Six Hundred Miles

 

 

Junmyeon × Yixing

 

 

 

Spring has always been Junmyeon’s favorite season.

 

He loves the season for the scent of flowers and the vibrant colors it has. Despite the pain it also brings, he admits that everything is beautiful in Spring.

 

He’s on the couch in the living room of his apartment, back resting against the hand rest, legs stretched across the pillowed surface. Behind him is a tall window that covers almost the entire wall, perfectly showcasing the beautiful view of Seoul city outside, letting warm sunlight in. Secured between his fingers is a book. A novel, precisely. It’s opened at a certain page.

 

The soft sound of guitar play echoes throughout the spacious room. He looks up from the novel, and in front of him, at the other corner of the couch, sits a man around his age, a classic brown guitar resting on his laps while slender, graceful fingers are dancing on its strings. Fringe may cover almost half of the man’s face, but it doesn’t cover his beautiful look. Junmyeon finds himself nearly breathless by the sight. Such a beautiful man, creating beautiful melodies with his guitar.

 

As if he knows he’s being stared at, the man stops his fingers from picking on the strings and looks up to meet Junmyeon’s gaze. Then the man smiles at him, ever so gently, and suddenly everything is brighter.

 

A smile bloom on Junmyeon’s lips as well. He inhales before calling the man’s name.

 

“Yixing.”

 

The man’s smile gets wider.

 

‘I like you’, Junmyeon wants to say after. ‘I like you a lot.’

 

But before he can muster up the courage, everything fades into black.

 

=

 

His dream swirls into reality as he opens his eyes.

 

And he lets out the heaviest sigh ever.

 

Done letting the nudge on his arm goes on, he finally turns around on the bed, finding Sehun already standing next to it with a sleepy look on his face.

 

‘You only have forty minutes left to get ready.’ Sehun signs. ‘Can’t miss the launch of your own novel.’

 

Junmyeon feels like crying. It’s rare to dream of Yixing, even of being able to call his name and hear his guitar play.

 

However, a smile grows on his lips; it surely will stay for the rest of the day.

 

 

 

[L] IS THE LAUNCHING TODAY

 

Junmyeon doesn’t even fight the grin from spreading on his face. He stares at his phone screen for a moment before he replies.

 

someone’s capslock is jammed I see~

 

[L] im so proud of you myeon

[L] what should I send you as a gift

 

It’s suddenly warm inside his chest. Junmyeon feels a tap on his shoulder. His publisher Minseok is telling him to hurry.

 

‘A moment!’ he smiles before getting back to his phone.

 

your best selca will do ;-)

 

[L] aww youre really my biggest fan huh :’3

 

=

 

Junmyeon met Yixing through Instagram three years ago.

 

He had opened the account to post short stories and share some updates about his published novels and on-going works. He had a quite huge number of followers and all the readers seemed to enjoy his tendency in writing angst themed stories. However, more than a year into it, he had to stop writing. It went on for months, until at the end of Winter at the year after, an account sent a message through his DM.

 

‘Hello, Suho! I hope you’re alright. You haven’t updated for eight months, it has been worrying me and surely others. Are you in some slump? I’ve been in a slump before and it . Take all the time you needed, don’t feel pressured! I’ll be waiting patiently! Here’s a little bit of my guitar play to cheer you up, in case you need it.’

 

A video was sent before the message.

 

Junmyeon immediately looked for Sehun and asked him to listen to the song and tell him how it sounded. Sehun had because of the sweet message first, then he looked touched while listening to the video.

 

‘This person covered Michael Bolton’s Lean On Me. It was simple yet beautiful.’ Sehun had signed to him. ‘It sounded like a pro!’

 

Junmyeon spent hours checking out – stalking, maybe? – the posts in the account. Apparently the person behind the account was a well-known musician who went by the name of ‘Lay’. No other information about the person except the name and that the person was a ‘he’.

 

It was rare for Junmyeon to reply to messages, but for that person who had been so sweet to him, he replied with a form of gratitude and an additional question.

 

‘Can we be friends?’

 

 

 

‘He’s explaining the summary of the story’s plot.’

 

Junmyeon nods at Sehun in acknowledgement before he pays attention to the stage in front of them again, where Minseok is sitting with a microphone in his right hand and the novel in his left. Minseok says something, and Junmyeon watches as the audience in front of him laugh, judging by the movement of their body. He turns to Sehun to ask about it, finding Sehun is chuckling lightly.

 

‘He said he can’t spoil more about the story because he’s afraid the author would fire him.’

 

Nodding, Junmyeon’s head leans back in a silent laughter. It’s always fun to attend the launching of his work as one of the audience. The more the years go by, the more he finds it the perfect decision when he decided to go with ‘Suho’ as an alias, completely shielding his true identity.

 

Aside of Yixing, the only ones who know the real Suho are his publisher Kim Minseok and his caretaker slash best friend slash roommate, Oh Sehun.

 

Minseok and Sehun have been doing a great job in keeping a secret about the author who cannot hear.

 

Again, he’s glad that he had dropped the responsibility as an author; describing their new work as much as possible to intrigue readers yet also as less as possible not to spoil the entire plot. However, if he can actually talk, he’ll be happy to say some things about his new novel.

 

‘Six Hundred Miles is about a guy who falls in love with another guy who is six hundred miles away from him. It’s about two people who love each other as much as they are able to, putting faith in one another.’

 

‘It’s about choosing not to use melancholic excuses to prevent love from blooming.’

 

=

 

When he opens his DM with Yixing, the first thing he sees is a picture of Yixing grinning at the camera.

 

And his cheeks immediately burn.

 

He feels a nudge on his shoulder. Sehun is eyeing him suspiciously.

 

‘Having the best time of your life, huh?’ Sehun signs at him.

 

Junmyeon smiles sheepishly.

 

‘Isn’t he beautiful?’

 

 

 

[L] so

[L] when are u sending the novel?

 

do u really wanna read it tho

 

[L] hello? I understand Korean very well

 

that’s not what I’m talking abt

 

[L] then what

[L] of COURSE I wanna read it

[L] I want to read a full length story from u

[L] u cant satisfy me with short stories

 

youre really a big fan of mine

 

[L] who says I’m not? ;-)

 

=

 

It was only a year into their friendship that Junmyeon finally got brave enough.

 

It happened slowly yet swiftly at the same time. He finally trusted Yixing enough to let him know his real name. Yixing, who had went under the alias ‘Lay’, replied him with the same favor. They started off as Suho and Lay, exchanged gratitude and praises for each other, shared thoughts and opinions of some things they could talk of. Then after they became Junmyeon and Yixing, suddenly everything escalated to another direction. They began to talk more, and fairly sensitive topics were added into their conversations. Yixing was always sweet and understanding, and Junmyeon always returned it with the same manner. In the subtlest way, they mirrored each other.

 

Without him realizing it, they had gotten to the point where they would send each other pictures of their own faces. To the point where he would naturally ask how is Yixing’s cat doing, while Yixing would ask him to send Sehun his regards. As much as they still have their own privacy, they also had shared so many things of their lives with each other.

 

Except that Junmyeon never told Yixing about his hearing impairment.

 

He kept asking himself if he should. If it matters.

 

Maybe it does. All these time, Yixing sent him videos of him playing his guitar and always asked him to comment about his play. Junmyeon always asked Sehun to listen to them for him and tell him what he should say to Yixing. To think again, it can be considered as lying.

 

One of these days, he should come clean to Yixing. But not so soon; he doesn’t want to break the magic yet.

 

Which means, giving the novel to Yixing should wait.

 

The story was based on them after all; the deaf guy and the musician.

 

It’s about him and Yixing; what they have been, what they haven’t been, and what he wishes they could be.

 

 

 

[L] good morning, author-nim

[L] I and Sheep wish you a great day!

[> Photo]

 

Wiping his sleepy eyes, Junmyeon taps on the photo to open it. He unknowingly smiles; how could he not, when he’s already offered such an adorable sight in the morning?

 

It’s a picture of Yixing, puckering his lips to his white cat. Hair messy from bed, over sized tee hugging his figure.

 

He rests his arm on the mattress, phone still tight in his hand. Junmyeon keeps staring at the picture, letting his head runs thousands of imaginations. The smile doesn’t leave his face while a small wave of bitterness washes over him gradually.

 

Finger hovering on the screen, he pretends to caress Yixing’s cheek with his thumb.

 

“I wish you are here.” He mouths. “I wish I can say it to you.”

 

=

 

When did he fall in love with Yixing?

 

When did he realize he’s in love with Yixing?

 

Junmyeon can’t pinpoint it. Even if he tries to remember at what point of their relationship did it become more than just a sweet friendship for him, he would end up recalling so many moments where Yixing made his heart skip a beat. He can’t determine the exact point. All he knows is that he’s in love with a guy he met through social media. That, alone, is a cheesy romance story material.

 

Except that his story with Yixing isn’t going to be cheesy any longer, and it would never be romance.

 

It would be a story of unfinished feelings.

 

But if he was asked about what moments that made him fall deeper for Yixing, he can name them. Like that moment when Yixing panicked because he hadn’t replied to his message for a week. Or when he talked about his fear of having too many expectations if he made himself known by his readers and Yixing comforted him with a series of inside jokes. When Yixing shared a sad part of his childhood, where his parents had to work overseas and left him in the care of his grandparents. When Yixing sang Coldplay’s Fix You as a lullaby for him – he couldn’t even hear it but Sehun had said Yixing’s voice was the gentlest and warmest, and the description was enough to make him tear up.

 

In all those moments and every other moment, Junmyeon falls deeper for Yixing.

 

 

 

[L] it would’ve been cool if only we can see stars easily

[L] like from the window

[L] without having to go on mountains and all

 

ikr

it’s quite rare to have clear night sky here too

 

[L] hey

[L] isn’t your birthday in like ten days?

 

aw you remember

yeah

 

[L] I feel like I should do smth extra this year

 

that sounds

weird

 

[L] don’t start imagining stuffs

[L] what do u want for ur bday tho

 

nice wishes will do

and the cutest pic of Sheep

 

[L] its so easy to please you

 

I’m a simple man

 

=

 

‘They’re giving lots of great review for your novel!’

 

Junmyeon nods at Sehun, who has been translating Minseok’s words for him to sign languages. ‘What did they say?’ he signs back.

 

Checking his phone once more, Minseok reads something, while Sehun signs the words. ‘Six Hundred Miles, unlike Suho’s previous works, has a simple story plot which readers can already understand before they get to the second chapter. It’s a smart move from Suho to be releasing a delicate plot like this after establishing his reputation as a trustworthy writer, because if people don’t trust the author enough, they won’t check this novel out just by reading the synopsis.’

 

Pouting, Junmyeon tilts his head at Sehun. ‘And that is a good review?’

 

Sehun chuckles before he gestures again. ‘And because they believe he will give them good content no matter what, they end up reading his latest work, and thanks to their faith, they get to discover such a simple yet beautiful plot. Six Hundred Miles isn’t about someone fighting for his life, or anyone else’s. It isn’t about saving anybody or anything. Or about the art in karma. Or even painful death.’

 

‘It’s just about a man, gradually falling in love with a personality, with a series of kind and warm words, with a good heart. Who is learning to love himself in order to love another. Who isn’t ambitious when it comes to love.’

 

‘Who finds that an ending doesn’t have to be perfect for it to be a happy one.’

 

Junmyeon sighs softly, shifting his gaze away to the window.

 

That imperfect yet happy ending is fictional.

 

He still has to find whether his ending would be a happy or a sad one.

 

He doesn’t hope for a perfect one.

 

 

 

[L] morning, ramyeon

[> Photo]

[L] guess whos flying to seoul next week for your bday ;-)

 

=

 

He feels something drops onto the pit of his stomach.

 

He grabs his phone and gets off the bed, immediately scrambling out of his bedroom. He finds Sehun sitting on the couch at the living room, staring at the TV in boredom. His friend then looks surprised to see him breathless, mouthing “what’s wrong?” at him.

 

Tossing his phone at Sehun, he waits until his friend reads Yixing’s message. He expects Sehun to be shocked as well.

 

But Sehun just bites his lips, frowning a little.

 

He pokes Sehun’s knee to make him look up. ‘You knew?’ he signs.

 

Sehun doesn’t answer for a while before he nods.

 

‘He can’t come.’ He signs furiously. ‘I don’t want him to.’

 

Putting the phone aside, Sehun stands up slowly. ‘Maybe you should meet him in person first to decide if –‘

 

He nods his head.

 

‘Are you scared you’ll disappoint him?’ Sehun pauses for a moment. ‘Do you think of him so low like that?’

 

‘He’s perfect. That’s the problem. He’s perfect and I can’t even tell him that properly because I can’t even hear my own voice!’ Junmyeon feels his eyes burning. ‘I don’t want to be pitied. Especially not by him. The moment he does, I’ll lose him. I don’t want to lose him. I’d rather lie forever than to lose him!’

 

Sehun has been calm the whole time Junmyeon rapidly moves his hand around. When Junmyeon is done, Sehun finally lifts his hands.

 

‘That’s the thing with authors.’ He gestures. ‘You are so used to plan scenarios ahead that you assume things too much, not giving life a chance to actually happen first.’

 

Junmyeon stares at him.

 

‘Give him a chance.’ Sehun offers a soft smile. ‘Then you decide whether you lose him or not.’

 

=

 

you dont have to do that :(

 

[L] what do u mean -__-

[L] just wait for me~

[L] Sehun is so nice he offered to pick me up at the airport

 

yeah he told me

xing

are u really sure abt going here?

 

[L] I am

 

really?

what if I disappoint u?

 

[L] what

[L] why are u being emo out of sudden

[L] lets meet first and see if you disappoint me or not XD

 

xing

have I ever told u this before?

I feel so blessed to have this friendship with you

 

[L] whoa

[L] u okay there?

 

 

 

After a week, the day he dreaded arrives.

 

It’s his birthday, but he can’t even be a little bit happy about it. Sehun is picking Yixing up from the airport at the moment and the more the seconds go, the more he gets anxious. He can really lose the friendship he had built with Yixing through years today.

 

Yixing won’t stop being his friend, of course, but things would change. Yixing might think of him differently from today onwards. And he might, as what he despises, pity him too. Things would be awkward for Yixing and he might regret ever buying a ticket to fly here.

 

An hour later, he’s still not done with his thoughts. His eyes are on the door, and when the handle moves, he a breath in sudden fear. He immediately runs to his bedroom, slams the door harshly and leans against it. Maybe he really can’t do it; facing Yixing.

 

He feels the door being pushed against his back. He steps away to let it open, revealing a worried Sehun. His friend doesn’t say nor sign a thing, but his gaze is enough for Junmyeon to know that he’s encouraging him to go out.

 

After a moment, Junmyeon finally follows Sehun outside. It’s now or never.

 

He finds the familiar stranger standing next to the tall window behind his coach. Yixing is even more beautiful in person. His height is just exactly the same as Junmyeon’s. And the wide smile Yixing offers him the moment their gazes meet is too pretty for him not to reply it.

 

He falls deeper.

 

However, when Yixing takes a step towards him, he gestures him to stop. Confused, Yixing halts.

 

Junmyeon looks up at Sehun. “Please translate.” He mouths.

 

Sehun sighs before he nods.

 

Turning back at Yixing, Junmyeon starts to move his hands. ‘I have lied to you about something.’

 

Yixing blinks at Junmyeon, eyes widening.

 

Junmyeon gulps. ‘I never listened to your guitar plays. I always asked Sehun to listen to them for me. The comments I made are his.’ He pauses for a moment. ‘I’m deaf.’

 

He tries not to look at Yixing’s face; he’s scared of what he’d find.

 

After making sure Sehun is doing his job, he continues. ‘Four years ago, I got into an accident and lost my hearing and voice. It was permanent. I would never be able to hear anything but faint buzzing sounds inside my head. I would never be able to listen to you play the guitar, or even sing. I would never be able to hear you. Talking with me in person would be difficult.’

 

He freezes for a moment when Yixing walks towards him slowly. ‘If you still want to be my friend, I’ll be very thankful for it. If you decide that the thing between us will be better through our phones, I’ll be fine with it. If you don’t want to do anything with me anymore, I’ll understand.’

 

Yixing stops a few steps ahead before him.

 

‘I just want you to know, that knowing you has been the best thing in my life.’ Junmyeon gives him a smile; it tastes bitter and sweet at the same time. ‘And that I like you. Very much.’

 

When he realizes that he literally just confessed to Yixing, he turns to Sehun who is looking back at him with raised eyebrows.

 

‘Have you said that part?’ Junmyeon rapidly signs at him.

 

Sehun blinks. ‘Are you saying that I shouldn’t have?’

 

‘I wasn’t ready!’

 

‘But you just signed about it!’

 

When he turns back, he finds Yixing covering his lips with his hand; laughing. Yixing is laughing. He had just poured his heart out, and Yixing is laughing instead. He looks up at Sehun, finding his friend is also laughing.

 

‘See what he has to say.’ Sehun gestures at him.

 

Junmyeon then turns at Yixing once more.

 

And to his surprise, Yixing lifts both of his hands,

 

and signs, ‘I like you very much, too.’

 

He inhales sharply.

 

‘And I don’t think it will be difficult for us to talk.’ Yixing signs, grinning widely.

 

 

 

‘Fifteen years?’ Junmyeon signs, eyes as wide as saucers. ‘You’ve been mute for fifteen years?’

 

Yixing nods, smirking. ‘Enough time for me to master Chinese, Korean and English sign languages.’

 

‘What happened?’

 

‘Quite similar like you; a car crash. They couldn’t salvage my vocal chords. And just like you, that didn’t stop me from doing what I love. I had to change my goal from being a singer to a musician, but I still get to do music after all.’

 

Junmyeon stares at Yixing, warmth filling his chest. Yixing is glowing, and he feels so lucky to be able to witness it.

 

‘Instead of focusing on what we lost,’ Yixing signs, ‘we have to focus on what we still have. You can’t hear and speak anymore but you’re still here, aren’t you? Still a human being, doing great things. Don’t belittle yourself for not having what others have.’

 

He feels his eyes burning again.

 

Yixing bites his lips for a moment before he continues. ‘I came here to see you because I really like you. I want to know you more in person. And I had faith that you’ll accept me no matter what, because you’ve been such a good person in our talks. I had faith in you. Can’t you have faith in me too?’

 

That’s when his tears fall. Junmyeon feels angry at himself, for ever doubting Yixing, for assuming Yixing would immediately bail on him. ‘I’m sorry.’

 

Chuckling, Yixing put a hand on Junmyeon’s shoulder. The smile he gives him is so gentle and warm.

 

‘You’re perfect.’ Junmyeon signs.

 

Blushing slightly, Yixing retracts his hand. ‘You’re more soft-hearted than I thought.’

 

‘Thanks.’

 

Yixing grins. ‘Thank you, for feeling the same.’

 

Junmyeon exhales in relief.

 

‘Thank you for liking me.’

 

=

 

“So he finally found his soulmate, huh?”

 

Sehun sighs dreamily, eyes still on Junmyeon and Yixing at the dining table. “Yeah.”

 

“And you’re their matchmaker.” Minseok smirks at him. “I know what you did.”

 

“What?”

 

“You were the one who persuaded Yixing to come for Junmyeon’s birthday. A birthday present, huh?”

 

“Aw,” Sehun smirks back, “glad he can’t hear us. He would’ve killed me.”

 

Minseok shakes his head. “He’d be very thankful.”

 

“After killing me.”

 

“That strawberry pudding can’t even shoo cats away, Sehun.”

 

 

Spring has always been Junmyeon’s favorite season.

 

He loves the season for the scent of flowers and the vibrant colors it has. Despite the pain it also brings, he admits that everything is beautiful in Spring.

 

He’s on the couch in the living room of his apartment, back resting against the hand rest, legs stretched across the pillowed surface. Behind him is a tall window that covers almost the entire wall, perfectly showcasing the beautiful view of Seoul city outside, letting warm sunlight in. Secured between his fingers is a book. A novel, precisely. It’s opened at a certain page.

 

‘What is love, really?’

 

He looks up from the novel, and in front of him, at the other corner of the couch, sits Yixing, a classic brown guitar resting on his laps while slender, graceful fingers are dancing on its strings. He’s cut his fringe off last week, perfectly revealing his beautiful face, and Junmyeon finds himself nearly breathless by the sight.

 

As if he knows he’s being stared at, Yixing stops his fingers from picking on the strings and looks up to meet Junmyeon’s gaze. Then the man smiles at him, ever so gently, and suddenly everything is brighter.

 

A smile bloom on Junmyeon’s lips as well. He gives Yixing a thumb up.

 

‘You can’t even hear it.’ Yixing signs, smirking.

 

‘I can! With my heart.’ Junmyeon signs before putting a hand against his chest, smiling sweetly. He earns a pinch at the thigh from Yixing.

 

Between their smiles, Junmyeon says it inaudibly.

 

“I love you.”

 

Yixing gets it. He grins widely before mouthing back.

 

“I love you, too.”

 

‘This. This is love.’

 

‘And it’s perfect.’

 

 

 

[A/N]

Happy 27^th birthday, our bunny leader Suho Kim Junmyeon!