Chapter 1: daebak! that was too fluffy authornim <3

Chapter 1: Too freaking cute

Chapter 1: Chapter 1: Holy , I just wrote a long comment and then I refreshed this page by accident... I'll try my best to remember what I initially commented ;-;

This story definitely made me feel warm! It's been a while since I read a soft and fluffy story like this, so this is very much appreciated! I like how you started this story. The setting and atmosphere is built up right from the first paragraph. I could really imagine just how cold the weather is.

I like how you made 'she' and 'her' italicised. Even though Yongsun's name is mentioned only a little later on in the story, we know who Byul is referring to, and just how much Yongsun means to her, because it seems like her life revolves around Yongsun. We can see just how much she thinks of Yongsun.

It's really heartwarming to see just how much they love each other through their actions and words, such as the way they hugged each other. You've beautifully shown this amount of love between them. It's also great that we get to see things from both Yongsun and Byul's perspectives, because we get to see the way they show that they love the other, as well as their emotions for the other. The scene where Yongsun and Byul are with their pets is just so homely and domestic.

Love the bits and pieces of humour in this story, such as this part: 'Byulyi was, and always is, fine with anything so she didn't intervene that much. Except for the money part. And the interior part too.'

It's great to see them interacting with Wheein and Hyejin. It's a good transition as well to the part about photographer!Byul taking photos of Yongsun. I like the way you wrote the scene where Yongsun carefully broached the topic about those sudden photos to Byul. They were both very patient and understanding towards each other.

I feel that there's a good build up to the surprise/proposal for Yongsun at the end. Love the repetition of '3... / 2... / 1...' where in both cases, Byul gives a surprise to Yongsun. Byul's surprise at the end though! It made me feel so warm inside ;-; I find it a really meaningful one because of the earlier scene where Byul tried to assured Yongsun that she looks stunning without trying. Those photos reflect the way Byul sees Yongsun, and it's beautiful. Gotta love that ending! Byul shouldn't assume anything ahahah!

I like how this story is a simple yet a well-written one. It's a simple story about a day (albeit a special one) in the life of a couple. It's nice that you wrote that they didn't have any major fights; I like it that there's no drama in this story, so we get to see more about the sweet part of their relationship. There's just the right amount of fluff and teasing between them in this story. The dynamics between them is just perfect, and I could see why they didn't have major fights.

Just some feedback:
1. It's better to use 'though' rather than 'tho'.
2. Dialogues/speeches should end with a punctuation. For example, it should be '"Ahh, it's a really cold day today," she silently said to herself (...)' rather than '"Ahh, it's a really cold day today" she silently said to herself (...)'.
3. The length of the paragraphs got longer as the story goes, making it a little hard to read. It would be better to break them into smaller paragraphs.

Enjoyed reading this Moonsun story from you! A sequel would be much appreciated, but I don't really have an idea in mind for it ^^; Thank you very much for this story! I hope my comment is coherent ahaha and I hope I didn't miss anything out from my initial comment zzz

Chapter 1: So fluffy <3

Chapter 1: Punches of love hahahah i actually cringed but in a good way you know gosh it’s so fluffyyy sequel pleaseee

Chapter 1: I want a sequel to this marvelous story

Chapter 1: It's sweet and beautiful <3

Chapter 1: Cute story!^^

Chapter 1: moon yongsun aaaw