Day 12 (May 1st 2011)

Father... I'm sorry you had to wait so long. Becoming an idol is such a stressful life, but this is the life I choose for myself! There's a lot of things I don't understand but I think that's a good thing... I want to finally understand all the things you've taught me all these times. But as of right now, I know there's still more work I can do to improve myself!

The little box I was once stuck inside of, I'm finally outside, I can see the world with my own two eyes. I never thought the day would come where I'd be set free from this curse. Where the days never change, where everything that existed stayed the same the next day. The door that finally appeared for me to walk through and set out to a new tomorrow. It all changed because of the words you said to me that one night father. But those words I will not write, I keep them deep inside for me to remember whenever I show weakness.

Did you know? That there's a lot of people that love me and APink! They come out to the airport to see us off to our music video shoot and give us words of praise and presents. Sometimes I feel like our fans love me more than I love myself. I wonder if I can really become the idol that they will love and look up to... Hehe I can already imagine you hitting me on the back of my head for saying something stupid like that. Of course I can become the idol everyone will look up to. Thank you for always reassuring me father.

Even though the everlasting workload we have as a new girl group, I can't help but find it fun. Doing the things I never  thought was ever possible being stuck in that little box. The world seems so much bigger now, the never ending things I can expereince while stepping outside my comfort zone. The many dances and lyrics I will be practicing over the course of my lifetime. These are my presents to the world, and hopefully someone out there will appreciate them as much as I do.

Unfortunately, I won't be able to write another log for quite some time after this one, these next few weeks will consist of performances of our debut songs and photoshoots of brands we are modeling for. But you understand that it's only natural that an idol like myself will be super busy right father? Haha I know your answer already, no need to say it.

But the next time I write, there's something I want to tell you about father, I haven't told anybody else about it either! 

There's this girl...

But, until next time.