Joohyun opened her bedroom door before Seungwan was even done knocking. “Yerim, did you – Oh, Seungwan!”, she exclaimed happily, capturing her in a tight hug. It was short, but enough for Seungwan to be stunned into silence.

“I was so worried! You reached for that flower and suddenly your entire body was like stone, your eyes were pure black, you wouldn’t react to my touch”, the princess gasped out in a single breath. She paused to inhale, hands gripped tightly around Seungwan’s. “I brought you to the palace at once, but you were taken to the mage’s tower and I wasn’t allowed to visit you. I had Lady Kim bring me news of any development, but it simply wasn’t the same”

“I should have been there, by your side”, Joohyun continued with a heavy voice. Seungwan wanted to stop her from rambling on, ease her guilt, but her mind was still fuzzy from the curse, or maybe just from going down all those stairs, and she could barely keep up with Joohyun’s speech, let alone interrupt it.

“It was all my fault, if I hadn’t ordered you to pick that flower, then –“

“Then you would have picked it yourself”, Seungwan said simply, finally managing to cut in as concern for Joohyun sharpened her mind. “I don’t regret what I did”

The princess bit back an answer, chewing on her bottom lip unhappily. “Seungwan, are we friends?”, she asked timidly, the strange question awakening Seungwan’s curiosity. She nodded in confirmation, squeezing Joohyun’s hands for emphasis, and the princess swallowed nervously before carrying on. “The prince will be arriving soon. Once he does, preparations will begin for our marriage. It should only take a few months and then we’ll return to his kingdom together”

She paused, clenched her jaw in a show of uncertainty that Seungwan had never seen in her before. Why was she acting like this? “Will you come with us? You can be one of my ladies in waiting, the only one, even. You wouldn’t have to brush my hair or dress me or any of those silly things. I can do them myself. But will you come?”, she requested earnestly. The offer dug itself into Seungwan’s chest with painful pressure and she realized in an instant that something terrible had happened.

She didn’t have a crush on Joohyun. Whatever it was, whatever feelings they might be, had grown far beyond any innocent infatuation. The thought of following Joohyun and her husband along in their happiness, of standing just a step behind, just a step beneath them, filled her heart with ash and cinders. She couldn’t possibly imagine it, just as she couldn’t imagine standing by as Joohyun left without her.

She opened to answer, but she was silenced by Joohyun’s finger pressing against . “I don’t ask this of you as your princess. I ask it as your friend”

“I told you before, Joohyun”, she began, the princess’s finger flying off her lips as soon as they began to move, like it had been jolted by the motion. “The two can’t be so readily separated”, she reminded her gently. She doubted she’d be around after the wedding, not when that was the end of the story, but Joohyun’s request had only reminded her of how everything would change from the moment the prince arrived. Joohyun didn’t need to leave the kingdom to step outside Seungwan’s reach. Any day now, she’d be gone.

“If I were not your princess, but merely your friend, would you say yes?”, Joohyun asked desperately. Her intensity threw Seungwan off-balance, something in her words making her uneasy even as she struggled with her own emotions. The princess didn’t just sound eager to keep her friend, she sounded almost… scared.

Why was it so imperious that Seungwan travel with her? “I know these last few days have frightened you”, she said instead of answering Joohyun’s question, wondering if the princess was afraid of another attack, “but once the prince is here, he will make sure to keep you safe. He can ensure your protection much better than I ever could”, she added encouragingly. She hoped the princess would understand that she’d safe even without her, but Joohyun didn’t seem cheered up by her words at all. She only began to chew her bottom lip again, face set in a frown.

A strange thought ran through Seungwan’s mind, one that she hadn’t considered once because it didn’t make sense at all. “Joohyun, do you want to marry the prince?” It was their fairy tale. The story of how Joohyun and the prince met, two beautiful specimens of royalty, and gladly joined their futures together, to live happily ever after. So surely she wanted to marry him, right?

The princess seemed confused by her question. “Of course. I want to unite our kingdoms, to perform my duty as a princess”, she said simply.

A growing concern, much worse than any she had felt since she’d arrived, began to bubble inside her. Could it really be? The meaning of Joohyun’s distress shone with sudden clarity, but still Seungwan couldn’t help but wonder if she was only seeing what she wanted to see, even if she desperately didn’t want to see it. “But will it make you happy?”, she insisted.

Joohyun remained silent for a long time, only looking at her, her gaze unnervingly intense. Seungwan wasn’t sure whether she was thinking or searching her, like the answers would be found somewhere inside Seungwan.

“If you’re with me, I’ll be happy”, she said at last, nodding at her own words. Seungwan’s head began to swim, exhaustion and confusion combining in the most terrible way. She didn’t know what to do. She didn’t know what to think. She didn’t want it to mean what she thought it meant, because that would make things so terribly complicated.

She lost her balance for a moment and once again, it was Joohyun holding her up with her dainty little hands. “You must be tired, you should rest”, she said gently, abandoning the conversation without hesitation to take Seungwan’s arm and guide her to her room. “I’ll watch over you, would that be alright? It’s all I’ve wanted to do, these three days and nights”

Seungwan knew she should be alone, that she needed solitude to truly think over everything and make any sense of it. But Joohyun’s pleading eyes were hard to resist, especially now that she looked so vulnerable, gazing earnestly at Seungwan like her proximity was all she could want in this moment. And Lady Kim wasn’t there, Seungwan realized with a start.

In the book, the princess’s faithful lady in waiting had remained by her side all through her recovery from the terrible curse, assisting the king’s mage. Then they had returned to her room, where she had watched over her carefully, keeping her safe from all threats. Now Lady Kim was up in that tower chatting to Sooyoung, as relaxed as the rest of the palace. Would it be safe for Joohyun to return to her room alone?

No, she must go with Seungwan. Nobody would look for her there. She would be safer. “Yes, I would like that”, she breathed out, letting Joohyun carry her inside the room and to her bed.

Joohyun settled herself by her side, sitting on the bed and keeping a watchful eye on its occupant. Closing her eyes, Seungwan pretended to fall into slumber as she considered all the issues that she needed to settle, wilting at how they pressed on her from all sides.

She began with the question of how to have Joohyun as surrounded by protective forces as she should be at this point, well aware that she was orbiting what really sat on her mind. Still, it wasn’t a question she should ignore. She’d have to find a way to convince the king, or maybe just the captain of the guards, or even Lady Kim if there was no other way.

However, that point would really depend on the second issue. If she tried to follow the original story, Joohyun would end up marrying the prince. The book had clearly stated that they lived happily ever after, but it seemed evident to Seungwan that things might not be that simple. His arrival was not something that the princess looked forward to and she began to wonder if his presence would change her mind about him.

Because all this hung on the final issue, the one that she hardly dared to consider, hardly dared to imagine. What did Joohyun really want? Could it be, could it really be, wasn’t Seungwan beyond foolish to even think of the possibility? Why would Joohyun want anything from her? What could she possibly have to give her? What did she have that was worthy of the princess? Worthy of her presence, of her company. Of her love.

Could it be love?

She felt a soft hand press lightly against her forehead, smoothing the creases that had formed there as she mulled over the mess she’d made of this fairy tale and of her own heart. She tried to relax her face, satisfied when Joohyun’s fingers left her forehead to run slowly through her hair, then down, following the curve of her cheek until Joohyun’s hand was cupping her jaw. The touch was cool, soothing amid the confusion that swarmed in her mind.

Then Joohyun’s thumb travelled across Seungwan’s cheek, its path impossibly slow, finally arriving at the corner of her lips. It paused there, signalling Joohyun’s uncertainty, immobile for so long that Seungwan thought she must have simply settled it there. But then, almost as soon as Seungwan had reached this conclusion, it started moving again, hesitantly following the line of her lower lip.

Seungwan’s eyes shot open, startling Joohyun so thoroughly that she nearly fell off the bed. She tried her best to play it off, casually asking if she’d woken Seungwan, to which the latter replied with a weak nod. She might feel guilty for interrupting Seungwan’s rest, but that would still be better than letting her know that Seungwan had been awake through all of that.

She knew what it was. It was the worst thing that could possibly happen. It was so thoroughly terrible that she couldn’t come up with a single excuse for why it took all her willpower to keep from smiling. She shouldn’t be smiling because this shouldn’t be happening. It couldn’t happen. She couldn’t let it happen, she just couldn’t.

“I should… let you rest”, Joohyun finally said, once she’d recovered from her surprise. She squeezed Seungwan’s hand in an uncertain gesture, then got up, disappearing behind the curtains that hid the room from view. A door opened, then closed. Seungwan took a deep breath that did nothing to clear the knot in .

“Well, fudge”, she said to the empty room, her lips still tingling with the ghost of Joohyun’s touch. Now she’d done it. Now the princess had fallen for her.

(…)

Prince Park Bogum arrived on a beautiful, sunny day. The pleasantly warm weather contrasted strangely with the cool reception he received from the princess. She wasn’t rude, far from it. No matter how terrible her inner turmoil, the etiquette drilled into her throughout her childhood would never allow for outright rudeness.

She was simply a bit… cold. She went through every formality, smiled when she should smile, giggled when she should giggle, listened intently when the prince spoke. But it all seemed so clearly performed for his sake. So empty of deeper meaning.

Of course, that might simply be the way Seungwan saw it. Armed with the knowledge that only she had, she knew that the princess wasn’t that interested, that she couldn’t possibly be when there was so much on her mind. At least she hoped, even if she knew she shouldn’t.

She drowned her confusing sorrows in another glass of the deceptively light drink that was being served to all guests at the great feast in the honour of prince Bogum’s arrival. Forcefully separated from Joohyun by the demands of duty, she sat alone at a table and tried not to get drunk too quickly, which was hard to avoid when her options were drinking or staring into nothing. Or worse, staring at the prince and the princess, a beautiful little pair, performing their royal duties flawlessly.

“Lady Son. I hope I’m not interrupting”, a somewhat familiar voice sounded by her ear. She turned lazily and found herself face to face with the captain of the guards.

“Oh, hello, captain. And don’t worry, there is nothing to interrupt”, she declared cheerfully, because if she said it in any other tone it would make it seem like her loneliness hadn’t been a choice.

“Please, call me Seulgi”, the captain insisted pleasantly.

“Very well then, Seulgi. And you can call me Seungwan”, she replied with a wide grin. “So, what brings you to this corner of the hall, Seulgi? Did you seek my company? Perhaps my help in relaying a request to the princess”, she added with a wink. She felt like she might be going a bit too strong on the playful angle, but she was teetering on a dangerous line between happy drunk and sad drunk and she’d like to avoid ending the night in alcohol-fuelled tears.

“Well, to be honest, it is neither”, Seulgi confessed shyly. “I came here with a request for you, Lady So- Seungwan”, she corrected herself quickly.

Seungwan chuckled at the attempt, patting the guard’s arm reassuringly. “I am all ears, captain Seulgi”, she said with a smirk. “Perhaps you’d like to sit down before making this request. These loud celebrations make conversation at a distance quite difficult”

Seulgi nodded and sat by Seungwan’s side, keeping a respectful distance between them. “I wanted to speak with you regarding Her Highness’s safety”, she began, glancing towards the princess as she spoke. “The two recent incidents resulted in no harm to Her Highness, but this was entirely by chance, and the same cannot be said of you, Seungwan”, she carried on, cringing slightly at addressing her so informally. Seungwan wanted to rest her hand on Seulgi’s arm for support, but she felt that this might only make the guard more uncomfortable, so she didn’t.

“However, I fear that this luck might have emboldened Her Highness. The truth is that the situation is concerning. Two attempts on the princess’s safety in such a short time should not be brushed aside, regardless of the consequences”, Seulgi insisted with furrowed brows, her lips curved into a concerned frown. Seungwan fought back the urge to giggle at the adorable sight. “The fact that Her Highness would so easily leave the palace without an is troubling”

“I see”, Seungwan declared with a playful display of gravity that was gone in a flash. “So I was correct in my initial assumption. You wished to relay a request to the princess. After all, you want me to tell her to be more careful”

She giggled at her witty words, pleased with the way they stumped Seulgi for a moment as she searched for the words to justify herself. Seulgi wanted her to convince Joohyun that she needed more guards. That she must warn them whenever she wanted to go out.

“Oh, fudge”, she muttered as she realized that she was responsible for ensuring the heavy guard that should be following Joohyun at this very moment. Why must she go through everything herself, pushing uphill every step of the way to keep this story on track? She began to feel like the story itself didn’t want to be told. And all this so she could marry Joohyun off to that stupid beautiful prince with the perfect hair and the nice jawline.

“What’s fudge?”, Seulgi asked with curiosity, explanations apparently abandoned in favour of asking strange questions.

“What? Fudge? It’s just a bad word. I shouldn’t have said it, do forgive me”, she said quickly, reaching for her drink.

“Well, yes, I understood that from the context. But what does it mean? I’ve never heard it”, Seulgi insisted.

Right. Fairy-tale medievalesque kingdoms wouldn’t have fudge, would they? “It’s, uh, a type of fish. A river fish. Mud fish. Hence the name” She took a deep breath to stop herself from babbling on, but Seulgi only looked at her expectantly, so she continued. “It’s common near my home and it’s very bland and tasteless. A terrible fish. So now we use it as a curse word”

“Interesting”, Seulgi drawled, looking truly fascinated by the concept. “Fudge, huh? It’s strange that it would be a tasteless fish, because it sounds so tasty. Fudge” She suddenly stopped and grew red under Seungwan’s scrutiny, probably realizing that she’d been cursing happily in front of a lady.

“I will speak to Her Highness”, Seungwan said mercifully, setting a hand gently on one of Seulgi’s to draw her attention. The mention of Joohyun seemed to turn her head irresistibly, drawing her gaze back to the princess like a magnet. “I can’t promise that she’ll listen, but I’ll try”, she concluded distractedly as the prince leaned in to say something near Joohyun’s ear and she giggled at his words.

When she turned back to Seulgi, the guard nodded, relieved and grateful. Seungwan felt the satisfaction of a job well done spreading inside her, bravely fighting back the urge to step into sad drunk territory. “Now, would you like to dance?”, she asked cheerfully, getting to her feet and immediately stumbling forwards and nearly crashing into the captain.

“I think dancing might not be the best idea right now”, Seulgi suggested diplomatically. Seungwan considered her words, one hand resting on her shoulder for support. She continued considering them as Seulgi got to her feet and carefully held her arms, guiding her towards the exit. She was still thoughtfully nodding when they stepped out of the hall, although by this point she’d forgotten what she was supposed to be mulling over.

Seulgi supported her weight with one hand as she scratched her own head with the other, probably unsure what to do with this intoxicated noblewoman. Luckily, Joohyun left the hall shortly after them, head whipping from side to side until she stopped the pair.

“Seungwan, are you alright?”, she asked with concern that turned to puzzlement when Seungwan raised her free hand to offer her a thumbs-up.

“Lady Son had a bit too much to drink”, Seulgi explained for her. “I can take the lady to her room, but I don’t know where it is”, she admitted sheepishly.

Joohyun tried to insist on carrying Seungwan herself, but once it became clear that she would have to drag her full weight up several flights of stairs, she had to give in and leave the carrying to Seulgi. In the end, all three made their way to Seungwan’s room, where Seulgi said her goodbyes with many unnecessary apologies and bows mixed in, and the princess took Seungwan inside to make sure she reached the bed.

Safely tucked in, Seungwan sighed in bliss, surrounded by all the things she loved. Joohyun and the lovely canopy bed that made her feel like she was sleeping on a tiny private island.

“Seungwan?”, a voice sounded from far away, dragging her painfully away from pleasant canopy dreams and the wonderful feeling of soft, fresh sheets enveloping her like a fluffy cloud. With a herculean effort, she managed to hum in indication that she was listening. “Are you angry with me?”

She frowned, confused at the words. She even managed to open her eyes, which landed on the most beautiful face she had ever seen, unpleasantly scrunched up in worry. “Why would I be angry?”, she asked with genuine confusion. “I love you”, she sighed dreamily. Then she drifted off to sleep.