I just don't understand. Why does my brother like this guy? What's so special about him? He's so...normal. Not just in personality, but, like, in the way he looks too.

He’s scrawny, for one. He looks like he’d break faster than a stick. He’s always wearing a blue and black raglan shirt, all different ones, like he has a collection or something. And he has these huge creepy round grey eyes, like concrete. It’s weird. When he stares at Tadashi it’s like he’s seen a ghost. Their the same height, I think, despite his long lanky legs.

You know what? It's not that he's unattractive, but he's…just ordinary. His personality is too regular, too..Tadashi-ey

Seriously, what could he have possibly said to make Tadashi smile like that?

    A quirk is at his lips, his grey eyes are bright as he looked at my brother, and my brother, the idiot, is grinning back at him, rocking back into a sit. They’re in the courtyard of SFIT, sitting on the grass, supposedly studying, but it looks to me like they’re just staring at each other with disgusting romanticism.

But if you didn't know they were dating, it probably would've looked like two normal friends having a fun time studying in the courtyard of their college together, enjoying off time and eating lunch.

No.

    Those two were supposedly in love, having dated for two years without letting a brother know, while everyone else at the school knew it like it was on the news! But what got to me the most is that Tadashi didn't even tell me, his own brother!  He's been yakking it up with some random guy for more than a year, and I only heard about him two weeks ago!

    Tadashi tells me everything! We don't keep secrets from each other! At least, I thought we didn't. And then he had the nerve to tell me It wasn't a secret, I just didn't think you'd be interested in it.

    Well duh!! But I still want to know!

    I don't like the guy, and I don't trust him. I don't like the way he smiles, or how his eyes glint while looking at my brother, or he’s so careful turning the pages of his textbook on his lap, while he takes up Tadashi's time ‘studying’ out in the bright blue and cloudless sky.

    And I certainly don't like those uxorious gazes Tadashi gives him when he's not looking.

🎍🎍🎍

    As soon as Tadashi walked into our shared bedroom with that guy following behind him, I walked out. I couldn't stand being in the same room as them now that I could notice every friendly banter for what it truly was: geeky flirting.

But I had nowhere to go, so I just stood against the wall in the hall, and since the walls were thin, I could still hear a lot of what they were saying and no, I definitely didn't listen because I was curious. I had nowhere else to go and they were too loud for me to ignore. I’m not gonna leave my own house just to avoid them.

The guy's deep voice bounced over the walls, out of the door, and into my eardrums, like a monster struck was starting on the other side. It startled me at first how much bass was in the older man’s voice. It was reminiscent of a drum. I don't know where he’s from but his voice doesn't really match his face. He seems like the kinda lanky nerd that would be picked on a lot in cartoons, but without the glasses, and a voice as deep as a abyss and as loud as a jet.

Although, he seemed to carry himself with an edge of politeness. He sat with his back straight, I noticed, and he dressed a bit like Tadashi when he wasn’t wearing that raglan shirt, which wasn't too weird, since Tadashi didn't wear anything extravagant. Of course, that didn't stop girls from fawning over him anyway(and apparently males too). Aside from his “five-star” personality and ability to up to everyone, his kindness got him surrounded by dozens of people.

    Unfortunately one of those people actually had a shot.

One of those people happened to have a shot that has lasted two years.

Seriously, forget this guy.

"You're going on another zip-lining trip?" Tadashi's voice asked from the other side of the wall.

"Yeah, and I'm inviting you." the other guy replied with a cocky voice.

"Huh..what are you trying to do? Get me alone in the woods so you can kill me and bury the body?"

He laughed.“That's not the reason I'm trying to get you alone,"

I almost threw up in my mouth, rolling my eyes and scowling through the door, wishing that if I glared hard enough then he would feel a hole burn right through the brown, almost red if you squint, locks of hair shrouding his forehead.

I could hear them laughing through the door.

"No, but, seriously, who else are you inviting?" Tadashi asked. I imagined him crossing his arms, like he had a habit of doing while standing over people.

"I asked Gogo if she wanted to come. She hasn't given me an answer yet. I think she still has a lot more ideas for her bike to finish up.." I scoffed, but this time it was at the prospect that the woman would ever be happy with the speed of her bike. "But..you know.." I focused on the conversation at hand. "you could always invite Hiro, if you wanted to."

My eyebrows went up at that. Me?

"Hiro?" Tadashi asked, with the same amount of curiosity and disbelief I was feeling at the moment. "What made you think of inviting him?"

"Ah, I don't know.." He said flippantly."It's just that he's really trying hard on his project and whether he gets in or not, a trip to celebrate or relax would be cool for him, you think?"

"Yeah...? I'll ask him, but I don't think he's into the whole 'zip-lining' thing."

"I don't think it's the zip-lining he'd dislike though..." He mumbled so low I almost didn't hear it.

"What do you mean?" I put my head to the door.

"I mean..don't you think..” the man paused. “He doesn't really hang out with me, and I don't think he..is comfortable when I'm around."

"What? You think he doesn't like you?"

"I know he doesn't like me.” True.

"No way, what makes you think that?”

How about the fact that I don't talk to him, I don't look at him, I leave whenever I see him coming, and I glare at him from afar?

There was no sound coming from the room.

“Ok, fine. But I still think your being paranoid.”

“He's your brother! Shouldn't you know him well? How do you not notice it?” Cause he's always looking at you, smarta-

“I do know him, that's why I'm saying he wouldn't just judge someone without getting to- oh wait..”

Yeah…

“Yeah..” He said quietly in a 'like I said' type of voice.

So you finally realized.

"Maybe we should just-.. Ah..." Tadashi sighed and I could imagine him rubbing his face to control his emotions. “Maybe we should just continue studying.”

It was mostly silent after that, aside from some more banter and flirting.

In the end, Tadashi still asked me after he left. I said no.

“Oh come on, little brother! It'll be fun!”

“What is “fun” to you isn't “fun” to me."

“It's just for a weekend,” he said. “And sense, you need a break every once in awhile!”

“And since when do you go 'zip-lining'?” I asked, eyebrows furrowed up.

He hesitated. “Mn took me once a little more than a year ago...?” He said, hand on the back of his head and a sheepish grin on his face contradicting his furrowed eyebrows.

I crossed my arms and turned around some more in my chair, facing him fully.

He sighed and sat in another chair next to me, scratching the back of his head. He looked up at me tiredly and put his hands in his lap, leaning towards me.

“Okay, what's wrong?” He asked it more as a statement than a question.

I made a sound.

“What's wrong with him?” He asked again, eyebrows arched up and eyes lidded. He sounded as if he was about to give me a lecture, as if he wasn't mad but he wants me to know that what I’ve done is wrong. “Why don't you like him?”

“I have no idea what you're talking about.” If he wasn't going to tell me until two years later what was going on, then I'm not going to tell him what is so obviously wrong with his boyfriend.

    He sighed again and rubbed his face with his hands. I raised my eyebrows at him and tapped my index finger on my forearm. It was silent for a few moments and he looked at me again with a even more tired look and with his hand on his cheek. His hands made a slapping sound as he let them fall back to his lap.

“Okay... Okay.” He said, tilting his head and lifting his hands in surrender, eyes closed for a second as he sat up in his seat. “I get it,” he said. “I'm sorry I didn't tell you about my boyfriend,”

I looked away for a quick second to fake vomit. He either didn't notice, or didn't say anything.

“But there's no reason for you to hate him for it. It was my choice." He said, eyes genuine as he looked at me. “I honestly didn't believe we could last this long, heck, even now I can't believe it-" Is he getting sentimental? Can I actually throw up so I can get him to stop talking? “but I really like him, Hiro! And I want you to like him too, so please..! Come with us, get to know him.”

I've never seen Tadashi look this desperate. Even when I was about to get beaten up by Yama and his gang, he’s always confident. His eyes are so wide and filled with hope and fear and honesty..

Crap, why was my big brother such a sentimental idiot?

    After a few more seconds of looking at him, I finally ask, “What's so good about him..?” My voice came out too low but I'm sure he heard it anyway. I avoid his gaze, didn't want to see his face. It didn't matter anyway, as soon as I asked I regretted it, almost as much as peeking back at him when he explained it.

“He's...he's wonderful, Hiro. He makes me feel wonderful. He cares. A lot.  And he's fun! He makes me laugh, and he's thoughtful,...and smart! He's loyal and trustworthy and he respects me and my decisions, and that's a lot to ask for in some relationships." He wasn't even looking at me, he seemed to be somewhere else entirely, and he was smiling that ridiculous smile again. His eyes were too bright to look at anymore, and I was glad when he ran another hand down his face to calm himself down.

“Ugh, Hiro, he just-..he's perfect for me, you know?"

“No. I don't know." I stood up, unable to look at him anymore.  I left the room and slammed the door behind me, ignoring him when he called out for me.

🎍🎍🎍

Love is..respect, trustworthiness, honesty..not having to worry because you know they are always beside you, whether it be family, friend, or significant other. Love is communication, patience, happiness. Love shouldn't be hard.

The plans got cancelled for that weekend. To make up for it, Tyrone Nial, the guy with two names and a obsession with my brother, invited Tadashi, a love struck intelligent fool(Can you be both?), on a date to the movies on Friday. His apparent 'soulmate' was going to pick him up and they'd leave for the night, and Tadashi would stay the night. At his house. The house of a boyfriend he's been with for two years.

I'm not stupid, ok? Of course there has been times when Tadashi doesn't come home. He's a college student. But mostly he's at the college itself, not at someone's house! And of course this is probably not their..first time (going over each others houses) but still, he didn't have to tell me his plans for Friday night. I don't need the imagery. It's their business.

Until, of course, the day comes and Tyrone Nial,( yes, you have to put both) comes up to our room and Tadashi, who had been aggravated since he got home, says-

“I'm sorry, I thought I texted you..! I can't go..I have to work on some stuff at SFIT, they're expecting me to be there in, like, thirty minutes and I have to go right now if I'm going to make it! They wouldn't let me refuse! I am so sorry!"

I heard him from my bed and saw, before I could turn away, Tadashi hug the guy and give him a quick peck to the lips before pulling away and grabbing his stuff off his bed on the far side of the room.

The man looked at me for a second as if to say “Did you see that?!” but he probably saw the face I was making at him ‘cause he shut his mouth right after, turning back to Tadashi who was making his way from his side of the room.

   His eyebrows rose and his mouth formed an O shape as he looked from me to him. “I know, why don't you take Hiro? He'd love that movie.” He says with a smile and a glance my way, and I know for a fact he saw the look of disgust on my face. He poked the grey-eyed man in the chest and winked as he began to go passed him. “You already paid for the tickets, just let him tag along!" He pecked his cheek and passed him into the door and out into the hallway. “It'll be fine! Don't get him into any trouble!”

“I won't!” He called back.

“I was talking to Hiro!” And with that, his stomps went silent as he hit ground floor and was out the door.

    It took a minute for Tyrone Nial to stop looking behind him down the hallway and turn his attention to me. But then again, who cares? I turn my back to him instead of scowling at him, closing my eyes and relaxing, hoping he'll soon figure it out and leave. “I'm not going.”

  With a nervous voice, he said, “We're..we were going to watch Electro-Beam."

  I moved onto my stomach before I could catch myself. "Did you just say Electro-Beam?"

   Tyrone Nial's surprised face caught me off guard and I returned to my original poker face

  Crap, I wasn't supposed to let him get to me..! But that movies series is so cool, and I've been waiting for months for it to come out! I mean, he's already got the tickets so why not? I'll just take the ticket and sit so far away from him that I can't see him. That'll work.

“Fine, I'll go.” I say clearly, resisting the urge to smirk at his surprised expression. “But, you have to sit on the other side of the room.”

Something flashes across his face but disappears before I can fully take in what it was. Was it just me or did he just look a bit disappointed?

I rolled off my bed and started to put on some shoes and a jacket. Whatever, it's not like we are going to be friends or anything.

In the end I had to sit with him anyway. By the time we got to the theatre room, most of the seats were already filled up. That's what happens when you're late for a movie on premier day, I guess.

Grudgingly, I had to sit right next to him. Luckily, he was scared of me. Scared of what I think of him, or what I'll tell Tadashi. He hasn't looked at me yet even though we're thirty minutes into the movie. Which is great, by the way.

A particularly funny scene came up and I laughed. I heard a deep chuckle and turned my eyes away from the screen to look at Tyrone Nial. I barely caught his grey eyes looking at me when he turned back to the movie, clearing his throat and willing the grin off his face. He isn't sneaky at all. I scowled and turned back to the movie. Why does Tadashi like this guy again?

"That guy is totally gonna die by the end of this movie.”

“I know right?” I replied as I reached into the bag of popcorn and took some into my mouth, eyes not straying from the screen.

“Why would he do that? It's so stupid!” He mumbled angrily.

“And what's worse is that those two elements don't even combine to make vibranium!”

“That's what I'm saying!”

The movie went on smoothly.

“This movie isn't as good as the others, I don't like all these new characters.” I said.

“Same.”

My eyes didn’t stray from the screen once the whole movie, even when I passed the popcorn around. By the end of the movie, on the last fight scene, I was screaming in my head in celebration. The whole team was together, and the fighting had gotten epic! One of the characters from the second movie came back and left it on a cliffhanger, of course, right after they held a funeral for the character we all knew was going to die.

Walking out of the theatre, realization hit me as I looked at the car in front of me. I froze, popcorn-filled hand halfway to my mouth. Only when I felt the bag I was holding in the bend of my arm start to slip did I come back to reality.

That was his car..! This whole time... I'd been actually enjoying spending time with him!

A shiver of disgust went up my spine.

Looking up at him, at his cheeky and scrutinizing dimpled grin, at his normally grey eyes now the color of the sky, filled with stars, I couldn't believe how easily he had..infected me..

He really was just as tall as Tadashi. From here I could really see all of him clearly. His nose was long and skinny, aside from the bulb atop his oversized top lip, with loose brown hair and a cowlick at the top of his head. Yet, in this light, outside, in the way of the stars...he was..

Nevermind.

Anyway, we got home safe and I was tired out. He followed me up the stairs, saying he would wait for Tadashi to get home, and for once I didn't say anything about it. I was able to withstand being in the room with him for more than a couple seconds. Gosh, I withstood sitting next to him for two hours! Or was it four? What time was it? It seemed like time had stopped, or like it was maybe one o'clock in the morning or something, like we were outside of time itself, outside of reality..

But what, we left at 7:15 or something? That movie was probably like four hours so it's probably like..eleven something right now. Ugh I need to take a shower..

"So you liked that movie?"

Oh no, small talk!

“Yeah, it was okay.." I said, putting on my look of boredom as I rolled around on my bed, relaxing.

“Tadashi told me you were a fan.”

“I wouldn't say I'm a fan,”

“You've seen all the movies in theatre, you collect the comics and have action figures..?”

I rolled on my stomach and glared at him. “What?”

“That's what Tadashi said.” He lifted his hands in surrender, a face that said, "I'm not the one guilty here".

I sighed and laid on my side, closing my eyes.

"Hey..." He spoke up. I ignored him. “Is that a magnetic-bearing servo using bot-fighter?!" My eyes snapped open and I heard him shuffle over to my bed. His eyes laid on something past me and I looked to see he was pointing at the bot I used to use for bot-fighting. Now that I'm trying to get in to the nerd school, I don't pay it any more attention.

“Uh...yeah..?”

“Awesome! Tadashi told me you were into bot fighting but he always said it like it was a bad thing! I mean, it's not illegal unless you're-”

“Betting on it,” we said in unison. He looked at me with his wide grey eyes and smiled.

“I never did it, but I always thought it seemed cool.” He said, pausing before reaching for it, and looking at me as he did it. “Can I?" I nodded. “How does it usually go, are there rules?” He asked as he examined it.

I turned over on my back and held myself up on my elbows. “Nah, not really. Just whoever wins— wins..? I guess..”

“Sounds trippy.” He says, pulling at the bot's arms and legs. “No rules? And if you're betting money on it– must cause some problems afterward, or during..”

I nodded. I could agree with that.

He handed it back to me and I put it back in its place on my desk.

At that moment, Tadashi walked up from behind the curtain separating our halves of the room. To my surprise he was completely silent, but I guess he usually was. Again, he was making an annoying face.

When Tyrone Nial turned around and both his eyes and smile brightened, I scowled in disgust. He immediately went in for a hug and if it wasn't repulsive I don't know what is. Tadashi hugged him back, arms around his shoulders.

 He glanced at me before pulling back from the brunet and asking, “Did he treat you well?” I rolled my eyes.

“Yeah, actually..Did you know they replace almost all the characters for the fourth movie?” Tyrone Nial refused to remove his hands from Tadashi's waist and it was making me sick.

“I'm sure everyone knew that.”

“Shut up! Anyway, how was the-..whatever it was?”

“The 'whatever it was'?” Tadashi chuckled. “It went smoothly, actually it didn't last too long, about forty-five minutes. I got back way before you guys got here.”

Both me and Tyrone Nial gave him an incredulous look.

“Why didn't you say anything? Did you hear us?”

“Oh, no. I went late night shopping with aunt Cass.”

Tyrone Nial smiled charmingly. Ugh.

“Aw~, you missed me?" He teased.

“Can you guys not? I'm right here!” I complained and they turned to me, as though they completely forgot I was there for a second. Tadashi pulled back and Tyrone Nial finally let go of him.

“Were you nice to Mn?” He asked as though he was a mother about to chastise me for not thanking the icecream man. Mn was Tyrone Nial's nickname from the group. It sounds like Min but is spelt like Mn, according to Fred. Don't ask me how he got it, I have no idea. It was for friends only and I'm definitely not his friend.

“Yeah, yeah, I was nice.” I replied, resisting the urge to roll my eyes. “Maybe..”

He stared at me for a moment and turned back to Tyrone Nial who was slowly backing up out of my view. “I'm sorry for my brother, he's a big dork. Don't mind him.”

His deep chuckle rumbled through the room. “It's fine, it was nice hanging out with him. Hey!” He came back into view and this time he was looking right at me with apparent straightforwardness. “I liked hanging out with you.” He told me to my face, and I don't remember anything much after that. I went to sleep soon after that, I think. I feel like maybe Tyrone Nial slept over, but I try not to think about it. Maybe he did go home, who knows? But I do remember a kiss.

I definitely, specifically, remember a kiss. Chaste, maybe even just a peck, but either way- a kiss.

    I ignored the burning in my cheeks.