"Good morning, Minh--" Jonghyun says, stopping abruptly as he turns to see that his best friend isn't alone coming into the station. 

"Hey, Jonghyun..." Kibum says, with his head bowed down, giving a shy greeting. 

"H-Hey Kibum..." The oldest man looks at the both of them, completely confused at why they would even be together in the first place.

"So," Minho says, clearing his throat. "I'll be here for a while for my shift, so you can hang out at the apartment on your own tonight. No drinking, no partying, no drugs. The shop I was telling you about is a couple of blocks that way. Just tell them I referred you, and you'll be sure to get the job."

"Are you sure about that?" Kibum says with a twinge of sassiness that Minho has learned to accept. 

"You might be surprised to learn how much people love me around these parts. Go before I change my mind," he replies, with a still stunned Jonghyun listening closely.

"Okay, okay... Don't get your twisted... Bye, Jonghyun! See you around," Kibum says as he turns with a swish and wiggles his fingers to wave goodbye. He disappears as quickly as he came, and Minho strangely goes about his business as if absolutely nothing was wrong. 

"So are you not even going to tell me what the hell that was?" Jonghyun says, his arms folded across his chest. 

The young man walks toward the kitchen and sets his bag down, without a care in the world. "What are you talking about?" Minho asks, smirking to himself as he bends down in front of the refrigerator to get a drink of water. 

"Are you two forming some sort of alliance to break Jinki and Taemin up or something?" the older man asks.

"Maybe... That's a pretty good idea, actually... Too bad you weren't the first one to think of it," Minho replies, as he takes a huge gulp of water. 

Jonghyun stares at him as he finishes the entire bottle. He didn't intend to not have his two cents be heard on this very delicate matter that his friend had gotten himself into.

"Look," he says sternly. "It's not any of my business once again, but I feel obligated to tell you that this isn't a good idea. Is he living with you, Minho?"

"So what if he is?" the younger man asks, throwing the empty water bottle in the recycling bin. 

Jonghyun rubs his hands over his eyebrows and lets out a long sigh. "Minho... This is the ex-boyfriend of the guy that you are in competition with for Taemin... I'm not even going to mention that this guy is a hardened criminal. What the hell are you doing?" 

If he was being completely honest, he didn't know either. To other people, it would seem like he was doing a good deed for someone who was down on their luck--and to an extent, he was. It's just that he can't help but enjoy the feeling that he was somehow getting back at Jinki for helping Kibum. 

Minho grabs his bag from the kitchen chair and winks at his friend. "Trust me, okay? This is gonna be fine... It's going to be great."

*****

It was one of those days again. He couldn't bring himself to show up for work today, so he called in sick. Jonghyun didn't believe him for one second, but he was sure the elder understood that he needed just a bit of time for himself. 

Ever since he met Jinki, Taemin's mind has been going in circles. He couldn't stop thinking about the older man's soft blonde hair, his piercing eyes, his soft touch... But he also knew very well that everything about Jinki was totally wrong for him. Somehow the older man had gotten under his skin. Never mind that he was hurting someone he really cared about... No matter how much he wanted to be considerate to Minho, he just couldn't do much to keep himself from Jinki. There was just something that pulled them together--something that he couldn't quite explain. 

He found himself thinking more and more about the night that they spent together... About the long silences that went on between them that seemed to tell him everything he needed to know. He thought about his eyes, and his arms and his smile. In that moment, all the world seemed to fade away and everything about the two of them felt so right. All he could think about was Jinki. Lee Jinki. No. He couldn't.

The relentless thoughts were almost suffocating him. He had to get out. Fresh air probably wouldn't really help but it was definitely better than sticking around and feeling Jinki all around him. He grabs his coat and begins to head out when he is startled by a figure at his doorway.

"I'm glad you're home," Jinki says, his deep voice sending shivers down Taemin's spine. 

"Jinki... What are you doing he--" Taemin says, as he is cut off by the older man's hands grabbing his face and planting an aggressive kiss on him. 

It was next to impossible to keep himself from melting into Jinki's arms. The kiss was everything that he had been craving for so desperately. But all the thoughts hadn't stopped swirling around his head. The elation wasn't enough to make him forget about the conflicted feelings he had about this man. He knew that it would be almost torture to pry himself from the older man's grasp, but he willed himself to do so. Taemin gathered all his strength and pushed Jinki away. "Stop!" he exclaims, wiping the side of his mouth and taking a few steps back.

Jinki is stunned by the younger man's reaction. He was sure that Taemin felt the same; he could feel it so strongly. The older man was certain that this was what they both wanted. So, why? The few feet between them that Taemin created seemed like miles and it threw Jinki off. There is nothing he can think of to say as he looks at a shaken Taemin before him. 

"I'm sorry..." Taemin says, trying to catch his breath. "You... You just caught me off-guard, that's all... Come in, let's just go inside..."

Taemin turns to open his door as Jinki stands frozen in the hallway, carefully watching the young man's every move. He felt the shift in the young man's behavior. He didn't have to be told... Taemin was assessing their situation and it scared him more than anything else in his life. Jinki starts to shake at the realization that he just might lose Taemin too. 

The young man looks back at him and Jinki snaps out of his daze, walking slowly into Taemin's apartment. 

"Do you want anything? Tea or..." he asks, trying to focus his mind on being a gracious host, if nothing else. 

The sight of the young man in front of him, being nothing less than perfect, was too much for him to bear. 

"I'm fine..." Jinki says, his voice cracking. The older man feels himself breaking down, as a wave of emotions overcomes him. All the hurt of his lonely life, and the crimes he had committed had finally caught up with him. He thinks about the way that he so heartlessly treated a loyal friend... The way that he thought he could just take a pure young man into his dark life, purely because he wanted to. The despair of his existence suddenly made its presence felt in one fell swoop. Jinki crumbles to the floor and buries his head in his hands, unable to control the gutteral sobs that were coming from his mouth. 

Taemin watches in horror as the man that he had grown to know as strong and steely was crying on his living room floor like a wilted flower. Without a second thought, he gets down on his knees and takes Jinki into his arms. "Hey... Shh... It's okay," he coos. Jinki immediately grabs on and sobs into his shirt.

"You shouldn't... You shouldn't..." Jinki says, breathlessly. "You should stay away from me."

The words shook Taemin to his core. "Well, I try... Don't you try, too?"

"I try, but I can't... I can't stay away," Jinki says, his tear-stained face looking up at Taemin. 

For the first time, the young man looks into Jinki's eyes and saw something that he had never been allowed to see before: Vulnerability. 

"I have to get out of here," Jinki says, standing up abruptly. "I'm sorry."

"Wait!" Taemin says, doing his best to catch up to him. There was no way that he would let the older man go in this state. "Please wait, Jinki... Don't go."

"I have to get out of here..." Jinki says, trying to pull himself together as he walked to the door. "I'll ruin you."

*****

Everything that he had done couldn't leave him. It made him sick to his stomach. The only way for him to remain sane was to let go of everything that reminded him of who he really was.

He waited outside until every member of The Nest came out of the building for the night's assignment, leaving his boss alone in the room upstairs. When he was sure that the coast was clear, he hurried up the steps and knocked on the door of the apartment that he had been to only a few times before. 

"Onew!" Hornet exclaims, opening his arms to welcome the young man. Jinki didn't return his enthusiasm, as always, and he ignores the gesture to push his boss aside. "What are you doing here, you've earned some time off."

Jinki shoves the bag filled with cash into Hornet's chest. "I don't want this," he says with conviction dripping from his voice.

The older man had a perplexed look on his face and stared at the cold way that Jinki was staring him down. He chuckles, not really understanding what was going on. "What?"

"I don't want your money," he says, with his jaw clenched. Every emotion comes spilling out of him as he realizes in that instant that his need for revenge had been misplaced. Heechul wasn't the problem... It was Hornet. Jinki balls his hand into a fist as the anger rises up in his chest.

"What are you talking about, son? You earned this," Hornet chuckles, handing the bag back to the young man. The look in Jinki's eye scared him, and he tried to remember if he remembered to pack any weapons onto himself this morning. 

Jinki remains unmoving, letting the bag hang in the air and not breaking his intense stare. Hornet was the reason for everything that was happening in his life, and he fully intended to have his revenge. He takes a step toward the older man as he watches a drop of sweat fall from his brow.

"Onew... Son... What is this about, huh? Let's talk about this," Hornet says, stumbling backwards and clutching the bag of cash to his chest. 

"I'm not your son," Jinki growls, taking one step closer. He could see the fear come up in Hornet's eyes and he was intoxicated by it.

Thoughts of Jinki's life before he was used and played by this hardened criminal flooded him in this instant. Because of this man, Jinki had been stabbed and left to die... He was used and taken advantage of... He had lost his best friend... All because of the man in front of him. He reaches into his pocket and grasps the cold handle of the knife that he had brought with him. The world around him starts to grow dark and all he can see is the misery that this man had caused upon his life, and how Jinki finally had the upper hand. 

The Hornet looks around the apartment with panic, realizing too late that he was alone. "Onew... Hey... Buddy... We're good, right? Isn't this enough? I can get you more... Onew..."

Nothing that the old man could say would make the young man snap out of his rage. His takes the knife out of his pocket and the blade shines in moonlight. The fear in Hornet's face turns into terror as he fumbles with the bag and saunters backwards, deeper into the apartment. There was nowhere else to go. 

"O-Onew... P-Please... I can give you anything you want! What do you want, huh? Do you want your own crew? I can make them work for you. Do you want a cut from every job? I can arrange that for you... Let's be reasonable about this..." The Hornet says, with every confidence disappearing from his shaking body. 

Jinki lunges towards him and pins him to the wall by shoving his forearm into the older man's throat, gurgling noises coming out of his mouth almost instantly. The young man's knife grazes Hornet's neck and Jinki was filled by a surge of power.

At that exact moment, he saw Taemin's face in his mind's eye. The way that the young man so tenderly looked at him, as if he was the most perfect man in the world. He remembers the way Taemin made him feel like he could be more than he actually was. For a brief moment, he was able to believe that he was a good man, incapable of what he was about to do. 

Jinki drops the knife to the floor and lets go of Hornet, who immediately falls down to the floor, wheezing. The young man runs out the door and into the night, his heart beating out of his chest. 

Cold beads of sweat fell down his back, as his hands shook inside his jacket pocket. He couldn't believe that he almost became exactly like the men that he hated with a passion.

He ran like a madman to the one place that made him feel safe.

*****

Taemin was worried sick about Jinki, but he had no way of finding out if he was okay. He cursed himself for letting him leave like that. Maybe he should have run after him... Maybe he should have asked help from his friends. He would never forgive himself if something happened to Jinki. 

"It's my fault..." he whispers to himself, tears coming to his eyes. "I shouldn't have pushed him away. It's all my fault."

The young man jumps out of the couch as he hears a frantic knock on his door. He was relieved to find a panting Jinki on the other side, sweating profusely and looking absolutely spent. 

"J-Jinki... Thank God you're here..." Taemin says, a deeply concerned look on his face. 

"I almost killed a man... But you saved me, Taemin... You saved me..."