Chapter IV: History
That Cold Starlight“Mom, I really don’t want to be an actress. You know that.”
“Then, what will you do? Be an office girl with a minimum salary after you graduate? What kind of vision do you have? Bigger is better and better is bigger! How could you not think of something like that?”
“But…”
“No buts, mother knows best.”
I’m an incoming freshman and she wants me to major in Theatre and . I don’t even want to be an artist. Why does she want to control my life? I have my own decision. But, why am I following her decision for me then? It’s because all I’ve wanted is some appreciation from my parents. I’ve been trying to be a good daughter, but I guess my half-sister always does it better than me.
I walked out in the middle of our conversation, I don’t really like where is this going. I just let my feet work its wonder. The last thing I knew, I was sitting on a swing staring blankly at the grass.
“I’m so tired of being a loser. I’m so sick of this.” I cried silently, in the middle of the dark of this park. I can feel my heart being stabbed by thousands of knives.
“I’m so tired of being me. I’m so tired getting controlled by others. I hate this. I hate myself. I’m so unappreciated.”
“That’s not true. There’s always someone who appreciates you. You just got to look closely.” I was taken aback when someone talked from the other swing. I’m too scared to see his face. He might be a ert. I’m almost ready to run.
He stood up, he’s wearing a black hoodie with a “YY” embroidery stitch on the side.
“You’re awesome. Please remember that.” With his last words, he walked out. I felt relieved, with those words. I’ve been wanting to hear that from my parents. I’m thankful to him. Whoever he is I’ll recognize him. I’ll thank him one day. I’ll change, I won’t be a loser anymore.
“I really hate this, I’ll show them that I’ll be a good actress and they’ll be proud of me. I’m so tired of being like this.” I wiped my tears and stood up, took a deep breath and smirked. You want me to be a little crazy huh? I’ll show you.
Huh? Who is she? Is she Shinhye? Wow. What a great change.
That Loser Shinhye? W-wow.
She totally became another person.
Yes, es. I won’t let anyone to control my life again. I’ll enjoy the wonder of being an actress, but this is the new me. I already built a wall that no one can break thank you, Jisoo for making me strong. Yes, it’s Jisoo. I’ve found the shirt inside his bag during our sophomore years in college, I am so glad that it’s him.
I’m a changed person because of his words of encouragement, no one can bring me down. My parents were still the same but, I know at least that they’re appreciating me more because I’ve been making a lot of money and they’ve been spending it so recklessly.
That sick guy from college, I never knew he would make it to music industry. He tried to act cool earlier huh? If I know, he still likes me. I thought as I sip on my red wine, is he playing hard to get? Just because he’s famous now? Oh dear, It makes me want to play along.
He’s been bothering me ever since our last encounter. Let’s see how far you could put up with that cool act, Jung Yonghwa. I’ll make you fall for me and make you regret that you embarrassed me in front of other people.
It’s show time!
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“형! 어디갔어? (Hyung, where did you go?) 니 얼굴이 왜 그래? (What happened to your face?)” This guy has cuts everywhere in his face. What the hell?
“It’s nothing, I found someone being bullied I thought he needed some kind of help so, yeah.”
“I don’t get it, why do you get into fights when you cannot even lift a finger to someone who’s bad mouthing you. Aish, 진짜! (Aish, Really!)” I helped him walked towards the nearest convenience store to buy first aid medicine for his cuts.
“Wait, why are you not wearing that hoodie? It’s your jinx, it’s our first day in school tomorrow! Aishhh, I’m getting crazy!” Good thing that he called me instead of JiEun or else she’ll be worried as hell and I’ll be at the side staring at her while she puts ointment on him and that’s crazier!
“I think I just found my Star.”
Huh? What kind of star?
“Eh? Did you knock your head off or something?”
“I can’t stand talking with this man already. I might end up like him.” I mumbled to myself.
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