The next time Youngjae was alone in the backseat. Junhong had moved to the front with Himchan and Jongup wasn’t with them. He hadn’t come home and was getting there on his own.

The procedure was the same as last time, no matter how stupid Youngjae found it. He wasn’t exactly in the position to complain.

But this time Youngjae was much more alert. As soon as the blindfold was off, he looked around the building for best possible exists, he watched where Himchan kept the key, he took note of how armed all five of them plus the guards scattered around the building were.

It wasn’t impossible, but it would take enormous amounts of luck. Youngjae hated relying on luck.

The first thing Youngjae noticed upon entering the conference hall was that there was one person there unfamiliar to him.

He was a tall blonde dressed in white and if you concentrated you could see the bandages under the fine fabric of his shirt.

As if that wasn’t a giveaway enough of who the guy was, his head was also rested on Ravi’s shoulder.

Leo, the fiancé.

Youngjae averted his gaze and instead looked for Daehyun. He had to admit, he was curious to see how Daehyun would act after the talk they’d had.

Not much seemed to have changed. Him and Hyuk only shared a formal greeting before parting ways.

Youngjae huffed. He went to the spot that he was given the last time. Bin was already sat in his, opposite of Youngjae.

When he thudded down on the chair, Bin just looked up from his laptop briefly then went back to whatever he was doing.

Everyone started to take their places even though they were still missing two people.

Ken’s voice was audible even before he entered the room.

“—I don’t care! If he shows his stupid ing face at any of my establishments ever again, I’m going to kick his right back to Hong Kong – in pieces!”

The door swung open. Ken left N at the doorway and took his place opposite of Daehyun.

“Something wrong?” Daehyun asked. He shouldn’t have.

Ken slammed his fist on the table. “Of course something’s wrong! I’ll tie ribbons out of Jackson Wang’s guts!”

Jongup whistled.

“Right on,” Youngjae said.

“I’m afraid no one’s ripping out anyone’s intestines anytime soon. Ken, take a walk,” N said while sitting down.

“But—“

“You need to cool down.” N’s voice was sharp. He wasn’t even looking at the younger.

Ken stood up suddenly and knocked the chair over. He didn’t go back to pick it up.

Yongguk sighed melodically.

“Right. Let’s talk,” N said calmly. “Youngjae, I don’t think you’ve met Leo.”

Youngjae threw a glance at the blonde. Leo gave him a distasteful look and a dismissive nod as a greeting.

Youngjae smiled. “Well aren’t you a stuck-up little—“

“Shut up,” Yongguk cut him off. “Tell us what happened with Ken.”

Youngjae nearly hit him that time. How Yongguk managed to completely ignore him while perfectly keeping him in line was maddening.

“Do you want the long or the short version?” N asked, a tired smile playing on his lips.

“The most helpful one,” Yongguk replied.

“Jackson infiltrated one of Ken’s casinos. Apparently it was just another stop of his – a message.”

“A message?” Daehyun asked, frowning.

N waved his hand dismissively. “Nothing unexpected. He suggests we give up our territory before he takes it with force.”

Daehyun tapped his fingers against the table. “Did he take any hostages?”

“No, he just made a mess of the place,” Bin informed.

“And injured Siyeon,” Ravi added.

Youngjae wanted to ask who Siyeon is, but figured he would either get ignored or the reply would be beyond useless. He kept quiet and listened.

Jongup leaned in, resting his elbows on the table. “That doesn’t make any sense. He isn’t serious about his own goal. If he really wanted you out, wouldn’t he be cutting off your profits and messing up your businesses?”

“He is doing that, in his own stupid way,” Bin muttered.

Hyuk yawned. “Maybe the police patrols scared them...”

“Police patrols?” Junhong frowned. “What police patrols?”

Bin returned the frown, finally looking up from his laptop. “There have been increased police patrols in the area... You haven’t noticed?”

“Everything is running as usual,” Junhong said.

“Looks like they just really want to take you down,” Himchan spoke for the first time since the briefing started. He wasn’t looking at anyone in particular.

“All in its time,” N said. Youngjae wasn’t sure, but something seemed to have shifted in his tone; he almost sounded angry. It was odd considering how collected he always presented himself to be.

“Jackson is just playing with us,” Leo said. “I don’t doubt the message was serious, but he doesn’t seem to have a plan.”

“Or,” Youngjae said. “He wants someone else to do the dirty work.”

N raised his eyebrows. “Elaborate.”

Youngjae shrugged one shoulder. “Just a hunch. I might be onto something because...” He threw a glance around the table and sighed, going for an uninterested look. “All that systematic plotting is not Jackson’s style. He’s chaotic, reckless and stupid. This, what he’d done at Ken’s casino is the one thing so far that actually looks like something the Jackson I know would do.”

“What are you saying?” Jongup questioned but when they locked eyes it seemed that he already knew where Youngjae was going.

“I’m saying,” his tone was steady and slow, “That someone is advising him. And, I might be taking a huge leap here, but it seems to be someone who knows you well.”

A silence fell over the table as this suggestion sank in.

“No,” Bin snapped. “I keep our information very safe. We’re extremely careful with our recruits and whom we trust with what, so you better not be suggesting what I think you are—”

“I’m just stating my observations,” Youngjae dismissed. “Aren’t I the detective here?”

“Binnie,” N spoke, twirling his pen. “It might not be someone new.”

The younger flicked his gaze to his leader, frowning.

“It might be someone we let in long ago and if that’s the case, it’s not your fault. It’s ours,” N continued.

“You’re stupid,” Junhong muttered. “He’s dead.”

Everyone flinched at the sound of cracking glass.

Even though they’d said they’d stopped drinking during meetings, water definitely wasn’t off limits.

The glass he’d been holding had snapped in Jongup’s grip.

“Jesus ing Christ,” Daehyun reacted.

Jongup looked to Junhong, rage and disappointment mixed in his contorted features. Blood trickled down his palm, dripping onto the white table.

“Why?” He whispered, which was the last thing Youngjae expected Jongup to do when angry. Whisper.

Junhong only looked away.

Youngjae had never before reacted that way to the sight of blood. He was usually completely fine with it, but now it triggered something, made him think of the memories he’d been able to suppress and bury over three years. They came rushing back, leaving him breathless.

He started fighting the restraints on his wrists, breathing quickening.

The attention of the group was divided, some worrying about Jongup’s injury, and some worrying over Youngjae’s sudden inability to draw breaths normally.

Himchan immediately stood, trying to reach for Youngjae.

“Don’t touch me!” The younger yelled, trying to back up which wasn’t the best option either seeing as Yongguk was behind him.

Yongguk took Youngjae by the shoulders, managing to keep him in place. “ing—Himchan?”

He nodded, “I’ve got this. Jae, let’s go.”

It was a struggle but Himchan managed to get a hold of Youngjae and drag him outside.

And Youngjae kept struggling, trying to get away.

“I can’t breathe,” he kept saying.

Himchan’s hand was firm on his shoulder, keeping him steady. “You can. Look at me, Youngjae. It’s alright.”

It didn’t take him long to settle down. Perhaps because Youngjae was fussing more than necessary...

He wasn’t completely faking. The trigger had been real, but it wasn’t as bad as other times. In no time Youngjae’s mind was clear and he could breathe again, but he still pretended to be upset, lulling Himchan into the role of his protector.

Youngjae looked up, blinking away tiny tears that he’d managed to muster. “Hyung... I’m sorry.”

Himchan shook his head. “It’s okay...”

He didn’t understand.

Youngjae straightened up and elbowed Himchan between the ribs. This knocked the breath out of him and Youngjae reached for his gun. Himchan leaned against the wall for balance, looking up at Youngjae in rage and disappointment.

He had the barrel pressed to Himchan’s forehead.

“Oh yeah? Go ahead. If you shoot me now they’ll hear you.”

Youngjae contemplated it. But in the last second something buried in the back of his consciousness screamed at him that he didn’t want to see Himchan dead. Even though he’d become aware of the fact the only way for this band of lowlifes to get justice was in death, Youngjae couldn’t do it.

He simply didn’t want to see Himchan dead.

He twisted the gun in his hand and used it to knock Himchan out. Youngjae watched as he tumbled, heart beating fast.

Now was his chance, and he’d have to be quick.

He knelt down to search Himchan’s pockets. He was quick to find both the small key that would get him out of the handcuffs and the keys to his BMW.

Youngjae fumbled a little until he managed to get the handcuffs off, constantly glancing back at the direction of the conference hall. The door stayed shut.

As soon as the metal rattled onto the ground next to Himchan, Youngjae ran down the hall, getting the away from the room. The good thing was that that floor seemed to be deserted.

He knew he couldn’t use the elevator or go out the front door, but he’d already taken a good look at the hallway to see where the nearest fire escape was. That’s where Youngjae was headed.

He opened the window and started descending the rusted stairs. He jumped down from the last platform, winded and panting but he knew he couldn’t stop for a second. He quickly figured out where he was and where to go to reach Himchan’s parked car.

He stayed hidden behind the corner, planning his exact route. He’d have to be quick and careful not to get noticed, since the cars were parked at the front. He took a few steady, deep breaths before he darted towards the black car.

He got inside, tossed the gun onto the passenger seat – it slid down onto the ground – didn’t even buckle his belt and started the car, eager to get as further away from the building as possible.

His heart raced as he drove away, not daring to yet think that he’d made it. He wouldn’t settle until he was at the police station, reunited with his friends.

With his girlfriend.

The thought of Yoonsun brought tears to his eyes and Youngjae started sobbing, hands shaking as he gripped the wheel. The tears made his vision blurry, but he kept driving nonetheless.

He would later figure out where he was, what was important now was to get away.

 

Youngjae dared stop after an hour of driving. Then he took the time to check his surroundings and find his way back to the police station – not the nearest one but the one where he worked, where his friends were, where the remains of his old life still existed, hopefully.

He nearly cried in relief when he reached it. He parked crookedly, grazing the BMW in the process. He didn’t care. He needed to find his friends.

He ignored his colleague at the front desk and immediately headed for Sumin’s office, hoping and praying to find her there.

Youngjae must have been lucky that day. He found not only Sumin, but Minjae with her at her office.

They both stood when they spotted him, eyes wide with disbelief.

Minjae’s disbelief quickly melted away into relief and she threw herself at Youngjae, trapping him in a bone crushing hug.

“We were so worried,” she was saying, holding him close. “I’m sorry oppa, I’m sorry we let this happen, after everything you’ve been through, I’m so sorry...”

Youngjae couldn’t accept this apology as he recalled how everything had unwound. Eunae had offered to take him home because she wanted to make sure he got there safely. Eunae, whom he failed to protect or avenge.

Her death and his captivity had been a direct result of his actions, especially those three years ago. The realization materialized itself into the form of a reflection; and then it cracked, broken shards falling out of the frame as Youngjae felt himself breaking.

With that realization, Minjae’s apology seemed kind of silly, actually.

And yet he couldn’t speak. He wasn’t ready to unveil all that he’d hidden. He trembled in her arms and broke down crying, finally after weeks of pretending to be untouchable in front of the gangs. The most crushing part was that even with all his efforts, his mask had faltered on numerous occasions.

Youngjae truly loathed himself in every possible meaning of the word.

At some point during their cry session a weight was added to the hug – Sumin, embracing her two sobbing friends in hopes of soothing them both.

“Come on,” she said after the hug had dispersed. “We’ll make you some tea and you—god you need some rest. Minjae call Yoonsun and tell her Youngjae’s okay. If you need anything—”

“I need to tell you what I’ve found out,” Youngjae immediately shot, but he did take Sumin up on the offer of sitting down.

He knew that helping now would in no way lessen the impact of his mistakes from the past, but at least for his own conscience, Youngjae had to try.

“Are you sure?” Sumin asked, frowning as she sat down opposite of him. “You don’t seem...”

“I have to tell you now. They’re after me, no doubt,” Youngjae said and glanced over at Minjae. “I’ll have some tea though, please.”

She nodded and went out.

“You’ll be safe here,” Sumin assured. “Go ahead, then.”

Youngjae took a deep breath, trying to recall everything important he’d heard from their two meetings and few encounters. “Alright so... Dobong-gu is working with another faction, it might be a stretch but they seem to be the ones who helped them get out of prison. They’re working together to take down Jackson’s gang – remember Jackson and how I failed to catch his band?”

“That wasn’t your fault,” Sumin said steadily.

Youngjae shook his head, clenching his fist. “It was. The plan didn’t work, they got away. Anyhow, they weren’t a big threat back then but they are now and that’s what Dobong-gu and Nowon-gu are doing. Apparently Jackson is causing ruckus to draw our attention – but whatever the they’re doing we need to catch them all and this time there’s no room for mistakes.”

Youngjae hadn’t realized, but he’d been subconsciously pressing down on his knuckles even after they’d cracked. Sumin reached over the table and took his hands in her own to settle him.

“Listen,” Youngjae said, looking up at her. “You need to make sure Yoonsun’s safe. Please. I can’t let anyone else suffer because of me.”

Sumin frowned. “Yoonsun? What does she have to do with this?”

Youngjae froze. He didn’t have a good enough answer, not one that wouldn’t bring to attention everything he’d been trying to hide, anyway. As he stared helplessly at Sumin, the door opened. Minjae walked over and placed the cup of tea on the table, then taking a seat on the armrest of the chair Youngjae was in.

She placed a protective hand on his head. “What’s going on?” She asked, looking between the two.

“Youngjae,” Sumin said cautiously, letting go of his hands and withdrawing. “Why is Dobong-gu after you?”

“Because,” Youngjae said irritably. “I sold them to the police. Come on, Sumin it’s easy. To them I’m a traitor!”

She didn’t seem convinced. “What does Yoonsun have to do with all this?” She repeated the previous question.

Youngjae felt the beating of his own heart in his throat. A cool feeling crept up the base of his spine all the way to the back of his neck. It was the feeling of not being safe anymore and it filled Youngjae with dread – if he wasn’t safe here, he wasn’t safe anywhere.

“Bang Yongguk threatened her,” he said at last.

“Why?” Sumin pressed.

“Because he wanted to get through to me,” Youngjae answered. Keep eye contact, keep your voice steady. He couldn’t falter lest he looked suspicious.

“Why you?”

“I told you already—”

“But why would they care?” Sumin snapped and Youngjae winced.

Minjae wrapped her arms around him. “That’s enough! Hasn’t he been through enough already? Give him a break!”

Youngjae wanted to cling to her, but he knew he didn’t deserve the comfort. Minjae didn’t understand. She trusted him too much.

“Because I was a part of the group,” Youngjae said, voice growing impossibly flat. “Yongguk wanted revenge and...” He trailed off.

“And!?” Sumin questioned.

Youngjae flinched away from her. “He wanted my help.”

“Help with what?”

Youngjae felt Minjae pulling him closer.

“He wanted my help taking Jackson down,” Youngjae finally admitted, chest rising and falling with heavy breaths.

“Did you help?” Sumin asked sternly, her fist shaking on the desk.

Youngjae didn’t answer.

“That little bug weeks ago... That was you.” Her quiet tone was like the calm before the storm. In the next moment Sumin stood, slamming her fists to the desk. “You should have refused! I don’t care what they threatened you with, you should have refused!”

Minjae jumped up from her spot, promptly inserting herself between Youngjae and their supervisor.

“Stop that!” The younger yelled, shielding Youngjae completely. “It was a high stress situation and he still drags trauma from that place! He wasn’t thinking rationally, leave him alone!”

But he had been. Youngjae had been thinking very clearly when he’d decided to help the two gangs, when he’d realized that justice is brought by the individual, not by the system. He should have known that suddenly returning to the system wouldn’t go smoothly.

“There’s still something you’re hiding,” Sumin stated, ignoring Minjae completely. “Other than wanting your help, why would Bang Yongguk be looking for you? Why would he be so set on getting revenge?”

“He hates me,” Youngjae whispered.

“Why?” Sumin pushed.

“Because I left!”

“Why would he care!?”

“Stop it, unnie!” Minjae cried. “Leave him alone!”

“You don’t understand,” Sumin said, finally addressing Minjae. “He had an affair.”

Minjae winced, gaze snapping to Youngjae. “No, he didn’t,” she said, voice shaky. “Tell her, oppa. Tell her you didn’t.”

Youngjae didn’t speak. He kept his head turned away from both of them.

Minjae slowly stood up and stepped back, towards Sumin. “No...”

“It’s his fault,” Sumin spat. “This entire show. Had you just done your job none of this would have happened! Eunae would still be alive!”

Youngjae gasped, covering his ears, ducking his head. He knew this. He knew Eunae’s death was his fault, but hearing it like this was more upsetting than he could have imagined.

Sumin straightened up, slowly making her way around the desk. “Yoo Youngjae, you are under arrest...”

His gaze snapped up, looking at her with wide eyes. This wasn’t happening.

But as she stated his every offense, there was yelling and gunfire from outside. All three of them looked to the window.

Few policemen were shooting at a car – the black BMW that Youngjae had arrived in – as it spun and drove away with a screeching sound from the tires.

Sumin cursed and turned around, grabbing her gun, but then she saw that Youngjae was no longer in the chair.

He’d used the second that the two were distracted to make his getaway. He locked the office from the outside, even though he knew it would only buy him a little time.

With another adrenaline rush his, near-panic attack was drowned out and he ran down the hallway, once again relying on the fire escape. At least he knew the layout of this building, unlike the one he’d previously escaped from.

This one was also much lower and he was on the street in no time. Without the car, Youngjae knew he had nearly no chance of escape, he knew he’d have to hide well and wait for an opportunity.

Yes, that seemed like a good plan. He ran down the street, turned left and—

—ran face first into a person, falling right onto his and nearly smacking his head on the pavement.

“Hello there,” Daehyun said with a smile before grabbing Youngjae by the collar of his shirt and slamming him up against the wall.

Daehyun was accompanied by two other people; Ken and Ravi and both looked ready to murder him,

“We gotta go!” Youngjae urged, fighting Daehyun’s grip.

“Aw, is someone after you?” He cooed mockingly, but then he heard the footsteps. His taunting expression melted away and he looked in the direction of the sound.

“Get down!” Ken yelled.

It was nearly too late.

Daehyun’s grip on Youngjae had loosened in the moment of surprise and Youngjae was free to throw himself at the elder, pushing him out of the way of the bullets.

However, as he did so there was a pain in his shoulder, much too intense to have been caused simply by the impact of the fall.

And then there was the familiar smell of blood, the warm feeling of it seeping through Youngjae’s clothes.

Daehyun looked up at Youngjae, disoriented and confused.

“You’re welcome,” the younger breathed.

Youngjae scrambled to his feet, but immediately as he got dizzy he remembered that standing up was highly inadvisable when one is being shot at. However, he then realized that they had something to hide behind – a black Ford F-150 Raptor (that must have been what Youngjae had heard in his moment of saving Daehyun) was taking the fire.

Or it would have been if there was any. Sumin and Minjae had stopped shooting as they were being joined by reinforcements.

“Step out and drop your weapons,” Sumin said in her booming “I’m arresting you” voice, addressing both the four of them hiding behind the vehicle and the two people – Yongguk and Junhong – inside.

Youngjae had a feeling it wouldn’t all quite go as she’d planned.

None of them moved. She repeated the command.

And then in the far distance, on the other end of the building a booming blast went off.

“That’s Jongup!” Ravi informed and not a second later Himchan’s BMW made way through the smoke, coming to a screeching stop near the Ford.

Daehyun by then had gotten his together enough to pick himself up from the ground as well as get a hold of Youngjae right before he dropped back down.

He opened the door with one arm, keeping his other around Youngjae, then shoved him inside, climbing in after him. Ken followed.

Ravi darted for Himchan’s car, where Hyuk and Jongup already were.

Yongguk, who was at the wheel, asked no questions, just slammed on the gas pedal; but instead of driving away, which one might consider the logical option, he drove right at the blockade that was slowly forming – no more than two cars were currently in their way.

Ken started laughing.

Perhaps there was even a hint of a smile on Yongguk’s lips as the policemen get out of the way of the massive car. The impact was heavy, making everyone inside jump and jolt in their seats but the Ford did not stop. No, after the crash it kept going smoothly, with Himchan’s BMW following close behind.

Through the window on his side Youngjae caught glimpse of one of the police cars, smashed, spinning into a traffic light with a loud crashing noise.

Ken laughed louder in pure delight. “This is like Busan all over again!” He said, smiling at Daehyun.

He only frowned. “You and I remember Busan very differently.”

He didn’t take the time to ponder over whether this experience was anything like the one in Busan – whatever that was – because he needed to help Youngjae.

Youngjae whose head was spinning, whose vision was dotted and blurry at the edges.

“Junhongie!” Daehyun called. “He got shot, I need you at the back!”

Junhong gave a sharp nod and climbed between the two front seats to the back, while Ken in turn took the same route and settled in the front beside Yongguk. The switcharoo was dangerous as it was, more so with the speed they were going at, but the spaciousness of the car at least made it possible to carry out without any bashed heads.

“Where was he shot?” Yongguk asked, stealing a glance at the rear view mirror.

Perhaps Youngjae was imagining – very likely, considering his current state – but he thought he felt the car speed up.

“Shoulder. He’ll be fine,” Junhong informed, doing his best to apply pressure on the wound and prevent any further blood loss.

He was talking to Youngjae, but he could no longer hear. He hardly saw anything either, the only thing he saw was the light of the lamp posts, passing in a blur as they raced down the highway.