Thanks..."  

Taemin clears his throat and sets his bag down on the couch. "I don't have much else to offer besides water..." 

"It's fine," Jinki says, inching closer to him, not diverting his gaze away from the young man. 

Taemin could feel his breath hitch in his throat as Jinki moved dangerously close to him. He could feel the warmth from Jinki's body on his as their lips connected in a passionate kiss.  

It was nothing like either of them felt before. Jinki's lips were like soft pillows and faintly tasted of cigarettes and lollipops--a flavor that Taemin didn't know he would enjoy so much. The way the older man would move his tongue on his made Taemin's knees quiver. Soon, their arms were tangled in an embrace and their hands were roaming hungrily across each other's bodies. 

"What are we doing?" Taemin asks, as he pries himself away from Jinki, panting.

"I just really wanted to see you."