By 7AM, I found myself very much awake already. I was excited to go around this town so I swiftly took a bath and prepared myself. I ate breakfast then went out to explore the streets of Kranj. Every city I’ve been to offers a different feel from each other so I enjoy each very much. “This street is so pretty,” I say at every road I pass by. I probably sound like a broken record by now. By 9AM, I decide to take a small break when I saw a nearby café.

I found a familiar back while walking towards it. Is it who I think it is? What are the odds? I approach the café with tentative steps. It really is Seulgi. “Hey. We keep running to each other since the other day,” I try to sound nonchalant as I take a seat in front of her.

“Oh! Unnie!” Seulgi says as she waves at the me. After meeting in Piran the other day, we shared stories with each other such as our ages. Turns out I’m 3 years older than the other girl. She told me I look young though. I kind of enjoy compliments like that.

We rested a bit then we decided to walk around town. We took pictures of each other before settling near the fountain in Kranj Square to start our drawing session. Yes, she’s also a drawing enthusiast. I was surprised to see her drawing beside me when we were in Piran.

While sketching, we asked bits of information about each other. Unlike me who’s just fond of drawing, Seulgi actually does it for a living. She sketches, paints, and also does freelance online graphic design works which explains how she can travel from one place to another at the same time. “A Wandering Artist” she says is her official job title to which I laughed at. Art has always been her passion and she couldn’t see herself doing anything else.

“It must be nice to do something you want to do,” I say to myself.

I thought about my situation. For the past few years, I chased dreams that aren’t even mine and it all went to naught. It frustrates me more that I didn’t even get a bit of recognition from my Father. I think I would’ve been happy with even just a single compliment but how could there be nothing? My heart clenches at the thought.

“You’re doing great.” I look at Seulgi. “You draw well,” She added with a smile on her face. I blink then focused on the page I’m working on. I wonder how could a person I met only a few days ago say something I long to hear for years from someone I held so dear. I’m getting emotional over a simple situation.

“Ah,” I say as tears start to formulate on my eyes. I turn to other way pretending to look around as I try to blink away the tears. The way she said it just sounded so sincere I can’t help but feel this way. Will I hear these words from my Father someday?

“Thank you.” I add in a voice barely above a whisper.

-

“Drunken Seulgi!” I tease the obviously tipsy girl as we make our way through the vineyard.

After we met in Kranj, Seulgi told me about her plans to go to a nearby winery and asked me if I want to tag along. I don’t exactly have any plans on where to go next so I instantly accepted. That is an addition to the fact that I enjoy her company too.

Upon our arrival, we were welcomed by the owner, Jean, and were immediately brought to the cellar where we got to taste different kinds of wine. After the wine tasting session, it came off as a surprise for me to find out that Seulgi is a lightweight.

I’m now assisting (and teasing) the drunk girl as of the moment. I find taking care of drunk people bothersome but that doesn’t seem to apply to Seulgi. Turns out, this girl is such a delightful drunk. She oozes aegyo and does a lot of funny antics.

Not too long ago, I found her sitting at the side of the road and scolding a random cat she calls “Kang Nabi” with her slurred speech. The cat was shedding furs and it got on Seulgi’s sleeves. As if sitting on the side of the road wasn’t enough, she just had to lie down next to it as well while patting the cat. A grandma passed by and called the pet “Amanda”. Seulgi, in her purest voice, repeated the name with adoration. I squealed for a bit. How can she be just as adorable as the cat?

After that, I was taking a selfie when Seulgi zooms at my back in an attempt to be included in the frame of the photo. An attempt that obviously failed because, instead, she slips and landed first on the ground. I kept laughing at the drunk girl. “Why are you laughing? I did that on purpose!” The girl pouted. Look at her making lame excuses. I continued laughing until my stomach hurts.

The tour ended after an hour. “If you go up the church there, you can see a great view overlooking the vineyard.” Jean said as he bid temporary goodbye to us two. This sparked the interest in Seulgi who started to jump like a child. “Let’s go there!! Last one to arrive will treat dinner!” She shouted as she dashes up to the hill leaving me behind. I shake my head. I’m too old for this.

Mid-way to the hill, I found Seulgi slowing down due to her depleted energy and drowsiness. I laugh as I approach the still tipsy girl and assisted her as we make our way towards the church. Holding her in my arms, I think I wouldn’t mind taking care of her every day. I sighed. These thoughts.

To be honest, I’m not really surprised to find myself getting attracted to a female in general. I would like to think that it has something to do with my Father. He kept insisting on the power of men which made me drawn to the opposite gender unknowingly. Or maybe that’s just me making up excuses and that Seulgi is simply just hella attractive and adorable my heart made an exception for her. After all, I never got attracted to any girl before her. I’ve had a number of boyfriends which I did like at some point in time.

It’s not like I will do something about this too because, one, it’s just a small crush and, two, this is something not in the norm of both my family and the Korean society and, three, I’m uptight as hell so I’m sure I will most definitely not stray with the expectations of me.

Upon our arrival on top of the hill, we were immediately met with a splendid view. The rows of the vineyard seemed everlasting. It was huge and undeniably beautiful. The colors of the sky were overwhelming. We hurriedly sat down. I took my pad and immediately started sketching.

I stopped when I felt a weight on my right shoulder. “I still feel dizzy.” I look at Seulgi whose eyes are closed and her head leaning on my shoulders. I looked down and she hasn’t sketched anything. My gaze went back to her face. There’s a certain charm to it that you can’t help but keep looking. I sighed. I’m such a creep. I should really get over my crush towards her. It will not do my heart any good.

I resumed my drawing despite my racing heartbeat. After some time, Seulgi withdraws and sits correctly. This prompted me to release a breath I didn’t know I was holding.

I looked at Seulgi after finishing my sketch and found her looking at my direction. It must be because the view behind me is also quite eye-catching. If I didn’t know better, I would’ve thought she was looking at me. In the back of my mind, I hope she does.

“It’s beautiful.” Seulgi says as she shifts her view to the front. By this time, the sun was setting, and it amplified all the colors around us. However, instead of the view, I found myself looking at the side profile of Seulgi. Then, I looked at her eyes, her nose…her lips.

I gulped.

“It is.”

-

I sat by the chair beside the window of my hotel room. I have just finished talking to my Dad who demanded me to go back already which ended in another round of arguments. Eventually, I have to go but not this soon. I take my sketchpad and count the remaining pages.

Thirty-three.