People were staring, Byulyi knew it without even looking. And she really wasn’t looking, because then she’d be staring with them, and she didn’t want to do that. Didn’t want to be like those gawking, drooling guys. She was better than that. Or so she hoped.

 

She couldn’t really blame the gawkers though. Kim Yongsun was indeed quite a sight to behold. Long, sculpted legs, petite yet toned frame, a baby face made alluringly feminine by the power behind her bright gaze... Byulyi thought it wasn’t fair for Yongsun to look this good, because then, she couldn’t even hope to stand a chance.

 

Pressed up against the far wall of the crowded living room where it wasn’t as hard to breathe, Byulyi quietly nursed whatever mix was pressed into her hands the second she passed the threshold of the front door. The drink was bad — downright disgusting actually — but it did the job and brought the lavender haired girl to a comfortable state of inebriation, one where she was still functional enough to care about socializing but buzzed enough not to worry so much about making a fool of herself. 

 

The music was good too, a mix of jazzy electronic mixes and a bunch of obscure songs that followed the same general vibe. Not too loud, not too obnoxious. All in all, this house party might not have been such a bad idea after all. 

 

She’d have to thank Hyejin properly for inviting her later.

 

Byulyi had been talking to one of the guys there about one of their shared classes, the both of them exchanging colorful complaints about their professor’s obvious incompetence when a whisper shook the crowd as the front door opened. The lavender haired girl knew exactly who was about to walk in before she even caught a glimpse of the dirty blonde locks. Everything just seemed to stop when Kim Yongsun entered a room. A model student and social butterfly, the blonde was friends with pretty much everyone, even if she didn’t remember even half the names that were thrown at her during a night out. 

 

Her and Byulyi couldn’t be more different. 

 

Relatively reserved and not nearly as academically inclined, Byulyi preferred dance and music to whatever other mandatory classes her program threw at her. In spite of the odds though, she and Yongsun had developed an unlikely friendship, one that seemed to run deeper than the superficial interactions the blonde had in spades during her day to day life. Maybe it was an “opposites attract” type of situation, or maybe it was just luck, but Moon Byulyi had caught Yongsun’s attention when the girl had accidentally stumbled into the room she’d been practicing in one day. Everything just snowballed from there.

 

After two years of friendship, Byulyi now knew Yongsun like the back of her hand, most likely better than anyone else. Everyone knew they were close, knew they were friends, but nobody probably understood just how deep that connection ran.

 

Byulyi kept her eyes glued to the red plastic cup in her hand, only allowing herself intermittent glances in Yongsun’s direction as the blonde made her rounds, greeting people with that bright, charming smile that never failed to take her breath away. It really wasn’t fair. She took another sip of her drink, forcing it down and trying not to grimace, earning a few amused smiles from her few friends gathered nearby.

 

Byulyi kept sneaking glances the blonde’s way even as she caught the varying degrees of lust in the faces gathered around her friend. Yongsun wasn’t stupid, she knew what kind of attention she garnered from guys; she knew they would do way more than just stare if she let them. Byulyi knew Yongsun knew and she didn’t have any right to feel that way, but it ticked her off a lot more than she would ever be ready to admit. Still, she just kept sipping away.

 

It was much later in the night that Yongsun and Byulyi got to interact. The latter was sitting outside by the pool, staring dazedly at the water rippling under the soft brush of the light, midnight breeze. There weren’t a lot of people allowed outside, only a select few that Hyejin gave permission to as she didn’t want to risk the cleanliness of her precious pool for the sake of a party. It gave Byulyi the space she needed to take a breather and clear her head from the buzz of the alcohol.

 

Or so she had hoped.

 

She heard shuffling behind her, a person approaching, and suddenly, the wind was laced with the faint smell of jasmine, just enough for her to catch it. She could recognize that scent anywhere.

 

“I was looking for you,” a feminine voice said softly, soothing and slow, matching the atmosphere wrapped around Byulyi. It made the girl smile as she turned to face the blonde she knew would be standing behind her, ignoring the way her heart skipped a beat as their eyes met for the first time that night.

 

“I didn’t think I’d be hard to find,” Byulyi teased and Yongsun laughed quietly, taking another step forward. The youngest revelled at the sound. “Come sit. I don’t bite.”

 

“Don’t you though?” the blonde hummed pensively, a mischievous glint in her eyes as she moved to sit next to Byulyi. The latter could feel heat crawling up her neck at the tease, but she didn’t let it show, bringing a hand up to lightly pinch Yongsun’s cheek instead.

 

“Nope,” Byulyi answered behind a laugh as the blonde swatted her hand away annoyedly, a small overplayed whine following.

 

After a few playful hits and more friendly banter, they eventually calmed down, both of their laughters dissolving into quiet giggles, leaving space for the night sounds of the quiet suburbs to roll in and fill the silence in their stead. The crickets sung at the late summer night sky, a few stars speckling the dark canvas, listening to the insects’ chorus as it was only intermittently interrupted by a particularly loud cheer from the party inside or the occasional car rolling by the property. Though at this hour, even those became sparse.

 

Byulyi turned back to Yongsun after a while, taking a few moments to just burn the image of her into her mind for about the millionth time as she quietly observed how the blonde of her hair caught the warm light from inside, how her closed lashes lightly fluttered when the breeze picked up, how her chest rose and fell slowly as she leaned back on her arms, carefree and relaxed and so unlike the hyper, chatty Yongsun that had walked into the party earlier. All these little details about her, details other people would never care to notice, Byulyi cherished with all her might. And maybe she did stare sometimes, but she was never going to be like all those boys with Yongsun, even when the blonde looked at her with that same fire in her eyes, that same want. 

 

Never here though. They were friends at the party, but at home, Byulyi was completely and entirely Yongsun’s.

 

“It’s getting late,” the blonde suddenly mumbled, smiling before she even opened her eyes, knowing full well they would lock with Byulyi’s as soon as they did. She always seemed to know when the purple haired girl was looking.

 

“It is,” the latter hummed in acknowledgement, turning her gaze to the bench they were sitting on, quietly picking at the wood grain as she counted her breaths.

 

“Come over?” Yongsun asked quietly, hand moving next to Byulyi’s on the bench, fingers grazing slightly. “I’ll pay for the cab.”

 

Byulyi had enough shame to pretend she had to think about it, eyes trailing along the hazy outlines of a solitary cloud as she let the silence linger for a little bit, trying to ignore the warmth of the blonde’s hand as she played with her fingers. When she eventually decided she’d waited enough, she turned to Yongsun, the expectant look on the latter’s face having her stomach twist around painfully.

 

“Yeah, I’ll come over,” Byuli answered, biting her bottom lip to try and hide her growing smile at the other’s happy little giggle. She barely had a second to react when Yongsun suddenly grabbed her hand more firmly, quickly dragging her back inside to call for the cab and say goodbye to everyone, blurting out she’d meet her at the front door before disappearing into the crowd.

 

Byulyi finished her rounds rather quickly, wishing her few friends and acquaintances goodnight before she headed for the door, spotting Yongsun in the corner of her eyes trying to politely end an impromptu conversation one of her friends had struck with her. She might have to wait a while.

 

Just as she was about to open the front door and head out to wait on the porch, Byulyi felt a hand on her shoulder, the familiar sight of long, sharpened nails having her smile before she even turned around.

 

“You think I’d let you leave my house this easily?” a deep raspy voice sounded behind her and Byulyi squashed the urge to roll her eyes, sending a grin her friend’s way instead as she played along.

 

“Hyejin,” she greeted, leaning her back against the door as she fully turned to face the other. “I thought I was being sneaky enough.”

 

“Please,” Hyejin scoffed, a familiar smirk playing on her deep red lips. “With that hair of yours, I could spot you a mile away.”

 

“Tell that to Wheein! She’s the one who couldn’t find me at the mall the other day even though I was literally two meters away,” Byulyi said behind a laugh, the other briefly joining in.

 

“She’s also the one who told me you were so rudely leaving without even saying bye to me.”

 

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t find you,” Byulyi answered, winking playfully as she added, “Thought you’d found someone to bed you for the night.”

 

“Oh, like you just did?” Hyejin shot back without missing a beat, her smile widening in amusement as the other girl’s dropped slightly.

 

“I’m just going home,” the purple haired girl countered, though she recognized that glimmer in her friend’s eyes that meant she knew much better than to believe that.

 

“Going home with Yongsun,” Hyejin corrected, as if that in and of itself was enough to paint a whole picture of the night to come.

 

“And?” Byulyi played dumb, sending her friend an innocent smile when she scoffed.

 

“You and your girl are anything but subtle.”

 

“She’s not my girl,” Byulyi immediately shut Hyejin’s tease down, ignoring the way her stomach hurt slightly as she said those words. The shorter girl raised an eyebrow at that, lips twitching slightly as she stared her down.

 

“Could’ve fooled me,” Hyejin said, watching carefully as Byulyi’s jaw tightened ever so slightly. 

 

“Wouldn’t have to cause you’d be the first to know if she was,” the latter huffed, fingers quickly combing through her ruffled bangs in an attempt to calm her nerves. She hated when Hyejin got all investigative like that. It forced her to actually confront things she’d rather ignore. “Look, she doesn’t want a relationship and it’s fine. We’re friends, we , there’s nothing more to it.”

 

“You want it though,” the girl immediately followed, eyes still glued to Byulyi’s as the latter cocked her head to the side, slightly taken aback.

 

“What?”

 

“A relationship,” Hyejin pressed mercilessly, taking a step forward when the other looked away. She waited until she had her gaze again before adding, “You like her.”

 

Byulyi sighed, trying hard to convince herself that the scattered rhythm of her heartbeat as Hyejin spoke those words was just a coincidence, that she didn’t actually care. She tried even harder to ignore the pitying glint now shining in her friends eyes. She really did hate when Hyejin started to pry.

 

“I’d rather have what we have now than nothing at all,” Byulyi eventually managed to say after a few moments, reciting what she’d told herself over and over again. “That’s enough for me.”

 

Hyejin didn’t answer right away this time, letting the silence between them linger, as though she was assessing whether pressing the issue was worth it in the moment. Byulyi sent her a pleading look, and it seemed to shake the other’s resolve, her eyes softening back to something a little less harsh, almost caring, and the purple haired girl felt like she could breathe easier again.

 

“Just be careful?” Hyejin said behind a sigh, taking a step forward to squeeze Byulyi’s shoulder. “Yongsun’s really nice, but I don’t think she understands just how much she could hurt you.”

 

“I’ll be careful,” Byulyi answered quickly in an attempt to put an end to the conversation, sending a reassuring smile her friend’s way even when she saw the doubt on her features. Just as Hyejin was opening to say more, a familiar voice cut through the buzz of conversation in the background.

 

“Hyejin!” Yongsun called, a bouncy note to her voice as she approached them, thankfully not noticing the grim aura around them. “Thanks for the party, it was really fun!”

 

“Yeah, it was great,” Byulyi quickly added to Yongsun’s words, sending a grateful smile Hyejin’s way as the girl chuckle lightly, seemingly deciding to let it slide, turning to the blonde instead.

 

“It was my pleasure.”

 

“Me and Byulyi are headed out,” Yongsun said as she shuffled around the host, sending her a bright smile. “Hope to catch you at school!”

 

“Yeah,” Hyejin answered mutedly, returning the girl’s smile before turning back to Byulyi. “Stay safe guys, thanks for coming.”

 

They both thanked the girl again, exiting through the door as they saw their cab pull up to the front of the house. But even as they huddled together in the backseat, Byulyi couldn’t quite get the sour taste out of . She was vaguely aware of Yongsun greeting the driver, giving him her address, but she got lost in thought for a few moments.

 

The blonde seemed to notice how quiet she got, a warm hand settling on her cheek.

 

“You okay, Byul?” Yongsun’s voice was gentle, concerned. Byulyi hated to see her worry like that.

 

“I’m fine,” the purple haired girl mumbled, sending Yongsun a small, reassuring smile as she gently took the back of the hand on her cheek, kissing its palm lovingly. “I’m just tired.”

 

“You sure? We can sleep if you want.”

 

“I’ll be fine,” Byulyi mumbled as she gently tugged Yongsun closer, feeling that familiar shiver trail her spine as she felt the warmth of the other girl’s body bleeding in with her own, slowly washing away the doubt, replacing it with want.

 

As her lips moulded to Yongsun’s in a sweet, slow kiss, it only reaffirmed to Byulyi that this was enough, that it was worth it, no matter how dangerous. No matter how much it hurt sometimes. No body had ever fit with hers as well as the blonde’s, no one had ever said her name as perfectly as she had, had spelled it with her tongue as beautifully as she had. There was no one like Yongsun, and if that’s what it took to feel her near her, Byulyi was willing to forgo labels.

 

They were friends at the party, she’d give Yongsun her body at home.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

-a/n-

 

Important: This is fiction! Do not give your all someone who’s not willing to do the same for you in return, especially if it is affecting your mental health! You are wonderful and you matter too <3

 

On that note, hello!

Long time no see :D

 

I hope you enjoyed this little update~

I was listening to King Princess “Homegirl” and got super inspired! If you haven’t heard this song, I promise it is worth your time! One of my all time favourite :3

 

Thank you so much for reading and please leave a comment if you can! As always, I really appreciate it :D

 

Thanks again and have a great continuation~